A couple I am friends with and work with have found out they are expecting. What advice can I offer them?

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Sep 15, 2021
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#1
Hello. At my current job I quickly befriended a girl, and later I met her partner and he began working with us also. She's been off work, and had noticeably not been drinking or smoking. Her partner told me she's pregnant. They are not Christian and as such she is considering 'terminating' the baby, although her partner told me after meeting with medical professionals she is becoming increasingly hesitatant.

He is naturally stressed by the prospect of becoming a father (they are both in their early 20s) however, he is prepared to stick by his partner whatever she decides. They both have degrees, work full time, love each other, and have supportive parents.

What advice can I give them?
 

MatthewWestfieldUK

Well-known member
May 13, 2021
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#2
Instead of giving advice, offer experience.
Suggest that she meet other people with young children... to understand and the joys that are far greater than the initial challenges of change.
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
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#4
Chances are if you're here asking, then probably nothing. I don't imagine a married couple facing an unexpected pregnancy is going to be too keen to take advice from someone who's never been in the same situation before themselves.
The times I offer advice in things I haven't experienced is when I have witnessed, first hand, another going through it. That way I saw the reality of the experience, heard the thoughts and feelings of those going through it and had time to process it all. That way I have, at least, an indirect experience into all that people go through.
 

listenyoumustAll

Well-known member
Jul 22, 2021
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#5
Tell them congratulations,advise them Draw up a budget for caring for the baby on arrival ,.. Its time to start handling some responsibilities.
 

EternalFire

Well-known member
Jan 3, 2019
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#6
I would recommend to them that they watch the movie Unplanned.

 
Sep 15, 2021
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#7
I would recommend to them that they watch the movie Unplanned.

Thank you for sharing. I started crying watching it.

I would, however, simply alienate them showing them something like that. They are not pro-life.
 

listenyoumustAll

Well-known member
Jul 22, 2021
404
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#8
Thank you for sharing. I started crying watching it.

I would, however, simply alienate them showing them something like that. They are not pro-life.
If they are not pro-life . it will not be laid in account to you what they decide ..just tell them no abortion is the only option in God's sight then Go your way.
 

17Bees

Senior Member
Oct 14, 2016
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#9
If (IF) he or she asked you for your advice you should tell them what you believe. I believe he should consider her his wife regardless of ceremony. I believe he should step up to his responsibilities as a husband, a father to his child, and a leader to his family. I believe she should understand she is the mother of a child where responsibilities are arduous and hard to endure, but that the rewards for both are a legacy of life and a profound love they never knew existed. They together are embarking on a journey bigger than them both.

You tell them your own heart. But remember, you and I as Christians are separated from the world. Tassels called tzizit - spelled something like that - are worn by Jews according to Moses law to indicate the separation of spirit that God demands. This separation is in our hearts through the blood of Christ. So don't be afraid of your feelings about abortion or what you will say. The Holy Spirit will speak for you in that hour. Be fierce and resolute!
 
Sep 15, 2021
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#10
Sorry, I'm kind of panicking now. Can you please prayer for them, especially the mother and the child inside her?
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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Tennessee
#11
Hello. At my current job I quickly befriended a girl, and later I met her partner and he began working with us also. She's been off work, and had noticeably not been drinking or smoking. Her partner told me she's pregnant. They are not Christian and as such she is considering 'terminating' the baby, although her partner told me after meeting with medical professionals she is becoming increasingly hesitatant.

He is naturally stressed by the prospect of becoming a father (they are both in their early 20s) however, he is prepared to stick by his partner whatever she decides. They both have degrees, work full time, love each other, and have supportive parents.

What advice can I give them?
Tell them that God knitted the child that is in the womb.
 

listenyoumustAll

Well-known member
Jul 22, 2021
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#13
Sorry, I'm kind of panicking now. Can you please prayer for them, especially the mother and the child inside her?
Prayer is Good . being in agreement is another .. No matter how many prayers are said ..if the party involved is not in agreement it may not yield fruit . speak in love to them face to face .. The power is in the tongue of the believer to give life or death . breath life into their situation ..
 

mustaphadrink

Senior Member
Dec 13, 2013
1,987
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#15
Hello. At my current job I quickly befriended a girl, and later I met her partner and he began working with us also. She's been off work, and had noticeably not been drinking or smoking. Her partner told me she's pregnant. They are not Christian and as such she is considering 'terminating' the baby, although her partner told me after meeting with medical professionals she is becoming increasingly hesitatant.

He is naturally stressed by the prospect of becoming a father (they are both in their early 20s) however, he is prepared to stick by his partner whatever she decides. They both have degrees, work full time, love each other, and have supportive parents.

What advice can I give them?
I am what is billed as a silly person as I rarely take anything seriously. I would like to offer two pieces of wisdom. One is, I have 12 grandchildren from two to 18 years. They are super duper fun and God-given. it is never a dull moment when I am with them.

As I have taken the trouble to research abortion, I can assure you and anyone who wants to listen having your baby killed can be devastating. it is on record that women who have done this are suffering 20 years after the event. Some women break down in tears every time they see a little baby.

The baby is your flesh and blood so having it killed will mean a part of you dies with it.
 

EternalFire

Well-known member
Jan 3, 2019
659
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#16
Thank you for sharing. I started crying watching it.

I would, however, simply alienate them showing them something like that. They are not pro-life.
My pleasure. I encourage you to continue planting and watering. You may be surprised by what God can use to grow that which has been planted.

What then is Apollos? What is Paul? Servants through whom you believed, as the Lord assigned to each. I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth. He who plants and he who waters are one, and each will receive his wages according to his labor. For we are God's fellow workers. You are God's field, God's building (1 Corinthians 3:5-9).
 

TheLearner

Well-known member
Jan 14, 2019
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Brighton, MI
#17
Hello. At my current job I quickly befriended a girl, and later I met her partner and he began working with us also. She's been off work, and had noticeably not been drinking or smoking. Her partner told me she's pregnant. They are not Christian and as such she is considering 'terminating' the baby, although her partner told me after meeting with medical professionals she is becoming increasingly hesitatant.

He is naturally stressed by the prospect of becoming a father (they are both in their early 20s) however, he is prepared to stick by his partner whatever she decides. They both have degrees, work full time, love each other, and have supportive parents.

What advice can I give them?
Visit a Christian and Secular Bookstore and check out those books, Dvds on your phone.