Flight316,
Two types of guys would ask this question:
1) Someone who wants to live a godly life
2) Someone who wants an OK to have sex
I believe that you want to live a godly life. Sorry about your breakup, and I pray that God may see you through all your struggles.
Also, I trust that you have done everything to salvage your marriage, because God is serious about marriage relationships. (It's sad how people pick up and drop partners these days.)
I haven't had sex in almost two years, and I'm a guy.
I appreciate your openness and your willing to stay celibate so far.
Whoa! That sounds weird when you type it out loud.
I'm not surprised that some women on this thread felt that your words are strange. I don't blame them as they are designed differently (and wonderfully).
Being a guy, I know what you're going through. Guys are turned on by sight and there is much temptation at every turn, which can lead to a desire for sex.
Now that you are single again, you are prone to the greatest temptations in this area.
However, a godly man is disciplined with his eyes.
Job 31:1
1"I made a covenant with my eyes1 not to look lustfully at a girl.(NIV)
Our eyes, ears and tongues are gateways to our hearts.
The condition of our hearts is determined by what we allow to enter through our eyes and ears, and what we allow to leave through our tongues.
The Bible instructs us to guard our hearts.
Proverbs 4
23Above all else, guard31 your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.32
24Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips.
25Let your eyes33 look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you.
26Make level paths for your feet34 and take only ways that are firm.
27Do not swerve to the right or the left;35 keep your foot from evil.
Anyway I think that celibacy makes me mean sometimes.
Meanness is a manifestation of Pride. Pride is a sin because it defiles us. It hurts us more than we hurt others.
Mark 7
21For from within, out of men's hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery,
22greed,16 malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly.
23All these evils come from inside and make a man 'unclean.' "
Sin comes from within our hearts and is our choice. Our sinful acts are due to OUR moral decline.
Therefore we cannot blame our situations or circumstances.
We must own up.
Therefore meanness does not result from lack of sex. It is something that you choose to do.
Some of my female friends seem to think so too.
It's time to hang out with Christian men, and share your temptations with them.
I do not know if your lifestyle is contributing to your sexual frustration. The media (tv, movies, celebrities, magazines, internet, etc) influences our lifestyles these days. They are obviously into showbiz and bank on sex to attract attention. The media makes a person feel self-centered, and incomplete without a sexual partner, and we often buy their lies.
Sex is a means to an end. Sex is not our purpose in life.
Agreed that we are sexual beings, but more than that we are designed to love others- the way Christ loved us.
Prayers and God Bless!