I love you

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J

Jullianna

Guest
#1
#1
I'm sure the "right time" varies by person and circumstance... But how many times do people say "I love you" when what they really mean is "I'm infatuated with you" or "I'm sexually attracted to you"? Before someone tells you that they love you, shouldn't they:

- have seen you without makeup or when you have a cold and your nose looks like Rudolph's
- know your passion for the Lord, your family, for your work and life in general
- understand how protective you are of the people you love and sometimes even those you don't
- have seen you angry or in an unguarded moment when you weren't on your best behavior
- have seen you do something incredibly stupid :) (and I'm sure I'm the only one who does stupid things, right? haha)

Don't get me wrong. I'm TOTALLY for romance and romantic gestures. I'm a fool for those things and they touch me deeply.. But..I just don't think you should tell someone you love them until you really do. The whole person. The REAL person. The good and the bad..and love the quirks just as much. Peeling back the layers is an incredibly loving, awesome process. :)

What say you?
 
I

ilavjesus

Guest
#2
#2
WOW...INCREDIBLE GIRL....THATS TRUE..
THATS WHY I HAVENT SAY ILOVE YOU 2 YEARS AGO...
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#3
May 23, 2009
16,761
5,661
113
#3
If only we could all find someone who would stick around long enough/be patient enough/interested enough to see us through those times...
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#4
#4
seoulsearch, two words -----> duct tape :) (handcuffs work too, but they leave marks)
 
A

allforfun

Guest
#5
#5
I think loving people through their bad moments is a defeat in and of itself. We want perfection.

When I am dating someone and have known them long enough that I trust they should know, I allow them to see the drawer of terror. Remember Monica's closet on Friends? She was neat and tidy but had the "closet". I have that drawer and if a man doesn't run screaming needing therapy afterwards, I can safely assume I can say "I love you" soon.
 
K

Kooper

Guest
#6
#6
Jullianna said:
I'm sure the "right time" varies by person and circumstance... But how many times do people say "I love you" when what they really mean is "I'm infatuated with you" or "I'm sexually attracted to you"? Before someone tells you that they love you, shouldn't they:

- have seen you without makeup or when you have a cold and your nose looks like Rudolph's
- know your passion for the Lord, your family, for your work and life in general
- understand how protective you are of the people you love and sometimes even those you don't
- have seen you angry or in an unguarded moment when you weren't on your best behavior
- have seen you do something incredibly stupid :) (and I'm sure I'm the only one who does stupid things, right? haha)

Don't get me wrong. I'm TOTALLY for romance and romantic gestures. I'm a fool for those things and they touch me deeply.. But..I just don't think you should tell someone you love them until you really do. The whole person. The REAL person. The good and the bad..and love the quirks just as much. Peeling back the layers is an incredibly loving, awesome process. :)

What say you?
Click to expand...
This might be the reason why I'm not gettin' into any shallow relationships with anyone. I would actually like the other person to know that I mean those words. And that is, only if, it ever does come to that state into the relationship. And that's only an if. I don't want to be one of those people who are going to look back into their marriage and think they've wasted time with that one someone. I want I love you to actually mean as God intends it to be. But then, this is coming from an inexperienced and naive little dreamer... So, *shrugs*
 
D

djness

Guest
#7
#7
I said I love you to a girl maybe...7 years ago. She said I love you back. That was after knowing her for a few years.

We never dated or aynthing though, just really good friends.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#8
Aug 2, 2009
24,653
4,316
113
#8
Jullianna said:
I'm sure the "right time" varies by person and circumstance... But how many times do people say "I love you" when what they really mean is "I'm infatuated with you" or "I'm sexually attracted to you"? Before someone tells you that they love you, shouldn't they:

- have seen you without makeup or when you have a cold and your nose looks like Rudolph's
- know your passion for the Lord, your family, for your work and life in general
- understand how protective you are of the people you love and sometimes even those you don't
- have seen you angry or in an unguarded moment when you weren't on your best behavior
- have seen you do something incredibly stupid :) (and I'm sure I'm the only one who does stupid things, right? haha)

Don't get me wrong. I'm TOTALLY for romance and romantic gestures. I'm a fool for those things and they touch me deeply.. But..I just don't think you should tell someone you love them until you really do. The whole person. The REAL person. The good and the bad..and love the quirks just as much. Peeling back the layers is an incredibly loving, awesome process. :)

What say you?
Click to expand...
If you wait until all that is out of the way, you might never say 'I Love You' to anyone, and the guy you're interested in might think he's wasting his time and move on.
 
C

christiancollegegirl

Guest
#9
#9
I haven't said the words 'I love you' to anyone in years.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#10
#10
allforfun said:
I think loving people through their bad moments is a defeat in and of itself. We want perfection.

When I am dating someone and have known them long enough that I trust they should know, I allow them to see the drawer of terror. Remember Monica's closet on Friends? She was neat and tidy but had the "closet". I have that drawer and if a man doesn't run screaming needing therapy afterwards, I can safely assume I can say "I love you" soon.
Click to expand...
HAHAHA! I loved Monica's "closet"! I don't have a closet, but I do refuse to make my bed. It's my one sloppy thing. :)
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#11
#11
zeroturbulence said:
If you wait until all that is out of the way, you might never say 'I Love You' to anyone, and the guy you're interested in might think he's wasting his time and move on.
Click to expand...
I've said it, but I've said it too soon. And I've heard it waaay too soon. I'm thinking that if a guy moves on, maybe he was meant to, ya know? Maybe it's just me, but if he's the one God wants me to be with, he wouldn't move on and neither would I. I dunno..

I'm with Kooper on this. I think far too many people say it too frequently and take it far too lightly. If you say it, ya gotta MEAN it because the other person will have decisions to make about it and they are trusting you to mean it.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#12
Aug 2, 2009
24,653
4,316
113
#12
Jullianna said:
I've said it, but I've said it too soon. And I've heard it waaay too soon. I'm thinking that if a guy moves on, maybe he was meant to, ya know? Maybe it's just me, but if he's the one God wants me to be with, he wouldn't move on and neither would I. I dunno..

I'm with Kooper on this. I think far too many people say it too frequently and take it far too lightly. If you say it, ya gotta MEAN it because the other person will have decisions to make about it and they are trusting you to mean it.
Click to expand...
This thread has actually produced a funny skit in my mind that I will have to reveal later. Its funny but has a point that might shed some light on the subject.
 
1

1still_waters

Guest
#13
#13
Husbands are called to love their wife as Christ loved the church. If a guy isn't sure he's willing to give his life for the gal, then he better not go saying I love you.
 
C

christiancollegegirl

Guest
#15
#15
I guess I should have said 'I haven't said it to a guy I was dating or talking to in years'.
 
G

GreenNnice

Guest
#17
#17
It's just not easy for guys to say 'I love you' after been married many years to their gal.
___
I've always found that odd, just a noté to the topic at hand.

You would think that long, years and years, those three words would roll out just as easy ad the Geico dog's.


---hey, Zere, can you post YouTube clip for me, for those unfamiliar with that dog. And why not go to my c.c. real name game thread and give people a clue, like my name has a liittle to do with a Disney movie, 'Angels In The Outfield?'

Just saying. As parker county Joe would say :D
 
G

GreenNnice

Guest
#18
#18
nanabean said:
Not even to your parents??? or the kids you were babysitting---cousins????? Come now...surely.........
Click to expand...
---

Nanabeaniana, I have said I love you to the talking dog on Geico commercials. Does that count?

-------
It's just not easy for guys to say 'I love you' after been married many years to their gal.
___
I've always found that odd, just a noté to the topic at hand.

You would think that long, years and years, those three words would roll out just as easy ad the Geico dog's.


---hey, Zere, can you post YouTube clip for me, for those unfamiliar with that dog. And why not go to my c.c. real name game thread and give people a clue, like my name has a liittle to do with a Disney movie, 'Angels In The Outfield?'

Just saying. As parker county Joe would say :D
 
F

Faeriecat

Guest
#19
#19
Jullianna said:
seoulsearch, two words -----> duct tape :) (handcuffs work too, but they leave marks)
Click to expand...
I've been told they make padded handcuffs ... no marks that way ... and no sticky residue ...
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#20
May 23, 2009
16,761
5,661
113
#20
Jullianna said:
seoulsearch, two words -----> duct tape :) (handcuffs work too, but they leave marks)
Click to expand...
But Jules, you've worked in law enforcement... If I tried this innocent little method of... let's call it "coral-ling" (isn't that the term they use for horses and livestock :)) and the guy protests (*SPOILSPORT!!*), wouldn't you then technically have to arrest me? (BOO! :mad:) Although a friend of mine once joked that I had enough attitude to start my own prison gang...
 
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