Love is more than a feeling, and even more than a choice.....

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Deuteronomy

Well-known member
Jun 11, 2018
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#1
When looking for the source of a different Sinclair Ferguson quote today, I ran across this one and thought I should post it. My wife and I attended a couple of marriage conferences years ago, and I remember them telling us that "love is not only a feeling, it's a choice that we make", but I think this idea is better still. What say you?


~Deut

Luke 10
27 “You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind,
and your neighbor as yourself.”
 
Jul 20, 2019
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#2
After growing up with narcissistic parents I can share that love can certainly be cancelled and fast. I have not and will not talk to that family ever again. However, I also fell in love with someone who ended up treating me very badly. I can honestly say despite what she did, I cannot and will not ever have another partner again, the connection from the soul/heart is simply to strong. I believe its called unconditional love, a rare thing with married people these days. Yes, you can live with someone but as I have experienced, I liken it to a brother/sister relationship, yes we care and love each other, but its nowhere near the level of the young lady I genuinely love, a big difference.
 

Deuteronomy

Well-known member
Jun 11, 2018
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#3
Hello @Gregoryp, as one of the Lord's very own, you are secure in His amazing and steadfast love, but I'm very sorry to hear that you've had such bad experiences with parental and marital love :(

~Deut
 
Jul 6, 2020
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#4
I like this one.

Love is of God
and everyone who loves knows God
For God is Love.
 
Jul 6, 2020
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#5
I missed a part
Everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.
He that does not love does not know God.

Which begs the question
Does that lower the bar for knowing God
or does it raise the bar for actually loving?
 
Jul 20, 2019
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#6
Hello @Gregoryp, as one of the Lord's very own, you are secure in His amazing and steadfast love, but I'm very sorry to hear that you've had such bad experiences with parental and marital love :(
oh, I have never been married, no kids, three long term relationships with much older women. To cut a long story short, 8 years ago I prayed for the lord for my soulmate. The young lady and one other connected with me energetically. The other one turned out to be a narcissist, and the young one is as well. Why this happened I cannot perceive why. All I know is I cannot let go of the younger one.
~Deut
 
Feb 28, 2016
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#7
Deut,
for hub and myself, 'love' will always be our first emotion=commitment -
JOHN 15:13.
Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.
 
Feb 28, 2016
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=======================================================
this relationship needs to be sorted-out Greg, in order for
you to continue to grow and move forward in your
walk with Jesus Christ...
hugs...
 
Jul 20, 2019
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#9
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this relationship needs to be sorted-out Greg, in order for
you to continue to grow and move forward in your
walk with Jesus Christ...
hugs...
:O which relationship?
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
17,142
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#12


Love's not a feeling
Oh we've got to learn
To get past our emotions
To the meaning of the word
Love's not a feeling
We can lose or throw away
Lord give us the courage
To live it every day
 

Deuteronomy

Well-known member
Jun 11, 2018
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#13
Everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. He that does not love does not know God. Which begs the question. Does that lower the bar for knowing God or does it raise the bar for actually loving?
Hello Lion222, that's an interesting question. In this case, I believe that the Greek can help us since there are several Greek words with different meanings (3 in particular) that are all translated into English as "love".

However, in the case of the passage that you posited for us above, every instance of "love, loves, beloved" (be it an adjective, a verb, or a noun) speaks of the highest form of love, the kind love (as v7 points out) that comes from God, ἀγαπητός (adjective), ἀγαπάω (verb) & ἀγάπη (noun) .. transliterated as agapetos, agapao & agape respectively.

1 John 4
7 Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.
8 The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love.

~Deut
 

Deuteronomy

Well-known member
Jun 11, 2018
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#16
There is an interesting series from Dr. R C Sproul that I started watching called, Loved By God. You can watch it for free on Amazon Prime (just search "Sproul"), or you can watch it for free right now on the Ligonier Ministries website .. here.

~Deut
 

AndyMaleh

Well-known member
Jun 26, 2020
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#17
Anyone who chooses to love would commit to their love instead of it being merely a passing unchosen emotion that is not true love to begin with. That said, commitment means doing one's best, but no more. No one must use commitment as a guilt beating rod. It is a quality of love after all.

Godspeed.
 

stepbystep

Well-known member
Aug 31, 2020
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#18
Love is more than a feeling, because God is love. If we learn to love like God, our love will be given freely, deserved or not, returned or not, without reservation or expectations of repayment. The closer we get to God, the closer we get to loving God like I believe, and that is where we will find true love.
 
Jul 20, 2019
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#19
Been there, done that, bought the T-Shirt.
I perceive the lord himself wont let me go, but I could be wrong. She went back to her previous BF and bought a house with him. I would be delighted to break the tie, but if I try all I get is a headache! Sounds satanic to me, but I have prayed on this for ages now, and yet she still is in my ambit.
 
Sep 2, 2020
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#20
The love that is spoken here is of the spirit and has nothing to do with anything physical. God is not about physical love of any sort. He has, in the Bible know to be angry, jealous and demands that He is the only God to be worshipped. Jesus came to earth to be not only our Salvation, but also our intermediary. He took with Him the knowledge of what it is to be human on earth in our physical form. So, when judgement day comes, there will be some understanding of what it is to be human. Love is a choice and a commitment.

There are many different types of love. The love God has for his people is quite different than that of a parent for a child, although HIs is likened to it in the Bible, and vise versa. God does not love us as a husband loves his wife, which, in that type of relationship, there are several forms of love involved, and of course vise versa. He does not love us as a child loves a sibling or a pet. To love God is to obey his laws, the ten commandments, a best we can. Always remembering that repentance is the turning from sin and not doing (what ever) it any more. Galatians, chapter 5, lists the people who will not enter the Kingdom of Heaven who practice sin and what those sins are.

Love is more than fleeting emotion, or the sin of the flesh, referred to as lust. It is commitment. It is a decision, not an instant anything. It is time, like reading and knowing God's word. It is being in the spirit and learning of the Spirit, the Holy Spirit.
And, our world now, is just as sinful as the days of the Galatians. People are lovers of money, druggies, whoremongers, drunkards, louts, revelers, and pseudo christians. They are saved, they say, but in all the years of their fruitless saving, their lives have not changed. They still sin as they did before, only now, they are forgiven, which is a falsehood. They are nothing more than practicers of sin. They don't God anymore than they would follow His word or His laws. Or, the laws of human, which, by God's law is to be followed by Christians as long as it does not directly conflict with God's laws. And, of course, lawlessness is everywhere. And, true repentance is not to be found.

Needless to say, they do not love God, nor do they belong to Him. They are the wolves among the Christians. Just as some Christians practice the sin of fornication, sex outside of marriage, other, more twisted persons think love they neighbor mean have sex, fornicate, with your neighbor. Which, of course, have nothing to do with God or His way of doing things. Love God, the Father Almighty by obeying His and human legal laws, as long as they don't conflict. If human laws conflict with God's law, God's law is to be followed. Two subjects come to mind easily. one homosexuality and abortion. Both are legal, but conflict with God's law. Individual cases for humans are so complex that is am glad that Jesus will be at the right hand of the Father when judgment day comes, to speak into the ear of God on mankind's behalf. This is why only God is to judge, not us, because we do not know every single little thing that goes into whatever the case may be. Only God can know anyones heart fully. Not even the best manipulator can know either. And there are plenty fo those wolves about the sheep.

Take heart my brothers and sisters in Christ, for truly, God cares for and defends His own, with love and unending wisdom.