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Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
29,023
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#61
This is a letter my mom wrote to you

Dear Subhumanoidal,

Do you realise that being a Christian did not cause you any ailments? they only make any that you have more visible. Have you ever considered that the things you are doing are causing you to be unhappy? It's been reported that the average person sins 3 times a minute.
A Christian that I know had a dream of Rihanna's song Umbrella being sung in hell by a demon. People often don't realise how much whatever you take in can affect your wellbeing and spiritual health. The devil is actively seeking your death. I remember once many years ago, I was looking at the case of a rock band that I had been listening to and noticed the symbols on the CD case cover were all satanic, and the lyrics are anti Christ and the whole band had dedicated themselves to the devil. I looked through all my CDs and got rid of anything with those symbols or where the overall message is negative, and Metallica was one of them. I throw all of them in in the garbage. Those lyrics and that music, they mean something, and it's not for your good. The same way a devil worshiper may cast a spell against his own soul same with these rock songs. Most people are like a bunch of guppies, mindlessly following things that ultimately lead to their own suffering. I've been alarmed since you said you liked death metal. Everyone knows that the devil rules the material world, and anything that is esteemed by man is an abomination to God. There's no hiding from sins. God, the maker of the universe, see you today. God is more powerful than evil. God will triumph over evil.

On this earth, we have to put up with people choosing to do evil, but someday God will put it beneath our feet and we won't have to hear of people's evil deeds any longer, nor will we remember them anymore, and my soul longs for that time.

Christians sometimes suffer loneliness, but not depression even when we are suffering or grieving, we have an inner peace and joy that God gives us.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever. Psalm 23:6 Amen.

God bless you,

Branch
Hmm... Yes, well... This letter makes one thing very, very clear.

Your momma don't know one single thing about Subhumanoidal. Nope. Not a thing.
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
4,252
3,307
113
#62
This is a letter my mom wrote to you

Dear Subhumanoidal,

Do you realise that being a Christian did not cause you any ailments? they only make any that you have more visible. Have you ever considered that the things you are doing are causing you to be unhappy? It's been reported that the average person sins 3 times a minute.
A Christian that I know had a dream of Rihanna's song Umbrella being sung in hell by a demon. People often don't realise how much whatever you take in can affect your wellbeing and spiritual health. The devil is actively seeking your death. I remember once many years ago, I was looking at the case of a rock band that I had been listening to and noticed the symbols on the CD case cover were all satanic, and the lyrics are anti Christ and the whole band had dedicated themselves to the devil. I looked through all my CDs and got rid of anything with those symbols or where the overall message is negative, and Metallica was one of them. I throw all of them in in the garbage. Those lyrics and that music, they mean something, and it's not for your good. The same way a devil worshiper may cast a spell against his own soul same with these rock songs. Most people are like a bunch of guppies, mindlessly following things that ultimately lead to their own suffering. I've been alarmed since you said you liked death metal. Everyone knows that the devil rules the material world, and anything that is esteemed by man is an abomination to God. There's no hiding from sins. God, the maker of the universe, see you today. God is more powerful than evil. God will triumph over evil.

On this earth, we have to put up with people choosing to do evil, but someday God will put it beneath our feet and we won't have to hear of people's evil deeds any longer, nor will we remember them anymore, and my soul longs for that time.

Christians sometimes suffer loneliness, but not depression even when we are suffering or grieving, we have an inner peace and joy that God gives us.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever. Psalm 23:6 Amen.

God bless you,

Branch
Depression has various physical or emotional causes.
I once knew a guy who told me he had issues with depression. I gave him advice on how to handle it. He took it and it changed his life. He simply needed to make some lifestyle changes.
Such things do not work on me. I started taking meds for my depression, recently. It has helped some.
I also went through years of anxiety and panic attacks. Fortunately I eventually managed to work my way past it, without meds. But it's possible for it to return under the right circumstances.

I believe music is subjective to each person.
But after 36 years of listening to metal of all kinds, I know what to look for to avoid.
I'm aware of music that can have a negative impact on me, and I avoid it.
I also listen to things other than metal.

Someone having a dream does not, to me, equate as proof of anything.

Much of the Satanism or occultism displayed in metal isn't really what they believe. It's just a gimmick.
I spoke to a secular band that used satanic symbols on their album cover. They admitted most of the band was not into Satanism or the occult, but it was just a gimmick.
They were all really nice people, actually. One member shared that she tried to go to a church once, seeking help and curious about God. And she was kicked out and shoo'd away because of her clothing. And was not welcome back.


Ecclesiastes 7:3
Sorrow is better than laughter,
for sadness has a refining influence on us.
 

Mem

Senior Member
Sep 23, 2014
7,837
2,411
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#63
When I made my debut on the www, one of the pen names I wrote under was "TragedyAnn" and so, subsequently, when Columbia House sent me and invite to receive some free CDs for subscribing, I obliqued simply because I saw a band calling themselves exactly that (I had also took that opportunity to order the Newsboys' Love Liberty Disco) And, after receiving the cd, I was stunned to discover their song, "Why Can't the World Love?" was within their playlist. It was their music, but I recognized my lyrics as I would my own brainchild that I had released 'into the world,' and was so honored that someone was compelled by the world as much as to pair them with their own melodies and harmonies.
If we are commissioned to 'go into all the world...' why should we designate any realm as a 'forbidden' land.
 

Mem

Senior Member
Sep 23, 2014
7,837
2,411
113
#64
#edit
I saw a band calling themselves exactly that (in the Christian category in which I had also took that opportunity to order the Newsboys' Love Liberty Disco)
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
4,252
3,307
113
#65
When I made my debut on the www, one of the pen names I wrote under was "TragedyAnn" and so, subsequently, when Columbia House sent me and invite to receive some free CDs for subscribing, I obliqued simply because I saw a band calling themselves exactly that (I had also took that opportunity to order the Newsboys' Love Liberty Disco) And, after receiving the cd, I was stunned to discover their song, "Why Can't the World Love?" was within their playlist. It was their music, but I recognized my lyrics as I would my own brainchild that I had released 'into the world,' and was so honored that someone was compelled by the world as much as to pair them with their own melodies and harmonies.
If we are commissioned to 'go into all the world...' why should we designate any realm as a 'forbidden' land.
I actually remember hearing that bands name as a teen. The singer had another band, also, Sometime Sunday, though they were more edgy. I believe i have all three of their albums, but none by Tragedy Ann.
 

Mem

Senior Member
Sep 23, 2014
7,837
2,411
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#66
I actually remember hearing that bands name as a teen. The singer had another band, also, Sometime Sunday, though they were more edgy. I believe i have all three of their albums, but none by Tragedy Ann.
I didn't notice them until Viva la Revolucion (2000), the 3rd (and last?) album, for obvious reasons. I spelled my pen name with two 'g's so I'm not saying that they necessarily named their band after me but perhaps this is why (one of them?) might have particularly noticed what I wrote. I debuted with the operating system Windows 98, and I see that this is the date of their first album. But I heard that song once and knew the lyrics by heart ;)
 
Jan 31, 2025
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#67
Dear Subhumannoidal,

The Bible says as a man's name is, so is he. I wonder why a person would choose an evil name when there are so many fantastic bible names that are edifying to other people. When they read the person's names, like Abraham, Issac, Jacob, Moses, etc., you could have called yourself Calvery Cross, Golgotha, or Gethsemane. But you did not choose any of those names. You choose sub-humanoid, and that is what you are. You decided to call yourselves sub-humanoid. The name subhumanoid is an offence to the Lord God. Subhumanoid is a sin offence to God. Your choice indicated that you would rebelliously and stiff necked you would cling to your sins while declaring your innocence. But I have told thousands of individuals about the Lord Jesus' great love for mankind and how the Lord God loves you very much. If you were the only person in the world, the Lord Jesus would have suffered and gone to Calvery's cross so you could be saved. Jesus loves you so much. If you realize how much Jesus loves you, you will be amazed at Jesus's supernatural, powerful, holy love for you. And Jesus, the one person without sin, wants you, a Godless sinner, to repent and come to him today while you can. The Bible says now is the acceptable time to come to the Lord and be saved. The Bible say:



Every way of a man is right in his own eyes: but the LORD pondereth the hearts. Proverbs 21:2: You can be saved by believing and trusting in The Lord Jesus Christ of Nazareth; repent of your sins and stop willfully sinning. Jesus can change your hard heart to a fleshly, soft heart. The Lord really wants to save you from hell and damnation. Do you know that in hell, there is no water to drink? If you don't think that would be utterly agonizing, try going a few days without drinking any fluids and let me know how that goes for you. The Bible says:


  1. He called out, 'Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus to dip the tip of his finger in water and cool my tongue; for I am in agony in these flames.' Luke 16:24 The Bible says:
The phrase "devil masquerades as an angel of the light" is a biblical reference . This verse states that Satan disguises himself as an angel of light to deceive people into believing he is good and truthful. This deception is part of Satan's strategy to lead people away from God and into sin. The verse serves as a warning to believers to be cautious and discerning, as Satan often uses false pretenses to manipulate and mislead. 2 corinthians 11:14. Subhamanoid you said you have been listening to metal for 36 years. You are aware of music that can negatively impact or "affect." on you, and you avoid it. Do you speak as someone who thinks he can establish the boundary of good and evil for himself? Also, he doesn't feel it is important to abstain from evil music or things with evil logos written all over them. The Bible says we are not to touch any evil thing that is known to be dedicated to the devil or demons. I know that Violence and lying go hand in hand. Sub-humanoid said that most of the band was not into satanism. Is not Satan called the father of lies, and if one of the band members is a satan worshiper, they all are because they have willingly accepted that evil person{s} into their band? The Bible says: can two men walk to gather and not agree? The Bible says one bad or rotten fig will turn the whole basket of figs rotten. Subhumanoid: do you think you are mentally strong enough to ward off all the wilds of the devil, or do you believe you are more abundant in wisdom than Our Lord God?
Jeremiah 24:2
 
Jan 31, 2025
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#68
Part 2
You said:

Sorrow is better than laughter: for by the sadness of the countenance the heart is made better. But you mean:

These verses highlight the profound impact of evil actions and thoughts on our emotional well-being.

As saith the proverb of the ancients, Wickedness proceedeth from the wicked: but mine hand shall not be upon thee. Meaning: I will not touch any evil thing. The most ancient saying: Wickedness proceeds from the wicked.' This statement reflects the biblical principle that one's actions directly result from one's character. It echoes the idea found in passages like Matthew 7:17-18, where Jesus teaches that a good tree bears good fruit, and a bad tree bears bad fruit.


Behold Israel after the flesh: are not they which eat of the sacrifices partakers of the altar? What say I then? That the idol is anything, or that which is offered in sacrifice to idols is any thing? But I say, that the things which the Gentiles sacrifice, they sacrifice to devils, and not to God: and I would not that ye should have fellowship with devils. You cannot drink the cup of the Lord, and the cup of devils: ye cannot be partakers of the Lord's table and of the table of devils. Do we provoke the Lord to jealousy? Are we stronger than he? All things are lawful for me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but all things edify not. Let no man seek his own, but every man another's wealth. 1 Corinthians 10:212 Corinthians 7:10
The Bible warns against the sorrow of worshipping evil, emphasizing that it leads to death. In 2 Corinthians 7:10, it states, "For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death." This verse highlights the contrast between godly sorrow, which is a sign of true repentance and leads to salvation, and the sorrow of the world, which is a sign of false worship and leads to death. The Bible encourages believers to seek godly sorrow, which is a sign of a heart that is truly committed to God and is willing to turn away from evil. Subhumanoid you really mean: but the sorrows of the world worketh death that yours as in 2 Corinthians 7:10. Not:ecclessiastes 7:3.I knew right away you were talking about this kind of evil sorrow with your name subhumanoid. And there you are in the last part of your letter. @Subhumanoidal, you have a lot of gall to blame the church for asking a satanic-worshipping metal band member female who wore clothing with satanic symbols—and x-rated cursings and unimaginable Violence in the writings on her clothing, which she probably thought was a very funny thing to do. as she directed against the heavenly host. Yes, she said she was curious about God. She went to church to intimidate the people at the church service. And you know she did not go alone. She took along some of her friends; that was just their nature.

Then goeth he, and taketh with himself seven other spirits more wicked than himself, and they enter in and dwell there: and the last state of that man is worse than the first. Even so, shall it be also unto this wicked generation. Matthew 12:45. Yes, the Bible says to go into all the world and preach the gospel, but enjoying evil things is forbidden to Christians: There are lyrics in the death metal music you listen to that say these things in their songs. Sadly, the songs you listen to say worse things than murder, sexual immorality, Violence, lying, animal cruelty, hatred of women, hatred of children, despising purity and goodness and slandering and fighting against God. Only a Godless hyena would listen to evil music that defames Our glorious God.
Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.1 Corinthians 6:18The Bible emphasizes the importance of despising evil and embracing goodness. Proverbs 8:13 states, "To fear the LORD is to hate evil; I hate arrogant pride, evil conduct, and perverse speech." Romans 12:9 instructs believers, "Love must be sincere. Detest what is evil; cling to what is good." These verses highlight the internal and external responses to despising evil, reflecting a commitment to righteousness and alignment with God's will.
 
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#69
May 23, 2009
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#71
Part 3

From that time, Jesus began to preach and to say, Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand. Matthew 4:17. Yes, Proverbs 4:14-15 makes a lot of sense.


14 Enter not into the path of the wicked, and go not in the way of evil men.

15 Avoid it, pass not by it, turn from it, and pass away. God bless you, brother, and may the Lord Jesus come to you and help you repent. Amen Sincerely Branch
@Daisy2 your mom should probably get her own account if she intends to keep posting like this.
I would like to second @Snackersmom's suggestion that, @Daisy2, if your mom wants to continue to post here, she needs to get her own account. I don't know if that's an official site rule, but it makes it very confusing when multiple people are posting under one name. I know you'd mentioned in the past that your brother was getting into your account and posting as well, as there were some bizarre posts under your old name that didn't make any sense until you explained that it was someone else hacking your account.

This is at least the second time I've seen what I'm assuming is your mother write long, judgmental posts of someone she doesn't know and calling them to repentance.

May I suggest that she please go back and read at least 6 months to a year's worth of the person's previous posts, if not more, before making these assumptions about the users?

I've been on CC since 2009 (16 years,) and @Subhumanoidal has been here about as long, if not longer, though he used to be under a different name. He has been through more than the next 10 people combined, and has still held on to his faith, which I have much admiration for. I even went to him when a good friend of mine was struck down with some of the tragic, life-altering things he has all too much experience with, by no fault of their own (as much of what he's been through wasn't his fault either,) and he spent a lot of time talking things through with me and giving me wise counsel.

It's painful to see him judged by those who haven't followed along with his journey over the years or even bother to learn much about him. I know that's not possible for newcomers, but I have seen people unfairly dismiss him and sometimes blatantly call him an unbeliever, not knowing the rich history he has in serving God's people and working in youth ministry.

@Subhumanoidal has explained in the past why he's chosen the names he has -- for those of us who have been here a while, we know it's not out of evil intentions or something Satanic.

@Daisy2, I know your mother had no way of knowing these things.

But may I humbly suggest that she start putting in the time to learn about the people here, what they're going through, and their own explanations before writing out such condemning spiritual prescriptions for those she does not know.

And I suppose your mother may judge me as well, and tell me all the things I need to do and repent of -- and she's free to do that, without knowing much of anything about me -- just as she is doing to others here.
 
Mar 13, 2014
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Tennessee
#73
I would like to second @Snackersmom's suggestion that, @Daisy2, if your mom wants to continue to post here, she needs to get her own account. I don't know if that's an official site rule, but it makes it very confusing when multiple people are posting under one name. I know you'd mentioned in the past that your brother was getting into your account and posting as well, as there were some bizarre posts under your old name that didn't make any sense until you explained that it was someone else hacking your account.

This is at least the second time I've seen what I'm assuming is your mother write long, judgmental posts of someone she doesn't know and calling them to repentance.

May I suggest that she please go back and read at least 6 months to a year's worth of the person's previous posts, if not more, before making these assumptions about the users?

I've been on CC since 2009 (16 years,) and @Subhumanoidal has been here about as long, if not longer, though he used to be under a different name. He has been through more than the next 10 people combined, and has still held on to his faith, which I have much admiration for. I even went to him when a good friend of mine was struck down with some of the tragic, life-altering things he has all too much experience with, by no fault of their own (as much of what he's been through wasn't his fault either,) and he spent a lot of time talking things through with me and giving me wise counsel.

It's painful to see him judged by those who haven't followed along with his journey over the years or even bother to learn much about him. I know that's not possible for newcomers, but I have seen people unfairly dismiss him and sometimes blatantly call him an unbeliever, not knowing the rich history he has in serving God's people and working in youth ministry.

@Subhumanoidal has explained in the past why he's chosen the names he has -- for those of us who have been here a while, we know it's not out of evil intentions or something Satanic.

@Daisy2, I know your mother had no way of knowing these things.

But may I humbly suggest that she start putting in the time to learn about the people here, what they're going through, and their own explanations before writing out such condemning spiritual prescriptions for those she does not know.

And I suppose your mother may judge me as well, and tell me all the things I need to do and repent of -- and she's free to do that, without knowing much of anything about me -- just as she is doing to others here.
I fully concur with your post. Outstanding rebuttal.

@Subhumanoidal screen name seems to me to be a humble name, and humility, which is a good characteristic trait to have. His journey, while often time painful and sad, is also an inspiration. His posts exemplify courage and strength.
 
Jan 31, 2025
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#74
@Daisy2 your mom should probably get her own account if she intends to keep posting like this.
Yes, I thought the same, but the account I started had not received the email to be able to comment yet. She has always been direct; she is not being judgmental, that's just how she is. People have always said she can get to the heart of the matter.

"It is my Christian duty to warn of the destruction to come so that when you are before the Lord, you cannot say Father, you did not know " basically this or that was wrong
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
29,023
10,463
113
#75
Yes, I thought the same, but the account I started had not received the email to be able to comment yet. She has always been direct; she is not being judgmental, that's just how she is. People have always said she can get to the heart of the matter.

"It is my Christian duty to warn of the destruction to come so that when you are before the Lord, you cannot say Father, you did not know " basically this or that was wrong
1: Somebody is full of it. Whether it's Daisy2, Daisy2's mother, Daisy2's brother, Daisy2's dog or The Ghost Of Daisy2's Christmas Past, somebody is talking out of their butt. There are sooooo many things they have said that are objectively and demonstrably incorrect.

2: Somebody needs a hobby. Something they can do instead of going around making snide comments about people they don't know on random forums. I recommend needlepoint or rollerblading, depending on the person's balance and fragility.
 
May 23, 2009
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#76
@Oncefallen,

May I ask, just to clarify --

I know the rule is that each user is to have only one account (no one is to have multiple accounts.)

But is there any specific rule about how many users can post through one account?

I just wanted to ask so that we all know what the official stance is.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
29,023
10,463
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#77
Mind you, this is not me leaping to Sub's defense. I'm pretty sure Sub doesn't really care about what some random person on a forum says about him, especially when what was said was hilariously far from the mark. This is just me stating an obervation.
 
May 23, 2009
17,422
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#78
Yes, I thought the same, but the account I started had not received the email to be able to comment yet. She has always been direct; she is not being judgmental, that's just how she is. People have always said she can get to the heart of the matter.
"It is my Christian duty to warn of the destruction to come so that when you are before the Lord, you cannot say Father, you did not know " basically this or that was wrong
Yes, but as Christians, we also have a right to protect the flock from unjust assumptions.

From childhood, I've been exposed to people who take the same approach as your mother, and it's what makes me want to leave the Christian community... People who swoop in, declare a spiritual prescription as if they are some form of higher authority from God (saying it is their duty or calling,) but make absolutely zero effort in getting to know the people they are speaking to, while failing to offer any accountability or track record of their own.

If you go to a doctor and tell him your symptoms (fatigue, stress, lack of sleep, etc.,) there are an awful lot of things that could be causing those generic symptoms. Do you want him to just automatically make a diagnosis in the 2 minutes it took for you to tell him what's wrong? No. You expect that he's going to take some time to delve into your medical history, read your records, find out what treatments you've tried before, and what has -- or hasn't worked. You will expect him to ask questions and do quite a bit of digging into who you are and what you've been through before writing out some kind of authoritative "remedy". And you have a right to expect that this doctor will show you his credentials, as well as proof that he himself adheres to his own advice.

I expect no less from all the people who come and go here on this site, and in churches, speaking as spiritual authorities. Having been around people all my life who want to take a quick glance at me, then tell me everything I'm doing wrong spiritually (because it's their Christian responsibility, after all,) I am always surprised that these people seem to think that we don't also have the ability to communicate with God on our own as well.

Do they think they are the ultimate mediators between us and God?

The Bible says that teachers -- and I'm guessing this goes for those who appoint themselves too, as well as those whom God has called -- are held to a higher standard.

I would think part of that higher standard should be more than just anonymously writing long spiritual lectures to people they know nothing about. And so I always pray over people who do this, "Lord, hold them to that higher standard, because You do not change, nor do Your requirements. Show them what those requirements are, lest they do more harm than good, no matter how holy their intentions. Thank you for watching over us -- in Jesus's name I pray, Amen."

I can only speak for myself, but I believe God told me long ago that, "The ones who show they will bleed with you during your worst times -- those are the ones whose rebukes you should take to heart."

How much is your mother willing to come here and prove that she will put in the time and investment to bleed WITH us, not just preach AT us?
 
Mar 13, 2014
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#79
1: Somebody is full of it. Whether it's Daisy2, Daisy2's mother, Daisy2's brother, Daisy2's dog or The Ghost Of Daisy2's Christmas Past, somebody is talking out of their butt. There are sooooo many things they have said that are objectively and demonstrably incorrect.

2: Somebody needs a hobby. Something they can do instead of going around making snide comments about people they don't know on random forums. I recommend needlepoint or rollerblading, depending on the person's imbalance and fragility.
Fixed it for you. Agree with your entire post.
 
Jan 31, 2025
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#80
Yes, but as Christians, we also have a right to protect the flock from unjust assumptions.

From childhood, I've been exposed to people who take the same approach as your mother, and it's what makes me want to leave the Christian community... People who swoop in, declare a spiritual prescription as if they are some form of higher authority from God (saying it is their duty or calling,) but make absolutely zero effort in getting to know the people they are speaking to, while failing to offer any accountability or track record of their own.

If you go to a doctor and tell him your symptoms (fatigue, stress, lack of sleep, etc.,) there are an awful lot of things that could be causing those generic symptoms. Do you want him to just automatically make a diagnosis in the 2 minutes it took for you to tell him what's wrong? No. You expect that he's going to take some time to delve into your medical history, read your records, find out what treatments you've tried before, and what has -- or hasn't worked. You will expect him to ask questions and do quite a bit of digging into who you are and what you've been through before writing out some kind of authoritative "remedy". And you have a right to expect that this doctor will show you his credentials, as well as proof that he himself adheres to his own advice.

I expect no less from all the people who come and go here on this site, and in churches, speaking as spiritual authorities. Having been around people all my life who want to take a quick glance at me, then tell me everything I'm doing wrong spiritually (because it's their Christian responsibility, after all,) I am always surprised that these people seem to think that we don't also have the ability to communicate with God on our own as well.

Do they think they are the ultimate mediators between us and God?

The Bible says that teachers -- and I'm guessing this goes for those who appoint themselves too, as well as those whom God has called -- are held to a higher standard.

I would think part of that higher standard should be more than just anonymously writing long spiritual lectures to people they know nothing about. And so I always pray over people who do this, "Lord, hold them to that higher standard, because You do not change, nor do Your requirements. Show them what those requirements are, lest they do more harm than good, no matter how holy their intentions. Thank you for watching over us -- in Jesus's name I pray, Amen."

I can only speak for myself, but I believe God told me long ago that, "The ones who show they will bleed with you during your worst times -- those are the ones whose rebukes you should take to heart."

How much is your mother willing to come here and prove that she will put in the time and investment to bleed WITH us, not just preach AT us?
God makes everyone different. I've seen many people my moms helped over the years. I wondered too, because like you say, Christians often stay in one place and mind their vineyard that God has given them. Often we only meet people 1- 3 times, and then years later, I think that's just how my mothers been called to serve.
As for the discussion at hand, the psychologist will tell you there's no wrong way, and people of today say their grey area is where their neither right nor wrong but the bible lays out almost every part of our lives, every right and wrong is defined.

Maybe it would have been better to never have shared my past on a public forum. But those psychological problems are learnt, it's not the same. And I'm not disagreeing with my mother, even though she said it more directly. Then I would have. The cause and the result are still the same. I guess it really comes down to who do we fear, God or man?