Online/Long Distance Relationships

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I

iraasuup

Guest
#21
#21
It's like buying a house. I could VOW to you that I will pay off the house over 25 years. But that doesn't make the house mine. Unless there is some kind of legal document proving my ownership and transfer of funds, then I have no claim over said house.

I KNOW that God's law is different to the laws of the land, I get that! I really do.. BUT we do live in the world, and just as everyone else, we are required to adhere to the laws of the land, we still have to pay taxes and buy groceries. Just because we're Christian, doesn't make us a law unto ourselves...

Imagine if I walked into a supermarket and said.. well God made all of this produce, and I'm his child, so in His eyes, Im entitled to it, He made it for me to enjoy, so I'm just gonna take it. Or, if I said, 'Nah, I'm not gonna pay taxes'. God provided me with this job, and therefore He intends for me to have all of the money from it, afterall I'm working hard to earn it, and I'm giving a portion of it back to Him, so I dont have to pay taxes' Do you really think that argument would fly? NO WAY! It's the SAME thing as the 'married in God's eyes' arguement.

We cannot live in this world, and be examples to others on how to live, if we choose to be a law unto ourselves and not respect the authorities put in place. We DO NOT have to agree with their policies- but we DO need to respect them. See Romans: (I posted it in a bunch of versions.. take your pick- but the point is clear.. ALL AUTHORITIES are appointed by God. If you choose not to submit to them, then God sees it as you not submitting to Him).

Romans 13:1-2

New International Version (NIV)

Submission to Governing Authorities

13 Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. 2 Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves

Romans 13:1-2

New King James Version (NKJV)

Submit to Government

13 Let every soul be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and the authorities that exist are appointed by God. 2 Therefore whoever resists the authority resists the ordinance of God, and those who resist will bring judgment on themselves.

Romans 13:1-2

King James Version (KJV)

13 Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God.
2 Whosoever therefore resisteth the power, resisteth the ordinance of God: and they that resist shall receive to themselves damnation.

Romans 13:1-2

New Living Translation (NLT)

Respect for Authority

13 Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God. 2 So anyone who rebels against authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and they will be punished.
 
I

iraasuup

Guest
#22
#22
It's like buying a house. I could VOW to you that I will pay off the house over 25 years. But that doesn't make the house mine. Unless there is some kind of legal document proving my ownership and transfer of funds, then I have no claim over said house.

I KNOW that God's law is different to the laws of the land, I get that! I really do.. BUT we do live in the world, and just as everyone else, we are required to adhere to the laws of the land, we still have to pay taxes and buy groceries. Just because we're Christian, doesn't make us a law unto ourselves...

Imagine if I walked into a supermarket and said.. well God made all of this produce, and I'm his child, so in His eyes, Im entitled to it, He made it for me to enjoy, so I'm just gonna take it. Or, if I said, 'Nah, I'm not gonna pay taxes'. God provided me with this job, and therefore He intends for me to have all of the money from it, afterall I'm working hard to earn it, and I'm giving a portion of it back to Him, so I dont have to pay taxes' Do you really think that argument would fly? NO WAY! It's the SAME thing as the 'married in God's eyes' arguement.

We cannot live in this world, and be examples to others on how to live, if we choose to be a law unto ourselves and not respect the authorities put in place. We DO NOT have to agree with their policies- but we DO need to respect them. See Romans: (I posted it in a bunch of versions.. take your pick- but the point is clear.. ALL AUTHORITIES are appointed by God. If you choose not to submit to them, then God sees it as you not submitting to Him).

Romans 13:1-2

New International Version (NIV)

Submission to Governing Authorities

13 Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. 2 Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves

Romans 13:1-2

New King James Version (NKJV)

Submit to Government

13 Let every soul be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and the authorities that exist are appointed by God. 2 Therefore whoever resists the authority resists the ordinance of God, and those who resist will bring judgment on themselves.

Romans 13:1-2

King James Version (KJV)

13 Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God.
2 Whosoever therefore resisteth the power, resisteth the ordinance of God: and they that resist shall receive to themselves damnation.

Romans 13:1-2

New Living Translation (NLT)

Respect for Authority

13 Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God. 2 So anyone who rebels against authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and they will be punished.[/quote]
 
I

iraasuup

Guest
#23
#23
Also, to take this topic on a slightly different approach let me ask 'why'?

WHY do people choose to not 'legally' get married? I know it's not about the ceremony, BUT you can still have a lovely- God centered wedding. But why do the people who choose to use the 'we're married in Gods eyes' arguement do so? Is there a fear of actually making a public commitment? Is it because 'getting out' would be SOOOO MUCH easier if things don't work out? I'm IN NO WAY trying to upset anyone, I am however, trying to understand the whole concept.

I struggle to comprehend why people think they 'don't need to/shouldn't/whatever' have their marriage union legally recognised? I just dont understand it and I'm trying to. So, please explain if you can.

'Marriage' as God intended it to be is fast becoming a dying institution in society today. We should be taking a stand for it not messing around with it and making our own rules up about it. I simply don't understand.
 
G

GRA

Guest
#24
#24
Jullianna said:
God doesn't need it, but worldly authorities tend to want it, especially if a person is from another country. People in some countries have two ceremonies for this very reason.
Click to expand...
iraasuup said:
No! They are not. We are required to obey the laws of the land...are we not? God commands us to respect the authority put in place on earth too.

They may have made 'vows' to one another, but that doesn't make them LEGALLY married. In order to be LEGALLY recognised as 'married' then there needs to a marriage certificate, certified by celebrant/minister and the GOVERNMENT of your state.

Marriage in 'God's eyes' would be LEGALLY married, as God has commanded us to respect the laws of the land also. I could make a vow to someone that I will love them forever and never leave them, but it doesn't make me 'married' legally or otherwise... I'm sorry, but it just doesn't.
Click to expand...
Perhaps I should have not used the word 'legally'...???

Marriage is an institution made by God - not man. I was speaking strictly "from God's point of view"...

A man and woman, having exchanged vows -- as far as God is concerned - they are married.

Whether anyone else recognizes the marriage is beside the point -- to God - they are married.

Any other recognition is for another purpose.

"For the purpose of God, the vows are enough."

That is essentially all I was trying to say.

Sorry for the confusion... :confused:

However, as long as you brought it up...

The 'recognition' of marriage - by man - is OK. :)

The 'permission' to marry - by man - is NOT. :eek:

.
 
G

GRA

Guest
#25
#25
iraasuup said:
It's like buying a house...
Click to expand...
Sorry ----- NOT at all a good example...

("Just sayin'...")

.
 
O

OFM

Guest
#26
#26
agree the state has no need to be involed in marridge at all.
 
G

GRA

Guest
#27
#27
iraasuup said:
Also, to take this topic on a slightly different approach let me ask 'why'?

WHY do people choose to not 'legally' get married? I know it's not about the ceremony, BUT you can still have a lovely- God centered wedding. But why do the people who choose to use the 'we're married in Gods eyes' arguement do so? Is there a fear of actually making a public commitment? Is it because 'getting out' would be SOOOO MUCH easier if things don't work out? I'm IN NO WAY trying to upset anyone, I am however, trying to understand the whole concept.

I struggle to comprehend why people think they 'don't need to/shouldn't/whatever' have their marriage union legally recognised? I just dont understand it and I'm trying to. So, please explain if you can.

'Marriage' as God intended it to be is fast becoming a dying institution in society today. We should be taking a stand for it not messing around with it and making our own rules up about it. I simply don't understand.
Click to expand...
Some folks do not believe that anyone who is not God (i.e., government institution) has the right or authority to 'grant' a marriage -- to "give permission" to marry ----- which is essentially what a marriage certificate is...

.
 
I

iraasuup

Guest
#28
#28
Did you bother to read the rest of my threads?

I know what you're trying to say, I simply disagree, and according to scripture, it seems God would too.

I showed scripture before. Clearly we are to submit to the laws of the land, if we don't God sees it as us not submitting to Him. That's very dangerous territory to be entering.

Secondly,how is the rest of the world supposed to see us as being any different to them, or as an example of the 'right way' to live, if we are essentially not living any different to them?

Thirdly, what is the purpose of choosing to not 'marry' legally? I struggle to understand the concept, of why people find it such a big deal to have their union legally recognised? There must be some underlying reason that they choose to not 'get married' in the convential way.

I realise we live under a grace and not a law, and that as Christians we should be concerned about pleasing God, but I dont see that as an excuse for saying certain things 'don't matter' because God sees it differently, because based on scripture, it's evident He doesn't.

I may have to agree to disagree on this, not trying to rattle any cages.. but I honestly don't believe just 'moving in with one another and making private vows' makes you any more married than moving into McDonalds makes you a hamburger. It just makes no sense.
 
I

iraasuup

Guest
#29
#29
It's not permission -it's public declaration. A certifcate to DECLARE YOU ARE MARRIED.

NOT permission. There is a HUGE difference. But anyway I have given my thoughts.

I know I would not be wanting God to see me as not submitting to Him... because I choose not to recognise the laws of the land... DANGEROUS territory if you ask me.

I'M DONE HERE!
 
I

iraasuup

Guest
#30
#30
Here's another question:

I am currently separated. The law here in Australia requires a couple to have been 'separated' 12 mths before they can divorce.

Okay, so obviously Im not ready to consider a new relationship, but even if I was and I had healed enough emotionally etc I still couldn't pursue another relationship because I am STILL married. If I met a wonderful guy next week, I would have no place accepting a date from him, or pursuing any kind of relatonship while I am still legally married, yet based on the argument portrayed above many would consider it fine as I would be considered 'divorced in God's eyes'.
I have actually had people tell me that very thing. That I could date right now if I wanted to because based on the situation in which my marriage fell apart, that in Gods eyes Im already divorced, so theres no issue. I simply disagree. It's not EASY but I have to do what is right.
It's not always about what WE want..I think thats what needs to be made clear here. We get so caught up in what WE want, we forget about what pleases God.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#31
#31
Interesting how far twisting the words and thoughts of others and running with it can take us from the OP, isn't it....*smh*
 
I

iraasuup

Guest
#32
#32
I was just thinking too Jullianna how far off the original topic this had become... sorry to derail the thread.

Just had to express my thoughts on the said de-railed topic. But anyway, back to the Original topic... long distance relationships... yep, been there, done that... would I do it again? That would depend...

Online. No. I have no objections to 'meeting' someone online. But I wouldnt enter into a relationship with them unless we were both living in reasonably close proxmity to one another to allow us to be able to conduct a 'normal' relationship... spending time with each other etc.

I've done the whole long distance thing, and it's hard, and I do believe it CAN work, but I have learnt A LOT from my last relationship, and as a result have made a concious choice to do things very differently in my next relationship.
 
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I

iraasuup

Guest
#33
#33
Jullianna said:
Interesting how far twisting the words and thoughts of others and running with it can take us from the OP, isn't it....*smh*
Click to expand...

Also not really sure what you mean here by 'twisting', cos I don't believe that ever occured.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#34
#34
GRA said:
Perhaps I should have not used the word 'legally'...???

Marriage is an institution made by God - not man. I was speaking strictly "from God's point of view"...

A man and woman, having exchanged vows -- as far as God is concerned - they are married.

Whether anyone else recognizes the marriage is beside the point -- to God - they are married.

Any other recognition is for another purpose.

"For the purpose of God, the vows are enough."

That is essentially all I was trying to say.

Sorry for the confusion... :confused:

However, as long as you brought it up...

The 'recognition' of marriage - by man - is OK. :)

The 'permission' to marry - by man - is NOT. :eek:

.
Click to expand...
I am baffled as to how you could possibly have assumed that I don't believe marriage to absolutely be a God thing or that I was in some way questioning God's recognition of their vows. That's quite a stretch.

The poster appears to have worded her post as she did for specific reasons and her words may not actually conflict when considered more carefully. Sole point. Period.
 
I

iraasuup

Guest
#37
#37
Also glad to hear it wasn't me haha, because 'twisting words' is the last thing I wish to do...for anybody!
 
H

Holyartist

Guest
#38
#38
Long distance relationships reach a point where they either have to end or someone has to move. Of course, if a person wants to have a lot of time without the other person and a lot of anticipation about when they see each other next, I guess it could work for those allergic to real time committment. : )
 
H

Holyartist

Guest
#39
#39
Re: married before God

The scenario where you are married before God and have not sought out a secular documentation of said marriage only worked for me in a movie where the couple was separated by war and the local pastor had died. (Name the movie for bonus points)
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#40
#40
I was thinking more of the movie where a young couple was stranded on a deserted island, Holyartist. :)

One of the toughest things about long distance relationships is how to convey your honest feelings for someone and open up to them as easily as you can in person. It's more difficult to read people online. They will say one thing, then behave in a way that leads you to completely doubt their sincerity, which underminds trust..and it's downhill from there. I think that's why it is so important for me to know them as a friend first or at least observe them from a distance as to how they relate to others for a time.

 
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