A
There are things that I like and don't like about eHarmony.
Here's what I like:
-I think it's one of the largest sites by number of members.
-I met a guy on eHarmony who I've become good friends with. He was also on another site that I was on but I totally missed his profile. On eHarmony they send you matches, so it causes you to consider people you wouldn't if you were looking through profiles.
-I have a pretty strict age and geography limit. On eHarmony I never have to worry about being contacted by middle aged men on the other side of the world saying that God's told them to marry me (something that happens a lot on other sites).
-The profiles have questions that are pretty telling like "What are the most important things in your life."
-It's kind of fun. You never know when you'll get a new match and what they're going to say. Then you send them some multiple choice questions and then you answer there's and then you move on to the next step.
BUT, I've been thinking hard about this, and here's what I don't like.
-I think it's probably the most expensive internet dating sites.
-Beware, beware, beware of auto-renewal. This means that once your time has expired they will recharge your credit card for more time, unless you turn auto-renew off, because auto-renew is a default setting.
-I'm not so sure about the whole "compatibility test" thing. First of all, I believe that sucessful relationships have less to do with compatibility and more to do with who the two people are in the first place. Staying married to someone is largely about how seriously one takes marriage and how mature they are and whatnot, rather than how one does on a personality test. This is why couples who live together before they're married have a higher divorce rate. Even though they have a better opportuntity to find out how well they can live together, they have less respect for the institution of marriage, which is why they're more likely to get divorced. I learned that in university (which was a secular universtiy, by the way.) Furthermore, although eHarmony's founder, Neil Warren is a psychologist and he says he based his test on years of researching happily married couples. However, for his test to be considered scientifically legit, it has to be subjected to a study to be reviewed by other psychologist. This is something he has not been able to do, even though he's believed to have tried. Furthermore, Dr. Henry Cloud (a Christian pyschologist that wrote the book I'm always talking about) takes the opposite approach thinking the best way to find the right person is just to meet as many people as possible and find out who you click with. See, a guy who lives within a reasonable distance of me only needs to fit four criteria for me to meet agree to meet him. It's like, just introduce me to the guy and I'll decide if I'm compatable or not. One of my favourite sites, Christianmingle.com, has a personality test which sorts people into one of 4 colours. They describe what each colour is like, but instead of matching people up with the same colour they have a brief list of the pros and cons of each colour being in a relationship with each other colour. I like this because I am a yellow, and it says in a yellow-white relationship "White can tire of yellow's noise. Yellow can tire of white's lack of enthusiasim." So if a guy's a white and he can really identify with that statement, then they should stay away from me, because I find that when guys don't like me, that's the main reason why.
Here's what I like:
-I think it's one of the largest sites by number of members.
-I met a guy on eHarmony who I've become good friends with. He was also on another site that I was on but I totally missed his profile. On eHarmony they send you matches, so it causes you to consider people you wouldn't if you were looking through profiles.
-I have a pretty strict age and geography limit. On eHarmony I never have to worry about being contacted by middle aged men on the other side of the world saying that God's told them to marry me (something that happens a lot on other sites).
-The profiles have questions that are pretty telling like "What are the most important things in your life."
-It's kind of fun. You never know when you'll get a new match and what they're going to say. Then you send them some multiple choice questions and then you answer there's and then you move on to the next step.
BUT, I've been thinking hard about this, and here's what I don't like.
-I think it's probably the most expensive internet dating sites.
-Beware, beware, beware of auto-renewal. This means that once your time has expired they will recharge your credit card for more time, unless you turn auto-renew off, because auto-renew is a default setting.
-I'm not so sure about the whole "compatibility test" thing. First of all, I believe that sucessful relationships have less to do with compatibility and more to do with who the two people are in the first place. Staying married to someone is largely about how seriously one takes marriage and how mature they are and whatnot, rather than how one does on a personality test. This is why couples who live together before they're married have a higher divorce rate. Even though they have a better opportuntity to find out how well they can live together, they have less respect for the institution of marriage, which is why they're more likely to get divorced. I learned that in university (which was a secular universtiy, by the way.) Furthermore, although eHarmony's founder, Neil Warren is a psychologist and he says he based his test on years of researching happily married couples. However, for his test to be considered scientifically legit, it has to be subjected to a study to be reviewed by other psychologist. This is something he has not been able to do, even though he's believed to have tried. Furthermore, Dr. Henry Cloud (a Christian pyschologist that wrote the book I'm always talking about) takes the opposite approach thinking the best way to find the right person is just to meet as many people as possible and find out who you click with. See, a guy who lives within a reasonable distance of me only needs to fit four criteria for me to meet agree to meet him. It's like, just introduce me to the guy and I'll decide if I'm compatable or not. One of my favourite sites, Christianmingle.com, has a personality test which sorts people into one of 4 colours. They describe what each colour is like, but instead of matching people up with the same colour they have a brief list of the pros and cons of each colour being in a relationship with each other colour. I like this because I am a yellow, and it says in a yellow-white relationship "White can tire of yellow's noise. Yellow can tire of white's lack of enthusiasim." So if a guy's a white and he can really identify with that statement, then they should stay away from me, because I find that when guys don't like me, that's the main reason why.
