What category did your Dad fall under? (This was taken from a favorite sermon of mine using 1 Peter 3:7)
"Men are prone toward chauvinism or cowardice; too much, too little.
Chauvinism
No Sissy Stuff Sam.
He doesn’t know what a man is, he just knows a man’s not a woman so whatever a woman is he’s gonna be the opposite. Mom hugs, so he doesn’t hug. Mom says she loves you, so he doesn’t say he loves you. Mom kisses you, so he doesn’t kiss you ‘cause that’s girl stuff. This guy doesn’t understand that men and women are both made in the image and the likeness of God, that they have the same emotions and passions and experiences and they tend to express them in masculine or feminine ways, but being a man is not the opposite of being a woman, that you’re both made in the image of the likeness of God and you express yourself in masculine and feminine ways. And see these guys tend to think that to be a man means this, you can belch the loudest, spit the farthest, fart the stinkiest, and punch the hardest, that’s a man. That’s not a man. That’s a joke. There’s no woman here today praying, “God send me that. I want a real man.” But too many guys, especially guys that are single too long and guys who, you know, put twenty-seven guys into a one-bedroom apartment so they can each spend $30 a month on rent and spend all their time just rocking out to “Guitar Hero,” that’s what those guys think, and they’re idiots.
Success and Status Stewart
He defines himself, the Bible says, by what he has and does. He has this sort of leftover, hyper-jock competitive mentality. “Here’s how much I make. Here’s how my company’s doing. Here’s my car. Here’s my house. Here’s my success. Here are my wins. Here are my victories.” And he treats his wife just like another trophy, her job is to look pretty and be quiet and just make him look good as yet another notch on his belt. He doesn’t love her well, doesn’t serve her well. He’s more worried about his income and his possessions than his wife and his children.
Give ‘Em Hell Hank
This is the guy whose got anger, violence, short temper, rude, crude, mean. He’s harsh, he’s overbearing, he’s intimidating and he’s scary.
I’m the Boss Bob
This guy is just bossy. He thinks wherever he is that he’s the king of the whole thing. He’s always telling everybody what to do. He stands back at a distance like a drill sergeant and just barks out orders to his wife and barks out orders to his children. He has a hard time keeping a job because he always is bossing around his employer and his employees and no one can stand him. He thinks that being a man means being bossy and overbearing. And these guys are the worst when they show up to church. They want to be in authority, not under authority. These are the guys who show up and immediately say, “I want to lead, put me in charge of something.” You’re in charge of shutting up, that can be your specialty. These are the guys when you rebuke them, they just leave the church and they take their wife and children with them and their wife and children suffer ‘cause this is the guy who loves to be in authority, refuses to be under authority, likes to tell everyone what to do and he himself can’t be told anything. I’ve got a list of these guys. You can see it in their wife’s face. She’s miserable. You can see it in their children, they despise their father and he’s oblivious because he’s an imbecile. And they go from church to church to church and eventually it’s like “Well, we can’t find a good church” meaning “I can’t find a pastor dumb enough to take my orders.”
Cowardice
Little Boy Larry
he’s a total sweetheart. He’s a guy, in his twenties, thirties, God forbid, forties, can’t keep a job, forgets to set his alarm. He’s eight years into his undergraduate studies, works part time ‘cause it stresses him out. Still lives with his mom. Maybe he moved out, but his mom’s always worried about him so she brings him groceries and picks up his laundry and helps pay his bills. Little Boy Larry is a totally nice guy, he’s a real sweetie pie so nobody ever kicks him in the batteries. He gets away with murder. Little Boy Larry really loves his mom because she’s always changing his proverbial diaper. And his hope is to meet a really nice gal with a good job and a house so that he could go from his mom to his girlfriend or wife. And he’ll come up with dumb ideas like, “I’ll be the stay-at-home dad. I’m really good with kids since I am one. They really like me because we relate to one another as children.” Little Boy Larry is a joke. He gets away with murder, especially in the Christian church where he tends to be majority. Women who are attracted to these men say, “But I really love him.” Yes, you’re attracted to him as a mother is attracted to an orphan child, but that’s not a marriage. That’s a mother-child affection. That is not a wife-husband affection. You don’t look at this man, ladies, and say, “I respect him. I want my sons to be like him. I want my daughters to marry men like him.” You say things like “He has a lot of potential and no one understands him.” I do, he’s an idiot, and he’s fooled you.
Sturdy Oak Owen
This is the dad who goes to work and comes home, pays the bills, turns on the TV, and checks out. This is the dad who he is physically present but emotionally absent. He’s always working on his car. He’s always on the Internet. He’s always in his study. He’s always in the garage. He’s always in the yard. You say, “Dad, you were never there.” He’s like, “I was always there.” Yes, in a comatose state. There’s some of you here, your dad never said, “I love you.” He never hugged you. He never encouraged you and what he would say is “What do you mean I wasn’t a good dad? I put food on the table. I put a roof over your head and I came home every night and I was there.” He wasn’t there, present, connected, participating. That’s a coward. That guy’s ultimately a coward. He’s afraid to get involved in the lives of his wife and children.
Hyper-Spiritual Henry
This guy drives me insane. This guy drives me insane. This is the guy with the Christian T-shirts, Christian bumper stickers, always listening to praise music, always reading the latest trendy Christian garbage book. Everything’s about God, but it never really makes any sense. He wants everybody to know how hyper spiritual he is to the point where his wife and children are embarrassed by him. The kids don’t bring friends over to the house. “How come you don’t bring your friends over?” “Dad, ‘cause you’re embarrassing. You keep talking about the Canaanites and want to argue over circumcision. You’re embarrassing.” Some of you had this dad, you’re out to dinner, guy comes to pour the water, he’s like “Do you know Jesus is the water of life and he can have streams of living water come from you?” The fourteen-year-old kid grabs his salad fork and is trying to go under the table and find their jugular and just end their life ‘cause their dad’s embarrassing. Last name is Flanders, terrible. To be the spiritual leader, gentlemen, does not mean that you’re just a total, freakish odd ball.
Good Time Gary
everybody loves him, life of the party. He is funny, he is charming, he is winsome, he is entertaining. There’s always a crowd of people around him. Everybody likes him. He gets along with everybody and here’s the key, everybody loves him, nobody respects him ‘cause he’s a joke. That’s why he’s so funny, he doesn’t just tell jokes, he is one. Every time something happens in his life, he just turns it into a joke. He doesn’t realize that his life is the joke. Can’t hold a job, can’t pay his bills, can’t get out of bed in the morning, can’t follow through on a commitment, can’t stay organized, can’t see anything through to completion. Everybody loves him, nobody respects him. He’ll draw a crowd, but they won’t follow him because he’s not going anywhere, he’s not a leader. A wife who’s married to this guy, eventually, he becomes not so cute, not so funny, not so clever. He becomes profoundly annoying. She’s tired of the jokes and the good times and the “everything’s funny and aren’t I clever and cute?” She wants a real man she can depend on. She gets sick of it."
