Should Christians Use Dating Apps?

[Snackersmom]

Then go in peace, no hard feelings. The only pathetic thing is your discontentment with singleness.

Just FYI, if you ever want people to take you seriously then you will have to stop modeling your mothers' habits of dismission and avoidance.

I get that you're a baby Christian, maybe you haven't had time for growth yet but at some point you need to make an effort to learn how grown men are supposed to behave in Christ. I wish you well in that journey, if you ever decide to begin it.

 

[Lovette]

If you can't answer my question then why would I answer yours?

Why would I answer a loaded question?

 

[Snackersmom]

Why would I answer a loaded question?

It is a simple question, why do you think it is loaded?

 

[Lovette]

Just FYI, if you ever want people to take you seriously then you will have to stop modeling your mothers' habits of dismission and avoidance.

I get that you're a baby Christian, maybe you haven't had time for growth yet but at some point you need to make an effort to learn how grown men are supposed to behave in Christ. I wish you well in that journey, if you ever decide to begin it.

You know neither me nor my mother. And I'm not sure what your definition of "grown man" is, I don't see how pursuing strangers for a date on dating apps counts as any sign of spiritual maturity. That seems like the opposite of spiritual maturity to me.

And just to be clear, i have nothing against you, all I criticize is dating in general, especially dating apps. But if you decide to internalize that into a personal attack, let it go.

 

[Lovette]

Why would I answer a loaded question?

Why did you assume I was bothered? That was like me asking you, "why did you cheat in your exam?" "Why did you shoplift?"

 

[RodColeman]

Or back then it was arrange or semiarranged, now it's dating app arranged.

But probably still all a pointless, ungodly waste of time, am I right?

 

[cinder]

Not related to dating. But this thread made me think.
Many people don't go to
Church, is it because it is expensive?

To offer to God as able, Abraham, jacob.... did, is expensive? So they don't go?

Not expensive, but for probably more people than we care to admit it's not worth the investment.

Churches have their own culture and it's one that heavily favors extraverts who are married with children and in recent years many churches have started tailoring their programs to women, their most loyal demographic group and the ones most likely to volunteer.

So if you're an extraverted woman who is married with children, church is a wonderful place that you love being at. The fewer of those criteria you meet, the less it seems the church has to offer.

That's a generalization, but that's the basic framework for why some people don't find church worth it.

 

[Churchgoer]

Not expensive, but for probably more people than we care to admit it's not worth the investment.

Churches have their own culture and it's one that heavily favors extraverts who are married with children and in recent years many churches have started tailoring their programs to women, their most loyal demographic group and the ones most likely to volunteer.

So if you're an extraverted woman who is married with children, church is a wonderful place that you love being at. The fewer of those criteria you meet, the less it seems the church has to offer.

That's a generalization, but that's the basic framework for why some people don't find church worth it.

Very interesting. Never thought about introvert vs extravert thing for church.
Introvert people most likely congregate on internet chat forums?

 

[cinder]

Very interesting. Never thought about introvert vs extravert thing for church.
Introvert people most likely congregate on internet chat forums?

Yes, introverted people also prefer text based communication to speaking with people. Gives our slower and deeper thinking brains a chance to put together what we want to say and make sure it's coherent.

 

[Snackersmom]

You know neither me nor my mother. And I'm not sure what your definition of "grown man" is, I don't see how pursuing strangers for a date on dating apps counts as any sign of spiritual maturity. That seems like the opposite of spiritual maturity to me.

I've never met your mother, but I know what you posted about her in a different thread and the behavior you described in her is the same behavior you have been modeling on this site:

....I never put myself in a vulnerable position, never reveal any of my feelings to anybody, not even my mother, because I know for certain, that she won't understand, she'd blame me and guilt trip me for any of my problems, or she'll dunk her own feelings on top of me, and I don't really have the words to articulate anyway, so the most rational thing to do is keep it all to myself and only confide in God.

I'm not judging you for what you said above; far from it. If anything it helps me have compassion for you and understand why you behave the way that you do. But just because your behavior is understandable, that doesn't mean it is correct. Jesus will help you become a Godly man if you let Him. There is a LOT more to being a Godly man than sitting alone in your apartment hiding from females.

 

[Snackersmom]

And just to be clear, i have nothing against you, all I criticize is dating in general, especially dating apps. But if you decide to internalize that into a personal attack, let it go.

If you seriously think that all you criticize is dating and dating apps then you need to take a look through your posts, you might be surprised

And no, I don't take anything you say personally or seriously, no worries there. I'm really just trying to teach you some basic human decency at this point. It might be a colossal waste of time but life is about the journey .

Plus, I do genuinely care about you and hope you are able to move past your traumas at some point.

 

[OMC]

Dear friends,
Christians are called to speak to one another with truth and grace, even when disagreements arise. Scripture commands us to let our speech be “always with grace” (Colossians 4:6) and to pursue unity through humility and gentleness (Ephesians 4:2–3). We are to be “quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger” (James 1:19), remembering that anger does not produce the righteousness of God.

When differences of understanding appear, believers must correct one another with patience and kindness (2 Timothy 2:24–25), avoiding harshness, quarrels, and pride. Love must govern our conversations, for “love is patient and kind… it does not insist on its own way” (1 Corinthians 13:4–5).

Christ calls us to speak the truth, but to do so in love (Ephesians 4:15). Even strong disagreements must be handled with gentleness, knowing that we are members of one body and that Christ Himself prayed that His people would be one (John 17:21).

Therefore, Christian conversation—whether in agreement or disagreement—must reflect the character of Christ: humble, peace‑making, slow to anger, rich in mercy, and anchored in truth. In all things, our words must aim to build up, not tear down (Ephesians 4:29).
Please my friends, let us continue in Love.

 

[Snackersmom]

Why did you assume I was bothered? That was like me asking you, "why did you cheat in your exam?" "Why did you shoplift?"

I mean, all I said was that I had dated a few godly men and none them asked me for sex, you responded by telling me to keep that to myself, nobody asked me to say that, don't call them Godly, stop ridiculing the #metoo movement, don't "throw that" at you....... sounds to me like you were pretty dang bothered. Or is that how you act what you're NOT bothered lol

 

[Churchgoer]

Dear friends,
Christians are called to speak to one another with truth and grace, even when disagreements arise. Scripture commands us to let our speech be “always with grace” (Colossians 4:6) and to pursue unity through humility and gentleness (Ephesians 4:2–3). We are to be “quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger” (James 1:19), remembering that anger does not produce the righteousness of God.

When differences of understanding appear, believers must correct one another with patience and kindness (2 Timothy 2:24–25), avoiding harshness, quarrels, and pride. Love must govern our conversations, for “love is patient and kind… it does not insist on its own way” (1 Corinthians 13:4–5).

Christ calls us to speak the truth, but to do so in love (Ephesians 4:15). Even strong disagreements must be handled with gentleness, knowing that we are members of one body and that Christ Himself prayed that His people would be one (John 17:21).

Therefore, Christian conversation—whether in agreement or disagreement—must reflect the character of Christ: humble, peace‑making, slow to anger, rich in mercy, and anchored in truth. In all things, our words must aim to build up, not tear down (Ephesians 4:29).
Please my friends, let us continue in Love.

When someone is so strongly against something, such as dating app, dating, marriage.... it prompts one to talk down to other people who is not against it, including bad mouth innocent people.

Possible personal history that can't be disclosed , that buried in heart hurting so much.
Whatever comes out of one's mouth, it is a reflection of one's heart.

It is good to kneel down pray to Jesus, let God guide one to some good help to let out personal hurts.

One pastor shared his childhood suffering was so big for him, he couldn't let go for longest time. Until one day at a group prayer, he broke down and let it all out. GOD healed him right there, at the feet of Jesus.

He later went back to his family, forgave, let go, makeup, God gave them some good years together.

 

[Lovette]

But probably still all a pointless, ungodly waste of time, am I right?

From your own experience? Thousands of swipes for nothing?

 

[Lovette]

I've never met your mother, but I know what you posted about her in a different thread and the behavior you described in her is the same behavior you have been modeling on this site:



I'm not judging you for what you said above; far from it. If anything it helps me have compassion for you and understand why you behave the way that you do. But just because your behavior is understandable, that doesn't mean it is correct. Jesus will help you become a Godly man if you let Him. There is a LOT more to being a Godly man than sitting alone in your apartment hiding from females.

I appreciate your compassion, but not your pity. What's not understandable to you is that there's no female around me to "hide from". Are you suggesting that I should hit a bar or a night club? I hope not, I don't expect that from a godly woman.

And yes, Jesus will help me become a godly man, probably by caring for my aged parents, all the way to the point of their funerals.

 

[Lovette]

If you seriously think that all you criticize is dating and dating apps then you need to take a look through your posts, you might be surprised

And no, I don't take anything you say personally or seriously, no worries there. I'm really just trying to teach you some basic human decency at this point. It might be a colossal waste of time but life is about the journey .

Plus, I do genuinely care about you and hope you are able to move past your traumas at some point.

Thanks, I've moved past my traumas years ago, thanks be to God! Therefore I won't deliberately and actively seek new ones.

And yes, life is a journey - from the heavenly father, into this fallen world. It's a journey of salvation, following Jesus back to home.

 

[Lovette]

I mean, all I said was that I had dated a few godly men and none them asked me for sex, you responded by telling me to keep that to myself, nobody asked me to say that, don't call them Godly, stop ridiculing the #metoo movement, don't "throw that" at you....... sounds to me like you were pretty dang bothered. Or is that how you act what you're NOT bothered lol

I was only bothered at your aggression, I never meant to go after your old post, you asked for it, so yes, don't throw that at me.

 

[RodColeman]

From your own experience? Thousands of swipes for nothing?

They were not "thousands," haha.

A dating app is just a tool to meet someone so you can potentially start a conversation, then potentially go on a first date, and then potentially go on more dates if you find each other interesting enough. It's not that complicated. A first date is not that big a deal.

What if a date is "arranged" by others, and the date doesn't go well? In the method that you, apparently, prefer? Is it still all a waste of time, in your view?

 

[Snackersmom]

I appreciate your compassion, but not your pity. What's not understandable to you is that there's no female around me to "hide from". Are you suggesting that I should hit a bar or a night club? I hope not, I don't expect that from a godly woman.

And yes, Jesus will help me become a godly man, probably by caring for my aged parents, all the way to the point of their funerals.

Why do you think that is not understandable to me? We are all well aware of your singleness and nobody is asking you to change it or telling you to go to bars . Why would you even consider that?