Does God choose your spouse or do you with God's guidance?

I believe there is one person who God clearly shows us. There are a lot of good people/Christians who will likely make good spouses. So can any good Christian be a our spouse? That seems to be a low bar. It's like a husband/wife telling their spouse they could have found another good spouse if they didn't meet them. While probably true, I prefer to believe that God will choose someone specially for us and will show a sign.

During the Biblical times, being a virgin was synonymous with being unmarried and specifically refers to an unmarried woman.

I do not believe the term virgin was applied to men. So, a woman would wear garments for virgins to show other suitors she is available; otherwise there is no way to know and men may mistaken married women as potential wives. Before, there was a logical explanation for the different clothes.

Nowadays, there are far less virgins and being unmarried has less correlation to virginity status. Publicly identifying as a virgin would bring out guys who have insincere goals, creeps, etc. so it is better to keep this information private.

The other issue is, being a young virgin would be considered understandable, but people may have some negative views or make some assumptions on "old" virgins. While this is nothing to be ashamed of, there is no need to publicly put forth this information.

Depending on the age of the person, I believe it is best to assume the person is not a virgin and not discuss sexual history (or better, relationship history) right away, but rather first learn if the person is compatible in other ways (values, personality, goals, etc.).

On a serious note, I think that "we" talk from both corners of our mouths when we say, "God has a plan for my life" and then turn right around and say, "But I choose . . ." (fill in the blank).

We can't say that God has a Plan for our lives but then say that we have our own independent plan.

If God has a Will and we have a will . . . who's will out-wins the other? Does God get what He wants, or do we get what we want?

'God has a plan for my life' comes from a Campus Crusade tract?

Does saying, 'God has a plan for your life' really give us Biblical direction on whether we make decisions and He is arranging stuff behind the scenes, or whether He gives us direction?

trusting Him to work things out.

How can we claim that we are in control of our lives and then turn around and quote the below Scripture. Oh wait, who quotes the below Scripture?

Romans 8:9 NLT - "But you are not controlled by your sinful nature. You are controlled by the Spirit if you have the Spirit of God living in you. (And remember that those who do not have the Spirit of Christ living in them do not belong to him at all.)"

If we don't feel like the Holy Spirit is controlling our lives . . . you know what that means? It means the Spirit hasn't Indwelt you.

We'd better wake up and get's things together immediately if not sooner. And, I'd memorize Colossians 2:9-15 pronto.

No. Rebecca wasn't kidnapped , she agreed to go. In fact, her father and brother wanted her to stay 10 days and when Eliezer argued with them, they said they'd bring Rebecca out and ask her what she wanted to do. She came out and said she would go. Genesis 24:58

She probably recognized a good thing when she saw it. A wealthy man wanting to marry her? Who wouldn't accept such an offer in that time era and culture? She'd be set for life!

In the OT parents set up both bride and groom or else the man negotiated the marriage with the father except for widows like Abigail.

There is no mention of two people standing before a priest or elder to make vows. That seems to have been a later modification of a Roman preChistian wedding ceremony. Boaz did call in elders of the city as witnesses to his redeeming a deceased relative's estate.

Rachel consented to her wedding. Jewish tradition requires bridal consent, possibly based on examples like this. It would be tough for both bride and groom otherwise.

Marrying your parents' choice might not seem horrific if everyone did it, if people did not grow up watching movies and TV sows against the idea abd romances, and if all you had to go on for looks were 500 cousins in your village instead of images of the most beautiful faces in the world on TV, film, magazines, and the Internet.

I have no idea. I would say, however, that considering that a person can walk into any church in the world and hear people acknowledge that God has a plan for their life, this is a rational and reasonable deduction of God's Holy Word. The real question that should be asked is, "Which of the following do I relate with? Am I controlled by the Sinful Nature or by the Spirit? And if I don't relate to my life being controlled by the Spirit, then I cannot belong to Christ AT ALL."

Romans 8:9 NLT - "But you are not controlled by your sinful nature. You are controlled by the Spirit if you have the Spirit of God living in you. (And remember that those who do not have the Spirit of Christ living in them do not belong to him at all.)"



Presidente . . . tell us if you feel like God is controlling your thoughts and decisions? Are you running your life or is the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit dictating? Remember, if you don't identify with a "controlling" Spirit in your life, then it means that you do not belong to Christ "at all."



Well, so above, you acknowledge that God is in control, working things out.

I don't know about you all, but I am NOT in control over my life. My life is not the way that I would like it to be. I have suffered beyond imagination. I have been blamed and accused of things that are plainly opposite. I have been hated in this world for doing good things for others. Loving people has been a total burden. Giving money to people has not been recognized by authorities while under accusations of stealing. Attempting to create a Christian non-profit organization has gone unrecognized by the government, thus persecuted for being said in court documents that I "channel the Lord" or that I am a "master of chaos." I do not channel the Lord nor am I a master of chaos. Instead, I have been the victim of the government's sense of chaotic manufacturing and overall cluster-nightmare!

The LAST thing I would ever claim is to be in control over my life. God has led me down a path that only he could create, for the evens of my life are utterly impossible unless He were in control.

Do we not understand the Holy Word, Endure? Or do all of the peaceful Christians of the world just think that there are some Christians that are simply unlucky? Do we really think that the Christian life is about hummingbirds, butterflies and rose pedals? Scripture is clear that those who live pain-free, wantan lives . . . these people do not have the Lord as their Father. But those who are of the poor and the oppressed, they are the ones that God loves. But again, do we simply tell ourselves that some Christians are unlucky to be poor and oppressed while we live our Jimmy Swaggart and Kenneth Copeland lives?

Lastly, those who do not belong to God are NOT receiving His Holy Discipline. And those who receive the Lord's Holy Discipline . . . well, they're suffering. So if "you" aren't being Disciplined by the Lord; if "you" are not "Enduring" suffering and false persecution, then perhaps you're right . . . you are not being controlled by the Spirit. But if that's True, then "you" do not belong to Christ "at all."

We should probably take this somewhere else.

hmm I think in marriage many people DO suffer especially the wives being long suffering

Exactly. My former wife actually beat me and taught her children, my step-children, that it was allowed and not considered violence because I was such a big person and that it couldn't hurt me. So . . . who was in control? Was I in control of my marriage? Was my wife in control of her marriage with me? I know for a fact that I [wasn't] in control, for if I were, things would have turned out much, much differently. My service to her was incredible. My service to her children was incredible.

The Lord is silently in control while we are not. Moreover, I would conclude that God allowed my marriage so that I would grow, learn, and mature. I would say that my marriage existed so that the Lord's Discipline would become manifest. I know for certain, that if I did not suffer, I would have never learned; I would have never grown.

Think of Kenneth Copeland. Is he suffering? Is he telling the Truth about the Gospel of Christ? But what would happen to his teachings if the Lord led him down a life and path of say, the Apostle Paul? Would Kenneth's message change? Oh my, yes.

Ultimately, we should be identifying with suffering. If we're not suffering, we're not living Godly lives and thus we do not belong to Christ at all.

2 Timothy 3:12 NLT - "Yes, and everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution."

Romans 8:9 NLT - "But you are not controlled by your sinful nature. You are controlled by the Spirit if you have the Spirit of God living in you. (And remember that those who do not have the Spirit of Christ living in them do not belong to him at all.)

aw sorry to hear that

hmm I think in marriage many people DO suffer especially the wives being long suffering, many get no recongnition or thanks or even pay for what they do...often its a thankless task being a wife. If your husband, normally kind and loving, one day comes home drunk and out of it, or suddendly dies then you have another thing to deal with altogether

His belief is that she should do most of the work because she is younger