FOR SINGLES ONLY

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how often do you desire/think about having a gf/bf?

  • every waking moment

    Votes: 7 11.5%

  • every now and then

    Votes: 35 57.4%

  • rarely

    Votes: 13 21.3%

  • i dont want a bf/gf

    Votes: 6 9.8%
  • Total voters
    61
arwen83 said:
My petition:

Dear God,

There are some of us here on this website, that would really like it if we had someone special in our lives. That we could meet our future husband or wife in the near future. I pray that you hear our prayers, that the desires of our hearts would be fulfilled according to Your will.

Amen
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Amen. :)
 
arwen83 said:
I know some women refuse to date guys younger than them. I don't think age, in terms of guys younger than me, is a major factor for me. But it all depends, I had two fellas I was kinda seeing (not at the same time :p) that were 22 and 21, but I think around that age guys don't really know what they want. They start to experience feelings, get scared and run in the other direction. At least thats been my experience. Maturity and life experience is important as well.
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LOL - what you say is incredibly accurate. :( Or at least is my experience with myself.

You have some real wisdom in you Seoul. :)
 
Man this is exactly the same thing that runs through my mind but I try to fight it because it feels like I'm too focused on pleasing myself rather than pleasing God. Sometimes it really gets to me and I get depressed, but like Ugly said you have to fight those thoughts and don't let them consume you. We just have to put our trust in the Lord and try not to worry about the things we have and don't have in this life. I'll be praying for you and everyone else on Christian Chat.
 
Everytime you feel yourself getting down about being single, give it to Jesus. Tell him how you feel about being single, tell him how yourfeeling at that point, an then tell him to please take those feelings away. Ask him to give you something to focus on other than your singleness.

And maybe you can find something to do while your praying about this. Sometimes keeping your hands busy helps.
 
Last night I was actually reading about how this girl wrote a book called : Getting Married: What To Do To Help It Happen ( something like that).

It's a Christian author basically talking about the desire of a single Christian's heart to get married. She basically said that if it's your desire to get married and you feel like that's the desire God has placed in your heart...then go boldly before God asking Him in prayer and thanking Him for this desire and your future spouse one day.

" Lord , you created me. And I believe you created me for marriage. I don't know the timeline, but I'm asking you to fulfill my desire to be married." - The prayer she used to prayer when she desired to get married.------ If that's what you're looking for.

Hope this helped :)
 
arwen83 said:
Well the way I figure, is I have to meet a guy, if we both decide that we love each other and take it to the next level, we get married, then have a child/children. I'm 29, without a boyfriend and no prospects. The chances of all this happening by 35 is slim. The older a woman gets, the higher the chance of miscarriage or the child having birth defects. So it gets me feeling panicky. I've just made myself depressed lol.

But scripture says, do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. I am seriously considering going around and getting other peoples signatures on my petition! God's gotta get moving if there are like 20 people on my list that believe I should meet my husband soon (I say that jokingly...sort of)
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Hey girly if God desired you to get married and have children ( without miscarrying) then that would happen for you :) God is ever so faithful --- I know you already know that :)
 
I see that many of the responders here are YOUNG. To the women- I am wondering have you carefully considered is it that you are just wanting to be MARRIED as in... is the status of being married what you desire? or is it the loneliness to not have someone special to "love" you? I have observed these two things are often the focus in many women. So I would suggest you payerfully consider that, if self-examination convicts you not, then I would encourage you to focus on cultivating skills that would develop you into the Help-meet a Godly man SHOULD be searching for and to pray for your future mate while you remain pure of mind and body until he discovers you. And to seek THe lord in considering what sort of qualities you need to see demonstrated by that fella so you recognize him when he comes courting. Also it is okay if you pray the Lord give him a GPS for Christmas <wink>. TO the men, I wonder about those of you who feel like you are getting "OLD" and haven't found a wife yet because there are PLENTY of women available. The very first ministerial "JOB" for christian adults is to unite in marriage and build a family. Since God clearly instructs that Man is the head... that means the initiator/leader... how is it that some of you are whining about not having a wife? It is your job to go out and find her, she is a prize to be won. IF your focus is finding the right one, I might suggest you focus on being the right one. A man who wants to be married and carries on for years because he can't find the right one... in MOST cases is either not putting forth earnest effort to look for and court a woman or has centered his focus on seeking for the wrong reasons. Being the God ordained leaders... its your JOB to initiate and pursue a woman not wait for one to fall in your lap... you must get out there and search, which will mean rejection sometimes, say PRAISE GOD, she wasn't the one and continue your search. Let me make it clear... I am not suggesting you chase around like a hound dog... I am assuming I am speaking to young christian men who are serious about selecting a wife. Amid your personal preferences for being attracted to a woman you should have SOME particular traits you seek... including a woman who expects you to court her and work at it, in a sincere way ... not one who just "falls" Into a relationship with you.
Lastly, I would like to point to the TREND notice of "over-honoring" singleness... while being single does not make any believer LESS THAN... as mentioned previously, MARRIAGE was created by GOD before the Church was instituted and is MOST believers FIRST adult and often ONLY ministry before God. THis ministry is being subverted by christian divorce statistics that rival the unbeleivers as well as an astonishing rise in single adults across the board. Scripture is very clear that FEW/SOME people are eunuchs before the Lord, therefore it is worth careful consideration if you are a single male who desires to be married but not actively enrolling yourself in community for that to happen... and therefor walking in disobedience. It is not the ladies job to approach YOU, it is her job to respond to your approach.
 
BarlyGurl said:
I see that many of the responders here are YOUNG. To the women- I am wondering have you carefully considered is it that you are just wanting to be MARRIED as in... is the status of being married what you desire? or is it the loneliness to not have someone special to "love" you? I have observed these two things are often the focus in many women. So I would suggest you payerfully consider that, if self-examination convicts you not, then I would encourage you to focus on cultivating skills that would develop you into the Help-meet a Godly man SHOULD be searching for and to pray for your future mate while you remain pure of mind and body until he discovers you. And to seek THe lord in considering what sort of qualities you need to see demonstrated by that fella so you recognize him when he comes courting. Also it is okay if you pray the Lord give him a GPS for Christmas <wink>. TO the men, I wonder about those of you who feel like you are getting "OLD" and haven't found a wife yet because there are PLENTY of women available. The very first ministerial "JOB" for christian adults is to unite in marriage and build a family. Since God clearly instructs that Man is the head... that means the initiator/leader... how is it that some of you are whining about not having a wife? It is your job to go out and find her, she is a prize to be won. IF your focus is finding the right one, I might suggest you focus on being the right one. A man who wants to be married and carries on for years because he can't find the right one... in MOST cases is either not putting forth earnest effort to look for and court a woman or has centered his focus on seeking for the wrong reasons. Being the God ordained leaders... its your JOB to initiate and pursue a woman not wait for one to fall in your lap... you must get out there and search, which will mean rejection sometimes, say PRAISE GOD, she wasn't the one and continue your search. Let me make it clear... I am not suggesting you chase around like a hound dog... I am assuming I am speaking to young christian men who are serious about selecting a wife. Amid your personal preferences for being attracted to a woman you should have SOME particular traits you seek... including a woman who expects you to court her and work at it, in a sincere way ... not one who just "falls" Into a relationship with you.
Lastly, I would like to point to the TREND notice of "over-honoring" singleness... while being single does not make any believer LESS THAN... as mentioned previously, MARRIAGE was created by GOD before the Church was instituted and is MOST believers FIRST adult and often ONLY ministry before God. THis ministry is being subverted by christian divorce statistics that rival the unbeleivers as well as an astonishing rise in single adults across the board. Scripture is very clear that FEW/SOME people are eunuchs before the Lord, therefore it is worth careful consideration if you are a single male who desires to be married but not actively enrolling yourself in community for that to happen... and therefor walking in disobedience. It is not the ladies job to approach YOU, it is her job to respond to your approach.
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I don't think that age has anything to do with wanting the things of God. I believe in all honesty we just really desire those things...whatever those " things" are....And God doesn't shun us for thinking on those things.

I'm starting to learn now, however, is to not obsess over these desires and put them into God's hands.

We just need to trust and know that God understands the desires of our hearts.

In a woman's life ( to most women), our master status is : Wife and Mother.....and the list goes on.

It's just simply how God made women.... ultimately ( even if some of us don't want to get married). We still want to nurture something...right?

And as for the men, I do agree that some if not most men...have been slacking in that area of pursuing women.
 
Today I was having a moment with God. I remembered all the times I tried to make my own dreams and desires happen. Brokenness comes from impatience and I am so thankful God has plans with our broken peices.

My life is definitely not where I dreamed it would be, but there is so much about it I see God's hand prints on.

Being Single has helped me see I serve One Master and I have a huge job each day. Live Heartily unto the Lord -- that was my word this year.

I see where this post came from, everyone dreams of the picture perfect marriage and beautiful family. God didn't give that to you -- Because He wants you to grow and not be content on your dreams.

I would love a man who loves and serves God, but with that comes much responsibility.

I will never settle again and this post reminds me that God has a beautiful live for me Today.

Live it Up and don't let Satan fill your head with lies. You are fearfully and Wonderfully made
 
I dont think every single moment but its close, lol....so I voted for that.....I range from thoughts of my ex's to what my future husband will be like....to my life sucks, lol, but it dosent, cause Im blessed!
 
hhhlga89 said:
I have been struggling alot with desiring God first and foremost and being content with Him. I want to know if there is anyone out there (or how much there are) who feel the same way I do. I just turned 23 and the only thing I'm able to think about is my single life and how much I want a gf. I actually know I'm not alone, but does anyone else struggle with desiring God more?
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I know exactly how you feel! I get sad when I see couples everywhere...
 
I want a boyfriend. I'm twenty-three, and I've never had a boyfriend before. It's rather depressing.
 
In my early 20's I desired a girlfriend regularly. Fast forward to now, I've still never had one but I'm more content with who I am in Christ. Yes, I still have the desire for a girlfriend but it's generally far at the back of my mind.
 
well, im a male, 25, single, i live in MI, message me or something
 
For some reason this post was at the top of the forum on my screen, yet the newest post is 2 weeks old. Weird.

I'll go ahead and respond anyway. :D

I desire to be a wife/mom someday. I really want to be a stay at home mom, for at least a while. However, up until last August, my desire to get married was focused on the fact that I thought that marriage would make me feel validated. It would show the world that I was, in fact, capable of being loved. To prove that I was worth it. But last August, God brought this to my attention. He showed me that that is not what marriage was about, and that all of those feelings were tied to my lack of a healthy view of myself and of Christ. It was really incredible, but I now (through the gracious truth of God) desire to get married to show the world a godly, loving couple. To show others (along with my future husband and I) what Christ's love for the church looks like. To work for God's kingdom with my husband beside me. I actually wrote a whole, in depth, note on it on Facebook in hopes that it would reach out to others the way it changed me. Many felt the same way and I was thankful that God gave me the words to speak to those who had been struggling with the same thing.

Do I still desire a husband? Yes. Do I think about it? Yes, relatively often. But it has started to be less of a panging, hopeless feeling and more of a patience and desiring God more, feeling.

That's probably more in depth than most care to know and it may not make sense. ;) But it was a bit in response to BarlyGurl's post on why us young women want to get married.

ETA: I will say, though, that that desire was really strong a year or two ago. Probably because it was "engagement season" apparently, because 12 people that I knew got engaged within a 6 month time span. 12!
 
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I read that an educated estimate of 70,000 thoughts per day is average for a person so thoughts even a few are not much but it is the heart and soul that are greater that a few thoughts, Hope defered makes the heart sick but when the desire comes it is a tree of life, even if the Lord allowed me to become sick by my hope being defered It is He that is my souls tree of eternal Life Light and love with joy and then he opens His hand and satisfies the desire of every living thing.
 
Agape, that makes little sense and had nothing to do with the subject of the thread.

Rachel, excellent post, mate! It's brilliant that you've got to the stage where you can rely on God for your every need and find validation in him. That's pretty rare in this day and age. On another note, I've also noticed old threads showing up as recent threads. Very odd!
 
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