DEPRESSION: A Ladybug's True Story of Dark vs. Light

Thank you, KateBelle.. Yes, God is (trying to) turning me into who He wants me to be. And thanks for these pictures, they're all so cute and will definitely go in my faithbook, which is stickied here on page 1 of the forum, if you haven't seen it already.

this honestly brought tears to my eyes , you give me so much hope , now I feel like I can keep pushing , thank you so much for sharing this post, I am very thankful

​OGC, you are very welcome. God is always with us, and is especially close in times of pain and trials.

What an encouraging story, there is always hope in Jesus! A friend came to me at church one day and said,'why are you still stuggling with your past?' I didnt know what he meant but he went on. He said, 'have you heard of old man new man?' I still wasn't sure what he meant. I had read 2 corinthians 5 : 17 before but revelation via the spirit hit me at that moment!

I had become a christian out of my depression, drug addictions, gambling, thoughts of suicide and sexual sin but was struggling with some of the past strongholds. I knew that my mind needed a transformation and that I was a new creation, that the old had gone and the new had come. This all sounded great in theory but I had no idea what that meant to me practically. Paul also says that we are not waring against flesh and blood but principalitiesand powers of darkness. My revelation was that these powers of darkness were seen in my mind.

I was a new creation, brand spanking new and the Holy Spirit now lived in me. Yet I was struggling with my past still and couldn't get free of some stuff. I had to gain revelation of who I really was in Christ Jesus and that my identity was to be found in Him. This was massive because I had been so hard on me, so critical of me, I had a bad image of me, I did not love me and I entertained lies from satan about me for so long that I thought those thoughts were me! The truth was that I needed to hear the Holy Spirit speak to my mind and listen to Him rather than the lies of the devil. I repented a lot, and gave these srtuggles to the feet of Jesus on the cross. His blood washed me clean and I began by revelation and His word to find out who I really am in Him. When those lies came, when the temptation came I would rebuke the devil and focus on God thoughts right away. Some devils left instantly others needed to be wittled down in power over me. Others needed to be delivered from me by anointed believers.

Thoughts are spirit I discovered. This spiritual battle is fought mostly in our minds. Worship, read my bible, pray, find out my identity in Him and what Jesus thinks of me were some keys in walking in the new creation life. Ephesians 6 was also good in combating the devil and his wicked schemes. Hope this helps

Ladybug you now have authority in this area, God will raise you up to be a leader in this area, you will teach others how to be overcomers. Praise the Lord for your testimony

Wow I can barely see due to the flood of tears.. Reading your testimony blessed me in a deep, and profound way. As I was reading your story I felt like I could hear you speak. Depression is a wicked thing, and can be seen as a curse, but in a strange way going through depression (speaking from my own life) made me realize I could n`t depend on myself, or anyone apart from God to endure through it. I am not sure I would have realized this without going through the trials of depression and lowliness. I use to think depression was separate from God, meaning I could n`t experience Him when I was in that dark, and lonely state, but its not true..NOT AT ALL! God is with me like He is and has been with you, with all of us in our depression. God is greater then depression, or any illness for that matter, praise God!
I found it interesting when I learn t that a lot of the main people in the Bible, some of the great leaders of our faith struggled with depression too.
Thank you for sharing these vulnerable and painful parts of your life with us to read. I found great comfort and encouragement in reading all what you wrote. We are with you sister! Your words of wisdom and honesty are a testament that we can overcome these dark, painful things life can bring through Jesus.
God bless you blue ladybug! <3

RacheRoo, I didn't mean to make you cry..lol.. But tears are therapeutic. I'm so glad to hear my story has blessed you. That's why reading the bible and looking for answers to our own problems is so amazing, because the people who lived back then went through the same things we do: depression, incest, adultery, etc... God bless you too.

Here, writing from the other part of the world...I grew up in a family whereby my mother beats me up with a cane until I bleed. After she beats me, she will be very happy and goes around telling people to beat me. The worst I've ever experienced was when I was 9 years old when she beats me till my face bled. I would run and run all over the house when she beats me and she would chase me round the house. The bathroom became my best friend coz she will not be able to find me when I hide behind the door of the bathroom. She'd sent me to another home for tuition in the evening and tell the teacher to remove my pants so others could see the beating marks on my buttock.

If she does not beat me, she will make my hold my hears and squat up and down up to 100, 200, 300, 400 and even 500 times! Then, I would not be able to walk properly as my knee really hurts badly and when she sees that I could not walk properly, she will bring the cane forward to beat me up too. The last time she beats me, I was 21 years old and since I started work then, my boss then knew about it and she would come by to pick me up (I was not driving then) on weekends and public holidays to work so I will be away from my parents' place.

Reading your story, lady blue, reminds me a lot of my past...but I know that now, I've left my parents' place for so many years, just as the counsellor told me, it's better for me.

sigh - Vivienne, you and blueladybug - I want to write something profound but your stories are so sad I feel lame even trying to comment in a way that does justice to it. I just wanna say that you both touch me and I hope I keep running into you both because I find you two very supportive and I enjoy chatting with you.
Hugs
Zoii

Zoii, you are NOT "lame." Your story is just as important as ours. My pm is always open, and I hope you'll take advantage of it. I think you are a remarkable young lady and are all the stronger for everything that you have been through.

Thank you, SP.. I'm glad you enjoyed reading it..

Thank you for sharing your story. I wanted to reach out and hug you and not let go for a long long time.God is doing that for you right now. He cares so very much for you. He loves you extremly..more than we could even imagine. My prayer for you is total
forgiveness of those who hurt you, letting go and letting God have His way in you. You have helped so many people which is on going in your life. God is filling you with His grace and His ever abiding love to reach the hurting and lost ones that need Jesus i skin. You are being used of God in special ways....all glory be to Him. He has and is healing you body,soul, and spirit. I claim a new cleansing, a new beginning, a presence of our almighty God to anoint you into more service for Him. I will put you in my prayer and praise book tonight. We are all in a fight and we know who wins . Yeah!!1JESUS. Love and more strength to you now and forever.

Thank you blue_ladybug. You are a great help in times of trouble. My God is able to deliver us. Praises to His name.
Ladies Bible Study was wonderful..good fellowship, sharing, scripture and prayer time. I am so thankful. My depression is gone and I am the real me. Thank You Jesus. I am happy, content, and being creative all because of the Lords strength. Where I am weak He is strong. Derek (ourSon) isn't up yet and it is 1:30 pm. He must have had a hard night with his Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. I am ready to fix him something good to eat. I am a mom that loves him dearly and am his caregiver. I pray over him every night while I massage his back and rub his feet. God is keeping my hands strong...I am so thankful. Thank you again for being Jesus in skin. You are a delight and shinning forth God's love through your life.

You're welcome, Bonnie. Derek is a real blessing here at CC. He posted many inspiring things to me while I was bedridden with a herniated disk and sciatica. I'm glad to hear his case finally got approved. God bless.

Hi, It is 6:25 am and wide awake. Spending time in prayer and Bible Study...and a quick chat. Yes, Derek is a wonderful son. He still feels squished morning, noon and night ,sitting up or laying down. Every evening I rub his back with a heavy vibrator and do reflexology on his feet. We finally found a Nature Path who is going to help him. His insurance won't pay for it but the natural suppliments will only cost $30.00 a month. The product is called LDN and has helped over 40 deseases. My husband, Derek and I are going on it soon. We have to do blood tests first.I will look it up and make sure of the name of it and let you know. It helps, MS,BiPolar(I will be going off Lithium after using it for over 20 years) ADHA<ADD, pain, on and on. I will write you more about it soon. Have a wonderful Jesus Day. Want to share some reject that just happened in my life. God is helping me through it all. God's blessing touch and heal you completly. My love, Bonnie77

Good Morning again..6:50am. The name of the product is LDN (Naltrexone) usually only givem by Natural Paths.Our lady is Dr.Virginia Frazer(Naturopathic Physician,Liscensed Midwife and is in Kennewick. She takes patients by phone and Skype and covers some insurances...Aetna,Cigna, First Choice, Group Health, United Health Care among others.She is also a CHristian and goes to Calvary Chapel. We met her half way in Granview, Wash. for Dereks first appointment. We are encouraged. You can research the LDN on the Internet. Trust this is an answer we have been searching for. For you too. Love and more blessings. Bonnie77

Its amazing what we can learn when we hear those around us. You're so amazing and an enriching part of CC! I absolutely love the reason behind your avatar!

I have also experienced extremely dark thoughts and major depression. One bought of depression I had came with anxiety and lasted for years. I feel like a different person now... even though I don't want to.

Luckily I'm in a much better place now, but I'll never be who I was before all that. However, only the grace of God got me through that, and now I truly know how strong I am.

God bless

Hi, my name is Kale. I am here to describe what has happened to me and what I've done. I'm battling with myself over depression, abuse (not in the way you may first think of), addiction, and so on. I have hurt people, especially the one person I loved more than anything in this world and I have hurt more and more over it every single day since what has happened. I don't know who to turn to or where to go to ask for forgiveness and move on, hopefully become happy again. I don't know if this subject will apply to this thread but I figured I should give it a shot. I have been needing help for a long time with my depression and I have let it control who I am. It has caused me to treat the people I love and the ones around me worse than dirt, it has caused me to use addictions as a way to have something to keep me happy, not the ones I love keeping me happy, but just being one whatever I was on would keep me happy which I shouldn't have let it escalate to that. I have suffered from a rough childhood and I am still battling with myself and my own mind everyday. It started getting really bad one day and it has been escalating ever since, and I have no one to turn towards to help me look up towards everything with a smile. I have hurt the people closest to me that were just trying to help and I don't know what to do from here. I have lost everything and I feel I'm not done losing what I have left. I don't know what to do in this situation, I am completely lost. Does anyone have any advice on where I could turn to, what I could do, who I could talk to, anything? I have never been the type of person to really open up about myself but now I feel is a long overdue time to make a change and better myself. Please if anyone wants to help, contact me and I'll describe more about these situations. If this is not the right place for this forum/thread, then please let me know and I'll fix everything. I thank you everyone who stops to read and help out and I hope everyone has a wonderful and blessed day.

thank you blue ladybug your story was sad, fascinating and encouraging, God bless you for sharing x