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Well, some men prefer to be the “hunter” some men rather be chased. It really just depends on the guy, a way to solve this problem is process of elimination. Try ignoring him for a few days, if he actually doesn't care that your ignoring him and couldn't care less, then switch to chasing him. It might confuse him at first but it should work out in the end. That's just what I think…But as for me, i do enjoy the chase 😉😎. I know ya’ll love it 😊
Yet at the same time, that is antiquated and some women may think that overly "bold" due to (at this time) being perceived as "over the top".
I'd get flowers for someone I already knew, and indeed considered sending a bouquet to someone because of a very personal experience...but ended up not, because I couldn't recall their name.
Hit or miss, quite romantic to some and over abundantly old-fashioned to others.
Then again there are some females that contend "who wouldn't want to get flowers?" Perhaps flowers make a statement and since the recipient has no interest in the person it produces anxiety and stress in order to "have" to give a response or something?
I'm not a female, it's hard to say. All I know is everyone is different and interacts differently and I keep an open mind. The Lord warns us well enough of imminent danger if we are walking with him consistently and have a firm grasp on scripture. Personally, it's discouraging when with some females it has to be exactly what they feel comfortable with and if any discomfort occurs then it's a no-go.
Some discomfort is expected. Obviously not breaking any biblical boundaries though.
Getting my stomach tied in knots or having "butterflies" is uncomfortable for me personally due to it so far not leading to anything other than mild pain at rejection, but I have to steel myself to that in some way. I also have to step outside my comfort zone to even give a signal of interest usually...it seems fair that this is reciprocal right?
I'd get flowers for someone I already knew, and indeed considered sending a bouquet to someone because of a very personal experience...but ended up not, because I couldn't recall their name.
Hit or miss, quite romantic to some and over abundantly old-fashioned to others.
Then again there are some females that contend "who wouldn't want to get flowers?" Perhaps flowers make a statement and since the recipient has no interest in the person it produces anxiety and stress in order to "have" to give a response or something?
I'm not a female, it's hard to say. All I know is everyone is different and interacts differently and I keep an open mind. The Lord warns us well enough of imminent danger if we are walking with him consistently and have a firm grasp on scripture. Personally, it's discouraging when with some females it has to be exactly what they feel comfortable with and if any discomfort occurs then it's a no-go.
Some discomfort is expected. Obviously not breaking any biblical boundaries though.
Getting my stomach tied in knots or having "butterflies" is uncomfortable for me personally due to it so far not leading to anything other than mild pain at rejection, but I have to steel myself to that in some way. I also have to step outside my comfort zone to even give a signal of interest usually...it seems fair that this is reciprocal right?
S
So I've been watching The Bachelor this season. I know I know...it's not the best thing for me to watch but it's so dramatic and juicy! 
Anyways, this season there was no sex involved. So I don't think it's been inappropriate. The bachelor is a virgin this time. For those of you not familiar with the show. The bachelor starts off with about 30 women and each week he dates a few of them at a time and picks some that he wants to send home. At the end of the season, he has three women left. He goes on three home town dates. This is where each woman takes him home to meet her family. The last three women were Tayshia, Hannah, and Cassie. Both Tayshia's and Hannah's families were welcoming and gave Colton the bachelor their blessing. Cassie's dad, however, did not. He explicitly said he couldn't because he didn't see how Colton could love his daughter with 2 other women involved.
A little later, Cassie breaks up with Colton herself. This usually doesn't happen. The bachelor is the one who sends the women home. Colton was shocked. He said he loves Cassie the most and he doesn't want to continue the show. So he quit. He left Tayshia and Hannah to try to win over Cassie! What's crazy is that Tayshia and Hannah are both beautiful and sweet women who clearly love Colton dearly. But...he chooses Cassie. Cassie has already broken up with him! I just don't get it. lol Anyways, today we will find out if Cassie accepts Colton and gives him another chance. I gotta say I can't wait for all that to unfold. If ya'll want, I'll let you know what she chooses tonight.
But that's not the topic of this thread...what I'm getting at is this. Do men prefer women who don't show them they like them too much? Cassie has never told Colton that she loves him. He has been shown wondering why she doesn't love him back or why she doesn't say it back.
My grandma used to say "the more love you show a man, the more disrespect you receive from him." I never really understood that until now. Colton couldn't case less about hurting the other two women. All he wants is Cassie who already left him!
And it's not just Colton and Cassie I'm talking about here. Men claim to want women to chase after them, but the few times I have chased guys they react very negatively. Maybe I'm just ugly or something but why is this? There were two men who clearly showed interest in me and when I told them I was into them, they backed off. Why is this? Can certain men not handle women who know what they want? Or do they really like the chase and the mystery of not knowing?
Do you ladies have any stories or points you would like to make regarding this topic? Have you chased a guy before and how did it end up?
Men, do you prefer women to chase you? Have you found that only unattractive women chase you? Do the women you really like not chase you? (This is something my brother has told me.)
I'm not trying to lump all men into a single group. Obviously some men don't want women to chase them and some do. But I would like to see what ya'll have to say about this. Just to have a general idea of what men want. Thanks!
Anyways, this season there was no sex involved. So I don't think it's been inappropriate. The bachelor is a virgin this time. For those of you not familiar with the show. The bachelor starts off with about 30 women and each week he dates a few of them at a time and picks some that he wants to send home. At the end of the season, he has three women left. He goes on three home town dates. This is where each woman takes him home to meet her family. The last three women were Tayshia, Hannah, and Cassie. Both Tayshia's and Hannah's families were welcoming and gave Colton the bachelor their blessing. Cassie's dad, however, did not. He explicitly said he couldn't because he didn't see how Colton could love his daughter with 2 other women involved. A little later, Cassie breaks up with Colton herself. This usually doesn't happen. The bachelor is the one who sends the women home. Colton was shocked. He said he loves Cassie the most and he doesn't want to continue the show. So he quit. He left Tayshia and Hannah to try to win over Cassie!
What's crazy is that Tayshia and Hannah are both beautiful and sweet women who clearly love Colton dearly. But...he chooses Cassie. Cassie has already broken up with him! I just don't get it. lol Anyways, today we will find out if Cassie accepts Colton and gives him another chance. I gotta say I can't wait for all that to unfold. If ya'll want, I'll let you know what she chooses tonight. But that's not the topic of this thread...what I'm getting at is this. Do men prefer women who don't show them they like them too much? Cassie has never told Colton that she loves him. He has been shown wondering why she doesn't love him back or why she doesn't say it back.
My grandma used to say "the more love you show a man, the more disrespect you receive from him." I never really understood that until now. Colton couldn't case less about hurting the other two women. All he wants is Cassie who already left him!
And it's not just Colton and Cassie I'm talking about here. Men claim to want women to chase after them, but the few times I have chased guys they react very negatively. Maybe I'm just ugly or something but why is this? There were two men who clearly showed interest in me and when I told them I was into them, they backed off. Why is this? Can certain men not handle women who know what they want? Or do they really like the chase and the mystery of not knowing?
Do you ladies have any stories or points you would like to make regarding this topic? Have you chased a guy before and how did it end up?
Men, do you prefer women to chase you? Have you found that only unattractive women chase you? Do the women you really like not chase you? (This is something my brother has told me.)
I'm not trying to lump all men into a single group. Obviously some men don't want women to chase them and some do. But I would like to see what ya'll have to say about this. Just to have a general idea of what men want. Thanks!
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I agree age and culture play a factor in what the rules of engagement are. I think any gift giving before a date would be weird. By observing my adult children, I would say, “Slide in a DM.” Follow her social media and see if she accepts and follows back. When I was young usually there was a connection, like school or work, or friend of a friend. There would be interaction. You could see if she laughed at your jokes, smiled in your direction and dressed attractively to get your attention. You would do the same. You would get enough hints as to whether to take her on a date or not. Even at clubs you would get enough body language to approach. Today, social media.....good luck!
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How does a bouquet of flowers progress? On my end that seems very forward lol. It just seems so "noticeable" to almost come across as attention seeking. Which I suppose is the point, but barring flowers?
Not to say I don't like flowers myself, but usually I don't have them just for beauty and smell...Lavender for instance is quite useful
Not to say I don't like flowers myself, but usually I don't have them just for beauty and smell...Lavender for instance is quite useful
@Hungry I've tried social media. Technically I guess that's what this is, but not quite the same since I don't think I've met any of you in person (possible though). Usually on social media I just get "read 6:02" and no response, or a simple "like" but that's about it. I've been met with rejection more often to the point where I stopped seeing it as an option unless someone specifically added me for courting and it was mutual. That has yet to happen.
My thought when I was in undergrad was that social media was the least intrusive thing and should make someone the most comfortable due to the screen/distance barrier...but I suppose not. Penpalling is a bit old-fashioned for most, but I would certainly be open to engage that way though, to me that's romantic.
but then perhaps the problem is giving out your address to people. You can use a P.O box here in the U.S and it would require an official warrant to figure out the sender's home address so I think that's pretty safe.
My thought when I was in undergrad was that social media was the least intrusive thing and should make someone the most comfortable due to the screen/distance barrier...but I suppose not. Penpalling is a bit old-fashioned for most, but I would certainly be open to engage that way though, to me that's romantic.
but then perhaps the problem is giving out your address to people. You can use a P.O box here in the U.S and it would require an official warrant to figure out the sender's home address so I think that's pretty safe.
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I can only speak of how I see my kids interact with people. They aren’t seeking strangers. When they meet someone they trade social media info. This gives insight into personality. You prefer some dude you met a couple days ago just randomly sends you flowers? My daughter got flowers from her boyfriend maybe twice. They were already together.
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How does a bouquet of flowers progress? On my end that seems very forward lol. It just seems so "noticeable" to almost come across as attention seeking. Which I suppose is the point, but barring flowers?
Not to say I don't like flowers myself, but usually I don't have them just for beauty and smell...Lavender for instance is quite useful
Not to say I don't like flowers myself, but usually I don't have them just for beauty and smell...Lavender for instance is quite useful
You dont know the langauge of flowers? do some research man. They arent just for weddings and funerals.
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