Are you made for marriage?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

Nehemiah6

Senior Member
Jul 18, 2017
26,074
13,777
113
#21
Do you feel that you were made for marriage?
Everyone is made for marriage. That's exactly what the Bible says. So singles, there are no excuses.:cool:
 

BenFTW

Senior Member
Oct 7, 2012
4,834
981
113
34
#23
Everyone is made for marriage. That's exactly what the Bible says. So singles, there are no excuses.:cool:
I see that you’re married (according to your profile) and in accordance with the topic, have you found yourself marriage material? Do you have the traits to have a lasting covenant? Is your wife happy? 😄 Are you happy? Has your marriage shown you things you excel at and other things you need to grow in?
 
S

Scribe

Guest
#24
Cuddling is good for marriage too! 😁 lol
Naw they will make you get up and work in the yard or give you a list of tasks. No naps after marriage.
 

Nehemiah6

Senior Member
Jul 18, 2017
26,074
13,777
113
#25
I see that you’re married (according to your profile) and in accordance with the topic, have you found yourself marriage material? Do you have the traits to have a lasting covenant? Is your wife happy? Are you happy? Has your marriage shown you things you excel at and other things you need to grow in?
Any response to this would be classified as bragging. So let's leave it at that. People should focus on whether God intended for all human beings to be married.
 
G

Godsgirl83

Guest
#26
You haven’t observed that one being natural? Have you ever fought with your siblings and it just gets swept under the rug? It’s nothing, you know you still love each other. I find not all wrongs need an apology and some do need to be addressed, especially if amends need to be made. There are times where people just have an understanding, and all is well. Life goes on and “there’s no use crying over spilled milk.”

Sometimes an apology is due for the sake of their peace, so they can feel a release. You may have gotten over it, but it may be festering for them. Reconcile.

I think it’s a bit of a natural phenomenon of love, keeping no record of wrongs. Of course if the offense is greater than casual, it may have to be a decision. “God forgives me, so I ought to also forgive as God for Christ’s sake forgave me.” Kind of goes into the “those who are forgiven much love much.” It can be a strengthening of a relationship. My dad’s best friend is someone who has... pardon my language, screwed him in business multiple times and yet they are best friends. 😅 Thats clearly a God thing.

Over all, I believe it is a truth that love keeps no record of wrongs, and I’ve witnessed it in the lives of others and in the example of siblings.
(just my opinion and observations here)
It's one thing to work things out with siblings and friends......
but a whole lot harder when it comes to a spouse.......
I'm not saying that it isn't possible, just a little harder......
definitely requires some grace.
But then I guess that is one area where learning to love like Jesus, love unconditionally comes into play.
 

BenFTW

Senior Member
Oct 7, 2012
4,834
981
113
34
#27
(just my opinion and observations here)
It's one thing to work things out with siblings and friends......
but a whole lot harder when it comes to a spouse.......
I'm not saying that it isn't possible, just a little harder......
definitely requires some grace.
But then I guess that is one area where learning to love like Jesus, love unconditionally comes into play.
I’ve seen my parents have disagreements and essentially it comes down to “You’re lucky I can’t stay mad at you.” 😂 It’s cute, because they love each other and also, my mom needs my dad to make her coffee exactly how she likes it. 😋 ☕️

People realize they were being silly, unreasonable, and nothing but a bashful look is all that’s needed. Like, “I’m sorry.”

And yes, I’ve seen a spouse suck up to the other spouse to soften them up. Making amends. 😄 🍫 💐 🌹 🍽

Sometimes people need space, I’ve noticed. They aren’t ready to receive an apology, and are still, well, fuming. Some people are quick to forgive and others have to mull it over. It depends on the person, and even so, where the Lord has matured them.

Some people realize life is too short to be mad, and they should rather appreciate the life they have been given and honor their spouse as Christ loved the church. They seek peace and unity. They love the person after all.

All in all, it depends on the person and the standard they follow (Jesus).
 
R

Ruby123

Guest
#28
In some ways I am ready for marriage, in other ways I'm not. I'm not in a rush, I used to be but thankfully that seems to have disappeared.
 

BenFTW

Senior Member
Oct 7, 2012
4,834
981
113
34
#29
Any response to this would be classified as bragging. So let's leave it at that. People should focus on whether God intended for all human beings to be married.
Oh oh oh, Mr. Nehemiah is a catch? 😁 😄 Good job Nehemiah. 👍🏻

What went through your mind before your marriage? Did you think or know you were ready? Did you have worries or concerns? Were you nervous? Were you confident in knowing you could meet her needs? Did you feel marriage was definitely something desired in life?

Now I want the testimony of Mrs. Nehemiah. 😄 What’s the story? Come on... you can share.
 
Jul 20, 2019
1,228
882
113
#30
I think there is a strength in being confident in who you are, knowing who you are and being satisfied with yourself as a person. You go into the relationship whole. Since you’re whole, what can you do but give? 😉

It’s also important to receive however, and you might be surprised at how much you appreciate affection. People want acceptance, it’s only natural. You may say you are perfectly content alone, but maybe you’ll be even more satisfied in a relationship? You may have more to offer than you realize.
during my afternoon nap, as per usual I was praying, the lord told me in no uncertain terms who this person actually is and I am to wait for her! What a mighty God we have!
 
R

Ruby123

Guest
#31
during my afternoon nap, as per usual I was praying, the lord told me in no uncertain terms who this person actually is and I am to wait for her! What a mighty God we have!
Hasn't that happened a few times already though??
 
Nov 26, 2012
3,095
1,050
113
#32
Do you feel that you were made for marriage? Are you of the right temperament? Do you feel like you are lacking something for marriage or do you feel that you are equipped for marriage?

For myself I feel like I need to accomplish certain things beforehand. If I am being honest before all of you, lately I’ve been feeling destitute. If you look at the definition of destitute it means “lacking the basic necessities for life.” I feel that way lately, about life. I find myself asking, “How do people live this life?” I feel so inadequate.

Beyond certain things that I need to accomplish and have happen though, I do believe God is preparing me and has prepared me for marriage and made me for it. I remember one time my parents speaking of me, and my mother said, “Ben can bring joy into any situation.” I have found oftentimes when people are in disagreement I try to bring laughter into the situation. To bring peace, and simmer things down. I believe this is a good marriage trait, to maintain peace. I always pray to the Lord that in my marriage (to be) that our household is a household of peace, love, and joy.

So, do you find yourself being created for marriage? Do you see traits in yourself that tend to a lasting covenant? Do you see areas that you want the Lord to work on?

I know for me, I know God sanctifies us and with marriage in mind, I pray God sanctifies me and prepares me for a beautiful marriage. I have a song lyric I wrote and it says, “Make me a saint, I want no complaint.” It also says, “Purify me, sanctify me. My heart, my mind, and my emotions in line.” I hope that God is preparing me, and her for each other. I believe He is.

I just thought it might be an interesting thread. Are you made for marriage?
I can tell you that nothing gets you prepared for marriage except marriage. Until that sweet woman who is crazy about you and wants nothing more than your happiness, has children, you can’t understand. Then she’s just crazy. It’s a hormonal nightmare. Nothing can prepare you for that. Successful marriage isn’t based on how well you prepare. It’s how well you adapt.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,434
9,414
113
#33
I don't think we are either made for marriage or not. I think we can choose. We can also choose to develop the qualities that make a marriage work well, or choose not to. We can also choose to go after the right kind of person or the kind of person we know is wrong for us.

Claiming "I'm made for marriage" or "I'm just not made for that" shirks the responsibility for the choices I have made in my life. It's a lot like an impatient person saying "I'm just made this way, to be impatient" instead of learning patience.
 
Mar 4, 2020
8,614
3,691
113
#35
Do you feel that you were made for marriage? Are you of the right temperament? Do you feel like you are lacking something for marriage or do you feel that you are equipped for marriage?

For myself I feel like I need to accomplish certain things beforehand. If I am being honest before all of you, lately I’ve been feeling destitute. If you look at the definition of destitute it means “lacking the basic necessities for life.” I feel that way lately, about life. I find myself asking, “How do people live this life?” I feel so inadequate.

Beyond certain things that I need to accomplish and have happen though, I do believe God is preparing me and has prepared me for marriage and made me for it. I remember one time my parents speaking of me, and my mother said, “Ben can bring joy into any situation.” I have found oftentimes when people are in disagreement I try to bring laughter into the situation. To bring peace, and simmer things down. I believe this is a good marriage trait, to maintain peace. I always pray to the Lord that in my marriage (to be) that our household is a household of peace, love, and joy.

So, do you find yourself being created for marriage? Do you see traits in yourself that tend to a lasting covenant? Do you see areas that you want the Lord to work on?

I know for me, I know God sanctifies us and with marriage in mind, I pray God sanctifies me and prepares me for a beautiful marriage. I have a song lyric I wrote and it says, “Make me a saint, I want no complaint.” It also says, “Purify me, sanctify me. My heart, my mind, and my emotions in line.” I hope that God is preparing me, and her for each other. I believe He is.

I just thought it might be an interesting thread. Are you made for marriage?
In marriage there is a lot of responsibility. Partners expect a lot out of each other whether it's being financially stable, providing material support, being emotionally available, present for raising children, being loving enough, good at X, Y, and Z things. All while juggling the myriad of responsibilities demanded from life.

Marriage probably doesn't always fit neatly and orderly into the box of life, but if it does then great.

We occasionally mess up and become inadequate to do what we should at all times. So I would say, be prepared to have a lot of grace, forgiveness, and patience to be "made for marriage." Because over a timeline of a lifelong pact with someone else these sorts of challenges I mentioned could possibly show up. Just something to think about.
 
Nov 26, 2012
3,095
1,050
113
#36
during my afternoon nap, as per usual I was praying, the lord told me in no uncertain terms who this person actually is and I am to wait for her! What a mighty God we have!
I’m curious. If you are open to elaborate I would love to know which uncertain terms, and why must you wait for her? Is she already married or more of a friend that will undoubtedly surrender to your charms given time?
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#37
I notice with the 'understanding' only comes because if the woman doesnt agree with the man she has nowhere to go. as she is bound. Its cruel to bind a woman, we are not called to bondage in such cases.

If you are in the Lord, its supposedly ok, but very few men actually have the self control not to beat up on their wife. life is too short to be mad, yes, but a short temper can actually hurt someone, a blow can be over in a second but can damage for a lifetime. why would you want to live with such drama if everyday your spouse got mad at you for petty things like if they forgot to make your coffee or something.. Only if you had alzhemiers maybe and didnt remember stuff. It would wear you down. Maybe you would,start to feel incompetent if you couldnt get things right all the time and it would no longer be 'cute'. Ive seen that happen.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#38
yep if if there was one thing you might need over everything else especially in marriage its grace.
God says my grace is sufficient for you.

your spouse could do everything wrong. But if they leave they are no longer your spouse. however if you bind up grace to say she cant leave, is it still grace? hmm
 

melita916

Senior Member
Aug 12, 2011
10,464
2,692
113
#39
for a long time, i felt i wasn't relationship material. then, i felt i was too different to be a wife.

the Lord changes things... and people :)
 
Jul 20, 2019
1,228
882
113
#40
I’m curious. If you are open to elaborate I would love to know which uncertain terms, and why must you wait for her? Is she already married or more of a friend that will undoubtedly surrender to your charms given time?
its a very long story, but basically she chose the easy way and went back to her high school boyfriend rather than be with me, as there is a large age difference here. There would probably great animosity if she had of carried on with me. However now I believe she regrets that decision. Leave it to the lord. As I have experienced real love for the first time, I was seeking it elsewhere. You get love from Jesus and yourself, it a tough lesson I had to learn. Now I find she is returning in due time. her boyfriend and her are not married.