1Co 1:23
But we preach Christ crucified, unto the Jews a stumblingblock, and unto the Greeks foolishness;
1Co 1:24
But unto them which are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God, and the wisdom of God.
1Co 1:25
Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men; and the weakness of God is stronger than men.
The weakness here pertains to what Christ accomplished on the cross and how it was perceived by men. This by no means is even suggesting that God the Father has weaknesses.
Anyhow, you need a lot of help, and I hope that you find it through Christ.