Let's talk about the REST of the chapter...

[Jullianna]

EPHESIANS 5:

22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
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Verses 22-24 have been discussed extensively in thread after thread after thread in these forums, so let's talk about the REST of the chapter. I've never seen a thread on verses 25 through 33.

THE QUESTION OF THIS THREAD: How does a man love his wife as Christ loves the Church?

 

[Oncefallen]

I can answer that in two words. Self sacrifice.

 

[Grace52]

Good luck, men in general prefer to treat thier wives as servrants. Expecting thier wives to work outside the home, then come home and to all the chores, and child care while the hubby tells her how to do it as he sits in his "bark a lounger". of course, i might have a jaded view

 

[Ritter]

Thinking of wider societal implications. I wonder which half disappeared first.

 

[Descyple]

The 17th century Puritan Thomas Watson had some pretty good ideas of what a loving husband should look like, as seen in the quote below.

""He who is good as a husband is godly. He fills up that relationship with love... The vine twisting its branches about the elm and embracing it may be an emblem of that entire love which should be in the conjugal relationship. A married condition would be sad, if it had cares to embitter it and not love to sweeten it. Love is the best diamond in the marriage ring... The husband should show his love to his wife by covering her infirmities; by avoiding occasions of strife; by sweet, endearing expressions; by pious counsel; by love tokens; by encouraging what he sees amiable and virtuous in her."
- Thomas Watson, A Godly Man's Picture, pg 155-156

 

[Jullianna]

Thinking of wider societal implications. I wonder which half disappeared first.

Excellent question, Ritter. Did men abuse/neglect/demean women first? Or did women stand up and say they didn't like it first?

 

[Sarah_D]

I wonder if it is about provision, husbands providing what we (wives) need to survive both physically and spiritually. I like the idea of my husband reading the Word of God to me at night.. therefore cleansing me by the washing through the Word - making sure my spiritual needs are being met as they also ensure they are keeping themselves holy and blameless (well try our best) by being cleansed by the Word themselves. Loving their wives as their own body represents, to me anyway, that we are well cared for.

I also wonder if it's about being led too.. by our husband as he is led by Jesus Christ..

There's more but i don't want to waffle on.

 

[Ugly]

Good luck, men in general prefer to treat thier wives as servrants. Expecting thier wives to work outside the home, then come home and to all the chores, and child care while the hubby tells her how to do it as he sits in his "bark a lounger". of course, i might have a jaded view

Bitter much? Group all men together and make us all bad. Lovely outlook.

 

[Jullianna]

It was my sincere hope that this thread would serve as more of an encouragement than a criticism. I also thought it would be an opportunity for men who've never seen the rest of the chapter to see it and to hear from other men what they believe it to mean.

We women so often want to know what men think about a thing, but then want to tell them how they should think. I would really like to know what they DO think.

 

[Sarah_D]

I'd like to know what men think too, it would be helpful.

 

[zeroturbulence]

THE QUESTION OF THIS THREAD: How does a man love his wife as Christ loves the Church?

The same way that Jesus loves sinners.


My wife will not be a piece of property to me. She will not be a slave to me either.

1) Jesus called us his friends and not his servants. He said I do not call you servants, I call you friends because a servant does not know what his master is up to and I have kept no secrets from you. (see John 15:15)

So shall I be a friend to my wife and not try to make her my servant or keep things hidden from her.


2) Jesus is always ready to forgive sinners and accept them with love despite all their faults and weaknesses. (see Matt. 18:21-22)

So shall I always be ready to forgive my wife and accept her for who she is.


3) Jesus was willing to lay down his life for us. (see John 15:13)

So shall I be willing to lay down my life for my wife.


4) God said he would never leave us or forsake us. (see Hebrews 13:5)

So shall I promise to never forsake my wife.


5) God promised to comfort us in times of need (see Isaiah 66;13)

So shall I always be there to comfort my wife.


6) Jesus said the greatest among us would be the one who is like the lowest, the one who serves. (see Luke 22:26)

So shall I always aim to please my wife and put her needs before my own.


I could probably go on and on, but you probably get the idea.

 

[djness]

EPHESIANS 5:

22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
=============================================================

Verses 22-24 have been discussed extensively in thread after thread after thread in these forums, so let's talk about the REST of the chapter. I've never seen a thread on verses 25 through 33.

THE QUESTION OF THIS THREAD: How does a man love his wife as Christ loves the Church?

Are you looking for some specific example that a married man should respond and say ''this is how i loved my wife today as Jesus loved the church''?

If that is your question, then no idea, I have never been married.

It's possible I lack the imagination or hypothetical thinking but doesn't the verse answer your question?

28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

 

[Ugly]

I have actually given this scripture to both men and women on this forum. I agree, though, it is not as commonly referred to as the first half. I think there's a reason for that though. Men who may want to be dominate and looking for justification, or women wanting to be more submissive than maybe required, often use the first half of this scripture. Also, many 'feminists' use the first half as a proven justification against the bible. The feminists, and the dominators don't want to acknowledge the last half, for obvious reasons.
Personally, i do try to keep both in mind. But i can say, it does seem hard to find women Truly willing to live out the first half of that scripture. Many women say they will, yet there is often little evidence of it. At least that has been my experience. Which makes sense, according to modern teaching.
Christian women are now taught they are princesses to be chased after and virtually idolized within the marriage as the man caters to this 'special' creation of God. But you can't mesh that with being biblically submissive. The two ideas contradict each other.
Anyways, i got sidetracked i suppose. 0.0
But yes, the second half is just as important as the first and its good of you to bring it up, OP.

 

[Jullianna]

Are you looking for some specific example that a married man should respond and say ''this is how i loved my wife today as Jesus loved the church''?

Not necessarily, married or unmarried is fine. Just wondering what a picture in your mind might look like if you've given much thought to it.

If that is your question, then no idea, I have never been married.

It's possible I lack the imagination or hypothetical thinking but doesn't the verse answer your question?

The verse tells me only the verse and leaves me to determine its meaning based upon only my personal experience with Christ. It doesn't tell me what MEN think it means.

28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

Just as women need to determine whether they are ready to take a shot at what is expected of them scripturally in marriage, it seemed important to ask the same question of the guys. Women and men CLEARLY think differently .

It's interesting to me to catch a glimpse of the male mind on such matters. I could learn some stuff in the process that might affect how I see MY role in any possible marriage. I might see some things I've done wrong or thought wrongly about. Plus, from comments I've read in other threads in these forums and in my personal experience, there are guys who aren't familiar with this passage. I was hoping they, too, might learn something from the godly men of this forum.

 

[zaoman32]

before Jesus died he got down and washed the feet of his disciples. I even believe he described his ministry years, not as a position of honor, but a position of service.

Jesus, literally, sacrificed his life for the church. In the same way, husbands should be willing to sacrifice their own lives, their own desires, for their wives. Unfortunately there are few examples of that. The best place in marriage you can be in is where either couple understands that their marriage is dependent on the others desires and needs, and they are willing to go the extra mile to meet them.

 

[Sarah_D]

I've learned just from this thread that i might some wrong ideas about biblical marriage. Oops.
I appreciate what people have shared because it helps me.
Thanks OP!
I would just like to note that I don't submit because I Have to.. or even because it is required.. I submit because i want to.. of my own free will/volition because it is part of what Love is to me.. to live in freedom with each other.. to give myself freely as Jesus gave His own life freely.

 

[Jullianna]

Wise words, Sarah. When we know Him and His ways and the peace, security and love that explodes in our lives and marriages when we do it His way, it's awesome. People don't know what they are missing when they wrestle with this stuff and don't allow the blessings to flow in their marriages.

 

[Descyple]

Check out this strong poem by Brent Rice about how he wants to love his wife with a "Crucifixion Type Love"

[video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7E9doP6EtHk[/video]

 

[Stephen63]

EPHESIANS 5:

22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
=============================================================

Verses 22-24 have been discussed extensively in thread after thread after thread in these forums, so let's talk about the REST of the chapter. I've never seen a thread on verses 25 through 33.

THE QUESTION OF THIS THREAD: How does a man love his wife as Christ loves the Church?

I can only answer this question with one word: sacrificially. as for the "rest" of the chapter, I can only say this: both husbands and wives in the church needed this teaching, otherwise it wouldn't be there. Just from looking at it, there is waaaaaaay much more detailed teaching to the men than women. Kinda makes you wonder who needed it the most.

 

[Sarah_D]

When we know Him and His ways and the peace, security and love that explodes in our lives and marriages when we do it His way, it's awesome.

Amen Jullianna, it's kinda why i've held off getting married - in my late 20's i thought i'd made a big mistake waiting.. but i held off because i didn't know biblical Love and I didn't know Jesus so i didn't know this wonderful True Love.. Now i am at peace about waiting because i think it's gonna be awesome if i get married. I've not felt that way or known this type of Love until i let the Lord love me His way. Hope that makes sense.