Do you lie to your spouse............for correction?

If your spouse keeps on with poor habits, do you lie to get something corrected? I do. My wife overstuffs cabinets. So when I tell her, I'll say, "Luvee, you put to many glasses & cups in the cabinet & when i opened the cabinet door, 3 cups & glasses fell out". really, only 1 fell out. Or, near our microwave, she has a pile of "stuff"' & if you position the coffee maker to use, her stuff gets scattered in that area, sometimes, falling to the floor! & I'll tell her 5 things fell when just 1 or 2. So what's your story on this everyone?

I think you can tell her she is messy and it causes you some anxiety. If you show her how it is affecting you, she may get more organized. At the same time, you cannot be unreasonable; she may never be as neat as you would like. Or, you can also help with the tidyness. I don't think it is necessary to state extra cups fell.

I've been "attacked" more than once by an overstuffed cabinet. I've become somewhat of a minimalist, which is the opposite of my wife. Funny thing is, she sometimes complains about my stuff being too much.. usually my "coffee."

You gotta lie to make a change happen?

That would worry me a bit if my wife felt she had to tell me a lie to get me to change something.

no anxiety here. i do not allow anxiety in my life. I'm a peaceful person almost always using wisdom & sometimes, no words at all to correct something or someone. we are 'busy-a-holics in work & play so now & then things get out of hand.

in fact, it's back to work now after an 11 minute break!

you can never have to much Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee! nyuknyuknyuk!!!

No, not an issue I have. Hubby is more organized than I am and I thought I was a very tidy person. If you walk into his closet you'd swear you walked into a department store! Everything is perfect, never been in the military. lol If I have a day where I have to rush off and help my parents he will say to be later " I organized your closet babe". I don't recall ever having to lie about anything though.

I would admit I was getting an accumulation of "stuff" with having room in the basement and a big shed we used our Covid money on. lol But my nephew got married and they had nothing to start with. So had all kinds of things they needed and was even able to give them my stove! I was glad that I held on to certain things that they needed. Maybe check and see if there is someone in your family or friends that could use your stuff more. Perhaps your wife would be willing to part with some things if she saw it was helping others.

Agreed. I need to get back to Jamaica to get some more.

Tell the truth - do not exaggerate - let good reasoning make the correction - deception has its reward - and, it can only add complication to the equation.

i also organize everything perfectly. for instance, in my garage & cabinets in the house & refrigerator, i have all labels facing the front so they can be read easily.

i understand. sometimes my strategy works & sometimes not.

you can't win with her. 99% of the time, nothing works with her.

Occasionally, I have been known to embellish the established facts to get a point across. I deal with the clutter too.

Do what I do - nod your head yes and say that you're sorry.

I'm only offering an opinion that might help solve your problem area.
Always remember that we all have strengths and weaknesses. I don't like husbands in a gathering exposing their wives' flaws anymore than the wives gossipping about their husbands. There should be unity in the marriage relationship. Sins like those will separate and make matters worse with resentment and long term damage.

Since you are the leader in this relationship, and the more organized one, I would suggest the following.

1. Recognize that weakness and perhaps character flaw.
2. Rather than approach her in frustration at the time of frustration or anger, correct the problem as is needed to keep the china from getting further broken.
3. Think about specific ways she is motivated. Everyone is different. Husbands are required to get to know their wives.
4. Come up with a simple plan of approaching her in a non emotional way, but in a way that will help the household become more amicable to both of you.
5. Set a schedule in your planner to accomplish one task with her. For instance, you can kindly let her know that you set a day and time to clean and reshelve the cupboards. You want to work on it with her, like a team. Note that you are not putting her down or chastising her. You are enlisting her as the helper that God created her to be. Think positive motivation so she will enjoy the process of working WITH you and the outcome.
6. Let her know that you will start today when you go to the store to get plastic storage containers. Ask if she has enough plastic bags to wrap the excess cups and dinnerware in.
She assesses and let's you know if you should buy any.
7. Project day, you ask her how many she needs for setting the table. Perhaps you can have enough handy for company or holiday gatherings. Perhaps it needs to be gotten out of storage then. Everything is wiped down and shelf relined or whatever you want.
The sealed container gets a label and goes into the attic.

Everyone is happy and has the positive sense of accomplishment!
🍵🙂👍

Next, ask if there's anything that she would like from you.

I got a touch of OCD too.

I learned a long time ago that I would rather be happy than proven right - especially if being right might be a cause of hurt feelings. Basically, I just go with the flow.