Toxic femininity

[JTB]

So Chris Rock makes a joke at Jada Smith's expense. Will initially laughs at the joke, but when Jada shoots him a dirty look he then goes up and slaps Chris to "avenge her honor". Thus Will tossed away his career to appease his wife, not because he thought the offense was so great.

When we have a disagreement, my wife chimes in "happy wife happy life" to get her way. I know of many married couples for whom this saying gets used to win a debate. Basically it comes down to the woman saying "do it my way, or I will make your life unhappy".

Over recent years much has been said about "toxic masculinity". I think its time we add "toxic femininity" to the debate. How many times do we men submit to a woman, just because if we do not submit she will make our lives miserable? If that ain't a toxic relationship... and it needs to change.

 

[tstumf]

I’ve been studying this for a year. I think the best way we men can change things is to invite God into our lives to become the change we want to see such as Character changes that glorify God. Starting with our selves then our homes and shining out from there. It’s the bad apples and loudmouths that get the media attention . It starts with us men and getting ourselves oriented correctly with God as a beloved son of the heavenly Father , learning to be Gods student and son. Relationship with Christ rather than religion . It really does start there and I will out myself as being as much a failure at this just as much as any other man, husband and father. We have an epidemic of un-initiated men in the world. Boys who are walking around in men’s bodies. Man children ,men with a 12 year olds mentality in them and absent fathers who aren’t there to be the role model so Mother’s raising boys need their boys to have a masculine role model but Only masculinity bestows masculinity. A boy cannot get the affirmation he needs from a woman. Sadly many try and we get effeminate, passive and cowardly men or alternatively we get angry violent men who pass down their generational sins to the next generation.

 

[Live4Him2]

When we have a disagreement, my wife chimes in "happy wife happy life" to get her way. I know of many married couples for whom this saying gets used to win a debate. Basically it comes down to the woman saying "do it my way, or I will make your life unhappy".

How about we change this to "Happy spouse, happy house"?

 

[Carry_Your_Name]

Don’t be distracted by these cheap thrills, man. It’s a waste of time.

 

[2ndTimothyGroup]

"do it my way, or I will make your life unhappy".

Hilarious. Absolutely hilarious! Of course, I'm now single . . . which helps.

That is just so funny.

 

[Runningman]

So Chris Rock makes a joke at Jada Smith's expense. Will initially laughs at the joke, but when Jada shoots him a dirty look he then goes up and slaps Chris to "avenge her honor". Thus Will tossed away his career to appease his wife, not because he thought the offense was so great.

When we have a disagreement, my wife chimes in "happy wife happy life" to get her way. I know of many married couples for whom this saying gets used to win a debate. Basically it comes down to the woman saying "do it my way, or I will make your life unhappy".

Over recent years much has been said about "toxic masculinity". I think its time we add "toxic femininity" to the debate. How many times do we men submit to a woman, just because if we do not submit she will make our lives miserable? If that ain't a toxic relationship... and it needs to change.

"Toxic masculinity" is just a way to shame men for being normal men. There isn't really anything inherently toxic about normal men and women. This kind of language is just designed to destabilize societies. Adding more Orwellian politically correct new speech isn't really helping. How about we begin empowering men and women to be normal, as God created them, and to embrace that.

 

[Aaron56]

"happy wife happy life"

Is just an echo from the curse in the garden: "..thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee..."

This was echoed in Cain's curse: "And unto thee shall be his (sin's) desire, and thou shalt rule over him".

Essentially, woman will want to control man but man will have dominion over woman. Recall, it was man who threw woman under the bus: "It was the woman you gave me!".

So, yeah, that saying has no part in God's kingdom.

In Christ there is no schism between a man and a woman in marriage, they are one flesh. Marriage was given specifically to reveal the Lord's intent between the husband and wife. Man's side was opened to create the woman. The Lord's side was opened to insert the woman (the church) through the veil of His flesh. This shows that we who are in Christ are of Christ. A man shall give his own life up for the woman and love her and the woman will live wholly supplied and submitted to the care of her husband.

 

[JTB]

Hilarious. Absolutely hilarious! Of course, I'm now single . . . which helps.

That is just so funny.

I'm glad I was able to amuse you

 

[Lanolin]

mm I dont know

I thought the Bible did say about marriage that the married men and women care for the things of the world, how to please their wife or husband, while the unmarried care for things of the Lord.

so it does kinda go both ways.

I'd just suggest ppl pray for the will and jada if they that concerned. Though maybe Mr rock will reconsider his jokes after being slapped a few times.

oooh but the power of the angry stare! Thats gotta hurt.

 

[2ndTimothyGroup]

I'm glad I was able to amuse you

I apologize if you were offended. Very sorry.

 

[Avery]

So Chris Rock makes a joke at Jada Smith's expense. Will initially laughs at the joke, but when Jada shoots him a dirty look he then goes up and slaps Chris to "avenge her honor". Thus Will tossed away his career to appease his wife, not because he thought the offense was so great.

When we have a disagreement, my wife chimes in "happy wife happy life" to get her way. I know of many married couples for whom this saying gets used to win a debate. Basically it comes down to the woman saying "do it my way, or I will make your life unhappy".

Over recent years much has been said about "toxic masculinity". I think its time we add "toxic femininity" to the debate. How many times do we men submit to a woman, just because if we do not submit she will make our lives miserable? If that ain't a toxic relationship... and it needs to change.

Wrong on both sides. Bad attitudes all the way around. It's really time for husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church and wives respect your husbands.

Why is there a debate when Scripture is perfectly clear? I don't know how many times you 'submit' to your wife, but maybe it's time you both sit down and ask each other for forgiveness and then ask God for help in your situation, pray, study scripture and don't tell your wife to submit. Submission to the mindset you reveal would not be beneficial.

Woman submit is not the answer to a marriage.

 

[JTB]

I apologize if you were offended. Very sorry.

No, no offense taken. Being single I can imagine that the trials of the married might amuse!

 

[tourist]

So Chris Rock makes a joke at Jada Smith's expense. Will initially laughs at the joke, but when Jada shoots him a dirty look he then goes up and slaps Chris to "avenge her honor". Thus Will tossed away his career to appease his wife, not because he thought the offense was so great.

When we have a disagreement, my wife chimes in "happy wife happy life" to get her way. I know of many married couples for whom this saying gets used to win a debate. Basically it comes down to the woman saying "do it my way, or I will make your life unhappy".

Over recent years much has been said about "toxic masculinity". I think its time we add "toxic femininity" to the debate. How many times do we men submit to a woman, just because if we do not submit she will make our lives miserable? If that ain't a toxic relationship... and it needs to change.

I believe in 'Happy wife, happy life'. I find it best to each day nod your head 'yes' and to say that you're sorry.

 

[2ndTimothyGroup]

No, no offense taken. Being single I can imagine that the trials of the married might amuse!

Thank you for your understanding. And believe me . . . I have full sympathy for anyone undergoing such struggles. My marriage was horrific. It was amazing, the things that I did to serve my wife and her three children. I failed in that after putting them all first, and after they continued to disrespect me, I couldn't handle myself. I engaged in yelling matches, doing all that I could to defend myself. Incredibly, defending myself made me appear to be the "bad guy," and it only worked against me.

It is incredibly difficult to remain humble when you're being attacked, though you consider yourself not only be innocent, but a servant. And yet, isn't this the model that Peter asked that we follow, model, and imitate? I "get it" now, but I didn't "get it" back then. And even though I have grown tremendously since those relationships came to an end, I'm not sure that I could successfully take the beatings (both physical and emotional) much better than I did back then.

Paul was right when he suggested that we not be married, that in by remaining single, we would spare ourselves of many, many hardships.

I wish you well . . . my friend.

 

[JTB]

Wrong on both sides. Bad attitudes all the way around. It's really time for husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church and wives respect your husbands.

Why is there a debate when Scripture is perfectly clear? I don't know how many times you 'submit' to your wife, but maybe it's time you both sit down and ask each other for forgiveness and then ask God for help in your situation, pray, study scripture and don't tell your wife to submit. Submission to the mindset you reveal would not be beneficial.

Woman submit is not the answer to a marriage.

My wife and I are quite opposite when it comes to 'religion'. She's died and tied to Missouri Synod Lutheranism, I lean more towards 1 Corinthians 14 charismatic. I may not always heed the Bible in every aspect but when I violate it at least I acknowledge it. Her, any part of the Bible she doesn't like she ignores as if it doesn't even exist. So you can see where there might be some friction.

I think marriage should be a partnership, with the man being the head of the house having veto power. She's just flat out 'do it my way or pay the consequence'. We can sit all day and discuss the issues, but in the end, she's 'my way or the highway'. So to keep the peace (and demonstrate love) I go her way, even when I know it's wrong.

Her femininity is thus toxic. And I see it in many marriages/relationships, both Christian and secular. And this incident where Will Smith finds the joke funny, but then goes on the warpath to appease his woman, demonstrates it wonderfully.

 

[Avery]

My wife and I are quite opposite when it comes to 'religion'. She's died and tied to Missouri Synod Lutheranism, I lean more towards 1 Corinthians 14 charismatic. I may not always heed the Bible in every aspect but when I violate it at least I acknowledge it. Her, any part of the Bible she doesn't like she ignores as if it doesn't even exist. So you can see where there might be some friction.

I think marriage should be a partnership, with the man being the head of the house having veto power. She's just flat out 'do it my way or pay the consequence'. We can sit all day and discuss the issues, but in the end, she's 'my way or the highway'. So to keep the peace (and demonstrate love) I go her way, even when I know it's wrong.

Her femininity is thus toxic. And I see it in many marriages/relationships, both Christian and secular. And this incident where Will Smith finds the joke funny, but then goes on the warpath to appease his woman, demonstrates it wonderfully.

For sure marriage should be a partnership. I would be careful with veto power though. I saw the Will Smith thing and I don't blame his wife for not liking the remark, but his actions were over the top if they were even real. The debate seems to go on about that one.

I don't know about the particulars and you don't have to spell them out, but what would happen if you did not agree with her and let her have her way? Are these major issues or just irritable things? I would be more along the lines of Corinthians myself and my husband isn't, but we don't argue about things.

It sounds like you are becoming resentful and I can't blame you there and I will guess you have tried different things without success. When it comes down to it, sometimes the only person that can change in a stalemate situation is the person who wants it to change. And no, I do not think the answer is always letting her have her way.

 

[2ndTimothyGroup]

My wife and I are quite opposite when it comes to 'religion'. She's died and tied to Missouri Synod Lutheranism, I lean more towards 1 Corinthians 14 charismatic. I may not always heed the Bible in every aspect but when I violate it at least I acknowledge it. Her, any part of the Bible she doesn't like she ignores as if it doesn't even exist. So you can see where there might be some friction.

I think marriage should be a partnership, with the man being the head of the house having veto power. She's just flat out 'do it my way or pay the consequence'. We can sit all day and discuss the issues, but in the end, she's 'my way or the highway'. So to keep the peace (and demonstrate love) I go her way, even when I know it's wrong.

Her femininity is thus toxic. And I see it in many marriages/relationships, both Christian and secular. And this incident where Will Smith finds the joke funny, but then goes on the warpath to appease his woman, demonstrates it wonderfully.

Thank you for sharing these sensitive comments about your marriage and circumstances. I think that you're sharing the general status of many marriages and I'd say that your words are helpful for allowing "us" to reflect in a healthy way.

 

[JTB]

Thank you for sharing these sensitive comments about your marriage and circumstances. I think that you're sharing the general status of many marriages and I'd say that your words are helpful for allowing "us" to reflect in a healthy way.

Thank you for the kind words.

 

[Eli1]

I don’t know why we have so many words today that are just synonyms of synonyms.
“Toxic femininity“ or “toxic masculinity”.

That’s just called anger or being pissed off.

 

[kaylagrl]

So Chris Rock makes a joke at Jada Smith's expense. Will initially laughs at the joke, but when Jada shoots him a dirty look he then goes up and slaps Chris to "avenge her honor". Thus Will tossed away his career to appease his wife, not because he thought the offense was so great.

When we have a disagreement, my wife chimes in "happy wife happy life" to get her way. I know of many married couples for whom this saying gets used to win a debate. Basically it comes down to the woman saying "do it my way, or I will make your life unhappy".

Over recent years much has been said about "toxic masculinity". I think its time we add "toxic femininity" to the debate. How many times do we men submit to a woman, just because if we do not submit she will make our lives miserable? If that ain't a toxic relationship... and it needs to change.

I don't believe either side is toxic, I believe people should be held accountable for their own actions. And as much as my husband would try to stick up for me, I was single a lot of years, I can handle myself. Totally better way to handle that would have been to use some class when he won the Oscar. He could have brought attention to the disease and it would have been a totally different night. But as for calling her his "wife" I'm offended by that. She's admitted to cheating on her husband to the whole world. She belittles him whenever she gets the chance. And they say they have an "open marriage". Which we all know isn't marriage. If I shot my mouth off the way this guttersnipe has I would have expected my husband to have left me years ago. But it seems this arrangement of theirs is falling apart, shock, surprise, and Will lost his grip under pressure.

As to your own situation, have you gone for help? Never did like phrases like "happy wife, happy life". So many of these things people come up with are either stupid or make no sense. My husband and I make decisions together. We keep our lives private, especially our intimate lives. That means both friends and family. No jokes about it, totally private. But we married late in life and neither of us can stand arguing. I grew up with parents that never stopped arguing. So we keep the drama to a minimum. We respect and honor each other, we don't keep records of past upsets, which are few. So "happy spouses make happy houses", how about that?