Christian Dating

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Mar 1, 2023
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#1
Hey guys. Just want to ask if anyone have tried online dating...and what your experiences as a Christian?
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
8,103
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#2
Run a forum search and you will find many, many conversations about this.

They all end the same. Some hate it, some love it, some don't care one way or the other, and nobody ever changes their mind about any of it.
 

cv5

Well-known member
Nov 20, 2018
18,155
7,208
113
#3
Hey guys. Just want to ask if anyone have tried online dating...and what your experiences as a Christian?
Online "dating". No we did not do that. We did online "marrying".
We met online, got engaged. Waited 7 years, then got married.
And consummated the marriage AFTER the ceremony.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,173
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#4
TMI

sorry

Its the only way to set up a date thes days cos people dont go door knocking or serenading outside your window anymore. But its not even online these days its Wi-Fi enabled.

And people dont call it 'surfing the internet' anymore.
What you do is instead of a church directory ringing everybody on the telephone tree or whatever, you just get everyone on whats app, then do a group chat and say, singles meet up here.

This will weed out those who dont have a smartphone.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,173
113
#5
Then you say, every sunday after church service we goin to hang out at Wendys.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,173
113
#7
The date for you is the one who offers to pay for your $5 value meal.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,243
16,252
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69
Tennessee
#8
Online "dating". No we did not do that. We did online "marrying".
We met online, got engaged. Waited 7 years, then got married.
And consummated the marriage AFTER the ceremony.
Same here but only waited 7 weeks rather than 7 years. What was the reason for such a long wait before getting married. Regarding the time of the consummation, I prefer to keep the particulars to myself.
 

cv5

Well-known member
Nov 20, 2018
18,155
7,208
113
#9
Same here but only waited 7 weeks rather than 7 years. What was the reason for such a long wait before getting married. Regarding the time of the consummation, I prefer to keep the particulars to myself.
Family matters pertaining to the care of the elderly. Then executor matters, which I was. And much much more.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,243
16,252
113
69
Tennessee
#10
Family matters pertaining to the care of the elderly. Then executor matters, which I was. And much much more.
It all worked out for you and your wife, and ultimately for the glory of God. Your wife sounds like a keeper for sure and well worth waiting for.
 

cv5

Well-known member
Nov 20, 2018
18,155
7,208
113
#11
It all worked out for you and your wife, and ultimately for the glory of God. Your wife sounds like a keeper for sure and well worth waiting for.
The executor part was nasty. Like swimming with sharks with a three day old tuna strapped to your behind.
 

Gojira

Well-known member
Jul 20, 2021
5,668
2,295
113
Mesa, AZ
#12
Hey guys. Just want to ask if anyone have tried online dating...and what your experiences as a Christian?
It SUCKS.

For me, at least... very few women ever responded to my contacts. I mean, very few. Like, I could count them on one hand few. Out of that, I got one platonic date. After saying she'd to hang out again, and staying in intermittent contact, within two months she forgot about me. I know this because she told me precisely that. Nice girl.

eHarmony sucks. A host of others I've tried perform likewise.

There are Christians who've had success on those things. I know of a few.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,173
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#13
what?! Executor?

Did you execute someone in your family? Why do they call it that. Sounds horrible.
I would never want to be an executor and kill someone off.

Ok I do weeding in the library but I give the books a rest and a better home, I dont deliberately kill them.
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
3,645
2,865
113
#14
Hey guys. Just want to ask if anyone have tried online dating...and what your experiences as a Christian?
Not tried dating sites. Hate that idea. But I have, and am, dating online by meeting people casually and that developing into a relationship. Can't say it's been any worse than dating off line.
My current gf of 3 years I met online. 😊
 

melita916

Senior Member
Aug 12, 2011
10,415
2,659
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#15
I never used a dating site. I was too nervous about it lol! But I did meet someone online. We were friends for months before meeting in person. We got married 2 years later.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,173
113
#16
In the olden days people used to have penpals. You might never get to meet your penpal but it was kind of cool getting mail with different stamps from all over the world.

People used to write love letters too. but that seems to have stopped. Anyway I guess we have to move with the times communication wise. Its much faster these days which can be a good thing (or bad) however you will never really be close to someone unless you physically move in and live together in the same house (or tent or whatever! )
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,173
113
#17
Warning a lot of free online dating sites can be scams even if they are labelled christian
But those you pay money for can also be scammy.

So I would exercise caution. Dont expect too much as millions of other people from the world over want to meet their someone too. You will have to do a lot of backgroud checks and screening. Nobody is going to do it for you necessarily, because the matchmakers are just algorithims, not actual real people.
 

MsMediator

Well-known member
Mar 8, 2022
946
600
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#18
Dating in general, including online dating, is very competitive because men generally look for women within a certain age range (but has to meet other criteria as well, such as attractiveness, wife-material, can bring in an income, etc.), and women generally look for the "top" tier of guys based on status/looks. This is based on dating research data.

Recently an Uber driver (mid-30s) was telling me he dislikes women treating 40 as the new 20, because that doesn't work with the biological clock. He was saying men who want children have limited options nowadays as a result. He (and also a guy friend I know) want educated women who will bring in an income. I think that is the problem, guys want youth, looks, AND education, and income potential. Education/income is more of a criteria now for educated maybe all guys (before I don't think it mattered). This particular Uber driver was Indian. He was saying some of his friends are looking into marrying women from Colombia or India, but he personally isn't interested in that because marrying that way brings a different set of problems.

Bottom line is, both men and women, Christians included, are looking for someone who meets all their checkboxes, so this makes things complicated. I definitely had more attention online when I was younger, I have way less views on my profile now because I am over the age range guys seek.
 

MsMediator

Well-known member
Mar 8, 2022
946
600
93
#19
At the same time, the good news is that you only need to find one person.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
8,103
113
#20
Bottom line is, both men and women, Christians included, are looking for someone who meets all their checkboxes, so this makes things complicated. I definitely had more attention online when I was younger, I have way less views on my profile now because I am over the age range guys seek.
On the other hand you are also not stuck with a jerk of a guy who treats you like crud under the fridge.

"You get what you advertise for." I know some people who try WAY too hard to put on an appearance they think the opposite gender wants. Then they complain about all the dates they get, because they are not what they were looking for.

I have decided it's better to just be yourself. Sure you may never get anyone at all, but if you do find someone it will be someone who loves YOU, not the false front you have been advertising.

"So how's that working out for you Lynx? Found a girl yet?"

Nope. But if I do find someone, I'll know she's not attracted by a fake face I can't maintain.