The Dating Age Range.

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I just realized that this thread was made in 09... whoops. It had just shown up on my feed here and I should have looked at that closer.
 
This thread...

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herkamer63 said:
Really all depends, I guess. Right now, I'm not looking for anyone, although, there is a woman (42) in my ballroom dance class that is older than I (35) that might be interested in me. Good looking, too, and very nice.

Anyway, it depends on their maturity along with other factors. I've met women in their 20s who were more mature than ones in their 30s. However, for the average man, it's hard to find someone close in age. Even trying to find someone younger is tough. A lot of women, especially younger women, are taught that they're entitled to the guys that are 9/10 or 10/10, not even giving a normal guy any sort of a chance. And so many of them are extremely immature. I thought this 23 year old woman, but changed my mind when she was giving more attention to the guys closer in age or simply better looking than me.

That's why it's tempting for me to ask out this older woman. Most of what's holding me back IS age, and not just because of her either. She has two kids in their early 20s, one of them already has kids. So not only she's a single mother, but also a young grandmother. I just don't know if it would be right if I did. The maturity is there, at least from what I'm seeing, but the things I just laid out is giving me all sorts of pause. Her kids and the rest of her family, her friends, MY family and friends, and most importantly, which I'm worried about the most, is even if everyone was okay if we became a couple, would it be a godly relationship? So just keep in mind, yes, maturity is very important, but it needs to be right by God's standards above all else.
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Hey... age of the thread aside, the topic is obviously perennially relevant.

I say you cannot worry about what family or friends think. They're not living your life.

As for the rest, those are more practical concerns that only you can ultimately decide. But, seeking God's guidance and pastoral advice might help.
 
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Gojira said:
Hey... age of the thread aside, the topic is obviously perennially relevant.

I say you cannot worry about what family or friends think. They're not living your life.

As for the rest, those are more practical concerns that only you can ultimately decide. But, seeking God's guidance and pastoral advice might help.
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Actually I agree with you about most of it. The topic IS one that can be legitimately dug up. And I even agree that I don't give a fart in a whirlwind what most people think of what I say.

But when a forum oldster gives you some friendly advice about general forum etiquette and you reply, "If that bothers you, no one's forcing you to endure the "bother"." that tells me you're probably the petulant kind with an "I'm gonna do what I want to do, and complain about anybody who doesn't like it" attitude.

Kinda like this:
defensive_profile.png

So when you snapped at me, I was like :D :D :D :D :D yay! Because in my experience people like that are so entertaining... while they last. They usually get all offended after a while and leave in a huff, but while they are here they can be a hoot!

So if you're that kind of person, I got the popcorn ready. :cool:

Just to be clear though, I didn't say it was a bad thing to revive THIS thread. I was just commenting about grave-digging in general, how it is perceived by many here and why some people gave you negative reactions.
 
herkamer63 said:
Really all depends, I guess. Right now, I'm not looking for anyone, although, there is a woman (42) in my ballroom dance class that is older than I (35) that might be interested in me. Good looking, too, and very nice.

Anyway, it depends on their maturity along with other factors. I've met women in their 20s who were more mature than ones in their 30s. However, for the average man, it's hard to find someone close in age. Even trying to find someone younger is tough. A lot of women, especially younger women, are taught that they're entitled to the guys that are 9/10 or 10/10, not even giving a normal guy any sort of a chance. And so many of them are extremely immature. I thought this 23 year old woman, but changed my mind when she was giving more attention to the guys closer in age or simply better looking than me.

That's why it's tempting for me to ask out this older woman. Most of what's holding me back IS age, and not just because of her either. She has two kids in their early 20s, one of them already has kids. So not only she's a single mother, but also a young grandmother. I just don't know if it would be right if I did. The maturity is there, at least from what I'm seeing, but the things I just laid out is giving me all sorts of pause. Her kids and the rest of her family, her friends, MY family and friends, and most importantly, which I'm worried about the most, is even if everyone was okay if we became a couple, would it be a godly relationship? So just keep in mind, yes, maturity is very important, but it needs to be right by God's standards above all else.
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The longer one waits to begin a relationship the more likelihood of baggage. You just have to decide what is truly important and make a decision to either go for it or let it go. That ballroom dance woman scenario seems viable. Since she is a little older she could probably show you a few new moves on the dance floor. Good looking? Nice? Yeah, you might want to give that some thought. What exactly are God's standards? If you strictly listened to Paul you would never get married. Is this woman a Christian or have Christian qualities? God's standard is perfection. If you wait for Ms. Perfect you will spend the rest of your life alone.
 
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Lynx said:
They are trying to indicate that you have dug up a very, very old thread. Last comment in this thread was from 2009... More than TWO DECADES ago.

However...

This thread's topic is a perennial. It comes up all the time, whether in a new thread every now and then or in an old thread someone dug up. If you had not disinterred this thread, someone would have started a new one on the topic any day now.
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Closer to one decade ago but of course higher mathematics was never my strong suit. :)
 
Lynx said:
Actually I agree with you about most of it. The topic IS one that can be legitimately dug up. And I even agree that I don't give a fart in a whirlwind what most people think of what I say.

But when a forum oldster gives you some friendly advice about general forum etiquette and you reply, "If that bothers you, no one's forcing you to endure the "bother"." that tells me you're probably the petulant kind with an "I'm gonna do what I want to do, and complain about anybody who doesn't like it" attitude.

Kinda like this:
View attachment 230391

So when you snapped at me, I was like :D:D:D:D:D yay! Because in my experience people like that are so entertaining... while they last. They usually get all offended after a while and leave in a huff, but while they are here they can be a hoot!

So if you're that kind of person, I got the popcorn ready. :cool:

Just to be clear though, I didn't say it was a bad thing to revive THIS thread. I was just commenting about grave-digging in general, how it is perceived by many here and why some people gave you negative reactions.
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I've already said that I'm used to forums, even Christian ones, being argumentative places. I ain't leaving.

And, your comments were not "friendly". They weren't nasty, but they weren't friendly, either.

I hold to my position. If the threads were supposed to be done with, why keep them up? If the topics are always relevant, why ignore them?

Ridiculous.
 
tourist said:
Closer to one decade ago but of course higher mathematics was never my strong suit. :)
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It was early in the morning and I've been running on 4.5 hours of sleep. I woke up WAY too early and couldn't get back to sleep for nuthin.
 
Lynx said:
It was early in the morning and I've been running on 4.5 hours of sleep. I woke up WAY too early and couldn't get back to sleep for nuthin.
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Now let me see if I remember clearly - you don't drink coffee right? A couple nights ago I had one of those fitful sleeps too.
 
Gojira said:
I've already said that I'm used to forums, even Christian ones, being argumentative places. I ain't leaving.

And, your comments were not "friendly". They weren't nasty, but they weren't friendly, either.

I hold to my position. If the threads were supposed to be done with, why keep them up? If the topics are always relevant, why ignore them?

Ridiculous.
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Now now. @Lynx is one of the good guys. We're all family here. Honestly, he never claimed to be friendly - only folksy. Erudite too - that might be a sophisticated way of saying snob. No, he's not a snob either. I just threw that in 'cause I'm a wild and crazy guy. Seriously.
 
It only matters if she is not the right one. I historically would never consider someone even a couple years younger, but now wonder if someone is the perfect match, if age really should matter.
 
tourist said:
Now let me see if I remember clearly - you don't drink coffee right? A couple nights ago I had one of those fitful sleeps too.
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Only in dire emergencies, like when I've only had 4.5 hours of sleep and I gotta get through a whole w*rk day.

Yesterday I went to w*rk and ordered a caramel sundae. I poured it in a large coffee cup and poured coffee over it. I called it a caramel frappuccino. (Frappuccino is that drink for people who claim they like coffee, but really what they like is ice cream.) It is the least objectionable way I have found to consume coffee.

One of the teens saw me doing this and said, "I like the way you think!" I may have started something...
 
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