About rules on Christian dating

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JohnB

JohnB

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#101
Jul 31, 2022
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#101
Dirtman said:
Maybe finding out who a person is, what their hopes dreams beliefs and plans are. To find out if they are a quality person. To do that with a clear mind not clouded with hormones.
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Yes you have to learn about the person first. Talk to family and friends and see what they think of the person you're interested in. They will see things you don't. Remember also, they could have their own biases too. Date one on one. see a movie and have dinner. Some people know how to kiss or show affection, some don't. There has to be some physical contact.
 
JohnB

JohnB

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#102
Jul 31, 2022
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#102
Webers.Home said:
.
Most people want love, romance, companionship, and a family of their own.
According to Gen 1:27-28, and Gen 2:21-24, those things are Divine
blessings, they're perfectly normal, nothing to be ashamed of; nor is there
anything intrinsically wrong or sinful about them. But a believer has to be self
controlled, and not permit romantic urges to make them lose their heads
and ruin their chances for happiness.

Adult dating is where it starts; and adult dating isn't harmless. It leads to
other things and it leads into rashly-made commitments and promises that
are not easily backed out of. The end result of adult dating is ultimately
marriage and children. Whose religion will prevail in the marriage? Whose
religion will be taught to the children? The believer's or the infidel's? And
ultimately, who will get the children's souls-- God, or the Devil?

For example:

• Gen 6:4 . .There were ambitious men on the earth in those days, and also
afterward, when the sons of God came in to the daughters of men, and they
bore children to them. Those were the mighty men who were of old, men of
renown.

The sons of God chose their wives solely on the basis of allure without any
spiritual prudence whatsoever. (Gen 6:1-2)

Theirs are a primo example of mixed marriages gone terribly awry. When
the Flood came, only Noah and his family survived. Why? Because neither
the sons of God, nor their impious women, nor their worldly posterity
heeded Jonah's preaching and came aboard the Ark with him. They all
stayed behind and got wiped out.

A similar fate befell at least two of Lot's daughters. They had married Sodom
men and when their dad came around warning his kin of the impending
destruction; they didn't listen; so guess what. Lot's daughters burned to death
right along with their Sodom husbands: Lot's grandchildren too, if any.
_
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The Sons of GOD were fallen angels. It shows they did have desires. Lots daughters were not burned. They escaped with Lot. Jonah wasn't about the ark.
 
D

Dirtman

Well-known member
#103
Jul 19, 2022
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#103
JohnB said:
Yes you have to learn about the person first. Talk to family and friends and see what they think of the person you're interested in. They will see things you don't. Remember also, they could have their own biases too. Date one on one. see a movie and have dinner. Some people know how to kiss or show affection, some don't. There has to be some physical contact.
Click to expand...
Yes one on one dating after a short time of in company dating os the next step.
 
JohnB

JohnB

Well-known member
#104
Jul 31, 2022
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#104
Dirtman said:
Yes one on one dating after a short time of in company dating os the next step.
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I agree with that, but some churches and Christians are against any one on one dating. That is not biblical Be careful if Christians use verses just to create guilt and fear.
 
J

jb

Senior Member
#105
Feb 27, 2010
4,940
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#105
Amanuensis said:
I don't date. I have never liked it since I got saved and filled with the Holy Spirit. It seems carnal and worldly.

I like rules, boundaries and fearing God and hating even the appearance of sin.

I would not be in a house alone with a woman who was interested in marrying me. I would not want people to think we were unconcerned about sexual purity. We need examples today. People who will say that it is NOT OK to fornicate.

Thinking you can fornicate and it's ok because we are all human and God forgives us, is not the mind of a born again Christian. I see too many young people in the church living together and not concerned about it. I don't believe they are saved yet. I don't care what anyone tells me, they are going to hell if they don't repent and quit it.

As far as dating and not having rules...Thinking you can suck face and get aroused and WANT to fornicate but just not do it is ok because you didn't actually go through with it is NOT OK.
The one who does that on the regular will wake up in hell with eternal regret if they don't repent of such a thing.

You have a different opinion I am sure but I have given you mine. Let the debate rage....

Hate sin, hate even the appearance of sin, don't give the flesh any opportunity, flee fornication, pray that you will not even ENTER into temptation because thinking you can handle it is your first mistake.

Don't play on the edge of disobedience thinking that God's mercy and grace will cover you if you fail Him. God's mercy and grace does not clear the unrepentant and guilty. Only those who repent and apply the blood of Christ from a sincere heart can trust in being saved from the wrath of a Holy God not those who willfully test His limits and presume upon his Grace.
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In the above post you use the word "hell" twice...

You appear to have a very hard manner and legalistic attitude!

But each to their own!
 
D

Dirtman

Well-known member
#106
Jul 19, 2022
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#106
JohnB said:
I agree with that, but some churches and Christians are against any one on one dating. That is not biblical Be careful if Christians use verses just to create guilt and fear.
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I know many churches are biblically retarded about the practical things of life. Which is why I'm glad of the Church I am in
We love marriage and family and advocate for young men and women to marry young ; to start a family. But we dont have any singles groups.
 
JohnB

JohnB

Well-known member
#107
Jul 31, 2022
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#107
Dirtman said:
I know many churches are biblically retarded about the practical things of life. Which is why I'm glad of the Church I am in
We love marriage and family and advocate for young men and women to marry young ; to start a family. But we dont have any singles groups.
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The Calvary Chapel I was at, did not encourage dancing. That was fine with me. I talked to a high school senior and she told me the high school has dance lessons. I said "WHAT?" She said the steps are placed on the floor, but students are not allowed to touch each other. They walk through the steps, but at a distance. I just shook my head. LOL
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#108
Mar 13, 2014
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#108
Dirtman said:
Maybe finding out who a person is, what their hopes dreams beliefs and plans are. To find out if they are a quality person. To do that with a clear mind not clouded with hormones.
Click to expand...
So wait until one is married before one's mind is clouded with hormones? No reason you cannot find out what a prospective mate's dreams, beliefs, and plans are when holding hands or cuddling on the couch.
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#110
Mar 13, 2014
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#110
JohnB said:
The Calvary Chapel I was at, did not encourage dancing. That was fine with me. I talked to a high school senior and she told me the high school has dance lessons. I said "WHAT?" She said the steps are placed on the floor, but students are not allowed to touch each other. They walk through the steps, but at a distance. I just shook my head. LOL
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Unreal.
 
JohnB

JohnB

Well-known member
#111
Jul 31, 2022
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#111
One thing I would tell people if they are going to have sex before marriage, count the cost. Not just spiritually, but to your life. If the other person has an STD, you could have it for life. Explain that to the woman you want to marry. If she becomes pregnant, you have a bond for life. You will be paying child support for the next 18 years, at least. This will affect every relationship you have for the rest of your life. Remember you also create a bond with their family too. If they have a nut in their family, they could make a mess of your's. Some of this could happen even after you're married. Count the cost.
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#112
Mar 13, 2014
41,534
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#112
JohnB said:
One thing I would tell people if they are going to have sex before marriage, count the cost. Not just spiritually, but to your life. If the other person has an STD, you could have it for life. Explain that to the woman you want to marry. If she becomes pregnant, you have a bond for life. You will be paying child support for the next 18 years, at least. This will affect every relationship you have for the rest of your life. Remember you also create a bond with their family too. If they have a nut in their family, they could make a mess of your's. Some of this could happen even after you're married. Count the cost.
Click to expand...
Exactly. Count the cost.
 
oyster67

oyster67

Senior Member
#113
May 24, 2014
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#113
gb9 said:
no, i mean the Old Testament book.


ever read it??
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Yes, I know all about Solomons life. I also know about his great fall.

Since you brought it up, I will let you tell us the story.
 
G

gb9

Senior Member
#114
Jan 18, 2011
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#114
oyster67 said:
Yes, I know all about Solomons life. I also know about his great fall.

Since you brought it up, I will let you tell us the story.
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the Song of Solomon , also called the Song of Songs, is a Old Testament book about the relationship between a man and a women.

you can read it for yourself. might be eye opening if you have never read it.
 
oyster67

oyster67

Senior Member
#115
May 24, 2014
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#115
gb9 said:
the Song of Solomon , also called the Song of Songs, is a Old Testament book about the relationship between a man and a women.

you can read it for yourself. might be eye opening if you have never read it.
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He had lots of lovers. Tell us what this lifestyle led him to at the end of life's little road. Would you like to emulate his life?
 
G

gb9

Senior Member
#116
Jan 18, 2011
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#116
oyster67 said:
He had lots of lovers. Tell us what this lifestyle led him to at the end of life's little road. Would you like to emulate his life?
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you are being obtuse.
i simply asked have you ever read the Song of Solomon.

that is a yes or no answer.
 
oyster67

oyster67

Senior Member
#117
May 24, 2014
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#117
gb9 said:
you are being obtuse.
i simply asked have you ever read the Song of Solomon.

that is a yes or no answer.
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o_O... Obtusity is an Oyster thing.

Tell us about how his life story of womanizing ended. :coffee:

.
 
Webers.Home

Webers.Home

Well-known member
#118
May 28, 2018
5,282
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cfbac.org
#118
.
Webers.Home said:
Theirs are a primo example of mixed marriages gone terribly awry. When
the Flood came, only Noah and his family survived. Why? Because neither
the sons of God, nor their impious women, nor their worldly posterity
heeded Jonah's preaching and came aboard the Ark with him. They all
stayed behind and got wiped out.
Click to expand...
Errata: Jonah's preaching was actually Noah's. (2Pet 2:5)
_
 
D

Dirtman

Well-known member
#119
Jul 19, 2022
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#119
tourist said:
So wait until one is married before one's mind is clouded with hormones? No reason you cannot find out what a prospective mate's dreams, beliefs, and plans are when holding hands or cuddling on the couch.
Click to expand...
Yes wait until you're married to cloud your mind hormones. Use your mind prior to determine if she is a match for you.
 
JohnB

JohnB

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#120
Jul 31, 2022
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#120
oyster67 said:
o_O... Obtusity is an Oyster thing.

Tell us about how his life story of womanizing ended. :coffee:

.
Click to expand...
For it was so, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned his heart after other gods; and his heart was not loyal to the LORD his God, as was the heart of his father David. For Solomon went after Ashtoreth the goddess of the Sidonians, and after Milcom the abomination of the Ammonites. Solomon did evil in the sight of the LORD, and did not FULLY follow the LORD, as did his father David. Then Solomon built a high place for Chemosh the abomination of Moab, on the hill that is east of Jerusalem, and for Molech the abomination of the people of Ammon. And he did likewise for all his foreign wives, who burned incense and sacrificed to their gods." 1 Kings 11:1-8
 
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