Triggers

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

S94NY

New member
May 6, 2019
7
4
3
#1
Hi,

I am a mom. And like most moms (and some dads), I am over whelmed ALL the time. I have devoted my life to raising my kids, only I am not raising them, I am going through life like a zombie. Everyday is the same routine, we go to bed and its all the same again. I have always harbored anger in my heart and at times they see this. They hear it. I need it to stop.

About a year ago I found and purchased this book Triggers(Exchanging Parents' Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses) by Amber Lia & Wendy Speake. One year later I finally cracked it open.

And so the journey begins. I decided to share it here. Hope Ya'll don't mind. Feel free to join me.

Section One: External Triggers - When it has everything to do with them ...

Disobedience
Scriptures:
1 John 5:3
Psalm 16:6
Proverbs 16:7

Obedient acts are blessings disguised as boundaries.

When are kids disobey us, we have an immediate opportunity to model obedience ourselves by being slow to anger, long-suffering, and gracious.

"His commandments are not burdensome"

Q&A
How can you practically deal with this trigger in your own life?

Well I failed at this, this morning. I have been sick for weeks on and off, but that doesn't mean I get time off (mentally). All of yesterday I was in bed coughing up a lung and with migraines. All the while going through the checklist of errands and projects I had planned that were now being pushed back. Also wondering what was not happening outside my bedroom, like the kitchen being torn about by my boys and husband. Sure enough, I woke up at 6 this morning only to find a sink full of dishes. And I WENT OFF!!!!! At 6 am. I didnt care who was asleep. I was still coughing up a lung. And I did not have this book in mind or God for that matter, only to ask him why is my family so hateful. Because thats what it feels like when youre so sick to move and yet no one is worried about you enough or at all to help you in the slightest way.

What are some reasons your child(ren) disobeys you? How can you reach the root and speak to their heart so you can guide them to understanding?
I very quickly realize that before I can even answer these questions, I need to get to the root of my own issues. It would be hypocritical of me to speak to their hearts when mine is full of anger and resentment. I have a long ways to go but I'm going to keep moving on. The mere jotting of words are already helping a bit.

Id like to hear yours ...
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
67,716
5,595
113
#2
Welcome to CC. :) This is the Introductions forum. Your OP is better suited for the Family forum.. I can ask a mod to move it there for you if you'd like.. :)
 

Godsgirl83

Well-known member
Apr 1, 2019
1,347
1,320
113
#3
HI S94NY! First off Welcome to CC!
OHHHHHHH I feel like I'm reading something from myself! Thanks for sharing the book info, I'm going to look it up too.
As a mama of 3 I completely understand you.
Oh there's so much to discuss here! There is a forum on the site "Christian Family Forum" Perhaps this would be a topic to move there for more deeper discussions. (I would love to comment more as time permits, hope we can chat sometime soon!)
Blessings!
 
Oct 12, 2012
1,476
865
113
63
#4
Hi,

I am a mom. And like most moms (and some dads), I am over whelmed ALL the time. I have devoted my life to raising my kids, only I am not raising them, I am going through life like a zombie. Everyday is the same routine, we go to bed and its all the same again. I have always harbored anger in my heart and at times they see this. They hear it. I need it to stop.

About a year ago I found and purchased this book Triggers(Exchanging Parents' Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses) by Amber Lia & Wendy Speake. One year later I finally cracked it open.

And so the journey begins. I decided to share it here. Hope Ya'll don't mind. Feel free to join me.

Section One: External Triggers - When it has everything to do with them ...

Disobedience
Scriptures:
1 John 5:3
Psalm 16:6
Proverbs 16:7

Obedient acts are blessings disguised as boundaries.

When are kids disobey us, we have an immediate opportunity to model obedience ourselves by being slow to anger, long-suffering, and gracious.

"His commandments are not burdensome"

Q&A
How can you practically deal with this trigger in your own life?

Well I failed at this, this morning. I have been sick for weeks on and off, but that doesn't mean I get time off (mentally). All of yesterday I was in bed coughing up a lung and with migraines. All the while going through the checklist of errands and projects I had planned that were now being pushed back. Also wondering what was not happening outside my bedroom, like the kitchen being torn about by my boys and husband. Sure enough, I woke up at 6 this morning only to find a sink full of dishes. And I WENT OFF!!!!! At 6 am. I didnt care who was asleep. I was still coughing up a lung. And I did not have this book in mind or God for that matter, only to ask him why is my family so hateful. Because thats what it feels like when youre so sick to move and yet no one is worried about you enough or at all to help you in the slightest way.

What are some reasons your child(ren) disobeys you? How can you reach the root and speak to their heart so you can guide them to understanding?
I very quickly realize that before I can even answer these questions, I need to get to the root of my own issues. It would be hypocritical of me to speak to their hearts when mine is full of anger and resentment. I have a long ways to go but I'm going to keep moving on. The mere jotting of words are already helping a bit.

Id like to hear yours ...
Hey 594, sounds like you have some life things going on?! Glad you made it welcome to the CC!! 🤠
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
9,573
4,389
113
#5
Welcome S94NY! That sounds like a topic requiring an abundance of coffee. Fortunately, it's good around here. :)
 

Bingo

Well-known member
Feb 9, 2019
1,289
847
113
#6
Hi,

I am a mom. And like most moms (and some dads), I am over whelmed ALL the time. I have devoted my life to raising my kids, only I am not raising them, I am going through life like a zombie. Everyday is the same routine, we go to bed and its all the same again. I have always harbored anger in my heart and at times they see this. They hear it. I need it to stop.

About a year ago I found and purchased this book Triggers(Exchanging Parents' Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses) by Amber Lia & Wendy Speake. One year later I finally cracked it open.

And so the journey begins. I decided to share it here. Hope Ya'll don't mind. Feel free to join me.

Section One: External Triggers - When it has everything to do with them ...

Disobedience
Scriptures:
1 John 5:3
Psalm 16:6
Proverbs 16:7

Obedient acts are blessings disguised as boundaries.

When are kids disobey us, we have an immediate opportunity to model obedience ourselves by being slow to anger, long-suffering, and gracious.

"His commandments are not burdensome"

Q&A
How can you practically deal with this trigger in your own life?

Well I failed at this, this morning. I have been sick for weeks on and off, but that doesn't mean I get time off (mentally). All of yesterday I was in bed coughing up a lung and with migraines. All the while going through the checklist of errands and projects I had planned that were now being pushed back. Also wondering what was not happening outside my bedroom, like the kitchen being torn about by my boys and husband. Sure enough, I woke up at 6 this morning only to find a sink full of dishes. And I WENT OFF!!!!! At 6 am. I didnt care who was asleep. I was still coughing up a lung. And I did not have this book in mind or God for that matter, only to ask him why is my family so hateful. Because thats what it feels like when youre so sick to move and yet no one is worried about you enough or at all to help you in the slightest way.

What are some reasons your child(ren) disobeys you? How can you reach the root and speak to their heart so you can guide them to understanding?
I very quickly realize that before I can even answer these questions, I need to get to the root of my own issues. It would be hypocritical of me to speak to their hearts when mine is full of anger and resentment. I have a long ways to go but I'm going to keep moving on. The mere jotting of words are already helping a bit.

Id like to hear yours ...
Friendly.png
"Hello....Welcome to CC. I hope within these pages you find encouragement and spiritual strength.
"Sharing our experiences, strengths, hopes, interests, faith...life happening in general.

For we are here to learn, share, love, appreciate and to give of ourselves."
'Praise God'
 

Attachments

calibob

Sinner saved by grace
May 29, 2018
5,126
3,584
113
65
lawton ok
#7
Hi,

I am a mom. And like most moms (and some dads), I am over whelmed ALL the time. I have devoted my life to raising my kids, only I am not raising them, I am going through life like a zombie. Everyday is the same routine, we go to bed and its all the same again. I have always harbored anger in my heart and at times they see this. They hear it. I need it to stop.

About a year ago I found and purchased this book Triggers(Exchanging Parents' Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses) by Amber Lia & Wendy Speake. One year later I finally cracked it open.

And so the journey begins. I decided to share it here. Hope Ya'll don't mind. Feel free to join me.

Section One: External Triggers - When it has everything to do with them ...

Disobedience
Scriptures:
1 John 5:3
Psalm 16:6
Proverbs 16:7

Obedient acts are blessings disguised as boundaries.

When are kids disobey us, we have an immediate opportunity to model obedience ourselves by being slow to anger, long-suffering, and gracious.

"His commandments are not burdensome"

Q&A
How can you practically deal with this trigger in your own life?

Well I failed at this, this morning. I have been sick for weeks on and off, but that doesn't mean I get time off (mentally). All of yesterday I was in bed coughing up a lung and with migraines. All the while going through the checklist of errands and projects I had planned that were now being pushed back. Also wondering what was not happening outside my bedroom, like the kitchen being torn about by my boys and husband. Sure enough, I woke up at 6 this morning only to find a sink full of dishes. And I WENT OFF!!!!! At 6 am. I didnt care who was asleep. I was still coughing up a lung. And I did not have this book in mind or God for that matter, only to ask him why is my family so hateful. Because thats what it feels like when youre so sick to move and yet no one is worried about you enough or at all to help you in the slightest way.

What are some reasons your child(ren) disobeys you? How can you reach the root and speak to their heart so you can guide them to understanding?
I very quickly realize that before I can even answer these questions, I need to get to the root of my own issues. It would be hypocritical of me to speak to their hearts when mine is full of anger and resentment. I have a long ways to go but I'm going to keep moving on. The mere jotting of words are already helping a bit.

Id like to hear yours ...
Fortunately my kid are in their 30's now but I can remember when they were young, rebellious and testing new boundaries. While I was a single parent. I remember how patient my folks were with me when I was going through the same stages. That's all I can tell you. Welcome to CC.
 

Deade

Called of God
Dec 17, 2017
8,929
4,853
113
73
#10
Hello S94NY, welcome to CC. I hope you'll enjoy your stay here.

glitter-hello-text-smiley-emoticon.gif

 

TabinRivCA

Well-known member
Oct 23, 2018
2,293
1,918
113
#11
Welcome to CC and nice to meet you. I survived raising 3 children and trust me , it all works out. I found out, after a lot of hit & misses, that being a steadfast role model and expecting respect from children, does wonders. God hears our prayers always, God bless!
 

Waggles

Senior Member
Sep 21, 2017
3,031
1,076
113
South
adelaiderevival.com
#12
I am a mom. And like most moms (and some dads), I am over whelmed ALL the time. I have devoted my life to raising my kids, only I am not raising them, I am going through life like a zombie.
I thank God that at the time my wife died and I became a widower with a daughter, and two very young boys, I had just
been converted to Christian faith.
I survived through abundant prayers and throwing myself upon God for help.
That was 23 years ago and they have grown up and my daughter has given me three grandchildren to pray over. :)