I was with you until this:
With this said it's not said that a believer should compel a non-believer to follow any certain tenant or prospect that he do not believe is right or that non-christians should in anything be expected to act as christians. Yet we are to be leading examples rather than following imitators in our community, head rather than tail. There's no reason to have a low profile.
From there, I really did try to continue, but got so confused I had no clue what you were trying to say. I think I know what you're saying, but it's so garbled I really can't be sure, and I am hesitant to respond when I don't understand you.
Let me say that I agree with you that the Church should lead by example. And yes, as Christians we should not force non-believers to practice what we do. Paul said this at least once in his Epistles (I can only think of one letter, but there may be more I'm not thinking of right now).
You seem to think that allowing gay marriage would have MORE of a negative effect on society than all of the other sins that we allow. But you are vague about what exactly that means, or what you expect. I honestly can't imagine how allowing gay people to get married would be any worse than allowing adulterers, fornicators, prostitutes, or any manner of people, to get married, when it is obvious from the words "I do" that they DON"T.
I am not being flippant here. I really don't grok this "fall of western civilization" that you and others seem to be certain will happen if and when we legalize gay marriage. Has western civilization not already fallen? Is it not already lost completely? Are we not already damned without Christ? To me, it's like you're in a boat made of swiss cheese, with one plug at the bottom, and you're saying, "No, we can't pull this one plug, or we'll sink." Honey, this ship has SUNK! The filth of sin has already infested this world beyond your ability to save, beyond the ability of the US legal system to save. Removing that plug in the bottom, or keeping it in, will not change the status of that boat. The only way you're gonna survive the flood is by Jesus. If you think that swiss cheese boat is going to save you, you're more screwed up than the gays getting married. At least they don't think their marriage will "save" them.
On the other hand, removing that plug may help some people in the here and now. This is where my allegory breaks down. Because the boat allegory only works in terms of the afterlife. With regards to gay marriage, I'm not talking about the afterlife, I'm talking about rights in THIS life. Since you believe that gays will be damned anyway, why not let them enjoy equal rights while they are in this life?
This is exactly what Christ taught. You see, the Pharisees taught that poor people were poor because it was God's punishment. They deserved their plight, as a retribution for their sins. For that reason, they would withhold charity, thinking that they were undeserving. Jesus pointed out that none of us are "deserving," and therefore it is our duty, as Christians, to feed the hungry and care for the poor. You'll notice that Jesus never said we only had to help the poor people who were also Christian. Jesus never said, "If you have two coats, and your neighbor has none, give him one of yours, but only if he's willing to work for it and not a drunkard or tweaker." There are no caveats in Jesus' command of charity. Jesus said we must extend charity to EVERYONE, whether or not they were "deserving" of it. This is why the Pharisees hated him so much -- because they only wanted to look out for the saved. They didn't want those who weren't part of the "elect" (which then was just the Jews) to have justice. Jesus reminded them that Justice came from God, and it was up to God who could receive Justice. If God wanted to grant it to everyone, that was His prerogative.
Likewise, it is not up to us to decide who gets to have God's grace and who doesn't. I am very glad I don't have to make those decisions. I leave it to God. All I am commanded to do is to care for my neighbor, even my enemy.
And if gays aren't your enemies, who is?