I hate going to church

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Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,903
8,158
113
#21
Well my son and myself went to a different church today. We found the one we went to before lacking in close fellowship. Plus the sermons were mostly personal things about his children and wife. We enjoy more teaching and the word ,but also a personal touch. Plus the church we had attended everyone ran out of it afterwards. It was a very big church.
Anyways happy to say the church we attended today was a much better church. People were friendlier , the sermon was spot on and the pastor gave plenty of scriptures and they aligned with one another. It is a very small southern style church. But for me is preferred. We want more then just a general meeting place for other believers. We feel we can be fed, but also can be used by God here. That is what we are looking for though in a church. I do believe though when we had services at home it was our church and it was what God had wanted us to do atm.
They're my kind of people
My kind of people
This is the church and this is the steeple
Open the door, it's my kind of people

 
Mar 4, 2020
8,614
3,678
113
#22
Hi everyone

I want to want to enjoy going to Church as we are admonished for not going in Hebrews 10

But I hate the effort involved in going to Church and I feel I get so little from a sermon. It's an hour of boring sermons and then an hour of fellowship. I hate singing although I know the songs are good for you spiritually. I enjoy the fellowship but it's mostly Smalltalk you cannot really share what you truly think as you'll be rejected for your doctrine or rejected for something. Or you won't be understood or listened to.

When I talk I say what I mean and mean what I say. I watch what I say as a result.

If I were to go it would be due to obligation not due to loving going or genuine desire to worship. I want to love God. But I find sermons a really ineffective information transfer compared to writings of the bible. The bible is densely written.

Can I get all my Christian fellowship from the internet? I feel good for going to church for 10 minutes after but I find is severely lacking for me. I don't understand how people can go to church every Sunday for 50 years on top of 1-3 grind of jobs and chores. And Saturday for Sabbath which I keep. I am called to take up my cross but I still feel I don't want to go to church.

Corinthians 13 says we shouldn't insist on our own way. But I really don't want to go to church I feel I get nothing out of the system. I would rather read the Bible myself or study intellectually challenging problems. Or create something.

I don't always agree with other people's understanding of scripture.
I humbly offer you my commentary on Hebrews 10:24,25 that will hopefully help you understand the singular purpose of assembling with other believers.

Hebrews 10:24,25 LEB
24 And let us think about how to stir one another up to love and good works,
25 not abandoning our meeting together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging each other, and by so much more as you see the day drawing near.

Christians are supposed to go to church to stir one another up to love and good works. Obviously, that has changed over time.

You don’t have to listen to the sermon or sing with everyone else if that isn’t your style since there isn’t a command to meet together to sing and listen to sermons I’m aware of; correct me if I’m wrong.

You can find other creative ways to stir other people up to love and good works.

Christians are united spiritually, not geographically, and there is no centralized leadership aside from Lord Yahweh, His Son Jesus of Nazareth, and His Holy Spirit. So virtual church online is a valid option.

If you want just let me know and we can pray together on church day and listen to God speak. I live in Southeast Asia so there’s a 13 hour time difference with EST while daylight savings time is in effect.
 

hornetguy

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2016
6,639
1,393
113
#23
I find Church to be void of joy and happiness and very solemn and depressing.

Everything is so serious. I understand the nature of God is serious but God is good.

When I go to Church it is due to God due to Hebrews 10. And I want to talk to people with wisdom or intelligence. I also want to do things that I find worthy. Such as giving good deserving poor people money.

God is good and the news of God is good news. Why aren't people extremely excited and happy?

Why do we go to Church one or two days a week and not have our faith shared and exhibited in our working day

We spend 5 days a week at work, why isn't this time Jesus focused. We work 1-3 jobs and fit Jesus into church one day a week what are we doing the rest of the week? Why isn't God the highlight of all our thinking and decisions in work environments ?

I find Church WORK. I do enough of that during the week. When it should be more joy and satisfaction and happiness. Writing sermons, writing songs, writing music, creating powerpoints is all work.

If nobody remembers an uninspired sermon afterwards was it a waste of time?

I am actually upset that organised religion has evolved into what it did and is so void of any soul and joy. I question the value of most of the sermons I went to. I question the value of the operation of the Church as it exists today.
So, perhaps you should start your own home church. Find several others who feel the way you do, and begin your own assembly. You could do things however you think is worthwhile, then.
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
14,365
5,235
113
62
#24
I find Church to be void of joy and happiness and very solemn and depressing.

Everything is so serious. I understand the nature of God is serious but God is good.

When I go to Church it is due to God due to Hebrews 10. And I want to talk to people with wisdom or intelligence. I also want to do things that I find worthy. Such as giving good deserving poor people money.

God is good and the news of God is good news. Why aren't people extremely excited and happy?

Why do we go to Church one or two days a week and not have our faith shared and exhibited in our working day

We spend 5 days a week at work, why isn't this time Jesus focused. We work 1-3 jobs and fit Jesus into church one day a week what are we doing the rest of the week? Why isn't God the highlight of all our thinking and decisions in work environments ?

I find Church WORK. I do enough of that during the week. When it should be more joy and satisfaction and happiness. Writing sermons, writing songs, writing music, creating powerpoints is all work.

If nobody remembers an uninspired sermon afterwards was it a waste of time?

I am actually upset that organised religion has evolved into what it did and is so void of any soul and joy. I question the value of most of the sermons I went to. I question the value of the operation of the Church as it exists today.
I understand your frustration. But joy doesn't come from church. It comes from being in the presence of God...
I find Church to be void of joy and happiness and very solemn and depressing.

Everything is so serious. I understand the nature of God is serious but God is good.

When I go to Church it is due to God due to Hebrews 10. And I want to talk to people with wisdom or intelligence. I also want to do things that I find worthy. Such as giving good deserving poor people money.

God is good and the news of God is good news. Why aren't people extremely excited and happy?

Why do we go to Church one or two days a week and not have our faith shared and exhibited in our working day

We spend 5 days a week at work, why isn't this time Jesus focused. We work 1-3 jobs and fit Jesus into church one day a week what are we doing the rest of the week? Why isn't God the highlight of all our thinking and decisions in work environments ?

I find Church WORK. I do enough of that during the week. When it should be more joy and satisfaction and happiness. Writing sermons, writing songs, writing music, creating powerpoints is all work.

If nobody remembers an uninspired sermon afterwards was it a waste of time?

I am actually upset that organised religion has evolved into what it did and is so void of any soul and joy. I question the value of most of the sermons I went to. I question the value of the operation of the Church as it exists today.
I truly understand your frustration but joy doesn't come from church or any other activity...it comes from being in the presence of God...Psalm 16:11. One of the points I was trying to make is that in all we do, including worship, we are to abide in Christ. Just something to consider...are you finding life in the things you do or in God Himself?
The last thing I desire is to seem critical. But you seem established in your faith and would welcome Iron on iron interaction.
Am praying for you. Grace and peace.
 

Willow

Well-known member
Oct 10, 2021
435
403
63
ohio
#25
maybe you just havent found a good church congregation though I know the feeling

an hour of sermons is too long and then what really happens in fellowship?
when its centred around the Lord supper it can be good, or the way sunday school can be taught where its more hands on an active than passive.

I have tried just straight quiet worship Quaker style but the meeting house is so far away it sort of negates the time taken to even get there

I do want to start a quiet reading at the local library but so far, its never really been the right time

sometimes the whole sit down stand up sing song sit and listen routine then small talk is just not engaging enough for me. I dont need to be entertained, but when I suggested everyone get pedicures - foot washing WAS something the early church pacticed everyone is like Im some kind of freak for suggesting it.
That's what alot of churches are like mainly seems to be like. That is an obligation of what the scriptures tell us. But many go out and act worse then those that do not proclaim to be a born again Christian. Years back I was told the loudest hypocrits sit in the front row and yell amen etc. and never hear a word preached. I have to say I have found that quite true from experience.
But I go because it is what God has laid on my heart. I try and keep my eyes on him at church. I am not one for small talk . I actually have PTSD from being attacked from church members and being badgered and mistreated. So for me going to church is a big step in faith and discerning who to be around and who to avoid like the plague.
I went to one before this that badgered and bashed the members all through his sermon. I was horrified and grieved in my spirit for those that went there. I tried to sneak out without any confrontation of having to speak to the pastor etc. Alas was confronted to shake his fathers hand.Both he and his father over the age of 60. He shook my hand and asked what I thought. I go alot of what he said was the truth , but unsure it was said in love. His mouth dropped open. The ones around him the same. I said God bless and left.
Years ago would of kept going thinking this was God's will to be punished thru the whole sermon. Now he has given me discernment and I will not sit under tyranny.
Hope you find what you need in God and there are still churches out there that do feet washing. I have been to a few.
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
5,606
2,202
113
#26
Sermons are boring and it's been years since I enjoyed one.

However....

I really enjoy small groups. That's where the relationships are made and kept.

Those friends who are musically inclined play in the orchestra or sing in the choir.
I know their children in the children's programs.

These people sustain me and brighten my view of the world. I am rather studied in scriptures and hermeneutics...I can teach if necessary but I am not good at it....I'm much better at learning. And they can't teach from the pulpit at a level that I would find interesting. So I gave that up over a decade ago.

Besides...nobody ever really changed their life because of a sermon. We change our lives based on the relationships we have.
So for that reason I like church. And when I can't go I still keep relationships with other select Christian friends.
 

Willow

Well-known member
Oct 10, 2021
435
403
63
ohio
#27
Sermons are boring and it's been years since I enjoyed one.

However....

I really enjoy small groups. That's where the relationships are made and kept.

Those friends who are musically inclined play in the orchestra or sing in the choir.
I know their children in the children's programs.

These people sustain me and brighten my view of the world. I am rather studied in scriptures and hermeneutics...I can teach if necessary but I am not good at it....I'm much better at learning. And they can't teach from the pulpit at a level that I would find interesting. So I gave that up over a decade ago.

Besides...nobody ever really changed their life because of a sermon. We change our lives based on the relationships we have.
So for that reason I like church. And when I can't go I still keep relationships with other select Christian friends.
Actually many have given their lives to God because of Holy Spirit led sermons. I enjoy spirit led sermons. Does not mean a shouting or holy rolling sermon. But Christ led. There was no relationship with Christ before I was saved and born again. It was because of the pastor following the Holy Spirit and being led. Now being born again I am led by him and have a close relationship with God. Sorry you feel sermons are boring. Perhaps have not had the right leader. Glad you enjoy the small groups. Perhaps why I enjoy smaller churches,amen!
 

arthurfleminger

Well-known member
Aug 18, 2021
1,405
770
113
#28
A number of people on this thread seem to dislike or even hate going to church. A number on this thread even recommend that you should quit going to church.

That's interesting. But keep in mind that Jesus founded His Church and promised to be with it until the end of time. Jesus also promised to send the Holy Spirit to the Church to lead it to all truth. And, not to forget, Jesus promised that whenever two or more were gathered in His Name, He'd be present with them.

So, it's interesting that Jesus placed importance on the Church and promised to be with those who gathered in the church, yet many on this thread see the church as being of no importance.

Obviously, some on this thread think Jesus made a mistake in establishing His church, or they don't believe that He'll be present with them when they gather in His Name, or maybe they'd just rather sleep in or watch the latest sports contest?

Go figure????????????????????????
 

arthurfleminger

Well-known member
Aug 18, 2021
1,405
770
113
#29
A number of people on this thread seem to dislike or even hate going to church. A number on this thread even recommend that you should quit going to church.

That's interesting. But keep in mind that Jesus founded His Church and promised to be with it until the end of time. Jesus also promised to send the Holy Spirit to the Church to lead it to all truth. And, not to forget, Jesus promised that whenever two or more were gathered in His Name, He'd be present with them.

So, it's interesting that Jesus placed importance on the Church and promised to be with those who gathered in the church, yet many on this thread see the church as being of no importance.

Obviously, some on this thread think Jesus made a mistake in establishing His church, or they don't believe that He'll be present with them when they gather in His Name, or maybe they'd just rather sleep in or watch the latest sports contest?

Go figure????????????????????????

And, BTW, if you hate going to church, you're not alone. Nearly seven-in-ten U.S. Christians (68%) say they pray daily, while 47% say they attend church at least weekly. what % of Christians attend church weekly - Search (bing.com)

It's funny, actually sort of sad, that all Christians would say they want to live with God forever in heaven. But so many of the same have so little or no time for God here on earth.
 

arthurfleminger

Well-known member
Aug 18, 2021
1,405
770
113
#30
I will say this, from my own personal experience with a large extended family, if a family has children and the parents don't go to church on a regular basis, their children never will either. In fact, in all cases in my family, the children of parents who didn't attend church became 'Nones' when they grew up. Not only did these children attend church, they became secular/agnostic/atheist with Christ paying no part in their lives.

So, if you have children and you are considering not going to church, remember that it will have future ramifications for your children. And the grown up children will give the 'tired old excuse', we weren't raised in a Christian household.
 
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
#31
I find Church to be void of joy and happiness and very solemn and depressing.
The question is, why do YOU find church to be solemn and depressing? Because of the message, people, or what?

God is good and the news of God is good news. Why aren't people extremely excited and happy?
For me, part of the sad/gloomy part of going to church, aside from the reasons I stated above such as the melancholic Irish-sounding hymns, is the reminder that a lot of humanity may go to hell. It is like a weekly reminder. So I wonder how many Christians can be happy; it's like these Christians live in their own bubble, care only that their own family is saved, etc. I understand people being joyful about being saved, but it also seems that the possibility of most of humanity going to hell has no impact on them whatsoever.
 
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
#32
I used to go to an Asian restaurant with someone who believed very strongly that most of humanity is lost and would go to hell. There was a status of Buddha at the front, and it was quite obvious that the workers there were obviously nonbelievers. However, she always enjoyed her meals and happily ate there. It always puzzled me how she can enjoy her meal so well knowing that the entire wait staff would possibly go to hell.
 
J

joecoten

Guest
#33
Worship music is about and for the Lord. It's about Him, not us. I understand that. Having said that...
Most worship music I hear today is like a jellyfish. It needs a spine. We're supposed to be an army, but it seems like we've taken too many Xanax! This, of course, is just my point of view.
Raise up your army, Lord, teach us to fight
Raise up a people who will carry forth your light
Into the darkness of this dying world
That You so love that You gave Your son to die
So that they might not perish, but receive eternal life
So raise up Your army, Lord, teach us to fight! -tc
 
Mar 9, 2022
33
17
8
#34
The question is, why do YOU find church to be solemn and depressing? Because of the message, people, or what?
I think the atmosphere and the people. The gathering around to listen to a teacher. We defer a lot of individuality to listen to the pastor who dedicates their life into understanding the word. It's just so depressing. It's not happy or exciting.

The assumption that they know how to explain complicated matters to lay people. The result is boring uninspired preaching.

Not saying I could do better. I just feel the Church needs a bit of oomph of energy put into it. Something exciting that is GOOD.

If I'm going to spend an hour at a timeshare, it better be entertaining!
 
Jun 12, 2021
416
91
28
#35
Hi everyone

I want to want to enjoy going to Church as we are admonished for not going in Hebrews 10

But I hate the effort involved in going to Church and I feel I get so little from a sermon. It's an hour of boring sermons and then an hour of fellowship. I hate singing although I know the songs are good for you spiritually. I enjoy the fellowship but it's mostly Smalltalk you cannot really share what you truly think as you'll be rejected for your doctrine or rejected for something. Or you won't be understood or listened to.

When I talk I say what I mean and mean what I say. I watch what I say as a result.

If I were to go it would be due to obligation not due to loving going or genuine desire to worship. I want to love God. But I find sermons a really ineffective information transfer compared to writings of the bible. The bible is densely written.

Can I get all my Christian fellowship from the internet? I feel good for going to church for 10 minutes after but I find is severely lacking for me. I don't understand how people can go to church every Sunday for 50 years on top of 1-3 grind of jobs and chores. And Saturday for Sabbath which I keep. I am called to take up my cross but I still feel I don't want to go to church.

Corinthians 13 says we shouldn't insist on our own way. But I really don't want to go to church I feel I get nothing out of the system. I would rather read the Bible myself or study intellectually challenging problems. Or create something.

I don't always agree with other people's understanding of scripture.
Count the cost. Check for yourself, if you are one of God's elect or one of the nonelect.

https://spreadthegospel59.wordpress...s-powerful-how-do-we-receive-the-holy-spirit/

If you love God, you will obey God.

Luke 14:25-33
1 John 2:15-17
New King James Version


Do Not Love the World
15 Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 16 For all that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world. 17 And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever.

James 4:4
New King James Version


4 [a]Adulterers and adulteresses! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.

2 Corinthians 6:14-17
New King James Version


14 Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what [a]fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what [b]communion has light with darkness? 15 And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever? 16 And what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For you[c] are the temple of the living God. As God has said:
“I will dwell in them
And walk among them.
I will be their God,
And they shall be My people.”
17 Therefore
“Come out from among them
And be separate, says the Lord.
Do not touch what is unclean,
And I will receive you.”


Belial is Lucifer=Satan.
 
Mar 4, 2020
8,614
3,678
113
#36
I don’t think it’s quite like that. After having read through the comments, I didn’t notice any hostility directed toward the church. One person said don’t go to church, but rather take time to understand the Bible first, then see about going to church. I agree.

The greatest inoculation against false doctrines and cults is the truth. On one hand there are benefits to learning the written word in solitude, appealing directly to God for help, while shutting out the distractions of alleged Bible know-it-alls. On the other hand it is helpful to study in groups, but not all groups are beneficial to study with.

It’s possible to end up more lost and confused than someone started out as if they got hooked in early on by a Jehova’s Witness for example. So part of the danger of going to church are incompetent leaders for disciples to learn and grow under and a lack of purpose. Going to church to hear sermons and sing songs and give money just isn’t a valid scriptural purpose for church, but that’s what churches are doing. I honestly don’t believe that is Jesus’s church.

Hebrews 10:24,25 says getting together is to stir each other up to love and good works.

Imagine how fun and effective church would actually be if when we came together we devoted all of our energy to practicing love and doing good works? We would take the world by storm and our love and good works would create more converts than singing and preaching. Just like Jesus said. Imagine that.
 
J

joecoten

Guest
#37
The Lord took me out of the church for a season. Perhaps He has just brought me back into it.
For a time, my fellowship was online, including this site.
Sunday morning in a building can be good, but it's not the be-all-and-end-all of church.
BTW...I'd say to do all of the above...and more! Worshipping with song is good when it's genuine. He inhabits our praises.
A good thing is to visit those who have trouble getting out.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,903
8,158
113
#38
I think the atmosphere and the people. The gathering around to listen to a teacher. We defer a lot of individuality to listen to the pastor who dedicates their life into understanding the word. It's just so depressing. It's not happy or exciting.

The assumption that they know how to explain complicated matters to lay people. The result is boring uninspired preaching.

Not saying I could do better. I just feel the Church needs a bit of oomph of energy put into it. Something exciting that is GOOD.

If I'm going to spend an hour at a timeshare, it better be entertaining!
Oh shoot, there's LOTS of churches out there that major in entertainment, if that's your thing. Look for what they call megachurches. A lot of them have entertainment down to a science.
 

Eli1

Well-known member
Apr 5, 2022
3,254
1,105
113
46
#39
“The Church” is a controversial topic.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
24,685
13,373
113
#40
Hi everyone

I want to want to enjoy going to Church as we are admonished for not going in Hebrews 10

But I hate the effort involved in going to Church and I feel I get so little from a sermon. It's an hour of boring sermons and then an hour of fellowship. I hate singing although I know the songs are good for you spiritually. I enjoy the fellowship but it's mostly Smalltalk you cannot really share what you truly think as you'll be rejected for your doctrine or rejected for something. Or you won't be understood or listened to.

When I talk I say what I mean and mean what I say. I watch what I say as a result.

If I were to go it would be due to obligation not due to loving going or genuine desire to worship. I want to love God. But I find sermons a really ineffective information transfer compared to writings of the bible. The bible is densely written.

Can I get all my Christian fellowship from the internet? I feel good for going to church for 10 minutes after but I find is severely lacking for me. I don't understand how people can go to church every Sunday for 50 years on top of 1-3 grind of jobs and chores. And Saturday for Sabbath which I keep. I am called to take up my cross but I still feel I don't want to go to church.

Corinthians 13 says we shouldn't insist on our own way. But I really don't want to go to church I feel I get nothing out of the system. I would rather read the Bible myself or study intellectually challenging problems. Or create something.

I don't always agree with other people's understanding of scripture.
Perhaps the problem is that you're focusing on your own interests too much.

Instead of going to church to get something, try going to church to give something: fellowship to a lonely person, affirmation for a hardworking pastor, comfort for a troubled soul. Since you get fed by reading Scripture, stop looking to the preacher to feed you, and let your understanding of Scripture flow out in love and edification to others.