Need prayer for marriage

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Stephen

Guest
#1
#1
Hello All, I was here on this forum beginning in March of 2011 with prayer requests for my marriage. After months of my wife telling me she wanted a divorce she decided to come back together in Novemember.

She spent the next several months just praising me for being such a good husband and father and not having a good reason for separating and I was feeling very good about the marriage. She began attending church with me and the boys again, stopped going out with her friends all the time, gave ours sons a lot of attention, etc.

Unbelievably about 2 months ago she started to show an interest in being with her freinds again, listening to awful music, and started to miss church a lot. Well Saturday she tells me she doesn't feel like she can be herself around me and wants out of the marriage. I asked to go to counseling together and she replied that she would think about.

To make things worse I am a stay-at-home dad with 4 and 6 year old boys getting ready for finals and one more semester of pta school. I have no way of providing for my sons financially.

Please pray for my wife. I believe she is turning from the faith and to the world. She has always been somewhat selfish but now it is even worse.

Thank you
 
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shekaniah

Guest
#2
#2
I'm sorry to hear about how things are going.
I will pray for you, your wife and kids.

May all the verses she has ever read or listened to play as a sweet song in her heart, mind and spirit.

Isaiah 55:11
So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.

Take away oppertunies that would stray her away from her family.
Give her a revelation of how much her children need her.
Show Stephen how to love her as Christ loved the church.
In Jesus Name, Amen
 
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Stephen

Guest
#3
#3
Thank you Shekaniah for the wonderful verse and for your words of prayer. I do believe in the power of prayer and have been praying for her and our family and for guidance.

God Bless
 
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Stephen

Guest
#4
#4
Talked with my wife last night hoping for some answers and signs that she wants to work on things. Sadly, she told me that she will soon move out and separate. She will pay the bills for me and the boys to stay in the home until we can sell it. Her reason is that she isn't happy being with me but can't say exactly why.
Breaking my heart she says I'm a "good husband and father and I will meet someone remarry and be happy". She says she knows I love her with all my heart but it just won't work. She tells me she has grown and is now an independent woman.
Please pray for her and our family. I feel so sad and confused because I thought we had a wonderful relationship rarely arguing over the 15years and now it seems to be over. To make the situation even worse is that our sons are only 4 and 6. My heart aches for the pain they will have to endure if this happens.
 
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hopesprings

Guest
#5
#5
Stephen said:
Talked with my wife last night hoping for some answers and signs that she wants to work on things. Sadly, she told me that she will soon move out and separate. She will pay the bills for me and the boys to stay in the home until we can sell it. Her reason is that she isn't happy being with me but can't say exactly why.
Breaking my heart she says I'm a "good husband and father and I will meet someone remarry and be happy". She says she knows I love her with all my heart but it just won't work. She tells me she has grown and is now an independent woman.
Please pray for her and our family. I feel so sad and confused because I thought we had a wonderful relationship rarely arguing over the 15years and now it seems to be over. To make the situation even worse is that our sons are only 4 and 6. My heart aches for the pain they will have to endure if this happens.
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Wow...my heart hurts for you. Being a mom myself, I can never understand how a mother could leave her children behind.:( Children are a blessing from God and should be treasured by both parents.

It does sound like you two have some serious marital problems tho...and just because you haven't really fought in 15 years doesn't mean everything was okay. Well...obviously it wasn't or she wouldn't be talking about leaving for the second time. She hasn't told you what it is about your marriage that she doesn't like? I think you two need to have a very serious and honest talk about what happened and why things are the way that they are now. Her saying that she can't be herself around you, like that is reason enough...is not really a reason. You are her husband and do deserve an honest response for her acting this way...imo, the reason she gave was only an excuse...one that is hard to argue with. Her now considering herself an 'independant woman' somehow does not include her being a responsible woman as well. You need to pray for her and keep seeking a reconciliation. We cannot make people stay with us (even if they did promise to), but you can make sure your heart stays right with God and that you are staying faithful to your wedding vows. Have you ever seen the movie 'Fireproof'? I'm not really one for recommending movies or anything, but there is a book that goes along with the movie that may help out in some areas; it's called the Love Dare. Not saying it will fix everything but God may use it to open your eyes to some things that were, or are, wrong within your marriage. Just a thought.

Will be praying for you and your family.

hopesprings
 
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Stephen

Guest
#6
#6
Thank you hopesprings for prayer and encouraging words.
I will not give up on my wife or stray from our vows. I didn't last year when this happend and my faith is only greater now than it was then. I am waiting for the Christian counselor who saw us last year to call me back. I hope to get an appointment and that she will go with me.

All I can say about the unhappiness from what she has said and it's that we just have different personalities and she can't be herself. Very difficult for me to understand as we have many common interests ie working out together, family time and kidding around a lot with each other.

I do know that she has been having difficulty with her thyroid and is currently taking medication. About 2 months ago she spent an entire day in bed crying. She would only say she is not happy with her life but she knows she should be. I don't know if she is depressed and that is causing these thoughts or what.

I love my wife and children and even though I trust God I have moments of battling fear and heartache.
 
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Stephen

Guest
#7
#7
Yes...Fireproof is an excellent movie with great advice. We saw it when it first came out and both loved and I have also read the book. I always look for ways to communicate my love to her and avoid offending her and says as much. She always tells people I treat her like a princess...I gas and wash her car every week, care for her when not feeling well, fix dinner, whatever it takes. She says she has no doubt I love her but she just want to be married to me anymore and that I will be a great husband to someone else. My wife also adds that she has no desire to ever be married again.
 
Geometar

Geometar

Banned
#8
Nov 22, 2012
626
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#8
Traditional prayer for a married couple

O Merciful God, we beseech Thee ever to remind us that the married state is holy, and that we must keep it so; Grant us Thy grace, that we may continue in faithfulness and love; Increase in us the spirit of mutual understanding and trust, that no quarrel or strife may come between us; Grant us Thy blessings, that we may stand before our fellows and in Thy sight as an ideal family; And finally, by Thy mercy, account us worthy of everlasting life: For Thou art our sanctification, and to Thee we ascribe glory, to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit, now and ever and unto ages of ages. Amen.
 
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Stephen

Guest
#9
#9
Thank you Geometar. Thank you Jesus
 
Shilo

Shilo

Senior Member
#10
Aug 31, 2011
1,985
105
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#10
Your Supernatural Marriage is a book written by Bob and Audrey Meisner. Their marriage was about to end but they turned it over to God and their marriage is better then ever. They now help many other people save their marriages through what they have learned.
 
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Stephen

Guest
#11
#11
Thank you Shilo I will look in to it.
 
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Missfoxieloxie

Guest
#12
#12
I am praying for you and your family...
 
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GreenNnice

Guest
#13
#13
Hebrews 11:1

God bless you for a faith in Jesus thatvis unfailing, Stephen.
You're so good to her, don't let her go unless you KNOW that He is asking you to quit.
Fight now with your said heightened faith, that exeeds your faith more than anytime in your life, ask God to purge out anything wrong in you and let Him know that you are at your end rope and tell God you will accept His answers no matter what but you WANT your wife, not her paying for rent til another house.
4 and 6 ! Tell her you will DO better; I do nor know what this means . Why is she turning selfish? What are you in Love with? Her or something else? Let God work on your heart, Stephen, and, know His work in us is a labor of Love, but we, too, MUST work! We are labourers together with Christ, who is our foundation. Faith, faith, faith ! Plant, water, do NOT give up on this marriage that's been thru so much, tell your wife you got through things before 'I can change,' and, you will get things now too, TOGETHER, with God, who put you two TOGETHER.

I hope you know I Love you, Stephen, this is spoken fearfully from my heart, I fear God ! And, that is the beginning of knowledge and I fear Him who is in me too and that is understanding and I trust Jesus, who saved my soul forevermore the MOMENT I chose Him.

Take a spiritual gifts test , Google it. Get right next to Him now who will lead you through this, I pray this has been received of blessing by you, there is NO condemnation now for those in Christ Jesus .

You are going to be OK, Keep on keeping on being the man of that house, doing your PERFECT to follow Him. Pray ceaselessly, as Scripture states, and, find your perfect in Him, our merciful,cgracious, Love, who is our friend, Scripture says, too, those who have Him in their 'temple.'

Hail, hail, Lion of Judah, how wonderful You are !

Peace, Stephen, may His almighty presence envelope you now (Phil. 4:8) Blessings, brother in Christ, Ed

P.s. you will get through this just fine, with Him. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
PM me, anytime :)
 
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DRNFINO

Guest
#14
#14
Stephen,

It may be hard to understand or realize now that you are not alone; Jesus will never leave your side. When you are praying or crying or just want to scream he is there beside you comforting you. I pray now that Jesus may show his grace on your family and give you the strength, courage and knowledge that you may move in his direction.
 
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psychomom

Guest
#15
#15
I sorrow with you, Stephen. :(
And with your little boys, and with (and for) your wife.

I have been blessed with a happy marriage (thank You, Lord!)
and so have no real life experience with which to counsel you,
but I will say it's been work...to always keep open the lines of communication,
and to say what's on our minds in a loving way,
so no bitterness toward one another will develop.
To forgive completely (and forget...not bringing up past things...)

I realize this situation is beyond those things, but thought it worth a mention
should your wife return (please, Lord!).

You will be in my prayers, and especially your little ones...whom the Lord loves so much. ♥
-ellie
 
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Stephen

Guest
#16
#16
Thank you DRNFINO, GreenNnice, Missfoxieloxie, for prayer and words of wisdom. She asked to talk last night and told me she cant afford to move out so we need to come up with something else. So, asked her why she says she is so unhappy with me that she wants to separate. Her reply was that she can't explain it.
I can't help but to wonder if she is so depressed that she thinks the only way to feel better is to leave the married/family life. I know it is stressful with me in school and two very active boys. But I have shouldered most of that stress because in the past when I worked and she had to care for the boys all day Saturday she couldn't handle it. She called several times every Saturday stressed out. I even had my mom come over to help but it became too much. So I left that job. I have and will continue to do whatever it takes....I love my wife and will not give up on her. I took an oath before God and man. The first time this happend in march 2011 it went as far as divorce papers being served to me and a date set. Things got stretched out a bit because I refused to cooperate. Then suddenly she called me at work and wanted to drop everything.
She has a very stressful job and seems to manage it well. But for some reason the demands of home have been too much. That is the reason I left a great career and became a stay at home dad.
Please pray for her. The only thing I can think of is that she has lost her joy in the Lord and doesn't know what to do. I also ask for prayer that she will go to counseling.
Thank you all for your wisdom and prayer.
 
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GreenNnice

Guest
#17
#17
Stephen said:
Thank you DRNFINO, GreenNnice, Missfoxieloxie, for prayer and words of wisdom. She asked to talk last night and told me she cant afford to move out so we need to come up with something else. So, asked her why she says she is so unhappy with me that she wants to separate. Her reply was that she can't explain it.
I can't help but to wonder if she is so depressed that she thinks the only way to feel better is to leave the married/family life. I know it is stressful with me in school and two very active boys. But I have shouldered most of that stress because in the past when I worked and she had to care for the boys all day Saturday she couldn't handle it. She called several times every Saturday stressed out. I even had my mom come over to help but it became too much. So I left that job. I have and will continue to do whatever it takes....I love my wife and will not give up on her. I took an oath before God and man. The first time this happend in march 2011 it went as far as divorce papers being served to me and a date set. Things got stretched out a bit because I refused to cooperate. Then suddenly she called me at work and wanted to drop everything.
She has a very stressful job and seems to manage it well. But for some reason the demands of home have been too much. That is the reason I left a great career and became a stay at home dad.
Please pray for her. The only thing I can think of is that she has lost her joy in the Lord and doesn't know what to do. I also ask for prayer that she will go to counseling.
Thank you all for your wisdom and prayer.
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Do 'whatever it takes,' and, whatever you do, Stephen, do so for the glory of God :)


Elisha was worn out, tired of running from Jezebel, rink it was, read Kings, Google: elisha kings cave angel , and, therein those 4 words of Elisha having gone to a cave to die, ready to give up, God showed up, spoke to elisha, through an angel ministering, and, nourishment was needed, and, God gave Elisha bread and honey, if I recall it all correctly.

God is the SAME today as yesterday as forevermore. When things look at their worst, with faith, things will not just be best, suddenly, with prayer and fervent following, accepting of His next steps , which is allowig God to search your heart, will come things perfect.

Blessings, and, power from Him, whatever it takes, just do as He leads, faithfully, not what you want to do, whatever that is, but do what He tells you to do. You will know, and, though this situation looks rough, the tempest will be got thru perfectly with His strength relied on all the way through, and, that goes for your 'tempest,' too that is this life for Him we earthly live, before BLINK!, it is over and we are forever with Him. (Read ecclessiastes). Rejoice though on earth, while here, embrace your trials , your suffering, your faith will be quickened, never forget the 'Love' word, too, to your wife, your young kids, and, most importantly, to your God , Lord Jesus who Lives in your heart :)
 
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Stephen

Guest
#18
#18
Thank you GreenNnice. He is a wonderful and magnificant God.
 
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