L
ladylynn
Guest
I have some experience here! I grew up surrounded by passive-aggressive. It is more like...(you're right that there is a "me against the world" mentality) but it's more like...using your "manners" to get someone. The P-A wants to get someone back for not doing what they want or for doing something they DIDN'T want the person to do. So it's a control thing more than anything else. It's like....you won't agree with me or do what I want, so I'm going to get you back for that in sneaky ways. How sneaky and hard to see those attacks ARE really depends on the skill and intellect of the attacker.
The P-A wants everyones approval, and to be able to cause all to see that they weren't trying to be underhanded or mean, so they devise ways to passively show their aggression. They are great "rule keepers" in that they find a way to attack WITHIN what society deems polite.
It can get quite brutal. I've been there. If I had to narrow down what is going through a P-A's head when they are on the warpath, it would be: I will teach you to never defy my wishes ever again because I will make you so miserable you'll not DARE defy me again.
Strangely too, they are often hoarders in some way...
But it all really comes down to fear. Any control issue is fear based - P-a, hoarding, excessive anxiety, etc.
Duuuh....derail, sorry.
No, those are actually very good observations sis! AND they DO APPLY to the forums for sure!! I can't stand that stuff because as kids my brothers and I were raised in it. You never knew where you stood and were always waiting and fearing for the other shoe to drop.
Fear and control. It's the way the devil works too. But In Christ we do not have to fear and we are not supposed to. We never have to worry about another shoe dropping on us. Plus, it's good to meet people who are not dealing that way as Christians. That is when fellowship is soooooooooooooooo sweet!!!
God heals those old ways in us and gives us as well as teaches us about unconditional love (grace) by giving it to us we are able to give it to others without fear. We love Him because He first loved us.