randomnesssssssss

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Belgian_Pilot

Guest
Brenna, here's one for your dad. He'll laugh with it:

P = The problem logged by the pilot.
S = The solution logged by the mechanic.
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: No. 2 propeller seeping prop fluid.
S: No. 2 propeller seepage normal. Nos. 1, 3 and 4 propellers lack normal seepage.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on backorder.

P: Autopilot in "altitude-hold" mode produces a 200-fpm descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for!

P: Transponder inoperative.
S: Transponder always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: The T/C ball seemed stuck in the middle during my last turn.
S: Congratulations! You've just made your first coordinated turn.

P: Suspected crack in windscreen.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
 
Dec 12, 2009
3,367
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Brenna, here's one for your dad. He'll laugh with it:

P = The problem logged by the pilot.
S = The solution logged by the mechanic.
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: No. 2 propeller seeping prop fluid.
S: No. 2 propeller seepage normal. Nos. 1, 3 and 4 propellers lack normal seepage.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on backorder.

P: Autopilot in "altitude-hold" mode produces a 200-fpm descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for!

P: Transponder inoperative.
S: Transponder always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: The T/C ball seemed stuck in the middle during my last turn.
S: Congratulations! You've just made your first coordinated turn.

P: Suspected crack in windscreen.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
had to hold my breath not to laugh! ill show him later.
 
G

GurlieGurl16

Guest
huh???????????????/o.0
 
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wwjd_kilden

Guest
seen them before :D laughed so hard it hurt

espciall something tightened in the cockpit. LOL , I SO totally could have written that myself
 
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Belgian_Pilot

Guest
Knowing you, I believe you would have... :p
 
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wwjd_kilden

Guest
hehe :D

I read a comic once. someone walks by a person (in a office), and a person sitting at the desk says to the one passing by:

Could you bring me the...*thinks*... item over at that table over there?
- you mean the item on top of the stuff beside the thingy?
 
B

Belgian_Pilot

Guest
hehe :D

I read a comic once. someone walks by a person (in a office), and a person sitting at the desk says to the one passing by:

Could you bring me the...*thinks*... item over at that table over there?
- you mean the item on top of the stuff beside the thingy?
Lol!!! :D:D
 
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christiancollegegirl

Guest
Jajajaj!!!! Dude, those were hilarious!!
 
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greatkraw

Guest
like the programmer taking a trip in a new jetliner
the aeronautical engineer tells the programmer
do you know this jet is flying on VERSION 1.0 OF THE SOFTWARE???
programmer desparately wanted to get off:D
 
B

Belgian_Pilot

Guest
Lol!!!

Speaking of programmers and pilots, this one is also good (yeah I know, it's an old one, but I love it):

There was a pilot flying a small single engine charter plane, with a couple of very important executives on board. He was coming into the Seattle airport through thick fog with less than 10 miles visibility when his instruments went out.

He began circling around looking for a landmark. Finally, a small opening in the fog appears and he sees a tall building with a guy working alone on the fifth floor. He banks the plane around, rolls down the window and shouts to the guy, "Hey where am I?"

The man replies, "You're in an airplane." The pilot rolls up the window, executes a 275 degree turn and proceeds to perform a perfect blind landing on the airport runway 5 miles away.
Just as the plane stops, so does the engine as the fuel has run out. The passengers are amazed and one asks how he did it.

"Quite easy," replies the pilot, "I asked the guy in that building a simple question. The answer he gave me was 100 percent correct but absolutely useless, therefore, that must be Microsoft's support office and from there the airport is just five miles due East."
 
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wwjd_kilden

Guest
loooooooooooooooooool

that is so true...
 
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Belgian_Pilot

Guest
Snooker is a weird game. If you want something to happen, it doesn't. If you don't want something to happen, it does. Did Murphey invent snooker?
 
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wwjd_kilden

Guest
I never remember if snooker = biljard or if pool= biljard
 
B

Belgian_Pilot

Guest
Snooker is not pool is not biliards.

Snooker = big table with holes, with many reds, one of each color, names like Ronny O'sullivan, Ken Doherty, ...
Pool = Smaller table with holes, Striped balls and full colord balls. Balls have numbers.
Biliards = Table witn no holes, only 3 balls.
 
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wwjd_kilden

Guest
ok
in Norwegian Biljard = pool
 
Dec 12, 2009
3,367
4
0
america

hustle=billiard=pool

works other way around too:p

my english teacher is upset that I am well exceeding the goals and expectations of her class. might have to move up, and her upper level class is full, so id hafta switch teachers...

tommy says "accept it ms., she is going to harvard while we stay here"

i don't always like being ahead.

i wish i could slack off like the others
 
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wwjd_kilden

Guest
don't slack, you'll have advantage of being ahead when things get more difficult
 
B

Belgian_Pilot

Guest
I have to say Brenna, for a 13 year old young lady, you do sound very mature indeed! Take that as a compliment!
 
C

christiancollegegirl

Guest
Never be asamed or embarassed of being smart.