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Depleted

Guest
Just come across these verses, I've not noticed them before,
hoping they will give you some encouragement.
Bless you Lynn


Psalm 41:1-3 NLT
[1] Oh, the joys of those who are kind to the poor! The LORD rescues them
when they are in trouble. [2] The LORD protects them and keeps them alive.
He gives them prosperity in the land and rescues them from their enemies.
[3] The LORD nurses them when they are sick and restores them to health.


Psalm 41:1-3 NKJV
[1] Blessed is he who considers the poor; The LORD will deliver him in time of trouble.
[2] The LORD will preserve him and keep him alive, And he will be blessed on the earth;
You will not deliver him to the will of his enemies. [3] The LORD will strengthen him
on his bed of illness; You will sustain him on his sickbed.
Oh goodie! We both have poor down pat, so this is a cinch for God. lol

Kidding, sort of, but I do, again, believe God will sustain him up and out of his sick bed.

Poor guy, had his bedsore debreved in surgery again today, so he officially has a big pain in the butt. BUT, some lady came by to talk to him. He can't remember her name or her title, except she's not a psychiatrist. But she did give him a realistic assessment of how he is doing mentally. (He is always checking outside his door to see what's going on. We didn't know that meant he is active in his environment, so he's not so depressed he's lost hope. She had him tell what he could physically do this week that he couldn't do last week, so he now knows he's improving. It's good to know where you are in your head when going through something like this, so she encouraged him.) And she asked him what his interest wehre -- making dinner for me and his relationship with God.

She told him the hospital provides a variety of ministers, but the closest she got with what we believe was a liberal Lutheran minister, John told her he wouldn't get along with the man. (He'd end up trying to debate him, and he doesn't have the physical energy for a long debate right now. lol) But I interjected, (he told me this on the phone, so I didn't interrupt), that I've offered to contact the church we'd like to be members of several times, but he keeps turning me down. This surprised him.
He doesn't remember me offering. I just asked him yesterday. LOL

In his defense, I think he keeps thinking I want some priest to come for Last Rites. Not exactly that, since we're protestant now, but the old Catholic upbringing does tend to put us in a mindset that's hard to think past. I told him again, he could just use time with a man who agrees with him biblically to talk about God occasionally. I'm a gal, so not quite it, and I don't talk as deeply as he does. (One of his friends that visits is a Christian, but that friend never studied the Bible after Bible college, so it's often John teaching him about Bible things, instead of exchanging ideas.)

Finally! He thinks that's a good idea, so I can call that church. I know they have missionaries in that section of town. (That section of town is called University City, because most of the uni's in our city are all stuffed into that section, and half those uni's are medical schools, so there are professors, doctors, students, and staff constantly developing a Christian community right there. Been doing that for decades, if not centuries.) Finally, John has a way to delve into God in way I can't do for him. Better than an audio Bible.
 
Feb 22, 2016
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Lynn, rather.....
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to insinuate anything by suggesting the audio bible, I just didn't know if he had any other access to God's Word at this time.
In person fellowship around The Word would be really great. Praying for you both, and for the Lord to continue to send the right folks, and healing. God bless. Nu2.
 
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Depleted

Guest
Depleted:
Lynn, rather.....
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to insinuate anything by suggesting the audio bible, I just didn't know if he had any other access to God's Word at this time.
In person fellowship around The Word would be really great. Praying for you both, and for the Lord to continue to send the right folks, and healing. God bless. Nu2.
I really know you were trying to help, and, if I thought hubby could handle a CD player, I'd jump at your offer. I just figured out he's not there yet. He will be, but he isn't yet.
 
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Ariel82

Guest
Do you hold hands and pray with your husband every day? Perhaps read a daily devotional with him. It is great to find a man he can discuss scriptures with, but he still needs your prayers and fellowship even if you are "just" a woman...you are more, you are his wife.
 
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Depleted

Guest
Do you hold hands and pray with your husband every day? Perhaps read a daily devotional with him. It is great to find a man he can discuss scriptures with, but he still needs your prayers and fellowship even if you are "just" a woman...you are more, you are his wife.
He's not up to holding hands for long, but I place my hand in his, (if there isn't a pick or a bandage on his hand from needles, which there often is) or I touch him. 15 days without kissing him back when he had C-diff! Drove me nuts! lol (Especially knowing I can't give it to him, but I feared I'd be kicked out and couldn't see him, if I didn't play by hospital rules.) Our conversations about God are like my conversations on here. God is enough a part of us, that he is a part of the conversation. I have laid hands on him to pray and he knows I pray and have lots of people praying for him.
 

Pilkington

Senior Member
Jan 13, 2015
640
99
28
I am really glad that they had someone come and see how his mental health (depression) was. It is positive he is still interested in what is going on beyond the foor walls and that he hasn't given up hope and can see that he is making progress. Not losing hope is very important in recovering. Medicine is very good at patching people back together but people need to be treated holistically.

Debriding wounds is grim, remove all the necrotic (dead tissue) but it does help healing. My gut feeling is that the ulcer/bed sore will have to be delt with surgically. I am continueing to pray that it will heal naturally.

It is also positive that he is willing to see someone from the Church you would have potentially joined.

I am praying that John and yourself would have the strength to keep ongoing and wouldn't loose hope however long his recovery take. That you would both be able to continue to see little bits of progress however small. Amen
 

Shilo

Senior Member
Aug 31, 2011
1,974
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Praying for peace and strength in your family.
 
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Depleted

Guest
I am really glad that they had someone come and see how his mental health (depression) was. It is positive he is still interested in what is going on beyond the foor walls and that he hasn't given up hope and can see that he is making progress. Not losing hope is very important in recovering. Medicine is very good at patching people back together but people need to be treated holistically.

Debriding wounds is grim, remove all the necrotic (dead tissue) but it does help healing. My gut feeling is that the ulcer/bed sore will have to be delt with surgically. I am continueing to pray that it will heal naturally.

It is also positive that he is willing to see someone from the Church you would have potentially joined.

I am praying that John and yourself would have the strength to keep ongoing and wouldn't loose hope however long his recovery take. That you would both be able to continue to see little bits of progress however small. Amen
Gut feeling not required. He's had surgery twice for it so far. (We thought once was enough until he was taken down again.) I really wish someone would actually tell him what's going on. Surprise surgery is not fun.

He also got his wheelchair on Friday (yesterday), and got out of the room without procedures, surgeries, or tests involved. A mixed bag -- he was happy to get out, but his hips and tush hurt so much he couldn't take the chair for long.

I have been asking since mid December for someone to keep his ears clean. He's hard of hearing and he gets waxy build up quickly making the hearing even worse. Everyone (two hospitals and three units) claims they don't do that, but I know he had his ears cleaned out in that same hospital on a different floor before all that happened. Added to that, no way is he allowed to use Q-tips. So, today I brought in his ear-cleaning kit, and I'm very impressed he did it himself. (Shaky hands made me nervous, but me poking something in his ears would make him even more nervous. lol) What happens to long-term patients without family?

I'm also the only person who washes his hair. Tomorrow the big one! Tomorrow I bring in our Robocut and Shop Vac and we cut his hair for the first time in four months.

(You should see the job I did shaving him. Electric razor, but I have no idea how men shave chins. I thought knees were tough. lol)
 
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Depleted

Guest
I can't take it anymore. I'm walking away from God. So only one prayer request now. I don't pass this on to John. I don't want him as angry as I am. He's got enough to deal with and he needs to get healthy. So pray I can keep this secret from him for a while.
 

davidjohn

Junior Member
Oct 21, 2011
22
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please pray for us we havw been praying for you
 
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Miri

Guest
I can't take it anymore. I'm walking away from God. So only one prayer request now. I don't pass this on to John. I don't want him as angry as I am. He's got enough to deal with and he needs to get healthy. So pray I can keep this secret from him for a while.


Aw Lyn, I think most Christians have expressed this at times, I know I have.

Anger brings its own problems,
so does stress, tiredness, depression. Do you ever feel at times that you are
getting kicked in the teeth despite doing your best and no one notices, or if they
do notice they don't care anyways.

Or those feelings where you are on an endless non stop roundabout of bed,
getting up, dressing, organising, thinking, rushing about, worrying, going to
bed, can't sleep as too much to think about, then getting up for it all to start
again.

I know when I have been at my my lowest, most stressed, when I have felt i
cant do this anymore, that is when God has turned up on the scene big time.
When I have just said God help, as I can't do this any more - that is when
he has shown me "yes you can for when you are weak is when you are at
your strongest because I am with you.

I suppose what I am saying is you plus God is an unbeatable equation.
Hang on in there, turn it all over it God.

Write down all your frustrations on a piece of paper, hold it up in the air if it helps
and say look God, sort this out for my I turn this all over to you.

This may surprise people but it's okay to get angry at God, he has broad shoulders,
it is ok to feel tired and frustrated. It is okay to ask God why.

Read the Psalms and see and hear David's frustration and despair. Vent if you need to
dont hold it all in, then turn it all over to God, don't interfere and watch how he
works things out for you.

---

Lord you know Lynn, you know her situation, her emotions, the difficulties she
is facing, the doubts, the fears. You know the life time of struggles she has gone
through and you have brought her this far on her journey.

Lord I pray you will intervene on Lynn and John's behalf, bring things together
in a way that is only possible through you. I pray healing over John's body, I pray
Lynn will find favour amoung the medical staff and you will cause them to have
compassion and to take control of what ever needs to be done on the practical side.

Show Lynn she does not have to fight, just hand it all over to you. Grant her a time of
rest, goods nights sleep and time out for herself in this battle. Take the dread out of each
day and fill her with your peace. Lord I pray also that you will bring people into her
life to help give Lynn the emotional support she needs and a shoulder to cry on, to
help her carry this load.

Thank you for all you have done and are going to do.

Amen
x
 
D

Depleted

Guest
Aw Lyn, I think most Christians have expressed this at times, I know I have.

Anger brings its own problems,
so does stress, tiredness, depression. Do you ever feel at times that you are
getting kicked in the teeth despite doing your best and no one notices, or if they
do notice they don't care anyways.

Or those feelings where you are on an endless non stop roundabout of bed,
getting up, dressing, organising, thinking, rushing about, worrying, going to
bed, can't sleep as too much to think about, then getting up for it all to start
again.

I know when I have been at my my lowest, most stressed, when I have felt i
cant do this anymore, that is when God has turned up on the scene big time.
When I have just said God help, as I can't do this any more - that is when
he has shown me "yes you can for when you are weak is when you are at
your strongest because I am with you.

I suppose what I am saying is you plus God is an unbeatable equation.
Hang on in there, turn it all over it God.

Write down all your frustrations on a piece of paper, hold it up in the air if it helps
and say look God, sort this out for my I turn this all over to you.

This may surprise people but it's okay to get angry at God, he has broad shoulders,
it is ok to feel tired and frustrated. It is okay to ask God why.

Read the Psalms and see and hear David's frustration and despair. Vent if you need to
dont hold it all in, then turn it all over to God, don't interfere and watch how he
works things out for you.

---

Lord you know Lynn, you know her situation, her emotions, the difficulties she
is facing, the doubts, the fears. You know the life time of struggles she has gone
through and you have brought her this far on her journey.

Lord I pray you will intervene on Lynn and John's behalf, bring things together
in a way that is only possible through you. I pray healing over John's body, I pray
Lynn will find favour amoung the medical staff and you will cause them to have
compassion and to take control of what ever needs to be done on the practical side.

Show Lynn she does not have to fight, just hand it all over to you. Grant her a time of
rest, goods nights sleep and time out for herself in this battle. Take the dread out of each
day and fill her with your peace. Lord I pray also that you will bring people into her
life to help give Lynn the emotional support she needs and a shoulder to cry on, to
help her carry this load.

Thank you for all you have done and are going to do.

Amen
x
No, it's more like this.

God's messages to me.

Ha! Watch this trick. First, I'll yank you out of comfortable life by breaking John's back, but don't worry. I'll get you back on your feet again in a mere three years. Here's a good job for him, and now good jobs for you. Nice and comfort?

Ha! Next trick. Yank John out his nice comfy job to fight for sporadic part time work, one week before making you disabled. And, ta-da! As a flourish, let's make sure, even though your primary doctor knows the cause, she won't tell you for 15 years to protect a colleague from a potential lawsuit. And, let's keep going, because this is fun. Then I'll add a recession, a shortage of jobs in John's field, and voila! That virus I put in him 10-20 years ago has finally spiraled so bad, he gets to think he's dying for half a year, can't figure out why he doesn't have the strength to look for a job, and feels like a total failure because he doesn't have the strength to fix a waste pipe in your house, even if he was a pipefitter. Sure, we both know you don't think he's a failure, but just as long as he does. And then I bring you down so low that you start making plans to live in your car, right before I bring you back from the brink.

Wasn't that fun? Suddenly being able to pay the bills feels good, even though I left you both disabled. John no longer has the strength to study my book, and you can't go to church anymore, but I still love you. Feeling comfortable again? Sure, the highlight of your day is John's dinners, and you work hard at not noticing he's going downhill a little at a time, but I got him free medical care. Sure, it's through the VA, where it takes three months just for an appointment with a doctor, and sure, there are no appointments with doctors, just nurse practioners, but you don't really think they were going to help, even if he did see a doctor did you? They're the last government agency to declare CFS or Fibro as a real condition, and they haven't gone that far yet anyway. You really thought listening to his heart would tell them his vessels are clogged? What were you expecting for free?

Next trick -- two heart attacks, but I'll protect you both from the brink with the smallest of space. And let me give you some surprises along the way. Did I mention how long this way is going to be? Nope, and won't ever let you in on that one.

You pray for no infection, so I gave him pneumonia. Gave him kidney failure too, but I protected you from knowing that, didn't I? Sure, your back is killing you, so here's a surprise that will make you forget your pain -- yes, you swallowed a quarter of your molar. Funny, huh? No time to get it fixed, because his team, (funny word, "team." Sounds like people are working together, but we know they have no idea what anyone else is doing anyway), has come up with promises they won't keep, and promises they never planned to keep and then do things they never told you they were doing. (A quarter of a tooth? Ha! John loses all his before this is done, and you'll never know how many were swallowed when they put in the vent.)

But, hey, those chairs really make your back worse, right?

I'll take care of that. Here, first I'll make sure the humidifier doesn't work. Too easy? Okay, this is better, how about have major problems with your dad and his dementia coincide with big events with John? That will make you forget your back pain. (Well, not really, but at least you won't have time to deal with it.) First, have "his team" promise heart surgery when your oldest brother is taking Dad to court for guardianship, so Dad can freak and call you for support for something you can't support him for. Then have your Dad keep calling you because he's freaking out that his son is trying to force him out of the house, but he has a Christmas tree around the time the surgery really takes place, oh and have everyone lie to you on when it's happening. (You really fell for that noontime, didn't you? Don't worry though. I got him through it.) Then have the hospital pull out John's ventilator and not put in a trach on the day of the formal hearing for your dad. Lots of fun right? Did you forget about your back?

No? Okay, let me up the ante. How about having John supposedly be transferred to the VA again the same day you see your back doctor, and then surprise you by it never did happen. You spent to night in more pain trying to get him transferred. Little did you know some woman saw your sidewalk and thought, "good lawsuit waiting to happen" that very night. At least you know where you were and what you were doing when she didn't cry out for pain and didn't get an ambulance to come and take her to the hospital.

And then my next trick, not only was that hospital claiming you have to pay for John's oral surgery, but that lawsuit came in the mail the same day. And for a kicker, stop the TENS unit from working.

Don't worry, I gave you what you needed to avoid both, just as John's doctor (which really is nurse practioner) wants to schedule his next routine visit in a mere 3 months. Hurry, hurry. Call back. They take three months; you're not supposed to take that long. And, while I'm at it, let me break the car enough that the repairs cost more than the car, but you can't afford a new car either. But it's okay, John Is finally getting out of the ICU, except -- surprise C-diff for his birthday. I know, you wanted Christmas for his birthday, but I didn't. C-diff. Remember that one? Almost killed him twice before, and guaranteed someone in the hospital didn't think it was important to wash their hands after going to the bathroom. But, hey, he's still going to rehab even with C-diff and even though he's losing blood still.

April Fools! And didn't you just love that kicker? He's had that bedsore since the beginning of all this, but now it’s a big problem, so now they have to make him sore by peeling away the layer from the wound. Did you really think it was important for someone to tell him it was Stage IV? Don't worry. I'll keep you occupied. Your new TENS unit dies the day you stay with him to get answers from doctors. I know. More pain, but don't worry. You can make it two more days.

Ha! Fooled you as well as the hospital fooled John by not telling him they were going to cut open his bedsore yet again. You got one night to enjoy that third TENS unit? How much time were you expecting? And really? You thought the nurses would actually remember to feed John and to give him pain meds? Where's the fun in that?

What can I do to you and John next? I bet I have you used to settling repeatedly, don't I? I'm still teaching you to assume none of your hopes will happen.
 
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Ariel82

Guest
John "stood" for 15 minutes yesterday. Not "stood" in the traditional sense like we'd all do, but with some new gadget that looks something like stretcher to keep him vertical. All this sitting and standing stuff is to get him to cough out the junk in his lungs, which, at least I'm imagining, strengthens him and his lungs over the long haul. But he stood! I feel like the mom who's baby went from on his knees to walking, while skipping crawling all together. So proud! (My younger brother was that baby, so I know it's not miraculous, and he's going to have to learn to crawl/sit eventually.)

AND, I rested. Wow! That was miraculous! Last night I was so calm it felt like a typical night for us before all this happened.Thank you, thank you, thank you. (Keep this up, and I might well ask to change the temperature from 16 degrees -- was 12 when I woke up, and it was only supposed to go down to 17 last night -- to back to the 50's and 60's. lol)

But one instant prayer answered, which I hope encourages everyone who prays and prays yet rarely see how God answers.
God has answered your prayers before, perhaps it's time to stop and listen to what He has to say about your situation and to trust Him?
 

Pilkington

Senior Member
Jan 13, 2015
640
99
28
Lynn my heart goes out to you, I wish I could change what is going on it must be so difficult. I totally understand why you are so angry with God and I can here your anger, frustration and tiredness. Whether you want me to or not I am continuing to pray for you and John.

Just wanted to say the type of surgery he has the debriding is not what I meant by surgery I meant reconstructive surgery. I think long term they will have to make a flap of skin and muscle from another area to cover over where the bed sore is. It is not a straight forward operation but it may be the only choice. If this happens it is vital he is moved regularly to help healing. The other thing have they tried low pressure dressings it is just a thought and it may be something they have already tried or it might not even be suitable.
 
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Miri

Guest
Still praying you don't get away that easily.:)

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Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
56,019
26,143
113
Sounds more like medical staff incompetence than anything.
 
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YahshuasChild7

Guest
Praying for him
 
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skylove7

Guest
Hi Lynn....
Was reading how John is doing
He is in my daily prayers, and will continue to be
Amen