Christian Marriage
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I have been married to the son of a lay preacher. When I was young and perhaps a little naive, I imagined that marrying into such a family would mean finding a warm Christian family around me and a husband with whom I could have the kind of loving marriage I had always prayed for and still pray for.
The reality was something completely different.
I saw things that people did under the cover of religion, followed by asking forgiveness for their sins on Sunday. It made me question what Christian marriage really means.
When a marriage begins on its very first morning with the husband kicking his young bride out of bed and telling her "You are supposed to serve me now because you are my wife " it leaves a young woman wondering: Is this really what marriage is supposed to be?
To me, it is not. Christian marriage should never be about power, fear or treating your spouse as a servat. Christian marriage is a lifelong covenant between a man and a woman with Christ at the center. It is about loving, honoring, forgiving and caring for one another, especially when life is not easy. I think a husband and wife should be a team, praying for each other and helping each other grow closer to God. It should be a safe place where both people can give love and receive love.
The reality was something completely different.
I saw things that people did under the cover of religion, followed by asking forgiveness for their sins on Sunday. It made me question what Christian marriage really means.
When a marriage begins on its very first morning with the husband kicking his young bride out of bed and telling her "You are supposed to serve me now because you are my wife " it leaves a young woman wondering: Is this really what marriage is supposed to be?
To me, it is not. Christian marriage should never be about power, fear or treating your spouse as a servat. Christian marriage is a lifelong covenant between a man and a woman with Christ at the center. It is about loving, honoring, forgiving and caring for one another, especially when life is not easy. I think a husband and wife should be a team, praying for each other and helping each other grow closer to God. It should be a safe place where both people can give love and receive love.
Unfortunately, I see a problem with it.Yes correct. Match all the marriage around my circle
Does the pastor really say "I now pronounce you married?" Or, does he say "I now pronounce you man and wife?"
The wedding makes a couple (hopefully a man and a woman) man and wife, you don't get married there.
Right after God created Adam and Eve, He said, Gen 2:24 "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. Jesus also brought this up during a talk with the pharisees concerning divorce in Mat 19.
In various Bibles, the interpretation of "be joined to" is different in virtually all bibles. And now, this peasant (me) is going to interpret it again. I believe the word is "MARRY." The word marry means to join together. Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and MARRY his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.
Now in the scripture, you see the word "wife." If the word is wife and not woman, that means the wedding already took place. The wedding makes you man and wife.
When the man "marries," "be joined to," "cleave," "whatever word used," (inserts himself) into the woman and breaks the seal (hymen) that God put in the woman, that is when he becomes one flesh with her. And that is when you are truly married.
So, those of you looking to tie the knot, Have a beautiful wedding and a merry marry. LOL
BTW, did you know that Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines? 1000 women he was married to. Oh, and a concubine is a woman he is married to but is not his wife.
I had a wife that was very similar to this. After 6 years of a horrible relationship, I prayed to God and asked Him why my relationship was so horrible. I was husband and married to a divorced woman. This is when God showed me what marriage truly is and that I was committing adultery with her. That ended any "marrying" after that and later on God got me out of that relationship. I haven't been with another woman since.
I suggest you ask God why your marriage is bad and He will answer.
Are you still without understanding? Don't you understand that you become man and wife in the church, and you get married in the bedroom after. You don't get married in a church!!! At least I hope not, that would be awkward.
Too many, including your's truly, believe or believed that the wedding is the marriage when it is not.
I was just clarifying what marriage really is in the hope that it would educate people so they don't end up in sin, like what happened to me.
I agree.
But if you can make the point a little clear?
Are you saying if a person is not biblical single, don't date, marry that person ?
I'm not telling anyone to do anything. Again, I am clarifying what "marry" really means.
Too many say marriage is the relationship. It is not according to God. The relationship is before the wedding and the reason for the wedding and marriage.
You have to two options:
1) Go to the city, get a marriage license. Then have a ceremony where a Pastor/Rabbi/Leader marries you. Both sign the license and return it to the city for filing.
2) Go to the city and get married by the justice of the peace which can be same day. Or if you live in Las Vegas, they literally have drive through chapels for marriages... lol Actually, I saw one in South Florida too.
I also want to make this perfectly clear too, that this makes you legal/human married. There are different rules in different countries and that isn't the standard for God. To God, you are married when both people pledge their life to each other in vows, whenever that happens. You can be married in the eyes of God before you are human/legal married. Human paperwork isn't the standard for what God constitutes as marriage. Specially where some countries don't even have filings for marriages like in some places in Africa.
You misunderstand the idea about divorce. You aren't committing adultery with someone just because they're divorced. It's only adultery if GOD brought that union together, and then they separate, then you marry them. The vast majority of marriages are NOT God brought. David and Bathsheba, Samson and Delilah are great examples. God even told Samson not to marry her. In Ezra 10, God told the people of Israel to divorce their spouses because they married people God didn't want them to be with. So I think you need to re-assess your understanding about divorce.
