Why am I having so much of a problem getting a good Christian girlfriend?
- Thread starter dothackzero
- Start date
-
Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.
If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!
To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
S
Wow dude.. im almost in the EXACT same situation as you.. cept in 21.. never had a girlfriend. It does suck, but i just have to keep telling myself, when God wants it to happen.. it will happen, and there is nothing you can do to stop it 
Keep praying on it. My cousin Danny is 35, and only 2 years ago did he get his FIRST girlfriend. They married and now have a child, you wont know when it will happen, but it will. And ya, im pretty sure thats how it works.. the longer you wait, the prettier she'll be
Keep praying on it. My cousin Danny is 35, and only 2 years ago did he get his FIRST girlfriend. They married and now have a child, you wont know when it will happen, but it will. And ya, im pretty sure thats how it works.. the longer you wait, the prettier she'll be
X
I'm actually kind of in the same boat as you. I'm 21 and I have never had a girlfriend. I'm sure I give off the wrong vibe though and have built a wall around myself that makes it hard for people to get to know me. I would like to believe that as long as you have standards that one day you will find somebody who you can truly love and that will love you. I think that the higher price a person pays for something the better the reward. If you do not lose heart and you live in righteousness I'm sure that the wait will be worth it. That's something that I need to live by as well.
You can't find a girlfriend for the same reason I cant bro. I'm 23. The only girl I ever kissed stole from me and lied to me.
Because there are no good Christian girls. All I see is clones of Britney Spears, Bratz, Lindsey Lohan and etc. There are no girls that have a molecule of intelligence. They are all the same.
I hope to God I am wrong. I want to marry and don't want to be single, but I'm never going to pick just anybody again. Once was enough. I will look for as many years as God thinks I should. There must at least be a tiny percentage of normal intelligent and kind hearted women who are not as old as my aunt in this world.
If this keeps up I might just marry someone 20 years older than me because I am mentally a lot older than 23.
Don't worry bro, you are not alone. There is NOTHING wrong with you. I am like you in many ways. Also a geek and etc. There is nothing wrong with you. There is everything wrong with THEM.
Because there are no good Christian girls. All I see is clones of Britney Spears, Bratz, Lindsey Lohan and etc. There are no girls that have a molecule of intelligence. They are all the same.
I hope to God I am wrong. I want to marry and don't want to be single, but I'm never going to pick just anybody again. Once was enough. I will look for as many years as God thinks I should. There must at least be a tiny percentage of normal intelligent and kind hearted women who are not as old as my aunt in this world.
If this keeps up I might just marry someone 20 years older than me because I am mentally a lot older than 23.
Don't worry bro, you are not alone. There is NOTHING wrong with you. I am like you in many ways. Also a geek and etc. There is nothing wrong with you. There is everything wrong with THEM.
Does the fact that I have to wait for so long for a girlfriend mean that I'm gonna get a better girl that I would have gotten if I didn't have to wait? Does it also mean that she'll be hotter too?
B
So okay, I am a girl and feel weird commenting on this but it's always good insight to hear from the source. One thing that girls in general look for in a relationship in a prince someone thats there to love them to chase after them and to be dedicated to them. One thing I say if you want to get to know women better is read the following, Captivating, Proverbs 31, and the beginning of genesis. Captivating will tell you all about a woman and about her heart and what us as women like and look for. Also make sure that you as a man have read a book for men and read through the word about a man as a follower of christ. Wild at heart is a great book for guys, and its also from the same authors as captivating, so it's good to read the two. Woman love to be chased after and not have to be the one chasing you. Thats important to remember, and most of all make sure that your relationship with the lord is in the right place before you begin pursueing a girl as well.
I hope this helps atleast a bit. Have a good evening
I hope this helps atleast a bit. Have a good evening
B
I would love to see proof. Hopefully if I hang around this website more I will.
Hopefully if I hang around this website more I will.
Very well put, Baptist. And it goes both ways... we can't just blame the men, much as some of us women would like to do--some women are all about appearances and money... which isn't right either. It all boils down to growing and stretching as a person with God's guidance... I know--always easier said than done.
B
Very well put, Baptist. And it goes both ways... we can't just blame the men, much as some of us women would like to do--some women are all about appearances and money... which isn't right either. It all boils down to growing and stretching as a person with God's guidance... I know--always easier said than done.
J
You do make some good points, Baptist. Also, how many people are truly prepared for the difficulties of marriage right out of their teen years? There's a lot of growing up that takes place after that. I know that some people make it work, but many more don't make it.
As for why, only God knows why for certain, dothackzero. He has a plan for each of us, and He only lets us in on it one step at a time. I know that there are many things that leave me scratching my head, wondering "What purpose did this serve?", but eventually all of the pieces will fit together like a puzzle. It can be frustrating, especially as you watch people around you date, marry, and have families. But you have to remember that you're not the only one in this situation. And it may be that the reason why you haven't found someone yet is because you're too focused on it. It's more important to seek God first. Even Jesus tells us that in Matthew 6. Seek God first, and He will take care of you. If you're too focused on dating, then God isn't first in your life. And if God isn't first in your life, then you're just not ready.
Try not to get frustrated. I think the statistics are that 96% of people get married at least one time. And, I wouldn't be surprised if the other 4% that statistic includes people living in alternative lifestyles, priests, nuns, monks, and the occasional man-child who is still 40 and lives in his parents' basement because he refuses to grow up and get a job. I'll be 25 in October, and I have also never been kissed. I had a boyfriend for about a month, just recently back in May (my first and only boyfriend, unless you count having a "boyfriend" when I was 10 years old - and he moved away three months later). We prayed about it, and gave it a chance, but there were no romantic feelings there and we just didn't have much in common. So, besides talking and getting to know each other and going on a few dates, I'm in the same boat as many of you.
So, besides a brief spell of dating, my love life has also been non-existant. But I've always felt like getting married and being a mother was going to be a big part of my life, and considering my situation, I prayed and asked God that if it wasn't meant to be, to remove the desire from my heart. God has, I believe, shown me that I am meant to marry, and not to give up on it. But I needed to shift focus because it was too important to me, and I now focus on Him (and I'm not perfect, but rather a work in progress), and it doesn't bother me anymore. Sure, I hope to meet the person God has for me soon, but the time that I am single God is able to use me in other ways, and I'm able to be comfortable with just being myself and having my own interests, and not worrying what anyone else thinks.
In the end, it just works out better to let our Father arrange our marriages. Besides, very few arranged marriages end in divorce.
As for why, only God knows why for certain, dothackzero. He has a plan for each of us, and He only lets us in on it one step at a time. I know that there are many things that leave me scratching my head, wondering "What purpose did this serve?", but eventually all of the pieces will fit together like a puzzle. It can be frustrating, especially as you watch people around you date, marry, and have families. But you have to remember that you're not the only one in this situation. And it may be that the reason why you haven't found someone yet is because you're too focused on it. It's more important to seek God first. Even Jesus tells us that in Matthew 6. Seek God first, and He will take care of you. If you're too focused on dating, then God isn't first in your life. And if God isn't first in your life, then you're just not ready.
Try not to get frustrated. I think the statistics are that 96% of people get married at least one time. And, I wouldn't be surprised if the other 4% that statistic includes people living in alternative lifestyles, priests, nuns, monks, and the occasional man-child who is still 40 and lives in his parents' basement because he refuses to grow up and get a job.
I'll be 25 in October, and I have also never been kissed. I had a boyfriend for about a month, just recently back in May (my first and only boyfriend, unless you count having a "boyfriend" when I was 10 years old - and he moved away three months later). We prayed about it, and gave it a chance, but there were no romantic feelings there and we just didn't have much in common. So, besides talking and getting to know each other and going on a few dates, I'm in the same boat as many of you.So, besides a brief spell of dating, my love life has also been non-existant. But I've always felt like getting married and being a mother was going to be a big part of my life, and considering my situation, I prayed and asked God that if it wasn't meant to be, to remove the desire from my heart. God has, I believe, shown me that I am meant to marry, and not to give up on it. But I needed to shift focus because it was too important to me, and I now focus on Him (and I'm not perfect, but rather a work in progress), and it doesn't bother me anymore. Sure, I hope to meet the person God has for me soon, but the time that I am single God is able to use me in other ways, and I'm able to be comfortable with just being myself and having my own interests, and not worrying what anyone else thinks.
In the end, it just works out better to let our Father arrange our marriages. Besides, very few arranged marriages end in divorce.