If You Had to Describe Your Depression to Someone, What Would You Say That It's Like?

I had a friend a long time ago who told me he was trying to understand my depression, because he didn't feel like he'd ever really struggled with it. So he asked God to let him go through a depression in order to see what it was like.

He described it as a heavy, crushing fog and smoke that cluttered his mind and heart, and black as when God struck Egypt with the plague of darkness (the Bible says it was SO dark, that no one could go anywhere for 3 days because they couldn't see anyone or anything in front of them -- but God spared His people from this and gave them light during this time.)

He said that for 3 days, he felt like he couldn't think anything through and that his heart was being crushed with despair. After experiencing that, he felt that he now knew better how to pray for people going through it.

Hey Everyone,

I have struggled with depression all my life, and sometimes the holidays are among of the hardest times. Over the years, I've sought medical help, Christian counseling, and healthier lifestyle choices to combat it, but it seems to linger in one form or another.

I have been thinking a lot about how almost everything in life is experienced differently by different people, and that my "version" of depression might not look/feel like it does for someone else.

What does your own (or someone you know) experiences with depression look/feel like? How would you describe it?

I had a friend a long time ago who told me he was trying to understand my depression, because he didn't feel like he'd ever really struggled with it. So he asked God to let him go through a depression in order to see what it was like.

He described it as a heavy, crushing fog and smoke that cluttered his mind and heart, and black as when God struck Egypt with the plague of darkness (the Bible says it was SO dark, that no one could go anywhere for 3 days because they couldn't see anyone or anything in front of them -- but God spared His people from this and gave them light during this time.)

He said that for 3 days, he felt like he couldn't think anything through and that his heart was being crushed with despair. After experiencing that, he felt that he now knew better how to pray for people going through it.

I'd say that's a pretty accurate description of how I experience depression too, except that mine has changed slightly over the years. A family member suggested years ago that I get tested for ADHD, but I never have, seeing as everyone I know who has is just put on medication that often makes them worse. My brain often feels like a puzzle in which the pieces are coming apart, and I'm trying to hold them all together in order to keep functioning.

When I have serious bouts of depression, it feels like jolts of painful emotional shocks are splitting all the pieces apart, and I'm trying to somehow deal with the pain from the emotional shocks, the searing feeling of the pieces being pried apart, and me trying to hold enough pieces together all at one time to keep functioning. I sometimes call them "mental migraines," because I often feel like I should just shut myself in a dark, quiet room, while holding my head as as symbol of trying to keep it together. (I don't actually do this, though -- there's just too much in life that has to get done.)

I do feel very thankful to God that that He does seem to allow me to hold enough pieces together, or at least override the struggle, with responsibilities. Even in my worst years (because sometimes it's almost that continuous,) I was still able to work and function enough to hold jobs and pay bills. I feel a lot of empathy for people whose entire lives literally stop because of depression.

As stated earlier, I would like to understand what the fight with this illness feels like for others and how they cope with it.

For me, it usually becomes a long session of Bible study and prayer, which is why I think God has never fully healed me -- as much pain as it causes, I know He still uses it for a purpose.

I'm hoping to foster a discussion that will help others share, understand, and help each other more efficiently.

* Do you/have you struggled with depression? Do you know others who have?

* What is your experience like, and/or what have others told you their experiences are like? Is it continuous or in spurts? Is it brought on by certain things, or does it strike at random? Has it changed over time? (How it manifests, what it's like, what brings it on, etc.)

* How has depression (yours and/or others') affected your life?

* What treatments, actions, and lifestyle changes have helped -- or not?

* Any other thoughts on helping others deal with depression, or helping others understand what those who depression are going through?

Thank you for taking the time to contribute to this thread.

Depression is very challenging at times and you never know -- you just might be helping to save a life. 🙏❤️🕯️

I will make two comments though.

1. This sounds more like classical depression, not modern depression. Modern depression is really popular these days, and I believe it comes from boredom, pointlessness and general lack of direction. People feel dissatisfied with their lives, so they claim they are depressed. Yours sounds more like clinical depression, the OG version.

2. Maybe you should get all the diagnoses you can and tinker for a while. I remember this one comedian talking about how she investigated all the pills she took and all the things that each pill was used for, and noticed the one common factor in all her medication was that it was used to treat bipolar one. She talked to her therapist about this, pointed out how all the medications she took were used to treat bipolar one, and the therapist said "oh yeah, how about that!" Wait, is this how you get your diagnosis? We mess around with medications until we find one that works, then figure out what all the pills have in common? So now she knows what she has is bipolar one.

My depression feels like I'm covered head to toe in a very heavy blanket. Too heavy to move around much or escape from. I'm sometimes able to reach out a bit with my arm, but the blanket is too heavy for me to get far and just pulls my arm back down.

I've known many others that have had depression.

My depression hasn't stopped in 35 years. Only the severity of it has changed.
It can spike and get worse when triggered. The most common things that trigger spikes are some music or movies. Also thinking on my present or future.
As a teen it was at it's worst. Now it has mellowed out some, in some ways, and in some ways it's no different.

The part of my depression that has affected me most and that has never changed is my lack of motivation. It makes it difficult for me to do normal day to day things. It also seems to be affecting my memory, moreso now than ever.

I'm currently trying meds. For the first time. Not much else I can do. I could exercise more, but in the past that hasn't helped. My depression seems to be brain chemical imbalances and not related to other forms that can be overcome.

I've helped numerous others with depression or other mental illnesses. No training of any kind, just a combination of personal experiences, learning about others experiences, a little reading up and a natural tendency towards helping others and a natural skill for psychology. And some empathy.

Hey Everyone,

I have struggled with depression all my life, and sometimes the holidays are among of the hardest times.

Hi, seoul.

I am sorry to hear about your struggle with depression, but I sincerely commend you for starting such a potentially helpful thread.

When it comes to the topic of depression, people often describe it as a fight, struggle, battle, or something very similar, and I believe that such terms are very valid. However, I also believe, and this pains me greatly, that a lot of people do not realize exactly what or who they are fighting, struggling, or battling against. Generally speaking, as Christians, this is who our fight, struggle, or battle is truly against.

Eph 6:12
For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
Eph 6:13
Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

As Christians, whether we are consciously aware of it or not, we are fighting, struggling, battling, or wrestling against demonic forces, and I would like to offer two biblical ways in which we can win this wrestling match. As we just read, we need take unto ourselves the whole armor of God in order to be able to withstand such a demonic onslaught, and the piece of our spiritual armor which is most directly related to depression is the following.

Eph 6:17
And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:

1Th 5:8
But let us, who are of the day, be sober, putting on the breastplate of faith and love; and for an helmet, the hope of salvation.

In order to overcome depression, we must be sure to don the helmet of salvation daily or, more specifically, an helmet, the hope of salvation. Seoul, hope is that which God has ordained to protect our minds, and this hope is directly related to that which Christ has accomplished for us via his death, burial, resurrection, ascension, and glorification at the Father's right hand. In other words, because Christ has accomplished all of these things for us, we can have a very real hope, which the Bible calls an anchor of the soul (Heb. 6:19), that we will ultimately share in Christ's victory, and that victory will be fully complete when we receive our glorified bodies at Christ's return.

Let's face it. This world is very unstable, and it is easy for somebody to lose hope or to get depressed as they look at the world around them. However, this is precisely why hope is described as being an anchor of the soul. In other words, in the same way that a boat needs to drop an anchor in order to find stability in the unstable element of water, we need to have an anchor of the soul which can similarly provide us with a sense of stability in this very unstable world, and that anchor is that Christ, our forerunner, has already entered into the Holy of holies in heaven in order to prepare a place for us in his coming kingdom. In fact, during his incarnation, Jesus needed to don the helmet of salvation himself.

Isa 59:16
And he saw that there was no man, and wondered that there was no intercessor: therefore his arm brought salvation unto him; and his righteousness, it sustained him.
Isa 59:17
For he put on righteousness as a breastplate, and an helmet of salvation upon his head; and he put on the garments of vengeance for clothing, and was clad with zeal as a cloke.

In what we just read, Isaiah was prophetically foretelling of Christ's incarnation, and Jesus needed to wear an helmet of salvation upon his head, or he needed to have a very real hope in his own eventual resurrection from the dead in order to overcome. For example, David prophesied the following about Christ.

Psa 16:8
I have set the LORD always before me: because he is at my right hand, I shall not be moved.
Psa 16:9
Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoiceth: my flesh also shall rest in hope.
Psa 16:10
For thou wilt not leave my soul in hell; neither wilt thou suffer thine Holy One to see corruption.
Psa 16:11
Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy; at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore.

During his incarnation, Jesus always set the LORD, or God the Father, before him, and he had a very real hope which sustained him even unto the point of death. And what was that hope? That his soul would not be left in hell (Sheol), nor would his flesh see corruption. In other words, he had promises from his Father of his eventual resurrection from the dead and glorification, and that is what helped him to overcome in this world. Like Jesus, we need to ever cling to such a hope ourselves, or else we are bound to get depressed at times.

When I was wrestling against depression myself years ago, in my desperation, I came upon the following teaching series on Hope, and it tremendously helped me. Here is a link to it in case you or anybody else might be interested in listening to it yourselves.


I do have much more to say in relation to who we are truly fighting, struggling, battling, or wrestling against when it comes to the topic of depression, but I will say it in another post because this one is getting to be rather long.

Well... Perhaps.

While this is true for some, for other people their depression has a different source. And then for other, other people, their depression has a different, different source too.

Well... Perhaps.

While this is true for some, for other people their depression has a different source. And then for other, other people, their depression has a different, different source too.

This is another interesting topic -- the sources of depression. Since depression is often internal (though of course it can manifest in physical symptoms,) I think it can be all too easy to slap it with labels we can't be sure of.

Growing up in church communities, I know a lot of people who don't believe depression exists or think all depression is a spiritual battle. They also say to throw out all your meds and never go to a doctor, because all you need is to believe in Jesus and it should be prayed away. If the depression persists, they squarely blame it on the sufferer because to them, it's a lack of faith.

To me, that's like saying all cancer is a spiritual battle that can be prayed away, and anyone who succumbs to it just "didn't have enough faith." Bull hockey and bologna. But, that's just me.

Yes, all illnesses are a battle, but just because we're going through them -- mental or physical -- I personally don't believe it's all spiritual warfare. But I do see it as something only God knows.

I'm also thinking of places like Japan -- apparently, it's not culturally acceptable for people to say they have mental illness or depression (they're becoming more open about it, but traditionally, it's shunned.)

And so people will most often report symptoms like a headache or stomach pains instead.

If someone there reported having depression, a Christian would definitely think of spiritual warfare as one possibility.

But I'm guessing if the same person reported having a just a headache (which was coming from the same thing -- the depression -- it just manifested in a different way and/or the person didn't want to say it was a mental struggle,) the same Christian might not assume spiritual warfare as quickly.

Rather, they might suggest things such as dehydration and other physical contributions.

I think sometimes depression also has a physiological root (biological issues like hormone imbalances) that just happen to manifest through one's mental state.

This is another interesting topic -- the sources of depression. Since depression is often internal (though of course it can manifest in physical symptoms,) I think it can be all too easy to slap it with labels we can't be sure of.

Growing up in church communities, I know a lot of people who don't believe depression exists or think all depression is a spiritual battle. They also say to throw out all your meds and never go to a doctor, because all you need is to believe in Jesus and it should be prayed away. If the depression persists, they squarely blame it on the sufferer because to them, it's a lack of faith.

To me, that's like saying all cancer is a spiritual battle that can be prayed away, and anyone who succumbs to it just "didn't have enough faith." Bull hockey and bologna. But, that's just me.

Yes, all illnesses are a battle, but just because we're going through them -- mental or physical -- I personally don't believe it's all spiritual warfare. But I do see it as something only God knows.

I'm also thinking of places like Japan -- apparently, it's not culturally acceptable for people to say they have mental illness or depression (they're becoming more open about it, but traditionally, it's shunned.)

And so people will most often report symptoms like a headache or stomach pains instead.

If someone there reported having depression, a Christian would definitely think of spiritual warfare as one possibility.

But I'm guessing if the same person reported having a just a headache (which was coming from the same thing -- the depression -- it just manifested in a different way and/or the person didn't want to say it was a mental struggle,) the same Christian might not assume spiritual warfare as quickly.

Rather, they might suggest things such as dehydration and other physical contributions.

I think sometimes depression also has a physiological root (biological issues like hormone imbalances) that just happen to manifest through one's mental state.

Yikes.

That sounds like a reproof of sorts to what I said. Whether it was intended as such or not, I was not attempting to say that people could not be depressed for other reasons. Instead, my motivation was to help those who have tried other means of obtaining deliverance from depression without any success.

Anyhow, I will just wander back to the BDF with two suits of spiritual armor on. Make that three suits of spiritual armor.

I'm infamous for going off on all sorts of other explorations in my own threads.

Lynx's posts often get me thinking about angles I'd never even considered when writing the original post (though I should have,) and then I start talking (writing) out loud as I'm running down rabbit holes...

His post got me thinking of the people I've encountered in past churches who dismissed the "idea" of depression, always saying it was a lack of faith that could be prayed away -- and not being able to was a person fault -- and probably a sign of not being a "real" Christian.

Their lack of empathy or understanding for anyone with internal struggles was a major reason as to why I left.

Depression is very challenging at times and you never know -- you just might be helping to save a life. 🙏❤️🕯️

That is fine and understandable, but, in order to live up to my username, I feel the need to say something here that I said to a Christian friend on the phone just a few days ago.

I told her "Figuratively speaking, I am a piece of cake (in other words, I am not a typical man), and whenever anybody seeks to fit me into a pre-determined pie chart, they are inevitably going to terribly misread me."

In other words, we all have had experiences with others in the past, but this does not mean that we should immediately attribute what somebody else says to what others have said before them. Two different people can say similar things with two completely different mindsets or heartsets. My posts were fully motivated by my sincere desire to help others. Anyhow, I feel that I should walk away from this thread, with no hard feelings, so, in order to be true to myself, that is what I will do now. Like I said, I commend you for starting such a thread, and I sincerely hope that it somehow helps somebody to truly be delivered from depression. Have a blessed day.

My depression feels like I'm covered head to toe in a very heavy blanket. Too heavy to move around much or escape from. I'm sometimes able to reach out a bit with my arm, but the blanket is too heavy for me to get far and just pulls my arm back down.

I've known many others that have had depression.

My depression hasn't stopped in 35 years. Only the severity of it has changed.
It can spike and get worse when triggered. The most common things that trigger spikes are some music or movies. Also thinking on my present or future.
As a teen it was at it's worst. Now it has mellowed out some, in some ways, and in some ways it's no different.

The part of my depression that has affected me most and that has never changed is my lack of motivation. It makes it difficult for me to do normal day to day things. It also seems to be affecting my memory, moreso now than ever.

I'm currently trying meds. For the first time. Not much else I can do. I could exercise more, but in the past that hasn't helped. My depression seems to be brain chemical imbalances and not related to other forms that can be overcome.

I've helped numerous others with depression or other mental illnesses. No training of any kind, just a combination of personal experiences, learning about others experiences, a little reading up and a natural tendency towards helping others and a natural skill for psychology. And some empathy.

That is fine and understandable, but, in order to live up to my username, I feel the need to say something here that I said to a Christian friend on the phone just a few days ago.

I told her "Figuratively speaking, I am a piece of cake (in other words, I am not a typical man), and whenever anybody seeks to fit me into a pre-determined pie chart, they are inevitably going to terribly misread me."

In other words, we all have had experiences with others in the past, but this does not mean that we should immediately attribute what somebody else says to what others have said before them. Two different people can say similar things with two completely different mindsets or heartsets. My posts were fully motivated by my sincere desire to help others. Anyhow, I feel that I should walk away from this thread, with no hard feelings, so, in order to be true to myself, that is what I will do now. Like I said, I commend you for starting such a thread, and I sincerely hope that it somehow helps somebody to truly be delivered from depression. Have a blessed day.