Finding Jesus

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Z

ZealPlaysBass

New member
#1
Sep 2, 2021
6
0
1
#1
Hi guys!

I'm currently 17 years old and about 3 months ago truly found Christ. I went to a Christian primary school, but my parents were never religious, a Christian secondary school and I am currently in a Christian college. Religion has always been a big part of my life and about last year, I would start praying every night. It was never a "good prayer". It would always be saying like "Thanks for my friends, I'm sorry for my sins, please can this happen to me". It was selfish praying. I would still sin quite a lot, too. However, something changed about 2-3 months ago. I picked up my Bible (the only Bible in my house is this small red Bible I got when I was 11 and it is only the new testament. I really need a new one!) and started reading. I became more consistent with my prayers, I started following Christian Instagram accounts, I listen to some Christian-based music (I need to fix this about myself because whenever I do listen to it, it makes me feel great but I always choose secular music, instead) and I started noticing things I wouldn't have earlier in my life. When something happens that is wrong, getting feelings inside me when I pray, noticing more and more etc. I remember I was doing an exam I was stressed about, I prayed to God many times beforehand and it was a dark and gloomy day. 20 minutes left, as I was about to give up, the sun came through my window. I had a new lease of life. I finished the exam and was just over the moon with glee and joy because my connection with God in that moment was immense.
However, as I write this, something has been playing at the back of my mind. I keep getting the idea that me saying "Jesus does not exist" sounds true. It angers me because I'm not sure what has changed for me to think this. I think it must be the devil or it might be God testing me but something is there telling me He doesn't exist. I am still praying every night and I try to every morning before I do anything. I haven't been reading my Bible as much the last couple of nights but I always will attempt. I am repenting for my sins, I am realising when I have done something wrong and I know I should repent. But I still keep getting this thought that Jesus isn't real and I don't know what to do.
I thought I would come to this forum to talk about it because I don't know too many Christians in my personal life and I feel that maybe I can get a lot of different views and ideas on this matter.
Please, any response would be appreciated.

-Charlie Zeal
 
G

Gideon300

Well-known member
#2
Mar 18, 2021
5,347
3,148
113
#2
ZealPlaysBass said:
Hi guys!

I'm currently 17 years old and about 3 months ago truly found Christ. I went to a Christian primary school, but my parents were never religious, a Christian secondary school and I am currently in a Christian college. Religion has always been a big part of my life and about last year, I would start praying every night. It was never a "good prayer". It would always be saying like "Thanks for my friends, I'm sorry for my sins, please can this happen to me". It was selfish praying. I would still sin quite a lot, too. However, something changed about 2-3 months ago. I picked up my Bible (the only Bible in my house is this small red Bible I got when I was 11 and it is only the new testament. I really need a new one!) and started reading. I became more consistent with my prayers, I started following Christian Instagram accounts, I listen to some Christian-based music (I need to fix this about myself because whenever I do listen to it, it makes me feel great but I always choose secular music, instead) and I started noticing things I wouldn't have earlier in my life. When something happens that is wrong, getting feelings inside me when I pray, noticing more and more etc. I remember I was doing an exam I was stressed about, I prayed to God many times beforehand and it was a dark and gloomy day. 20 minutes left, as I was about to give up, the sun came through my window. I had a new lease of life. I finished the exam and was just over the moon with glee and joy because my connection with God in that moment was immense.
However, as I write this, something has been playing at the back of my mind. I keep getting the idea that me saying "Jesus does not exist" sounds true. It angers me because I'm not sure what has changed for me to think this. I think it must be the devil or it might be God testing me but something is there telling me He doesn't exist. I am still praying every night and I try to every morning before I do anything. I haven't been reading my Bible as much the last couple of nights but I always will attempt. I am repenting for my sins, I am realising when I have done something wrong and I know I should repent. But I still keep getting this thought that Jesus isn't real and I don't know what to do.
I thought I would come to this forum to talk about it because I don't know too many Christians in my personal life and I feel that maybe I can get a lot of different views and ideas on this matter.
Please, any response would be appreciated.

-Charlie Zeal
Click to expand...
We have an enemy of our soul who does his best to get us off track. I was born in England. Everyone in my generation was considered to be Christian. It never occurred to me to doubt this. I was born again just before my 21st birthday. I had many attacks of doubt after that time. Satan does not fear the religious. He does fear those who are real Christians.

We need to know that our minds are open to suggestions from evil spirits. They pretend to be us. So you won't get an announcement saying that it is an evil spirit. It will say something like, "I'm not sure if Jesus is real". We must resist these thoughts. You should take authority over the evil spirit and command it to get out of your mind. Keep studying the word.

I suggest that you get a copy of "War on the Saints" by Jesse Penn-Lewis. It was a great help for me when I went through similar attacks. Fill your mind with truth also. You cannot think two thoughts at the same time. Thinking truth stops the invasion of lies.

The New Testament was written by people who knew Jesus. Peter and John were his disciples. James was Jesus' natural brother. Paul met Jesus on the road to Damascus. I suggest that you read the gospel of John until you become assured that Jesus is real. It was written so that we might believe. Ask God to help you. He loves us and He will help anyone who asks Him.
 
Z

ZealPlaysBass

New member
#3
Sep 2, 2021
6
0
1
#3
Wow! Thank you so much for your reply, it means a great deal to me! Despite all of this, I still pray each morning and each night, I still try to read my Bible each night. I will outgrow the devil. No weapon formed against me shall prosper.
War on the Saints. I'll give it a look! Never heard of it, nor the writer. Thank you.
And, if I remember correctly, I am currently on John right now but I would need to double check.
Thank you so much for your answer and God bless!

-Charlie Zeal
 
Magenta

Magenta

Senior Member
#4
Jul 3, 2015
60,135
29,452
113
#4

















Welcome! :)
 
Magenta

Magenta

Senior Member
#5
Jul 3, 2015
60,135
29,452
113
#5



Hello Charlie :) Hopefully, you may find this series helpful :D

There are ten videos altogether :) You can find the others on youtube...
 
M

mindfulzen

Banned
#11
Aug 4, 2021
586
185
43
#11
ZealPlaysBass said:
Wow! Thank you so much for your reply, it means a great deal to me! Despite all of this, I still pray each morning and each night, I still try to read my Bible each night. I will outgrow the devil. No weapon formed against me shall prosper.
War on the Saints. I'll give it a look! Never heard of it, nor the writer. Thank you.
And, if I remember correctly, I am currently on John right now but I would need to double check.
Thank you so much for your answer and God bless!

-Charlie Zeal
Click to expand...
You had better doublecheck then. And I think you would remember if you read John the baptists book, powerful stuff, so guess it is another one. God bless. Cool down a bit, you have time, you say you are 17
 
D

DrGuyPhD

Member
#12
May 23, 2020
58
47
18
#12
ZealPlaysBass said:
Hi guys!

I'm currently 17 years old and about 3 months ago truly found Christ. I went to a Christian primary school, but my parents were never religious, a Christian secondary school and I am currently in a Christian college. Religion has always been a big part of my life and about last year, I would start praying every night. It was never a "good prayer". It would always be saying like "Thanks for my friends, I'm sorry for my sins, please can this happen to me". It was selfish praying. I would still sin quite a lot, too. However, something changed about 2-3 months ago. I picked up my Bible (the only Bible in my house is this small red Bible I got when I was 11 and it is only the new testament. I really need a new one!) and started reading. I became more consistent with my prayers, I started following Christian Instagram accounts, I listen to some Christian-based music (I need to fix this about myself because whenever I do listen to it, it makes me feel great but I always choose secular music, instead) and I started noticing things I wouldn't have earlier in my life. When something happens that is wrong, getting feelings inside me when I pray, noticing more and more etc. I remember I was doing an exam I was stressed about, I prayed to God many times beforehand and it was a dark and gloomy day. 20 minutes left, as I was about to give up, the sun came through my window. I had a new lease of life. I finished the exam and was just over the moon with glee and joy because my connection with God in that moment was immense.
However, as I write this, something has been playing at the back of my mind. I keep getting the idea that me saying "Jesus does not exist" sounds true. It angers me because I'm not sure what has changed for me to think this. I think it must be the devil or it might be God testing me but something is there telling me He doesn't exist. I am still praying every night and I try to every morning before I do anything. I haven't been reading my Bible as much the last couple of nights but I always will attempt. I am repenting for my sins, I am realising when I have done something wrong and I know I should repent. But I still keep getting this thought that Jesus isn't real and I don't know what to do.
I thought I would come to this forum to talk about it because I don't know too many Christians in my personal life and I feel that maybe I can get a lot of different views and ideas on this matter.
Please, any response would be appreciated.

-Charlie Zeal
Click to expand...
You know Charlie,

I don't think it's the devil. Especially if your asking the question in the context of a Christian walk with God. This might have been a question that you always had deep down. I feel like God is bringing it back to the surface for you. Not because he is necessarily testing you or angry that you have this question, but I believe that it is a way of God wanting to reveal more of his character to you. Answering this hidden question is God's way of lovingly doing that to further your relationship with him. In a matter of fact, I think this same thing happened to me.
 
Z

ZealPlaysBass

New member
#14
Sep 2, 2021
6
0
1
#14
mindfulzen said:
You had better doublecheck then. And I think you would remember if you read John the baptists book, powerful stuff, so guess it is another one. God bless. Cool down a bit, you have time, you say you are 17
Click to expand...
Hi,

Yeah, I was on John but I'm now on Acts. I feel a bit disappointed that I couldn't remember off the top of my head what book I was on but it was John.

What did you mean by cool down, by the way?
 
Z

ZealPlaysBass

New member
#15
Sep 2, 2021
6
0
1
#15
DrGuyPhD said:
You know Charlie,

I don't think it's the devil. Especially if your asking the question in the context of a Christian walk with God. This might have been a question that you always had deep down. I feel like God is bringing it back to the surface for you. Not because he is necessarily testing you or angry that you have this question, but I believe that it is a way of God wanting to reveal more of his character to you. Answering this hidden question is God's way of lovingly doing that to further your relationship with him. In a matter of fact, I think this same thing happened to me.
Click to expand...
That is a very interesting point. After a few days, though, the feeling left me and I can safely say I feel much better, now. I was a bit concerned about it all, honestly, but I managed to get through it with the help of the Lord and Jesus Christ. Hopefully you got through it alright, too!
 
M

mindfulzen

Banned
#16
Aug 4, 2021
586
185
43
#16
ZealPlaysBass said:
Hi,

Yeah, I was on John but I'm now on Acts. I feel a bit disappointed that I couldn't remember off the top of my head what book I was on but it was John.

What did you mean by cool down, by the way?
Click to expand...
If you really are 17, you have like 65 years left to live, right? 65 years, that is plenty of time I would think. Cool down means to not be so serious. Because you have time to make mistakes yet. Be lighthearted still. God comes to you, and you have time to be young and make mistakes, so just go through it, make it what it is. Then you marry, make a family after finding God. You are not in a rush. Limit your life too much, you limit you ability to find God. Allow yourself to make mistakes and learn. Good luck.
 
Z

ZealPlaysBass

New member
#17
Sep 2, 2021
6
0
1
#17
When I was replying to this message, I deleted a couple big paragraphs because I realised what I said was already answered. Although I do, arguably, have a massive chunk of my life ahead of me, I cannot take this time for granted. I feel I should commit to God now until it is too late. I constantly make mistakes and I do learn from them but I feel like being to relaxed about the whole ordeal is the wrong way of looking at it. In fact, I feel I am to relaxed about mistakes I make sometimes and want to correct those mistakes. You are right in that making mistakes brings me closer to God but if I have already found God, should I not just try and avoid those mistakes as much as possible?
 
Magenta

Magenta

Senior Member
#18
Jul 3, 2015
60,135
29,452
113
#18
ZealPlaysBass said:
When I was replying to this message, I deleted a couple big paragraphs because I realised what I said was already answered. Although I do, arguably, have a massive chunk of my life ahead of me, I cannot take this time for granted. I feel I should commit to God now until it is too late. I constantly make mistakes and I do learn from them but I feel like being to relaxed about the whole ordeal is the wrong way of looking at it. In fact, I feel I am to relaxed about mistakes I make sometimes and want to correct those mistakes. You are right in that making mistakes brings me closer to God but if I have already found God, should I not just try and avoid those mistakes as much as possible?
Click to expand...
I like your attitude :) The fact of the matter is, nobody knows how much time they have. You are welcome for all the videos! I thought/hoped you might enjoy some of the modern praise and worship that I do :D There is plenty available... it was while I was going through the Alpha Course in 2004 that I realized I needed no more convincing of the Truth of God's revealed written Word. I believe it has been updated since then; I have seen the new series because I have been part of a church community that hosted Alpha. It is quite densely packed with history, info, facts, and Scripture, through lots of interviews with different people. I hope you benefit from watching it :D
 
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