Help with repentance.

[2ndTimothyGroup]

Wow! That was so powerful. Thank you. I've been married twice. Both husbands were unfaithful to me. I didn't think I'd get into another relationship, but I was looking for a friend because I was lonely, and this guy who seemed so perfect, except for not being a Christian (and how can I even call that perfect?), drew me in. And I'm sure you've seen my other posts, that he broke up with me the day after New Year's because his ex-wife wanted him back. I've been so devastated. But what it makes me worry about is that I will get into another relationship when I just really need to focus on God and my family. Anyhow, your words are encouraging. I am still struggling with the pain of the breakup, but I appreciate you helping me get in the right mind. I'm working on it.
Raceboy, it's great that you're reaching out and praying about this. I wish with all my heart that I'd waited for the right man to be my husband. If you do decide on marriage, make sure to find someone who's equally yoked. God gave us good guidelines. They can save you from a lot of pain. I'm joining you in prayer. God bless!

Awww . . . I'm sorry to hear that this has happened to you. And as far as falling for someone that wasn't a Christian . . . I get it. We just don't want to hurt anymore, and even when non-Christians present themselves in a certain way, it somehow seems like we can work around it. In the end, we're just trying to feel better in this world. Again, I tooootally get it.

I'm glad that my experiences and words have found a way to your heart. I know that it is hard, but if you can find a way to completely dedicate yourself to God, that would always be best. If I were you, I'd get a timeline, chronological reading plan of the entire Bible and read it as the actual story that it is. Once you read the Bible as if it were a regular "book," I think that you'll be hooked and want to read it all over again . . . the next time maybe twice as fast. There are so many stories that when you read them in the order that they actually took place, you become hooked . . . like it's the most amazing and dramatic story ever told. I'll never forget my first read through it (only a few years ago) and while I loved it, I was bummed that once I finished the Old Testament, I could never go back and experience again as I did the first read through. It was so exciting to NOT know what was going to happen on the next page. Once you get into the reign of the kinds, gosh, the stories come and go so fast . . . and they're so extreme! More than anything, though, if you recognize that we're supposed to be focusing on the Power of God, it will become even more meaningful. He often says, "Then they will know that I am the Lord their God!" Power . . . Power . . . Power. And that Power is real! That God Truly does exist. I've felt it.

Much respect and sympathy for your stuggles.

2TG

 

[tourist]

Wow! That was so powerful. Thank you. I've been married twice. Both husbands were unfaithful to me. I didn't think I'd get into another relationship, but I was looking for a friend because I was lonely, and this guy who seemed so perfect, except for not being a Christian (and how can I even call that perfect?), drew me in. And I'm sure you've seen my other posts, that he broke up with me the day after New Year's because his ex-wife wanted him back. I've been so devastated. But what it makes me worry about is that i will get into another relationship when I just really need to focus on God and my family. Anyhow, your words are encouraging. I am still struggling with the pain of the breakup, but I appreciate you helping me get in the right mind. I'm working on it.
Raceboy, it's great that you're reaching out and praying about this. I wish with all my heart that I'd waited for the right man to be my husband. If you do decide on marriage, make sure to find someone who's equally yoked. God gave us good guidelines. They can save you from a lot of pain. I'm joining you in prayer. God bless!

I'm on wife #3 myself.

First marriage was a disaster, the X cheated on me, was verbally and physically abusive, never did any housework even though she was a stay-at-home mom. Treated me like crap. The marriage ended mercifully in 1984 after 6 1/2 years.

After that, I was alone and celibate for 18 years until I remarried. My second wife was a sweetheart but had many serious health issues and was in constant pain and in need of care. I knew this going in. Did my best to provide for her and take care of her. She died at the young age of 59 in 2014 from a pulmonary embolism. The marriage lasted 11 years 2 months exactly.

My current (and last wife) is a sweetheart too and thank God she has no serious health issues but even if she did, I would still take care of her. We recently celebrated our 7th anniversary. Very spiritual woman and is an excellent wife and my best friend in life. Very interesting and often amusing.

 

[tourist]

Sorry!

Hi bro. Doctor told to do c section on March 2-4th , and take out baby. You can pray for wife's delivery and

I will pray for this my friend.

 

[EternalFire]

Well thanks for letting me know that I'm doomed and heading straight for hellfire.

The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the Kingdom of God (Galatians 5:19-21).

 

[2ndTimothyGroup]

If I might add, what Eternalfire seems to be saying is that we cannot "live" like this in a continual state. We are to have one master, and it is to be our Lord . . . not our phallus. We need to think about God more than our own desires.

Lastly, we are not to possess any pattern of sin, thus, not "living" in a continual practice of any one, single sin. For, even David committed adultery and apparent murder, but he did not make a practice of such things.

1 John 3:8-10 NLT - "But when people keep on sinning, it shows that they belong to the devil, who has been sinning since the beginning. But the Son of God came to destroy the works of the devil. Those who have been born into God's family do not make a practice of sinning, because God's life is in them. So they can't keep on sinning, because they are children of God. So now we can tell who are children of God and who are children of the devil. Anyone who does not live righteously and does not love other believers does not belong to God."

 

[RaceBoy]

The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the Kingdom of God (Galatians 5:19-21).

The more I keep reading about sexual sin, the more I feel like I'm screwed. I still feel like I can depend upon Jesus so I'm not really worried, But When I read the bible on sins I feel like a complete failure (not just sexual sin, but in general). I can't match the faith of my mom, I occasionally use profanity (in my mind mostly, I wouldn't say it out loud very often), and i masturbate almost daily. I am in a lot of trouble.

 

[2ndTimothyGroup]

The more I keep reading about sexual sin, the more I feel like I'm screwed. I still feel like I can depend upon Jesus so I'm not really worried, But When I read the bible on sins I feel like a complete failure (not just sexual sin, but in general). I can't match the faith of my mom, I occasionally use profanity (in my mind mostly, I wouldn't say it out loud very often), and i masturbate almost daily. I am in a lot of trouble.

This is why I scream SPIRITUAL CIRCUMCISION! If your heart has been relieved of the Sinful Nature, then you have an advocate for you when you DO sin. But, what's important, here, is that you beg the Lord for His Holy Operation of Faith upon your heart SO THAT the Lord will become your Holy Advocate.

[1Jo 2:1 NLT] "My dear children, I am writing this to you so that you will not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate who pleads our case before the Father. He is Jesus Christ, the one who is truly righteous."

 

[Runningman]

@RaceBoy Praying for you. I will share some thoughts that hopefully help somehow.

The Bible doesn't clearly identify masturbation as something that is sexually immoral. People back in Biblical times were masturbating, too, so if it was a problem it seems like the apostles would have gotten really specific about it like they got specific about other things. Fornication, adultery, prostitution, and homosexuality are clearly identified as sexually immoral in the Bible, but masturbation isn't.

Masturbation might fall into the "lusts of the flesh" or "lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God" categories, but, again, masturbation isn't listed as a specific love of pleasure, neither is eating, scratching an itch, or anything else that feels good. Strictly from a Biblical perspective, it seems like a gray area to me. Now that's just the Bible.

I believe the Holy Spirit has convicted me that masturbation is unhealthy and unChristian, but it isn't the worst possible thing. I think God realizes that people think it feels good and that we enjoy it, but that doesn't make it right, nor is there reason to believe we have fallen from grace for masturbating. More importantly, what I have been led to believe, is it's a test of self-control that everyone needs to go through. I also have reason to believe it's selfish because it's obviously a pursuit of self-gratification. We should be seeking the things of God. If you get married then you will have a legitimate outlet for that.

 

[2ndTimothyGroup]

That's a solid post from Runningman.

I do want to add the reality of what we're doing, however. Any physically circumcised man is absolutely "playing" with the Covenant of God that represents Christ's Holy Operation of Faith . . . the cutting away of the Sinful Nature. Everyone ought to think about what he's doing with that "Covenant" when he's "doing it."

Realize that mark of the Holy Covenant and then think about the stories of bestiality, or the male prostitute shrines that king Josiah cleared out of the Temple, or the woman that was raped to death by the hoard of Benjamites. All of these acts were done with the Covenant of the Lord leading the way. Imagine that, feces covering that Holy Covenant of the Lord. Imagine that, taking the Holy Covenant and thrusting it into animals is a sexual and lustful way, or, using that Covenant as a tool to literally murder. It is just unbelievable!!

The Holy Mark of the Covenant is not a play-thing. It is serious, for it represents being made right with the Lord. When we abuse that Covenant physically, it shows and proves that we not only do not understand what our Bible is about, but it just may very well prove that we are not saved. So, if we abuse that Covenant, we'd at least better realize what we're doing and that we're doing it before the Lord. For, the Lord sees all and knows all . . . whether it be light or dark.

 

[EternalFire]

The more I keep reading about sexual sin, the more I feel like I'm screwed. I still feel like I can depend upon Jesus so I'm not really worried, But When I read the bible on sins I feel like a complete failure (not just sexual sin, but in general). I can't match the faith of my mom, I occasionally use profanity (in my mind mostly, I wouldn't say it out loud very often), and i masturbate almost daily. I am in a lot of trouble.

See that no one is sexually immoral, or is godless like Esau, who for a single meal sold his inheritance rights as the oldest son. Afterward, as you know, when he wanted to inherit this blessing, he was rejected. Even though he sought the blessing with tears, he could not change what he had done (Hebrews 12:16-17).

 

[2ndTimothyGroup]

Regarding Esau, @RaceBoy, God hated him.

[Mal 1:3 NKJV] "But Esau I have hated, And laid waste his mountains and his heritage For the jackals of the wilderness."

Esau's heart was never Spiritually Circumcised. His brother, Jacob, however, was Spirit-led, and in fact, he is in the Geneology of the Vine of Christ. All who are in the Vine of Christ have received the Spiritual Circumcision of Christ . . . the cutting away of the Sinful Nature.

I'm telling you . . . the vast majority of Scripture hinges upon the Circumcision of Christ, hence, MEMORIZE Colossians 2:9-15!

 

[KALYNA18]

Believing in God's words for you, let every man be a liar but God is not a man that he would lie. Jesus told the 10 leopard's to go wash in a certain place. Hey as they were going on the road, they were healed. Only one went back to say thank you. bible verse, Your on the right road, here in the prayer room, and though it seems OH !! where is God, Help!! as your believing and making a U Turn, say till death do us part, to that ugly thing, I say goodby to the flesh and lusts, "I am crucified with Christ and yet neither I that liveth but Christ that liveth in me. bv Your on your way, don't forget to Thank the Savior. Say I have died to the old nature, till death do we part.

 

[RaceBoy]

Thanks everyone. I've prayed and no longer feel the desire of sexual sin. I'm gonna see how long I can (hopefully) last without sinning.

 

[EternalFire]

Thanks everyone. I've prayed and no longer feel the desire of sexual sin. I'm gonna see how long I can (hopefully) last without sinning.

I pray that you put a plan in place to support your fight against sinning sexually. You may find the material at the link below helpful on your journey.

https://www.mastermyhabits.com/

 

[RaceBoy]

Update. Not much has changed, still masturbate almost daily and feeling unhappy about being single.

 

[CS1]

Update. Not much has changed, still masturbate almost daily and feeling unhappy about being single.

the sad thing is you are not wanting to stop because clearly you are bound by sexual Idolatry. Feelings are deceiving. I am shocked by your post it is trollish.

 

[The_Unnamed_Servent]

I used to be just like you. I figured that if I just continued into a relationship my habits would just translate into intimacy. And that the guilt/shame/defeat would be a thing of the past. The long and short of it was another deception from the Devil. From experience, you'll learn that the "easy way out" is usually another trap waiting to be sprung. Intimacy with others became a problem when I was used to playing solo (Satan tends to stack on misery)... Took a while to overcome this and unless you've changed course somewhat it sounds like you're on the same path my friend (and I wouldn't recommend it).

What ultimately helped me was kick the habit was controlling my biological needs through daily fasting. (I did an "eat whatever you want" from 6pm-10pm daily diet w/ water only). I noticed that not only did I lose a ton of weight but I gained major command over my flesh. Things like appetite/lust were well under my control, and morning temptations were none existent. I also found a ton of downtime which I used to get closer to God by reading His word/prayer.

There are plenty of Biblical examples to follow but I'm only going to point to Jesus and His 40 days in the wilderness. After conquering worldly temptations, He emerged full of the Holy Spirit and Power. Fasting is like manifesting the struggle between your physical desires (flesh) & spiritual needs (God). You decide which is more important to you.

Lots of texts on fasting but for you, I'd recommend checking out: (James 4:1-10 TLB)

....6 But he gives us more and more strength to stand against all such evil longings. As the Scripture says, God gives strength to the humble but sets Himself against the proud and haughty. 7 So give yourselves humbly to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. 8 And when you draw close to God, God will draw close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and let your hearts be filled with God alone to make them pure and true to him. 9 Let there be tears for the wrong things you have done. Let there be sorrow and sincere grief. Let there be sadness instead of laughter, and gloom instead of joy. 10 Then when you realize your worthlessness before the Lord, he will lift you up, encourage and help you.

More important than actual humility is the proper type of repentance. The Lord will not be fooled by the counterfeit. If your heart isn't truly in this, and you are not utterly "broken" by this strife with sin; then you're wasting your time.

But, if you are serious about this issue then leave no stone unturned.

 

[RaceBoy]

the sad thing is you are not wanting to stop because clearly you are bound by sexual Idolatry. Feelings are deceiving. I am shocked by your post it is trollish.

Definitely not trolling, but yeah I know I'm stuck in a cycle that has to break. I can overcome for a few days (longest was a week without masturbation) but I just go right back to it when I know I'm still single and won't get married anytime soon.

 

[RaceBoy]

Honestly guys I don't really want to masturbate. I just don't know what else will satisfy my desire for intimacy when I've been stuck in my parents house for most of my life. I'm not capable of getting married at this time so I'm using this as a way to cope with being unhappy with my current situation. I know it may not seem like I want to stop but really I do. I just can't find a way to live without sexual pleasure while being single in a world where it's getting harder to live. Masturbation is the only thing keeping me calm and somewhat happy when I'm otherwise unhappy living with my parents.

 

[CS1]

Honestly guys I don't really want to masturbate. I just don't know what else will satisfy my desire for intimacy when I've been stuck in my parents house for most of my life. I'm not capable of getting married at this time so I'm using this as a way to cope with being unhappy with my current situation. I know it may not seem like I want to stop but really I do. I just can't find a way to live without sexual pleasure while being single in a world where it's getting harder to live. Masturbation is the only thing keeping me calm and somewhat happy when I'm otherwise unhappy living with my parents.

You LACK SELF-CONTROL, and the reason why you do it is because you like it. Men make excuses for sexual sin or blame others for their own inability to have self-control. The first step to getting the victory in this is:

1. admit you are not wanting to stop
2. repent and ask God to help you and to set you free
3. separate yourself from Pornography I.E. music, movies, the net, and books
4. have someone check your phone too.
5. Pray and get into the word.
6. Work, and don't have idle time which leads to destruction.

Loneliness is an excuse. IF you make sex the foundation of your relationship, you will still be unsatisfied Because the flesh never going to be satisfied. And you will take this into your relationship because you have not dealt with the heat of the issue in your heart.

it is no different than homosexuality, drunkness, or drugs. You have not to surrender that part of your life to the Lord and have no intentions of doing so. That speaks volumes of your relationship and frankly the liberty of how you are so willing to throw it out.

many will say they have sexual additions without being so graphic. Yet those who have no shame are not even apprehensive with the understanding those of the opposite sex can see this. It is disrespecting yourself. You are immature, and you need to put your sexual drive into work for the kingdom of God. Now stand up, shake yourself off and demonstrate you are a man of God and have self-control. News flesh guy women don't like pity parties.