I will be honest..up until recently my experiences with COC have been nothing but negative.
I almost dated a gal from COC years ago,she did not see me as equally yoked with her because i was not COC, and invited me to go to her church,i went but then refused to go to mine(have had that happen twice to me, i do not play those games anymore with people)
And the baptismal regeneration concept is based on simply one scripture,however..Baptism is important..to me its a necessary fruit of repentance,it shows you are obedient. If you are not obedient,then why will you not be obedient? However..a bit of water in and of itself could never be equivalent to what Christ did. As far as not knowing what they believe in the first place, are you not allowed to attend other churches or read up on other churches? My experience with many,not all COC people is they isolate themselves to just COC folks, claim to not have a systematic theology(athough i claim they do),say they do not follow any creeds(what about the believe that dunking oneself in water saves? It may not be a creed,but it should be in a doctrinal statement)
The issue with COC i have is they wish to be the non denominational 'denomination' that has the systematic theology of a 'non existent systematic theology'..if this is done on purpose or for the sake of 'not causing division' it still however does cause division. Not using instruments is a 'grey' area that is not even worth worrying about, its not salvic..use instruments already. And as far not causing division,i have met some COC folk in a 'house church' and one of the first things they wanted to know what was my beliefs,and if i got wet. I honestly think that the church of christ is a little disingenuous(most of them) are for not saying they are the first church of the baptismal pool or church of the water.
As far as not knowing, go read about other churches. Do not let your leaders in your church cause you to fear others. I am hoping you do that now,it seems you have. I have met one COC young lady who was petrified of even going inside of another church that was not COC, its a control issue. And a friend of mine who is reform considers COC non christian(i disagree mostly with him,however i can see where he got that conclusion) I ask you is there not a huge issue with some members of COC thinking only COC are saved?(not saying you are,just asking) How is that different from the mormons,the jehovahs witnesses,the 7th day adventists? etc?
Not trying to bash, just get you to think. I have a friend who is COC who i love a lot,however i believe she has just never been exposed to other theological persuations and i have introduced her to Arminian Theology(COC are arminians btw) and to John Wesley,etc.