How hard is it to find a Christian girl that's my age that's a virgin.

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Virginity is precious. Virginity is awesome. I find it troublesome to be the focus of a relationship, but everyone wants what they want I suppose. It's almost like trying to find someone with blinders on...tunnel vision..

Seems like we would have more successful relationships with others if we looked at what they do bring to us rather than what they may not. I don't know. I doubt that any of us is interested in being with someone we believe to have been with anyone and everyone, physically and/or emotionally. Though, as a woman, emotionally would bother me far more.
 
Dothack, I used to come on this forum a few years ago and you were around then asking the same questions. I was actually surprised to see you still here. Let me tell you a little story.

I used to skateboard when I was younger, and when you are just starting out at a new hobby it can be tricky to get the hang of it. One of the many beginner moves that all skateboarders learn is the Kick flip, you know where the board does a full rotation and you land back on it and hopefully keep rolling. Now at this point i was still pretty young and my legs werent strong enough to manipulate the board in the ways I wanted. At least thats what I thought was the issue when after days and days of not being able to kick flip.

Though one day I was skateboarding by myself and I was just so tired of trying to kickflip I didnt want to go on anymore. I pretty much gave up mid-attempt at the trick and only put half of my effort into. Lo and behold, the board did a full kickflip and I landed on it! I fell off right after but it was the best I had ever done! The reason I couldnt accomplish what I wanted before was because I was kicking too hard since I thought I wasn't strong enough. The truth was that I was strong enough the whole time and all I needed to do was let the board do the work for me.
 
Statistically speaking, do not expect many people to be virgins after age 17. And unless the woman has split from a previous marriage, or has a kid in tow, don't figure on getting a definitive answer if you ask her.

In the olden days on a farm you got married at 17 and started making new farm hands right away. Staying a virgin for marriage was straightforward. Waiting until your twenties to get married is a different ball of wax. Compared to sorting through previous marriage baggage, children, financial, medical history, and recreational drug use, the virgin thing is pretty insignificant. Even selecting for "bona fide Christian" is going to narrow your prospects a lot.
 
I guess the nagging feeling in the back of my head is....if a guy is having difficulty finding a virgin girlfriend, could it be that he is not yet in a place where God can trust him with such a treasure? Could it be that even though a guy is "technically" a virgin,he may not be free from all sexual impurities and addictions? If not, could God be protecting such ladies from this?
 
Course, it could just be that I'm not acreeper that goes around asking all the girls at church if they are virgin or not. :p
 
Totally disagree! There are still Christian girls out there who are saving themselves for marriage
( Including me)...I kn. nowadays losing your phone is worse than losing your virginity. However, you need to be open minded because you don't know who God wants you to marry. Just like in the Bible, God told Hosea to marry a prostitute.
 
Okay so if I did find a girl that I like that was interested in me. Would she be fine if with it I asked her to get tested for stds?
 
Some states require that couples get tested before the state issues a marriage license I think
 
the sad thing is he may overlook a great opportunity to meet a great girl, who may have made some mistakes in her life, but he chooses to treat her like "damaged" goods" because of something he may not even understand the circumstances of.
 
dothackzero said:
Okay so if I did find a girl that I like that was interested in me. Would she be fine if with it I asked her to get tested for stds?
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The fact that you even said that, just..wow..you do not need to be entertaining a relationship with any young lady..1)finding a mate has become your idol 2) you seem to be extremely superficoal by hoping you find a virgen..when you are struggling with porn...your body is just as defiled, if mot even more than that 'non virgen' gal you turn your nose up at 3) i cannot believe you think its your business to go asking girls if they are std free or virgens, not unless you are in a committed relationship..and i say this not yo be mean but, wgat gives you the idea that you are entitled someway to a pure gal/sexually speaking when you pollute your mind,eyes and soul with porn filth? you do not deserve that..you need to grow a littke bit, and learn yo gget past your shallow ways before you can even be a friend to any young lady..
 
rauleetoe said:
The fact that you even said that, just..wow..you do not need to be entertaining a relationship with any young lady..1)finding a mate has become your idol 2) you seem to be extremely superficoal by hoping you find a virgen..when you are struggling with porn...your body is just as defiled, if mot even more than that 'non virgen' gal you turn your nose up at 3) i cannot believe you think its your business to go asking girls if they are std free or virgens, not unless you are in a committed relationship..and i say this not yo be mean but, wgat gives you the idea that you are entitled someway to a pure gal/sexually speaking when you pollute your mind,eyes and soul with porn filth? you do not deserve that..you need to grow a littke bit, and learn yo gget past your shallow ways before you can even be a friend to any young lady..
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this might be a little harsh...i mean if dating is for the purpose of finding a spouse the the STD thing is fair after a point. Sure maybe not the first 1-12 dates but eventually its a question that needs to be asked. I mean I understand forgiving people for past mistakes and all but when it comes down to my own personal health and safety, well your mistakes can be pretty important. I do agree on most of the rest of it though.
 
A few things:

1. The chances of finding a girl that's a virgin above the age of 21 is near impossible.

2. The chances of finding a girl without a kid above the age of 24 is near impossible.

3. The chances that either 1 or 2 occur while also the girl being attractive (in whatever way you find a woman attractive) is near impossible.

4. Good luck
 
DABEARS8519 said:
A few things:

1. The chances of finding a girl that's a virgin above the age of 21 is near impossible.

2. The chances of finding a girl without a kid above the age of 24 is near impossible.

3. The chances that either 1 or 2 occur while also the girl being attractive (in whatever way you find a woman attractive) is near impossible.

4. Good luck
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The sad part is that this is very true for our time and age. Although, I am the type of person who, depending on the personality of the woman, would accept them with open arms and lovingly, even if they were not a virgin and had a child. They would need to fit the personality type and walk with God in honesty and truth the day I meet, but I hold nothing of her past against her, and I love children and would be the happiest man to help raise a child. To each his own however.
 
Virginity is an odd thing in that no one really cares about their own til its gone. The majority of society views it as a burden that should be shed as soon as possible and many do go down that route, I did too. However once you grow up and mature and think back about how and when you lost it, it can be and is regrettable for a lot of people. The lack of any commitment or love really cheapens the initial thrill from the experience and many, myself included, are left kinda wanting a do-over. Not insomuch that Im no longer a virgin because even mistakes like that help make you the person you are, but just that perhaps it had been given away not so recklessly and under better conditions with someone I at least loved or cared for.
 
Nautilus said:
this might be a little harsh...i mean if dating is for the purpose of finding a spouse the the STD thing is fair after a point. Sure maybe not the first 1-12 dates but eventually its a question that needs to be asked. I mean I understand forgiving people for past mistakes and all but when it comes down to my own personal health and safety, well your mistakes can be pretty important. I do agree on most of the rest of it though.
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it may sound harsh, yet it seems to be the only thing dothack talks about..if you only talk of this, maybe it has become an idol to you, and you had better be ok with getting tested as well..its,only fair, i did that once for a gal..never again will i be tested without them being willing to do the same...because how ekse can you be in the clear? regarding to yourself and your significant other...if you ask like ibsaid, be willing to be tested as well
 
as Isabella Tilney said here are still christian girls out there that actually save themselves for their husbands! I happen to be one of them... also i would like to say that.. there are girls who made ​​mistakes in the past .. I've seen it with friends ... that before they met the love of God made ​​many mistakes .. but now are new creatures as the word says.. maybe there are things that can not be recovered.. from my point of view it is good to glorify God with our actions, thoughts and body as the temple of the Holy Spirit, is why we must take care to honor the Lord in this way too .. so wait on the Lord and keep praying for the woman God has to give you as a wife.
 
I understand the OP wanting a virgin because of his own beliefs, but we aren't supposed to judge others,that's not our job but Gods job, Be thankful that he sent Jesus or we all would be judged and condemned to hell, why does the original poster think he should judge or has the right to judge a girl just because she is no longer a virgin and now has a child? People make mistakes,they sin, all of us fall short of the glory of God, This could be a great person that God has put in his life and he rejects her because he feels it's his place to judge her past, not to be harsh but that doesn't sound very christian like, apparently she doesn't deserve a chance to get to know someone because in his eyes she's "damaged" , this sounds more like Islam then Christianity
 
In many middle eastern cultures, not trying to be gross, but if a girl does not bleed the first time she has sex, she is considered damaged, terrible things are done to women there to make sure they do or because they dont, I hate to see that seem to be the only thing important in this case, original poster, why not take a chance and go out with this girl, go on a date, it doesn't mean you have to marry her, find out her story, what her situation is, How do you know she didn't turn her life over to Christ? if she did it doesn't matter about the past, she has a child, this is a blessing from God, not something to be looked down on, Kids are awesome, do you have any idea how difficult it is for single moms? and then people look at them like something is wrong with them?
 
Hello. I wanted to tell you. I love you sweetheart. But I want to make sure you are STD free. Here is a Quest Diagnostics coupon. Wink wink. Yea thats exactly what you should do Dothack. Insert Sarcasm.
 
dothackzero said:
Okay so if I did find a girl that I like that was interested in me. Would she be fine if with it I asked her to get tested for stds?
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I guess it would depend on the girl. Everyone reacts differently.

To the rest of you (I'm not saying this based on this thread alone, it's in general.):
Yeah, he talks about this stuff A LOT here. There is no denying that one. Is his whole life on CC though? I would hope not. Maybe he just talks about it here because he's not comfortable talking about it elsewhere. Surely he has other things going on in his life outside of CC though. I'm not aware of anyone here knowing him outside of CC. So how many people here truly know him?

He's seeking advice and asking some sincere questions, like the one above. I'm all for truth and being honest with people. However, there is a certain amount of tact that should be used. I think we need to try to support and encourage this guy, not mock him.

Also, once again, I think people try to push him into doing something that he can't handle. It's obvious he would be uncomfortable being with a girl who isn't a virgin. That may or may not change for him. That's between God and him. There is no sin in desiring to marry a virgin. It's his choice.
Yes, it absolutely eliminates a lot of women out there. Once again though, it's his choice.
 
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