How Much Time, Effort, and Money Do We Put Into a Body That's Dying Anyway? (Replacing a Tooth?) All Are Welcome to Answer.

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,056
5,032
113
#1
Hey Everyone,

I was debating on whether to post this in Singles or the Family Forum, because I'd really like to hear answers from a variety of people -- married, single and looking, or single and content.

"How Much Time, Effort, and Money Do We Put into a Body That's Dying Anyway?" is a subject that has an inumerable amount of angles, and is something I contemplate more and more as I get older. Where is the line between taking Godly care of our bodies, and just plain vanity?

I think there's an added curve thrown in when you're single and still have a hope of possibly meeting someone. Let's be honest -- if you're single and hoping to attract a spouse, looks do matter -- sometimes ESPECIALLY to Christians, because they are told God only wants THE BEST for them (and for many, they believe that includes looks.) As for myself, I can only work on me to the best of what God enables me, and if it's God's will, maybe meet someone else who is doing the same.

One thing I ponder is if I encounter health problems in the future (though I try to be proactive in staying healthy,) my decisions of which treatments, or whether I have any at all, would all depend on my situation, budget, and how it would affect my family. We could go down the most serious rabbit holes like cancer or chronic illness, but I wanted to present an example of something I recently observed.

I know someone who recently had to have a tooth pulled and decided not to replace it. It was towards the middle of the mouth, didn't show, and wasn't going to cause any problems if left unfilled. This person has been married for many decades, so I don't know if they would have chosen to save up to replace it if it was visible (and would have been considered unattractive to their spouse.)

Now of course, in today's economy, it might be impossible to save up for that kind of work.

But I couldn't help contemplating what I would do if I were in this situation, because, as the title says, I often wonder where the line is between God's command to care for our bodies -- and just being vain.

After all, this body is already dying, and it could be argued that the money used to replace a tooth could be given to the church or a Godly charity instead.

We all know the story of the woman who anointed Jesus with the perfume that cost a year's wages, and how Judas, his betrayer said, "What a waste! This could have been sold and given to the poor!" (John 12:5) But we also know that in this situation, serving Jesus was of utmost priority.

I'm certainly not someone special or important -- just your average everyday sinner -- but for whatever reason, Judas' words have alway stuck with me my entire life -- "Couldn't this money be used to help others, rather than to feed my own vanity?" And it's something I contemplate through many of my own self-care decisions.

Where do YOU feel the line is? Let's say that you lost a tooth and had or could save up the money -- would you choose to replace it?

* Does it matter if it's visible or not visible? What if people would see a big gap when you talk or smile? What if it would be far enough back that it was hidden and couldn't be easily seen?

* Let's say the gap would be visible and very noticeable.
* Would it matter more if you were married and your spouse would be looking at it all the time?
* Would it matter more if you were single and trying to attract a spouse?
* Would it matter any less if you were alone, happy with being alone, and saw yourself as always being alone?

*If the gap would be in the back, where no one could see, and wouldn't cause any problems -- would you leave the gap, or still get a crown? Would any of the above factors (married, single but looking, lifetime single) affect your decision if the gap couldn't be seen?

* If the gap WAS NOT visible, would it be better to give the money to church/charity rather than spending it on a crown?

* If the gap WAS visible, would you still be willing to give the money away instead of getting it filled?

After all, how much do we spend on a body that's steadily dying anyway?
 

Mem

Senior Member
Sep 23, 2014
6,869
1,982
113
#2
I wish I could replay the series of shorts I listened to today since they've been so coincidentally with the subject matter that I've encountered checking into cc. I wish I could replay them because I'm too apt to mess up the recount.

One was of Jordan Peterson who was in tears speaking of the difficulties men encounter finding someone, and their loss at even knowing how to begin to. And, addressing women's finicky selectiveness, he said, "...be picky" he shrugged, "...I guess that's your thing..., but..." he continued while choking back the tears unsuccessfully as he wiped them away, and returned to the subject of malekind's perspective, "...they're just so derided."

Then another one was of Anthony Hopkins who advised, "Spend money." "Don't be afraid to spend $100 (on I forget what, a steak or something, I think) ... Spent $1000 on a vacation.... More money will be made but that moment will be gone forever.

I think these two provide examples both of a lesson in vanity and one of loving money more than anything else.
That is, to tie it into the woman with the perfume, she didn't care what any of them thought of her as much as she was concerned to express her own regard for Jesus specifically.

So, I'll say, if you've got it, don't be afraid to spend it if you'd like. And if you don't? Well, I don't know how much of a loss that makes him if he only loved you for your teeth.

But, of course, there's nothing wrong with caring for yourself as much as you care for others, even if, maybe especially, you're currently the only one that's in charge of the challenge of tending to your needs. I don't think that is as much self-serving as it is self-preserving.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
26,297
8,733
113
#3
I just got a tooth pulled last Wednesday, as a matter of fact. See, I was stubborn and didn't listen to my mama, so my teeth are a lost cause at this point. If I had my life to live over again... But I don't. So I get them pulled as they go bad, and eventually I will be down to zero teeth and I'll get dentures.

What are teeth made for? What are we using them for? Do we replace them to look good or to chew food better? (For people who don't even bother chewing, does it really matter how many teeth you have?)

Maintaining teeth for appearance is actually a regional thing. I hear people in some countries, even some countries with quite advanced technology and medicine, think we americans are strange for putting so much money into maintaining a pretty smile. They consider it unnatural for an elderly person to have a mouth full of (apparently) perfect teeth - kind of like we would look askance at a 90 year old woman with a recent boob job and face lift. It just doesn't look right because it doesn't fit the rest of the picture.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
26,297
8,733
113
#4
To the larger question of our bodies in general - remember that movie "It's About Time"? Kind of like that.

We spend time and effort to make money. When we spend that money to fix what breaks in our bodies, we are buying time and restored functionality. The older we get, the more that time and functionality costs. And of course we really can't do much past a certain point. We will inevitably die someday.

Maybe that's what the Bible means when it talks about considering everything we have in life to be already lost. We'll lose it someday, and if we keep trying to hold onto it anyway we just get frustrated and waste our resources. Might as well accept that we will lose it someday and enjoy it while we got it.

Of course there are bounds of reason on this philosophy. If my heart is about to get choked out, do please go ahead and put a stent in that vein. But always keep in mind the balance between what we are putting into the effort to keep our bodies going versus the value of living a couple more (possibly miserable) years.
 
Jul 7, 2022
9,467
3,888
113
Almost Heaven West Virginia
#5
Hey Everyone,

I was debating on whether to post this in Singles or the Family Forum, because I'd really like to hear answers from a variety of people -- married, single and looking, or single and content.

"How Much Time, Effort, and Money Do We Put into a Body That's Dying Anyway?" is a subject that has an inumerable amount of angles, and is something I contemplate more and more as I get older. Where is the line between taking Godly care of our bodies, and just plain vanity?

I think there's an added curve thrown in when you're single and still have a hope of possibly meeting someone. Let's be honest -- if you're single and hoping to attract a spouse, looks do matter -- sometimes ESPECIALLY to Christians, because they are told God only wants THE BEST for them (and for many, they believe that includes looks.) As for myself, I can only work on me to the best of what God enables me, and if it's God's will, maybe meet someone else who is doing the same.

One thing I ponder is if I encounter health problems in the future (though I try to be proactive in staying healthy,) my decisions of which treatments, or whether I have any at all, would all depend on my situation, budget, and how it would affect my family. We could go down the most serious rabbit holes like cancer or chronic illness, but I wanted to present an example of something I recently observed.

I know someone who recently had to have a tooth pulled and decided not to replace it. It was towards the middle of the mouth, didn't show, and wasn't going to cause any problems if left unfilled. This person has been married for many decades, so I don't know if they would have chosen to save up to replace it if it was visible (and would have been considered unattractive to their spouse.)

Now of course, in today's economy, it might be impossible to save up for that kind of work.

But I couldn't help contemplating what I would do if I were in this situation, because, as the title says, I often wonder where the line is between God's command to care for our bodies -- and just being vain.

After all, this body is already dying, and it could be argued that the money used to replace a tooth could be given to the church or a Godly charity instead.

We all know the story of the woman who anointed Jesus with the perfume that cost a year's wages, and how Judas, his betrayer said, "What a waste! This could have been sold and given to the poor!" (John 12:5) But we also know that in this situation, serving Jesus was of utmost priority.

I'm certainly not someone special or important -- just your average everyday sinner -- but for whatever reason, Judas' words have alway stuck with me my entire life -- "Couldn't this money be used to help others, rather than to feed my own vanity?" And it's something I contemplate through many of my own self-care decisions.

Where do YOU feel the line is? Let's say that you lost a tooth and had or could save up the money -- would you choose to replace it?

* Does it matter if it's visible or not visible? What if people would see a big gap when you talk or smile? What if it would be far enough back that it was hidden and couldn't be easily seen?

* Let's say the gap would be visible and very noticeable.
* Would it matter more if you were married and your spouse would be looking at it all the time?
* Would it matter more if you were single and trying to attract a spouse?
* Would it matter any less if you were alone, happy with being alone, and saw yourself as always being alone?

*If the gap would be in the back, where no one could see, and wouldn't cause any problems -- would you leave the gap, or still get a crown? Would any of the above factors (married, single but looking, lifetime single) affect your decision if the gap couldn't be seen?

* If the gap WAS NOT visible, would it be better to give the money to church/charity rather than spending it on a crown?

* If the gap WAS visible, would you still be willing to give the money away instead of getting it filled?

After all, how much do we spend on a body that's steadily dying anyway?

I woke up and can't get back to sleep because I forgot to refresh the scent repellent on some grapes in my yard. I want to eat those grapes instead of letting them go to the animals as sometimes happens. From that I'll maybe be tired today because I only got 2 hours sleep the night before. It's an ounce of prevention to save the food that I need to recover. That's just a current illustration that goes with your subject. However, I need the sleep so everything is a trade off. Especially when I forgot to tend to the vines earlier .

Nobody is perfect and we all have challenges from time to time. Right now I have found that my motivation is to recover from my current health challenges is so I can be used to bless more people. I'm trying to not focus on myself and what I can't change, so I can think clearly and sleep, so recovery takes place. Knowing our time here is short, I decided to do what I can to bless others with the gospel until death. That might happen sooner if I disregard my health. I'm a believer that God will extend our lives for a number of reasons. If I have more time and it's not in a confined situation, then I can reach more people.

The past months I lost a lot of hair, my nails are thinner than they've ever been and I'm recovering from a temporary heart condition. I had some concern about the possibility of turbo cancer and a host of other issues.
I thank God that it was not cancer and that I did not go to an oncologist to check it out. The Dr would have done a lot of harm.
The Lord has been my strength and will continue to help me with these until I'm well.

That said, I regard health very important because I've been temporarily crippled and seriously injured a number of times. God had healed me and gotten me back to strength again all of those many times. Being crippled or someone who has declining dental health is not a good situation. If someone notices a problem, getting to the root cause of decline is where to start. The root cause needs to be corrected, then the healing can begin.

Sorry that doesn't really address the comments about your friend's tooth and relationship, but it's something that was on my mind right now, my friend. I'm preaching to myself.
🍵🙂🙏
 

MsMediator

Well-known member
Mar 8, 2022
1,029
658
113
#6
I think it is fine to spend money on your body to fit in with society (and even within your own family) as long as it is not extreme. If teeth are really crowded or misaligned, or if someone has a missing front tooth, I think it is fine to fix them. A small gap may not be worth fixing. If someone is very hairy, it may be worthwhile to do spend money on waxing or hair removal treatments. I lived in an area where you don't show your toes unless they are painted. So, for spring and summer months, pedicures were necessary in order to wear toeless shoes.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,056
5,032
113
#7
Then another one was of Anthony Hopkins who advised, "Spend money." "Don't be afraid to spend $100 (on I forget what, a steak or something, I think) ... Spent $1000 on a vacation.... More money will be made but that moment will be gone forever.

I think these two provide examples both of a lesson in vanity and one of loving money more than anything else.
That is, to tie it into the woman with the perfume, she didn't care what any of them thought of her as much as she was concerned to express her own regard for Jesus specifically.

So, I'll say, if you've got it, don't be afraid to spend it if you'd like. And if you don't? Well, I don't know how much of a loss that makes him if he only loved you for your teeth.

But, of course, there's nothing wrong with caring for yourself as much as you care for others, even if, maybe especially, you're currently the only one that's in charge of the challenge of tending to your needs. I don't think that is as much self-serving as it is self-preserving.

I have to admit, the older I get, the more I probably lean towards thinking like Mr. Hopkins. I could be misinterpreting, but I think his statement was more about the moments that will otherwise slip by, and unfortunately, a good number of moments cost an awful lot of money.

I always think back to a trip I took with a relative that was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. I was more than willing to pay the money for a guided tour of some of the places we went (to tell us what I was looking at and the history behind it, etc.,) but my family member insisted we just look around ourselves and save the money instead. Since this person had set up the trip, I went with their wishes, but I would have gladly paid for the expertise, rather than just wandering around aimlessly.

I will only splurge on something if I know I can pay for it -- I won't take out loans or put something on my credit card I can't pay it off interest-free -- so I keep some money aside for such opportunities. As Mr. Hopkinds said, more money can be made, but for us normal people, it sure does take a long time to do make it -- so I keep a tight reign.

This past weekend, I had an opportunity to provide a moment for some family members. I had the money, but always being frugal, I was internally fretting over whether to spend it. After praying, I felt like God specifically put His finger on a specific amount I knew I had, and said, "You have a moment before you that maybe only happens once a year, if that. Don't let it pass by."

And, after experiencing the outcome, I knew God was in the midst of that moment.

But how to get to a point where we can almost always tell when something is just our fleeting flesh, or something that God might remind us of in eternity?

I'm still working at learning that level of discernment.
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
6,006
2,377
113
#8
Consuming sufficient nutrition during senior years is a MAJOR factor concerning quality of life.
And a lack of teeth or being uncomfortable because of painful or uncomfortable teeth is a major reason for insufficient nutrition when senior citizens do not feel like eating but need to.
IE the person has only 2 teeth in their mouth which their dentures hook onto but both are hurting and becoming impacted. Exactly what do you do then?
Especially when they are super thin and underweight and have been for some time.

Their health is now on a downhill slide that could have been avoided if they simply had good teeth. But instead they hid themselves away from sharing meals with others so they could hide their issues. This is a MAJOR cause of problems with the geriatric crowd. And completely preventable.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
26,297
8,733
113
#9
Consuming sufficient nutrition during senior years is a MAJOR factor concerning quality of life.
And a lack of teeth or being uncomfortable because of painful or uncomfortable teeth is a major reason for insufficient nutrition when senior citizens do not feel like eating but need to.
IE the person has only 2 teeth in their mouth which their dentures hook onto but both are hurting and becoming impacted. Exactly what do you do then?
Especially when they are super thin and underweight and have been for some time.

Their health is now on a downhill slide that could have been avoided if they simply had good teeth. But instead they hid themselves away from sharing meals with others so they could hide their issues. This is a MAJOR cause of problems with the geriatric crowd. And completely preventable.
Believe it or not, this happens with dogs too. They can't tell you a tooth is hurting, but if a dog suddenly stops eating dry, crunchy dog food that he used to gobble up everyday, try wet dog food from a can. If it suddenly makes his appetite mysteriously return, he might have a bad tooth that kills him when he tries to chew dry dog food.
 

Tall_Timbers

Well-known member
Mar 31, 2023
919
949
93
68
Cheyenne WY
christiancommunityforum.com
#10
Good question, @seoulsearch! I currently have two gaps in my mouth that teeth used to fill. Whenever a dentist asks me if I want to put a tooth in those empty parking spots, I tell them at my age I wouldn't get a good return on the investment, so no, thank you. Recently when my wife started the process of getting a fake tooth placed in her one empty parking spot I learned that they usually have to do a bone graft that they get from a cadaver first, so they have something to screw the new fake tooth in to. Since I'm one who doesn't like the whole body parts swapping industry, I neither offer up my body parts nor am willing to borrow from someone else, living or deceased. So I guess even if I lose a front tooth I'll be leaving the spot empty even though I'd otherwise be inclined to not have a gap in the front of my mouth.

After all, this body is already dying, and it could be argued that the money used to replace a tooth could be given to the church or a Godly charity instead.
The way I manage our wealth (haha), it's not a use that money for this or for that choice... if I don't replace a tooth and spend all that money it just stays in the bank and probably ends up eventually going to income tax, property tax, utilities, food, or some other overhead cost... maybe even to charity if that was already in the offing.

I'm certainly not someone special or important
Jesus thinks you're important enough that he died on the cross for you... by my way of thinking that's pretty important. Humility becomes us, for sure, but our Creator loves us more than I'm capable of loving, and I love my children dearly and they are very important to me.

Back to how much we should spend... I've already decided that if I get cancer, unless it's a cancer that they can take care of easy-peasy I'm not going to go through that suffering and expense to try and beat it. For other stuff that comes my way I won't automatically expect the doctors to fix me... I'll want to look into the costs and how much I'd suffer if I don't questions before I decide. I'm disabled enough that I get free care from the VA (I do pay into Medicare), so the costs don't usually come out of my pocket, but when making care decisions I do my figuring as if it was coming out of my pocket instead of my pocket and the rest of the US taxpayers...
 

Mem

Senior Member
Sep 23, 2014
6,869
1,982
113
#11
I'm still working at learning that level of discernment.
I'm confident that one of your possessions is prudence.
Prov 8:5 O simple ones, learn to be shrewd; O fools, gain understanding
Prov 8:12 I, wisdom, dwell together with prudence, and I find knowledge and discretion.

You seem way to thoughtful to be found the fool,...very often... :LOL:
And I see you're well acquainted with your friends here, Wisdom, Knowledge, and Discretion. ;)
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
26,297
8,733
113
#15
Good question, @seoulsearch! I currently have two gaps in my mouth that teeth used to fill. Whenever a dentist asks me if I want to put a tooth in those empty parking spots, I tell them at my age I wouldn't get a good return on the investment, so no, thank you. Recently when my wife started the process of getting a fake tooth placed in her one empty parking spot I learned that they usually have to do a bone graft that they get from a cadaver first, so they have something to screw the new fake tooth in to. Since I'm one who doesn't like the whole body parts swapping industry, I neither offer up my body parts nor am willing to borrow from someone else, living or deceased. So I guess even if I lose a front tooth I'll be leaving the spot empty even though I'd otherwise be inclined to not have a gap in the front of my mouth.



The way I manage our wealth (haha), it's not a use that money for this or for that choice... if I don't replace a tooth and spend all that money it just stays in the bank and probably ends up eventually going to income tax, property tax, utilities, food, or some other overhead cost... maybe even to charity if that was already in the offing.



Jesus thinks you're important enough that he died on the cross for you... by my way of thinking that's pretty important. Humility becomes us, for sure, but our Creator loves us more than I'm capable of loving, and I love my children dearly and they are very important to me.

Back to how much we should spend... I've already decided that if I get cancer, unless it's a cancer that they can take care of easy-peasy I'm not going to go through that suffering and expense to try and beat it. For other stuff that comes my way I won't automatically expect the doctors to fix me... I'll want to look into the costs and how much I'd suffer if I don't questions before I decide. I'm disabled enough that I get free care from the VA (I do pay into Medicare), so the costs don't usually come out of my pocket, but when making care decisions I do my figuring as if it was coming out of my pocket instead of my pocket and the rest of the US taxpayers...
You're the kind of guy I want to grow up to be like someday.
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
58,154
27,576
113
#16
One was of Jordan Peterson who was in tears speaking of the difficulties men encounter finding someone, and their loss at even knowing how to begin to. And, addressing women's finicky selectiveness, he said, "...be picky" he shrugged, "...I guess that's your thing..., but..." he continued while choking back the tears unsuccessfully as he wiped them away, and returned to the subject of malekind's perspective, "...they're just so derided."
I love Jordan Peterson. I think he is a very brilliant man. I may have seen the video you mention here, or a similar one where he spoke of women's preferences when it comes to choosing a mate. Though I seem to be remembering it differently, because what I recall is that he said women need to be "picky" in order to hold men to a moral standard they might not adhere to otherwise. The upshot of it was that it forces men to want to be better versions of themselves. More mature and responsible. Not boys refusing to grow up...
 

Tall_Timbers

Well-known member
Mar 31, 2023
919
949
93
68
Cheyenne WY
christiancommunityforum.com
#18
This starts a countdown that is unrecoverable. Basically it's a death sentence of slow starvation.
I don't agree with that. That's what a lot of the poor in third world countries do. When they get down to not so many teeth, they try to get the rest pulled if they can. You can turn just about anything to mush so you can easily get a nutritional diet. Of course the poor in third world countries often don't get a nutritional diet, but they don't slowly starve, either, at least not in most cases.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
26,297
8,733
113
#19
This starts a countdown that is unrecoverable. Basically it's a death sentence of slow starvation.
That does not make sense. Even if there were no blenders, we've had mortar and pestle for... Like, millenia.

Shoot, my own dad got all his teeth pulled. He makes a lot of his own peanut/almond/cashew/walnut butter these days.