Entering a relationship is a calculated risk. Eventually, you have to let the dice fly and see what comes up. Either that or remain alone. wondering what could have been
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It's not like that. She asked to met for coffee. Said she was happy to here from me. She's the same sweetheart that she has always been. She used to tell me that I was destined for great things. I did
alright for me and my family most my life. Now that is all but gone and she has done so well for herself
(which I always new she would)
I hear you. Perhaps it’s worth just going with the notion of being friends and if anything else happens, then great. I believe there are some women out there who will like you for you and not your material possessions or what you consider is now gone. Whatever the case, leaving it in God’s hands is necessary and takes a lot of the stressors out relying on Him.
Apologies if I’m missing the idea here.
C
CozHElivesIcanface2morrow
Guest
Yes! There are women out there not caring about financial status of a man you are not wrong about this great observation
My English is not so good and please correct me if I am wrong...He said "She's married" to a judge...that means she is currently married and meeting a married woman for a coffee in my opinion is not a good thing most especially if she is alone and he is alone...
if they are with their respective families example the woman's husband is around or her kids and 1Christian's kids I guess that should be ok...I apologize for interrupting...
S
Scribe
Guest
Married to a JUDGE no less.Yes! There are women out there not caring about financial status of a man you are not wrong about this great observation
My English is not so good and please correct me if I am wrong...He said "She's married" to a judge...that means she is currently married and meeting a married woman for a coffee in my opinion is not a good thing most especially if she is alone and he is alone...
I apologize for interrupting...
I missed the judge part, yikes. Yes, yes that would make quite a bit of difference here.. and I would have to agree with your post.Yes! There are women out there not caring about financial status of a man you are not wrong about this great observation
My English is not so good and please correct me if I am wrong...He said "She's married" to a judge...that means she is currently married and meeting a married woman for a coffee in my opinion is not a good thing most especially if she is alone and he is alone...
I apologize for interrupting...
I'm a man. I don't really care if the woman chases or not. I don't think women chase much though, at least not me anyways.
I wouldn't mind a lady chasing me maybe, but it feels more like a cultural thing. Local men chasing local women is a norm, I think. It's in a lot of media and such. So local women somewhat are comfortable with it. Or they at least have well-known supports or ways to handle it. I don't think the opposite is true where I live. If a woman chase me, I don't think that I'd know how to handle it much. There aren't much media about women chasing men, at least not to my knowledge. Rather, I feel men are taught to be wary of women who chase, even in some media.
I wouldn't mind a lady chasing me though, as long as I knew about her and stuff. I'd have to counter-stalk her. lol. But again, women just don't chase me. Then again, I don't really go out much.
I wouldn't mind a lady chasing me maybe, but it feels more like a cultural thing. Local men chasing local women is a norm, I think. It's in a lot of media and such. So local women somewhat are comfortable with it. Or they at least have well-known supports or ways to handle it. I don't think the opposite is true where I live. If a woman chase me, I don't think that I'd know how to handle it much. There aren't much media about women chasing men, at least not to my knowledge. Rather, I feel men are taught to be wary of women who chase, even in some media.
I wouldn't mind a lady chasing me though, as long as I knew about her and stuff. I'd have to counter-stalk her. lol. But again, women just don't chase me. Then again, I don't really go out much.
see thread on stalkers. its scary being stalked by a man and its no laughing matter.
I dont know why a man would WANT to be stalked by a woman though. Reminds me of Potiphers wife and Joseph. He did run away, but she made a big thing of it and falsely accused him when he refused her advances.
I dont know why a man would WANT to be stalked by a woman though. Reminds me of Potiphers wife and Joseph. He did run away, but she made a big thing of it and falsely accused him when he refused her advances.
Examples of women chasing men they like are:
- Going to the same supermarket the men go to just in case they bump into them
- Joining the same co-ed sports leagues the men are part of
- Attending the same rock band shows that the men like to go to
- Making friends with the men's friends
- Inviting the men to parties and get-togethers
- Posting messages on their facebook page or replying to their online posts on social media platforms
- Sending emails or messages to see how they're doing
None of those qualify as stalking. Do not confuse the two. It is OK to chase.
- Going to the same supermarket the men go to just in case they bump into them
- Joining the same co-ed sports leagues the men are part of
- Attending the same rock band shows that the men like to go to
- Making friends with the men's friends
- Inviting the men to parties and get-togethers
- Posting messages on their facebook page or replying to their online posts on social media platforms
- Sending emails or messages to see how they're doing
None of those qualify as stalking. Do not confuse the two. It is OK to chase.
What is cool is that she made know mention of the "judge" coming along. What is it going to hurt. I would love to see her again after all these year's. It's innocent enough, Right?
Hey Butterfly, This is what I was asking. Do you think that it would be inappropriate ? I have the up most respect for her and her family. I would never, in a million year's interfere with that. I look at it more like a class reunion. still no?
My two cents is as much as the flesh wants to, I truly believe if she’s married that it’s only appropriate given her husband is there at least. Given that you know and like her more than a friend, it only seems appropriate to void you or her of any temptation. Biblical principle is to flee from temptation-
Mat 26:41 - Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak. KJ
S
Scribe
Guest
LOL. Your conscience is screaming at you even in your posts. You know the answer. If you were married to her how would you feel about her going to visit an old school crush that broke her heart because he did not invite her to a prom? Or any male school friend? I don't think you would like it if she did not tell you. And I don't think you would like it if she asked you if it was ok. I knew my marriage was over when my ex asked if it was ok if an old college boyfriend took her and her mom to the state fair. It was already on the rocks, but when she asked that I knew she was already fishing for her future sugar daddy. But think about it like this. If she told you where she went to church and to come visit her and meet her family that would be fine. You would assume that she would tell her husband and this would be ok in their minds, and then it is just up to your comfort level. If she is willing to meet you without telling her husband that is not a good sign and I would lose respect for her integrity. It is never ok to meet old school flames for coffee and not tell your mate. Never.
I'm sorry for what happened to you Scribe. I don't know how this turned from me not feeling good enough
to a sexual thing. That was never my intention. More of a self preservation thing ,you know?
And the matter of my friend. If you knew her you would know that this would never enter her mind.
I have no doubt that she has told her husband. They are very much in love and she has four beautiful daughter's that are doing outstanding in their lives. One of the first things that attracted me to her was her character. having said that, I contacted (or tried to) two other mutual friend's of our's, 1 other that I hav'nt seen since high school.This might turn into a great reunion. I really should have opened with this but
she is a devout Christian. Always has been. Another big attraction.
S
Scribe
Guest
I never mentioned sex. It is an ethics thing. The idea of wanting to meet up with a married woman that you used to have an attraction for and still do apparently. It is frowned upon. This would be a good example in Ministerial Ethics class. I have another one. Should a divorced man communicate with an ex wife who is married to another man. Should he go through the other husband if something needs to be communicated? No kids involved. What if the ex wife starts emailing after 10 years but is still married. Should the christian man communicate with her? It's an ethics question.
The only reason that I would have anything to do with my ex would have to do with our child. Otherwise
no good reason to get in touch. What I was trying to say was that I am happy for her and her life. Just wish that she could say the same of me. but being the person that she is, she will still see me for me. (Ihope, lol)... And why would you ever feel the need to speak to this person after what she put you through? Is she intentionally trying to get to you?
S