Random I know haha. But this is the right place for that right?
My bf has decided to grow his hair long and is at an awkward in-between stage that is bothering him. He apparently tried to do it years ago but didn't take care of it at all and it was so broken and unhealthy that clumps of it would just come out.
Taking some of my basic advice (mostly just washing and conditioning every day with really quality shampoos and making sure he combs it while its still wet) he is having another really good go at it and it's really strong and healthy.
He's gradually accepting that a good result is going to take a little maintenance, and at his own agenda (I'd never pressure him to do something like this that takes such long term effort for my own preference, this is based on his own goal) but, understandably, as a guy, he's trying to find a balance between sacrifice and dignity since he doesn't wanna get all girly forever focusing on his hair and doing fussy things like straightening and blow drying.
Sometimes I blow dry it for him if I happen to be nearby drying my own hair, mostly as a playfully affectionate head massage of sorts, and it comes out looking kind of mop-top and straight which he kind of looks at curiously in the mirror and doesn't seem to mind. But I doubt he's about to start blow drying his own hair regularly himself. He gets up really early for work and usually showers in the afternoon.
What bothers him is the bits at the bottom of his neck that aren't long enough to hold much weight yet and they get fluffy and curly, and a few curly bits around the sides of his head, one tuft one one side in particular that sometimes insists on sticking out.
The weather is thankfully cold right now so maybe during this growth stage he can mostly get away with just wearing a beanie.
But anyway I did mention to him the other day that maybe we could put some relaxer in it and it is supposed to straighten it out and make it fall flat, "permanently" so it wouldn't be a constant maintenance thing.
He seemed intrigued by that idea but this isn't something I can see him bothering to research himself and I don't want to lead him down a bad path, and I don't know much about it. He probably won't see a hairdresser especially if it's pricey, so if we do take this option I'm probably looking at doing it myself.
I hadn't even heard of relaxer before seeing the documentary "hair" by Chris Rock a few years back and from what I remember it was kind of painted in a bad light, but partially with views to black culture and the impact on it of such a person's hair and how it's viewed by society.
I don't have a great attention span for research (due to a partial learning disability) and most of the youtube videos I've found (I learn best Kinaesthetically, and online, youtube is probably the closest I can get) seem to be focused on African or other naturally thick and frizzy hair. My bf is white with dark hair that is mildly wavy at best.
I saw a couple of people on the turorials I've seen mention that you shouldn't use a metal comb, and that you should use the back of the comb - one commented that this is so your hair won't fall out but I'm not sure if they were kidding!
I don't want to do anything that is going to damage his hair after he's made so much effort, and I don't know much either about how long the effects last, whether there are side effects to the scalp etc, or even where to obtain products and which ones are a good idea to try.
Anyone out there know anything about this that could help? Or even a link to a helpful site, especially a tutorial, would be nice.
Thanks!
My bf has decided to grow his hair long and is at an awkward in-between stage that is bothering him. He apparently tried to do it years ago but didn't take care of it at all and it was so broken and unhealthy that clumps of it would just come out.
Taking some of my basic advice (mostly just washing and conditioning every day with really quality shampoos and making sure he combs it while its still wet) he is having another really good go at it and it's really strong and healthy.
He's gradually accepting that a good result is going to take a little maintenance, and at his own agenda (I'd never pressure him to do something like this that takes such long term effort for my own preference, this is based on his own goal) but, understandably, as a guy, he's trying to find a balance between sacrifice and dignity since he doesn't wanna get all girly forever focusing on his hair and doing fussy things like straightening and blow drying.
Sometimes I blow dry it for him if I happen to be nearby drying my own hair, mostly as a playfully affectionate head massage of sorts, and it comes out looking kind of mop-top and straight which he kind of looks at curiously in the mirror and doesn't seem to mind. But I doubt he's about to start blow drying his own hair regularly himself. He gets up really early for work and usually showers in the afternoon.
What bothers him is the bits at the bottom of his neck that aren't long enough to hold much weight yet and they get fluffy and curly, and a few curly bits around the sides of his head, one tuft one one side in particular that sometimes insists on sticking out.
The weather is thankfully cold right now so maybe during this growth stage he can mostly get away with just wearing a beanie.
But anyway I did mention to him the other day that maybe we could put some relaxer in it and it is supposed to straighten it out and make it fall flat, "permanently" so it wouldn't be a constant maintenance thing.
He seemed intrigued by that idea but this isn't something I can see him bothering to research himself and I don't want to lead him down a bad path, and I don't know much about it. He probably won't see a hairdresser especially if it's pricey, so if we do take this option I'm probably looking at doing it myself.
I hadn't even heard of relaxer before seeing the documentary "hair" by Chris Rock a few years back and from what I remember it was kind of painted in a bad light, but partially with views to black culture and the impact on it of such a person's hair and how it's viewed by society.
I don't have a great attention span for research (due to a partial learning disability) and most of the youtube videos I've found (I learn best Kinaesthetically, and online, youtube is probably the closest I can get) seem to be focused on African or other naturally thick and frizzy hair. My bf is white with dark hair that is mildly wavy at best.
I saw a couple of people on the turorials I've seen mention that you shouldn't use a metal comb, and that you should use the back of the comb - one commented that this is so your hair won't fall out but I'm not sure if they were kidding!
I don't want to do anything that is going to damage his hair after he's made so much effort, and I don't know much either about how long the effects last, whether there are side effects to the scalp etc, or even where to obtain products and which ones are a good idea to try.
Anyone out there know anything about this that could help? Or even a link to a helpful site, especially a tutorial, would be nice.
Thanks!