ARE YOU WELL PREPARED

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Williejay1975

New member
#1
Mar 12, 2021
21
9
3
49
Birmingham, AL
#1
Have you ever thought you could pass a test you did not prepare for? That does not make sense right? Well how do you think you can have a good marriage that you did not prepare for?

Most people seem to think it is a natural process. Well 5% of marriages end good. So what? It Naturally Goes Wrong.

If you think it takes having stable jobs and marrying the person who always goes to church and acts nice then you are headed for a big trap.

Are you going to figure it out/let it conquer you like 95% of once married people. And you might say: it is not that important. Well think about all these problems USALLY occurring from bad mate partnerships:
  • Financial Stress that Falls on One from Breakup;
  • Lost Opportunity to Build a Kingdom;

  • Depression in kids;
  • Emptiness;
  • Loneliness when Not in a Good Mate Partnership;

  • Loss of Time you can’t get back, Life does not Start Over;

  • Misery in It;

  • Hate Developed;
  • Division;

  • Bad Communication (sometimes Insolent);

  • Kids following the same patterns because they had not been taught;
All these is important unless you are the type of person who is not concerned about the quality of your mate partnership but the quantity in it.
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#2
Mar 13, 2014
41,323
16,306
113
69
Tennessee
#2
Williejay1975 said:
Have you ever thought you could pass a test you did not prepare for? That does not make sense right? Well how do you think you can have a good marriage that you did not prepare for?

Most people seem to think it is a natural process. Well 5% of marriages end good. So what? It Naturally Goes Wrong.
Click to expand...
End good? As in death? Seems like a natural process.
 
SomeDisciple

SomeDisciple

Well-known member
#7
Jul 4, 2021
1,841
827
113
#7
I feel like telling someone that they should "just get married, and god will take care of everything" is like satan telling Jesus to take a leap of faith off the pinnacle. There's no organized marriage pamphlet in the bible, but I feel like there's plenty that can be gleaned from different parts of scripture that show us that there are plenty of things to consider beforehand.
 
H

HisKid

Banned
#8
Jul 28, 2021
1,226
406
83
#8
Williejay1975 said:
Have you ever thought you could pass a test you did not prepare for? That does not make sense right? Well how do you think you can have a good marriage that you did not prepare for?

Most people seem to think it is a natural process. Well 5% of marriages end good. So what? It Naturally Goes Wrong.

If you think it takes having stable jobs and marrying the person who always goes to church and acts nice then you are headed for a big trap.

Are you going to figure it out/let it conquer you like 95% of once married people. And you might say: it is not that important. Well think about all these problems USALLY occurring from bad mate partnerships:
  • Financial Stress that Falls on One from Breakup;
  • Lost Opportunity to Build a Kingdom;

  • Depression in kids;
  • Emptiness;
  • Loneliness when Not in a Good Mate Partnership;

  • Loss of Time you can’t get back, Life does not Start Over;

  • Misery in It;

  • Hate Developed;
  • Division;

  • Bad Communication (sometimes Insolent);

  • Kids following the same patterns because they had not been taught;
All these is important unless you are the type of person who is not concerned about the quality of your mate partnership but the quantity in it.
Click to expand...
You can't prepare to be in a marriage because nothing is like it. You have to commit to it. If you marry knowing and accepting that you are not going to give up, ever, then the Lord uses that marriage to change both of you. For me, the biggest change in both my husband and I is learning grace in all things.

.
 
H

HisKid

Banned
#10
Jul 28, 2021
1,226
406
83
#10
SomeDisciple said:
I feel like telling someone that they should "just get married, and god will take care of everything" is like satan telling Jesus to take a leap of faith off the pinnacle. There's no organized marriage pamphlet in the bible, but I feel like there's plenty that can be gleaned from different parts of scripture that show us that there are plenty of things to consider beforehand.
Click to expand...
Easy.. wives respect your husbands and husbands love your wives.
 
SomeDisciple

SomeDisciple

Well-known member
#11
Jul 4, 2021
1,841
827
113
#11
HisKid said:
Easy.. wives respect your husbands and husbands love your wives.
Click to expand...
I'd say that's as good a summary of marriage, as "love the lord and thy neighbor" is a summary of the bible. They could both use an expanded explanation.
Hopefully both parties have the same idea of what "love" and "respect" mean.
HisKid said:
You can't prepare to be in a marriage because nothing is like it.
Click to expand...
There's nothing like skydiving either, but there is a way to go into that situation prepared, and you're much better off doing that, than going into it deciding that you will figure it out on the way down- or that God will help you on the way down. Anything that takes commitment is well worth looking into in detail, before going through with it.
 
H

HisKid

Banned
#15
Jul 28, 2021
1,226
406
83
#15
SomeDisciple said:
I'd say that's as good a summary of marriage, as "love the lord and thy neighbor" is a summary of the bible. They could both use an expanded explanation.
Hopefully both parties have the same idea of what "love" and "respect" mean.

There's nothing like skydiving either, but there is a way to go into that situation prepared, and you're much better off doing that, than going into it deciding that you will figure it out on the way down- or that God will help you on the way down. Anything that takes commitment is well worth looking into in detail, before going through with it.
Click to expand...
How do you propose someone "prepare" to be married, exactly?
God helps every day in every way. At least my God does.

.
 
H

HisKid

Banned
#16
Jul 28, 2021
1,226
406
83
#16
tourist said:
A marriage ending good cannot be a good thing.
Click to expand...
I hope I see my husband as my brother in heaven, but if I don't, I'm there to be with the Lord, anyway. We both are. We love each other beyond measure but also are very clear that our first love is the Lord.

.
 
H

HisKid

Banned
#17
Jul 28, 2021
1,226
406
83
#17
SomeDisciple said:
I'd say that's as good a summary of marriage, as "love the lord and thy neighbor" is a summary of the bible. They could both use an expanded explanation.
Hopefully both parties have the same idea of what "love" and "respect" mean.

There's nothing like skydiving either, but there is a way to go into that situation prepared, and you're much better off doing that, than going into it deciding that you will figure it out on the way down- or that God will help you on the way down. Anything that takes commitment is well worth looking into in detail, before going through with it.
Click to expand...
I don't think anyone at all is confused about what respect is and what love is. This is the admonition to the a believer in Scripture. If you and your spouse do not agree what the definition of these terms are, then do a study together.

.
 
H

HisKid

Banned
#18
Jul 28, 2021
1,226
406
83
#18
Williejay1975 said:
Have you ever thought you could pass a test you did not prepare for? That does not make sense right? Well how do you think you can have a good marriage that you did not prepare for?

Most people seem to think it is a natural process. Well 5% of marriages end good. So what? It Naturally Goes Wrong.

If you think it takes having stable jobs and marrying the person who always goes to church and acts nice then you are headed for a big trap.

Are you going to figure it out/let it conquer you like 95% of once married people. And you might say: it is not that important. Well think about all these problems USALLY occurring from bad mate partnerships:
  • Financial Stress that Falls on One from Breakup;
  • Lost Opportunity to Build a Kingdom;

  • Depression in kids;
  • Emptiness;
  • Loneliness when Not in a Good Mate Partnership;

  • Loss of Time you can’t get back, Life does not Start Over;

  • Misery in It;

  • Hate Developed;
  • Division;

  • Bad Communication (sometimes Insolent);

  • Kids following the same patterns because they had not been taught;
All these is important unless you are the type of person who is not concerned about the quality of your mate partnership but the quantity in it.
Click to expand...
Willie, I have a suggestion for you. Do not get married.

.
 
SomeDisciple

SomeDisciple

Well-known member
#19
Jul 4, 2021
1,841
827
113
#19
HisKid said:
How do you propose someone "prepare" to be married, exactly?
God helps every day in every way. At least my God does.
Click to expand...
And sometimes that help is letting people live with the consequences of having done something stupid that was completely avoidable. A close friend of mine had a pseudo-christian girlfriend that liked church, but he didn't find out that she didn't actually believe any of it was real until a while after they were married and she was pregnant.
HisKid said:
I don't think anyone at all is confused about what respect is and what love is.
Click to expand...
Read the forums more, I guess. Because I see plenty of confused people.
HisKid said:
If you and your spouse do not agree what the definition of these terms are, then do a study together.
Click to expand...
I'd say it's probably more effective to do this before you're married, but that's one good answer to your first question.
 
H

HisKid

Banned
#20
Jul 28, 2021
1,226
406
83
#20
SomeDisciple said:
And sometimes that help is letting people live with the consequences of having done something stupid that was completely avoidable. A close friend of mine had a pseudo-christian girlfriend that liked church, but he didn't find out that she didn't actually believe any of it was real until a while after they were married and she was pregnant.

Read the forums more, I guess. Because I see plenty of confused people.

I'd say it's probably more effective to do this before you're married, but that's one good answer to your first question.
Click to expand...
So, your friend didn't know if the woman he fell in love with was actually a believer? He couldn't discern that? It seems your friend was more interested in some hot bootie than a Godly woman. A Godly man will find a Godly woman. Someone who is seeking something else will find it.

I assume you have never been married. Marriage is not anything you can prepare for. You will only understand it when you are in it.

.
 
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