My non-Christian coworker

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NOV25

Well-known member
Nov 23, 2019
976
385
63
#1
I work with this guy and for the last 15 years he comes to me at least once a week asking how to be saved. He works the Sunday shift, doesn’t attend a church, so I’m basically his only source for biblical teaching. Every time he asks how to be saved I simply say, “try to be more like Jesus.” He occasionally mentions a problem like alcoholism, to which I quote a bible verse on how being a drunkard is wrong and again tell him, try to be more like Jesus. He’s cheating on his wife, I quote a verse on adultery and give a call to action, be more like Christ. This has been the pattern for 15 years and he is still cheating on his wife, getting drunk every other night and coming to me week after week seeking advice on how to be saved.
Is my approach, the quoting of scripture paired with a call to action, biblical? What am I doing wrong?
 
Feb 28, 2016
11,311
2,972
113
#2
after a couple of decades, maybe it's time for you to do some research and also learn
how to take a hint...
you're either a saint or you're really naïve, and need some help...
 

JohnRH

Junior Member
Mar 5, 2018
534
259
63
#3
I work with this guy and for the last 15 years he comes to me at least once a week asking how to be saved. He works the Sunday shift, doesn’t attend a church, so I’m basically his only source for biblical teaching. Every time he asks how to be saved I simply say, “try to be more like Jesus.” He occasionally mentions a problem like alcoholism, to which I quote a bible verse on how being a drunkard is wrong and again tell him, try to be more like Jesus. He’s cheating on his wife, I quote a verse on adultery and give a call to action, be more like Christ. This has been the pattern for 15 years and he is still cheating on his wife, getting drunk every other night and coming to me week after week seeking advice on how to be saved.
Is my approach, the quoting of scripture paired with a call to action, biblical? What am I doing wrong?
Trying to be more like Jesus isn't the way to be saved; believing in Jesus is.

Then he called for a light, and sprang in, and came trembling, and fell down before Paul and Silas, 30 And brought them out, and said, Sirs, what must I do to be saved? 31 And they said, Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved, and thy house.
Acts 16:29-31 (KJV)
 

fungrandma

New member
Mar 6, 2020
14
10
3
#4
I work with this guy and for the last 15 years he comes to me at least once a week asking how to be saved. He works the Sunday shift, doesn’t attend a church, so I’m basically his only source for biblical teaching. Every time he asks how to be saved I simply say, “try to be more like Jesus.” He occasionally mentions a problem like alcoholism, to which I quote a bible verse on how being a drunkard is wrong and again tell him, try to be more like Jesus. He’s cheating on his wife, I quote a verse on adultery and give a call to action, be more like Christ. This has been the pattern for 15 years and he is still cheating on his wife, getting drunk every other night and coming to me week after week seeking advice on how to be saved.
Is my approach, the quoting of scripture paired with a call to action, biblical? What am I doing wrong?
I think just being like Jesus to them. Invite them to church and let the Holy Spirit do the convicting. He obviously sees Jesus in you. And feels at peace about coming to you. My neighbor came to church with me and finally one day she just. Walked up to my pastor and said I need to be saved. Then she felt convicted about being baptized. That was Jesus not me.
 
Feb 28, 2016
11,311
2,972
113
#5
parody = 'spiritual advisor' =

EPH 5:7.
Be not you therefore partakers with 'them'.
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
3,672
2,890
113
#6
I work with this guy and for the last 15 years he comes to me at least once a week asking how to be saved. He works the Sunday shift, doesn’t attend a church, so I’m basically his only source for biblical teaching. Every time he asks how to be saved I simply say, “try to be more like Jesus.” He occasionally mentions a problem like alcoholism, to which I quote a bible verse on how being a drunkard is wrong and again tell him, try to be more like Jesus. He’s cheating on his wife, I quote a verse on adultery and give a call to action, be more like Christ. This has been the pattern for 15 years and he is still cheating on his wife, getting drunk every other night and coming to me week after week seeking advice on how to be saved.
Is my approach, the quoting of scripture paired with a call to action, biblical? What am I doing wrong?
You're advising him to change himself and then wondering why it's not working? You've not given him a correct answer in 15 years.
Being like Jesus is your aim After salvation, not to be saved. The OT already proved your advice wrong. It would seem he's asking the wrong person, hence the lack of fruit.
My advice is to learn the truth about salvation before giving answers. Otherwise you'll just continue misleading him.
 

GaryA

Truth, Honesty, Love, Courage
Aug 10, 2019
9,104
3,972
113
mywebsite.us
#7
What am I doing wrong?
You are not answering his question.

First - make sure you are saved.

Did someone once tell you to "be more like Jesus" in order to be saved?

Did you just recite some repeat-after-me prayer, or did you really mean it?

Do you know and understand what it means to be born-again - from within - by the Holy Spirit of God?

Do you have that special relationship with the Creator because of His only begotten Son?

Second - assuming you are born-again - give your coworker the gospel.

Make sure he understands why he needs to be saved. And then, show him from the scriptures how to be saved.

If you need some help in that area - research/review/study "The Roman Road"...

(This is the 'quick' answer. I hope it is sufficient.)
 
Dec 30, 2019
1,266
290
83
#8
What am I doing wrong?
I do not see anything in there about how it is the power of God that does a work to transform us. When I got saved I told a friend I did not understand the Bible. He advised me to pray and ask the Holy Spirit of God to help me to understand. That little bit of advice has done more to help me than sitting though hundreds or even thousand of hours of sermons. It is God that does a work in us. WE can not do this on our own apart from God.
 

JaumeJ

Senior Member
Jul 2, 2011
21,236
6,530
113
#9
I work with this guy and for the last 15 years he comes to me at least once a week asking how to be saved. He works the Sunday shift, doesn’t attend a church, so I’m basically his only source for biblical teaching. Every time he asks how to be saved I simply say, “try to be more like Jesus.” He occasionally mentions a problem like alcoholism, to which I quote a bible verse on how being a drunkard is wrong and again tell him, try to be more like Jesus. He’s cheating on his wife, I quote a verse on adultery and give a call to action, be more like Christ. This has been the pattern for 15 years and he is still cheating on his wife, getting drunk every other night and coming to me week after week seeking advice on how to be saved.
Is my approach, the quoting of scripture paired with a call to action, biblical? What am I doing wrong?
It is very important when sharing the Lord's commands, laws and desires that the first and most important priciple to "apply" is mercy, then justice and faith.

Ratherr than first telling this nonbeliever being a drunkard is wrong, perhaps it is better to show what Jesus teaches about our being corrupted not by what enters the belly but by what proceeds from the heart, for nothing by entering the body corrupts.

Later when this has been understood perhaps you could mention that nothing should have power over a person in Christ other than Christ, that being lust, addictions, hatred etc.

Let the child know that our Lord will free each of us fully in His truth.

Now having said this, there is no set process for any other than to BELIEVE Jesus, Yeshua, and follow His teaching and dExample as best we are given to be possible, for our perfection is a work begun by Him and only completed by Him come the Kifgdom. God bless you for your patience, longsuffering and good works in others.
 

Adstar

Senior Member
Jul 24, 2016
7,426
3,479
113
#10
I work with this guy and for the last 15 years he comes to me at least once a week asking how to be saved. He works the Sunday shift, doesn’t attend a church, so I’m basically his only source for biblical teaching. Every time he asks how to be saved I simply say, “try to be more like Jesus.” He occasionally mentions a problem like alcoholism, to which I quote a bible verse on how being a drunkard is wrong and again tell him, try to be more like Jesus. He’s cheating on his wife, I quote a verse on adultery and give a call to action, be more like Christ. This has been the pattern for 15 years and he is still cheating on his wife, getting drunk every other night and coming to me week after week seeking advice on how to be saved.
Is my approach, the quoting of scripture paired with a call to action, biblical? What am I doing wrong?
No one is saved by ""trying to be more like Jesus"" Because no human being can perform up to that perfect level..

People are saved by believing Jesus and trusting in the Atonement Jesus secured for them on the cross..

He sounds like he has a totally works salvation mindset.. He knows He fails to be like Jesus.. So He is desperately trying to find out from you how he can be perfect like Jesus.. Talk about Mission impossible.. What a unbearably heavy yoke to carry on ones shoulders .. Trying to be like Jesus..
 

fungrandma

New member
Mar 6, 2020
14
10
3
#11
You are not answering his question.

First - make sure you are saved.

Did someone once tell you to "be more like Jesus" in order to be saved?

Did you just recite some repeat-after-me prayer, or did you really mean it?

Do you know and understand what it means to be born-again - from within - by the Holy Spirit of God?

Do you have that special relationship with the Creator because of His only begotten Son?

Second - assuming you are born-again - give your coworker the gospel.

Make sure he understands why he needs to be saved. And then, show him from the scriptures how to be saved.

If you need some help in that area - research/review/study "The Roman Road"...

(This is the 'quick' answer. I hope it is sufficient.)
 

fungrandma

New member
Mar 6, 2020
14
10
3
#12
I was practically born into the church later on my dad became a minister. I certainly understand the Bible. In my relationship with Jesus Christ. When I went through my divorce after 35 years of marriage which I did not choose. I begin to search the Scriptures to see what Jesus had to say about divorce and other things. But what I found most of all was his love for me through the many people that he went to. So I I left my life that I was comfortable with and moved to a city that was so infested with opioids which I had no idea. And I just want to love people for Jesus. And just living my every day life people started coming to me and talking to me and I just love them where they were and Jesus did the life changing in them not me I just loveThem where they were just as Jesus did. You can preach all you want but if you only live it on Sunday people will not want our Jesus.
 

Demi777

Senior Member
Oct 13, 2014
6,877
1,949
113
Germany
#13
Ur not teaching repentance. Your just slamming him with scriptures. If course that wont help
 
E

EleventhHour

Guest
#14
I work with this guy and for the last 15 years he comes to me at least once a week asking how to be saved. He works the Sunday shift, doesn’t attend a church, so I’m basically his only source for biblical teaching. Every time he asks how to be saved I simply say, “try to be more like Jesus.” He occasionally mentions a problem like alcoholism, to which I quote a bible verse on how being a drunkard is wrong and again tell him, try to be more like Jesus. He’s cheating on his wife, I quote a verse on adultery and give a call to action, be more like Christ. This has been the pattern for 15 years and he is still cheating on his wife, getting drunk every other night and coming to me week after week seeking advice on how to be saved.
Is my approach, the quoting of scripture paired with a call to action, biblical? What am I doing wrong?
No one is saved by trying to be more like Jesus.
 
E

eternally-gratefull

Guest
#15
1. Your showing him how to follow the law. and not how to be healed from his sin. No one will be saved by the law.
2. does he admit he is doing all those sins and needs saved (the first step)
3. if he does, You should show him Christ and the cross. and show him the only way to be saved is to call out for Gods mercy
4. If not. He still needs to repent. and no matter what you tell him he probably will not heal
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,320
16,306
113
69
Tennessee
#16
I work with this guy and for the last 15 years he comes to me at least once a week asking how to be saved. He works the Sunday shift, doesn’t attend a church, so I’m basically his only source for biblical teaching. Every time he asks how to be saved I simply say, “try to be more like Jesus.” He occasionally mentions a problem like alcoholism, to which I quote a bible verse on how being a drunkard is wrong and again tell him, try to be more like Jesus. He’s cheating on his wife, I quote a verse on adultery and give a call to action, be more like Christ. This has been the pattern for 15 years and he is still cheating on his wife, getting drunk every other night and coming to me week after week seeking advice on how to be saved.
Is my approach, the quoting of scripture paired with a call to action, biblical? What am I doing wrong?
Trying to be more like Jesus, while admirable, will not result in salvation, but rather trying to be more like Jesus would be a manifestation of salvation and repentance.

Tell your co-worker that to be assured of salvation he must be born again. To do this you must be sorry for your sinful life and confess this to Jesus. The shedding of His precious blood for the remission of sins results in salvation. Afterwards, he should invite the Holy Spirit to live inside of his heart to comfort and guide him in the life-long repentance process, in other words, trying to be more like Jesus.

Alcoholism is a disease that can be overcome with the grace of God but cheating on his wife is a serious character flaw that resides deep in his heart that has irrevocably destroyed the marital trust.

My counsel is to explain about being born again to him at the next opportunity. My counsel to his wife is to seek a divorce attorney. A man that loves his wife would never even think about cheating on her let alone actually do it. No woman should have to tolerate a husband who is an abusive alcoholic that cheats on her.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,320
16,306
113
69
Tennessee
#18
You are not answering his question.

First - make sure you are saved.

Did someone once tell you to "be more like Jesus" in order to be saved?

Did you just recite some repeat-after-me prayer, or did you really mean it?

Do you know and understand what it means to be born-again - from within - by the Holy Spirit of God?

Do you have that special relationship with the Creator because of His only begotten Son?

Second - assuming you are born-again - give your coworker the gospel.

Make sure he understands why he needs to be saved. And then, show him from the scriptures how to be saved.

If you need some help in that area - research/review/study "The Roman Road"...

(This is the 'quick' answer. I hope it is sufficient.)
This is most wise spiritual counsel.
 
E

eternally-gratefull

Guest
#19
Trying to be more like Jesus, while admirable, will not result in salvation, but rather trying to be more like Jesus would be a manifestation of salvation and repentance.

Tell your co-worker that to be assured of salvation he must be born again. To do this you must be sorry for your sinful life and confess this to Jesus. The shedding of His precious blood for the remission of sins results in salvation. Afterwards, he should invite the Holy Spirit to live inside of his heart to comfort and guide him in the life-long repentance process, in other words, trying to be more like Jesus.

Alcoholism is a disease that can be overcome with the grace of God but cheating on his wife is a serious character flaw that resides deep in his heart that has irrevocably destroyed the marital trust.

My counsel is to explain about being born again to him at the next opportunity. My counsel to his wife is to seek a divorce attorney. A man that loves his wife would never even think about cheating on her let alone actually do it. No woman should have to tolerate a husband who is an abusive alcoholic that cheats on her.
Amen. We can’t be like Jesus. That’s why we had to be rescued (saved)
 
L

Locoponydirtman

Guest
#20
I work with this guy and for the last 15 years he comes to me at least once a week asking how to be saved. He works the Sunday shift, doesn’t attend a church, so I’m basically his only source for biblical teaching. Every time he asks how to be saved I simply say, “try to be more like Jesus.” He occasionally mentions a problem like alcoholism, to which I quote a bible verse on how being a drunkard is wrong and again tell him, try to be more like Jesus. He’s cheating on his wife, I quote a verse on adultery and give a call to action, be more like Christ. This has been the pattern for 15 years and he is still cheating on his wife, getting drunk every other night and coming to me week after week seeking advice on how to be saved.
Is my approach, the quoting of scripture paired with a call to action, biblical? What am I doing wrong?
Yes and no. It's not be more like Jesus, it believe in Jesus, who he is and what he has done, be baptised, and repent of your sins.
There is far more to adultery than stop it. There is a whole bunch of ways to treat and see your wife that changes the paradigm.
There is more than stop drinking for the alcoholic, there is dealing with the real problems that undergird the alcohol abuse.
You have been attempting to wash the outside of the cup. The poison is on the inside.