Aproaching girls!

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MYRedeemedinJC

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For the girls: Im wondering, Exactly what is going through your mind when we try to approach you? Have you already said yes, or no in your mind?. :confused:
 
This may just be a guess, but "Oh crap, here comes another one."
 
I don't really approach women with the question in my mind. I would suspect they haven't rehearsed the answer either.
 
I'm not a woman but my observations and experience are that most women believe they can tell upon the first meeting (some have told me the first 30 seconds) whether or not they would date you.

What you have to remember; however, is that they are emotional creatures and as such, have a high propensity for changing their minds even though they are not aware of this very female attribute ;)

All things are possible but you'll need to increase your leadership abilities (e.g. alpha male) so you can lead and feed relationships influencing them to move in directions you want them to go; increase your value as a person to others; manage your speech and appearance; learn social skills and how to hold the attention of others in entertaining and positive ways. If you haven't already, find yourself. Avoid the "friend zone" with women you're interested in dating and learn how to extract yourself from that horrible place, lolol, if you end up in it with a lady you believe God wants you to pursue.

Practice and learn, practice and learn, practice and learn... and remember it's like selling life insurance in the sense it's a numbers game. The more people you interact with: the better your chances. Failure is just the road to success. :)

MYRedeemedinJC said:
For the girls: Im wondering, Exactly what is going through your mind when we try to approach you? Have you already said yes, or no in your mind?. :confused:
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She might be totally oblivious... because she is ticking off her "to-do" and "done" list, remembering if she needs to stop and get gas on the way home or if she needs a loaf of bread or if there is another can of hairspray in the cupboard... while checking her watch to make sure she is not late for pilates.
 
BarlyGurl said:
She might be totally oblivious... because she is ticking off her "to-do" and "done" list, remembering if she needs to stop and get gas on the way home or if she needs a loaf of bread or if there is another can of hairspray in the cupboard... while checking her watch to make sure she is not late for pilates.
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With hopes that a handsome prince charming will approach her today?
 
arwen83 said:
Sometimes.
(yeah not helpful, but it's true)
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I see, so what triggers these no's?? I think i know one of them, definitely one of them is that he smells like a weeks workout with no shower! lol!!! Any more??
 
MYRedeemedinJC said:
With hopes that a handsome prince charming will approach her today?
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Yes ..OF course! just try not to be too discouraged if the look on face belies that you have interrupted complex mental multitasking... and forge ahead in a friendly manner.:D... give her a minute to re-boot.
 
I was never one to decide in a flash if I would ever date someone right then and there. If anything I was always more interested in being friends first. Not dating. Just friends. Then over time, wait and see if any attraction is there, as I get to know him slowly as a friend.

If I ever felt rushed, I'd just say I wasn't interested. But if he wanted to take his time to get to know me un-romantically first, I'd be happy to do just that.

So a short answer. No. I never already had a set-in-stone answer in my mind.
Unless he was somehow rude or manipulative in that first few minutes, but that's obvious...
 
BarlyGurl said:
Yes ..OF course! just try not to be too discouraged if the look on face belies that you have interrupted complex mental multitasking... and forge ahead in a friendly manner.:D... give her a minute to re-boot.
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Thanks, this helps a lot! I will definitely let her press the reboot button! :)!. BUT, is that really what goes through a girls mind on any given day? thats a lot of stuff! :P!! Maybe I just need to multitask better! :P!!. Ha!.
 
Relena7 said:
I was never one to decide in a flash if I would ever date someone right then and there. If anything I was always more interested in being friends first. Not dating. Just friends. Then over time, wait and see if any attraction is there, as I get to know him slowly as a friend.

If I ever felt rushed, I'd just say I wasn't interested. But if he wanted to take his time to get to know me un-romantically first, I'd be happy to do just that.

So a short answer. No. I never already had a set-in-stone answer in my mind.
Unless he was somehow rude or manipulative in that first few minutes, but that's obvious...
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I see.. I hear a lot of girls tell me this is the past. But to be honest I have to say that most guys do not want to be friends first.. and i'm always blatently honest to a girl when it comes to my intention, it saves me a lot of explanations later should I want to change it and make her a girlfriend..
 
MYRedeemedinJC said:
I see, so what triggers these no's?? I think i know one of them, definitely one of them is that he smells like a weeks workout with no shower! lol!!! Any more??
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Haha yeah that's one of them. How presents himself is important to me- like if it shows that he doesn't care about his appearance at all. I just think choice of clothes does say something about a guy. For example, if he was wearing really baggy jeans, a long black t-shirt or hoodie and NY baseball cap- I attribute that with G's and I am not attracted to G's. Some girls might be, but not me. And he may not be one, but am I really gonna give him the benefit of the doubt if he tries to ask me out? No I won't. If that makes me shallow, then I guess I am shallow. Whether or not we like it, how we dress says a lot about ourselves.

I have certain preferences and tastes when it comes to the male species. I am not sure if there are universal triggers for no's, simply because many girl's preferences and tastes are unique. I am looking for someone that I can see myself with; that we compliment each other in some ways- physically is one of them. I am not attracted to big buff weightlifters either, because I would feel tiny compared to him; he wouldn't be suitable for me. I do think of these things if I see a guy looking at me in certain way, or get the hint that they might want to approach me (which isn't very often lol)

One thing that I must add, in the past after getting to know someone who I initially was not attracted to became more attractive to me because of his personality. So its not just looks.
 
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MYRedeemedinJC said:
I see.. I hear a lot of girls tell me this is the past. But to be honest I have to say that most guys do not want to be friends first.. and i'm always blatently honest to a girl when it comes to my intention, it saves me a lot of explanations later should I want to change it and make her a girlfriend..
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That's perfectly fine. If you don't mind the risk of rejection, go for it! :) Plenty of girls out there are into dating as a way to meet.

Some of us are more analytical-minded, and like to take our time before leaping into the water. No biggie.
 
I don't know if I remotely answered your question or if you are more confused then you were before :o
 
arwen83 said:
Haha yeah that's one of them. How presents himself is important to me- like if it shows that he doesn't care about his appearance at all. I just think choice of clothes does say something about a guy. For example, if he was wearing really baggy jeans, a long black t-shirt or hoodie and NY baseball cap- I attribute that with G's and I am not attracted to G's.
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I guess that is the thing about first impressions... you only get to make them once.

Unless you glue on a fake moustache, wear big round glasses, get a haircut and try again. They suspect nothing... :cool:
 
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MYRedeemedinJC said:
For the girls: Im wondering, Exactly what is going through your mind when we try to approach you? Have you already said yes, or no in your mind?. :confused:
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Yes, I always know immediately. I start screaming and flapping my arms. If they don't run away, I know they're a keeper :D
 
Well, here's one single woman you can chat with.

I'm actually looking for a pen pal type, tavelling to, marrying type of story. You can find me at:

Calgary Drop-In Center

Just look in google for the site.

My name is Laura Rose, otherwise I won't get your letter. It's got the contact information on the site. Happy hunting.
 
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