can you guys post something funny please?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,492
5,428
113
*GG starts reading and naturally, the original song's tune is playing in her head as she bobs her head around , shoulders, arms and fist start bobbing around when she reads "WHAM POW! you've saved he day!"...
She adds on:"You other villains best run away"
This was genius!!

I'm actually terrible at poetry, and I was trying to think of a better line to round it out with, but GG obviously came in and showed us how it should be done! :cool:
 

Godsgirl1983

Well-known member
Feb 2, 2023
1,717
1,048
113
I don't know if you've ever heard of or used Waze, the GPS app, but occasionally they feature really fun guest voices for narrating your trip. A while back, they had "Batman" as a navigation choice and you could choose between Batman and The Riddler as your voice host.

The really cool thing is that they got Kevin Conroy, the original voice actor for Batman the Animated Series, to do the Batman voice for the Waze app as well.

I tried "Batman" for a while, but as you might have guessed, I gravited more towards The Riddler (since at heart, I am naturally more of a mischievous villain.) :geek::cool:

When certain directions would come up, The Riddler would tell you things like, "Take the round-a-bout. It's Bat-free." :ROFL:
When GPS tells you to go straight, but you can't because there is a lake there:

GPS BATMAN: continue straight ahead

You think: "well, there is a lake here but Batman said to do it so... here goes!"

GPS BATMAN: Oh good citizen! Why did you drive off into a lake?! I'm not real! I can't save you!"

 

Godsgirl1983

Well-known member
Feb 2, 2023
1,717
1,048
113
My wife is a bargain hunter and she finds some good deals online. We were using the GPS to get to the address in Myrtle Beach. No kidding...for about 3 miles, every quarter mile the voice on the GPS said...in a quarter mile, go straight. The system must have thought SC gives driver's licenses to kindergarteners.
The other day ours actually said (and I kid you not!)
continue straight ahead then turn off the road"
Our kids were ROLLING :LOL::LOL::ROFL:

to go straight took us under the interstate.
We're used to hearing things like "turn right onto Maple street" or even just "turn right"
nope, it said "turn off the road" :LOL:
which happened to be an alley and took us in the back lot to where we were going which was quicker and easier.
Usually GPS zig zags us around and out of the way.
 

Godsgirl1983

Well-known member
Feb 2, 2023
1,717
1,048
113
A SOK sounds like it'd land on a chin, a POW on the kisser, and a BLAP! might land on, idk, either the gut or a cheek, it seems to me that a BIFF! would land right on the nose.
:LOL::LOL: I never thought about the sounds being representative of the body part it hits :LOL:
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
19,184
6,606
113
62
It has to do with choosing quick, simple, and relatively cheap meals. A pot of chili, tacos, spaghetti, breakfast for dinner, make your own subs, one pot pizza.
Leftovers are key. Make extra for dinner and you have lunches all week.
 

Godsgirl1983

Well-known member
Feb 2, 2023
1,717
1,048
113
It has to do with choosing quick, simple, and relatively cheap meals. A pot of chili, tacos, spaghetti, breakfast for dinner, make your own subs, one pot pizza.
Leftovers are key. Make extra for dinner and you have lunches all week.
Darn :(
I thought you were going to have a secret I didn't already know/use ;)
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,492
5,428
113
As a sign of respect, I wouldn't want to say anything out loud during that 1/2 hour... But you might hear me quietly typing away on a keyboard. :geek::D:cool:(Hopefully we'll be allowed to have laptops in heaven!)
We won't need them as we will know everything. No more WiFi/computer rage.
Hi @BillG,

I'm about to nerd out, so please forgive me and feel free to skip over this post if it's too long.

I have often wondered about things like this. Will we just know everything instantly, or will eternity also mean a state of eternal learning? After all, Adam and Eve didn't know everything when they were created in the garden -- or at least, they didn't seem to know the dire consequences of eating from the wrong tree. And we would hope that if they had known, they certainly wouldn't have made the wrong choice.

A quick Google search says there are over 7,000 known languages in use, and apparently that doesn't even include "dead" languages like Latin. Will there just be one universal language in heaven, or will we automatically know all 7,000+ languages? If not, will we be spending our time learning them? Will the people who were gifted as translators on earth still work as translators in heaven? Will there be technology like the things they are coming up with now, offering instant translation in any language?

When Jesus appeared to His disciples after the resurrection, they thought He was a ghost, but to prove to them that He was living, He asked for something to eat -- and He ate a piece of broiled fish (Luke 24.)

Will we eat in heaven? I tend to think so, as Adama and Eve ate before the fall. Will we have refrigerators? Will there be a need for them? Will food go bad in heaven? Will we cook? I'm assuming it won't be over simple camp fires if we do. Will we have some kind of powers where we can automatically cook the food with our minds? Maybe so. But if for some reason, we need machines to cook and store our food, if we have refrigerators on earth that keep track of what we've used, and tell us what we need to buy, how much more advanced will they be in heaven? And will they keep advancing? Or will they already be in a perfect state with no need for further creativty or innovation?

I'm assuming heaven is a big place. If I want to travel from one side of heaven to another to visit a beloved friend, will I be able to transport like in a sci-fi movie? Will there be a need for transportation in heaven, like on earth? If so, who will design the things we need to get from here to there? Or will we be like the angels and just fly to wherever we need to go?

Jesus said that in His Father's house, there are many rooms -- that He will one day take us to to dwell in. Who is building these rooms? God Himself? Will they all be the same? I imagine not. One look at life on earth, and you can tell God likes variety. Will they need updating? Will they be carefully planned out, and the built?

I've read accounts of people who have supposedly visited heaven and while I don't put much stock into them because they can't be verified until we get there, it's been said that people in heaven were doing the same things as people on earth, such as building buildings. I have family members who have designed and had several houses built. Back then, everything was done on paper. Nowadays, they have computer programs that can show you what everything will look like before you've even bought the land. How much more advanced would this be in heaven!

One of my favorite stories in the Bible is when God specifically names two craftsman He wants to work on His temple Bezalel and Oholiab -- Exodus 36) -- because He himself gave them the knowledge of creativity and design in specific areas. Was the knowledge only for their lives on earth, or are they continuing to design in heaven?

I've often wondered what God will use technology-minded people's gifts for in heaven. Maybe they will do something else completely, or maybe there will be a glorified version of "heavenly tech work" that they will continue and add on to once they get there.

I don't know. I've read the Bible through about 7 times and have studied it since childhood, so if I'm missing something, please feel free to point out any passages that might answer these questions.

My Grandpa was from an age where he remembered the first time their house had electricity. He was in high school, and saw the lights on at their home for the very first time as he was approaching the house. Understandably, my Grandpa liked things he was familiar with, and wanted nothing to do with modern technology. (Even though, at the time, electricity was very much modern technology!)

His only phone was one that was attached to the wall with a cord. I myself resisted getting a smart phone for the longest time, until a friend convinced me. Now I find it a necessity. When a family member had an emergency last week, I went to pick up some things they needed and could instantly send pictures of everything they had, allowing my family to choose what they needed on the spot without making a separate trip or dragging them to the store.

Will we have a need for things like phones in heaven, or when we want to communicate with someone, will we somehow automatically be able to telepathically tune in to each other's thoughts? I don't know. And if there IS technology in heaven, what about people like my Grandpa? Will he automatically just want/know how to upgrade, or is he asking God for old-time versions of the things he was familiar with?

I myself like the actual act of typing on a real keyboard. The old-fashioned part of me misses phones with real buttons because I find the tactile sense of pushing a raised button that makes a click to be very therapeutic. I wouldn't mind being able to continue that in heaven.

I realize heaven is going to be far beyond anything we could ever dream or imagine. Perhaps there won't be a need for anything we have on earth, and surely any versions of things here that might exist will surpass anything we could ever think of.

As for me... I wonder how God would react to my request for a simple keyboard and ability to communicate with people through it.

After all, there is always something in most people that wants to hang on to at least a few things from the past that they prefer.

I know there won't be a need for those things in heaven, but I'll be very curious to see how God handles this aspect of humanity, since I'm assuming it might be part of how we were created.

Thank you for your very thought-provoking post! :)
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,492
5,428
113
Also, half my kids eat Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and the other half eat Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday.
Since Sunday is mysteriously missing from this roster, I'm guessing this is the day your kids go on a fast.

😳😬🤣

Now we know Cameron's REAL secret to saving on groceries! 😎
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
19,184
6,606
113
62
Since Sunday is mysteriously missing from this roster, I'm guessing this is the day your kids go on a fast.

😳😬🤣

Now we know Cameron's REAL secret to saving on groceries! 😎
Actually, we eat out on Sunday. Taco Bell has good deals online and Wendy's usually has good deals.
Simply fasting from something has little value. Fasting in a way to loosen bands and break bonds is greatly pleasing to God.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,590
17,056
113
69
Tennessee
When GPS tells you to go straight, but you can't because there is a lake there:

GPS BATMAN: continue straight ahead

You think: "well, there is a lake here but Batman said to do it so... here goes!"

GPS BATMAN: Oh good citizen! Why did you drive off into a lake?! I'm not real! I can't save you!"

Superman would not misled you like Batman. Of course, he would tell you to fly across the lake.
 

Mem

Senior Member
Sep 23, 2014
7,159
2,174
113
...I just realized why Robin's BIFF only had one F :unsure: He's only working with half the force in his punches that Batman has.

Robin would complete the Batman GPS and interject, "holy bad advice, Batman! There's a lake ahead!"

Or a Penguin alert, "waugh! ...waugh, waugh..."
Or Catwoman, "Somebody say fish? Mee...ow"

Please, somebody! Turn off my nerd mode?
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,492
5,428
113
Please, somebody! Turn off my nerd mode?
Lol!!

Years ago, my brother and his friend played some video game at our house all weekend -- all day Friday thru all day Sunday -- and they kept doing something in the game that caused the roughest, toughest, manliest of computerized voices to keep announcing, "NODE ACTIVATED!!!"

I would get up in the morning hearing, "NODE ACTIVATED!"

I would be 2 rooms away, and still hear a resounding, "NODE ACTIVATED!!"

Now thanks to @Mem, I'm going to walk around with a voice in my head saying, "NERD ACTIVATED!!!" :ROFL::ROFL::ROFL:

Which is oh so fitting for me, but... Do I really need a huge booming voice to remind me of it??! :geek::geek::geek::LOL::ROFL:
 
Apr 29, 2012
1,181
821
113
I am still using the Dell my daughter had given to her dad the Christmas before he passed, and never got around to using. He said he was going to do that (set the laptop up for himself) after he tidied his room. Oy, he shoulda tidied his room! I wonder what kind of mess I am going to leave behind. *Cartoon thought bubble bursts* Any who... Yeah, this Dell computer has etched keys that light will shine through, so nothing rubs off, ever! It is a nice feature of this laptop... My HP laptops had letters missing for sure... And my first laptop, a ten-inch touch screen Asus I think? Some of the bottom row keys stopped working entirely. Ugh. Like, the Z, X, C, V, B. Can't even copy and paste with those gone!
I have and sometimes use my first desktop that's running windoze xp because it has a full liscensed version of Photoshop with a calibrated monitor. Slow as a snail but the results are super good.