Homosexuality and Transgenderism (struggling)

[ciicii]

I am feeling so discouraged, I just got off of a call with one of my friends. who has said he has decided to accept himself and go back to homosexuality and is on tinder, but is still a believer in Christ. He got a bit defensive about it when I said that if you believe in God then why would you disobey him. And he said Christian's don't understand because he never made the choice to be Gay and every one is saying that he has made a choice when he was just born that way.

I told him that as someone who has struggled with same sex attraction out of serious brokenness and mild body dysmorphia that would be considered transgenderism. I do understand. But what I understood was that those feelings are off fallen flesh and are not a choice he was 'born that way' (in fallen flesh), but the sin in homosexuality and transgenderism is choosing to indulge in those fleshly desires instead of denying the flesh and hanging on to truth and running from sexual immorality.

My ex also decided that he was 'born this way' after less than a year of very poor council and just choosing comfort over vows pretty much. But the common thing in both my husband and my friend is that neither of them truly came to God. neither of them truly changed when they said they believe in God and want a relationship with Him.

So maybe I shouldn't be surprised? I am not sure, but what are your thoughts on this?

Like my friend still wants to be friends, he is still going to church but he just wants to practice homosexuality too and in my mind that makes no sense, choosing feelings over truth. And when I struggled God's truth was the line that helped me fight it. I still struggle at times but it has always been easy to deny and ignore after so many years of doing it so why can't other do the same and serve God.

It truly just devastates me but no one really talks about it so yeah - opinions please.

 

[GabrielMarques]

I am feeling so discouraged, I just got off of a call with one of my friends. who has said he has decided to accept himself and go back to homosexuality and is on tinder, but is still a believer in Christ. He got a bit defensive about it when I said that if you believe in God then why would you disobey him. And he said Christian's don't understand because he never made the choice to be Gay and every one is saying that he has made a choice when he was just born that way.

I told him that as someone who has struggled with same sex attraction out of serious brokenness and mild body dysmorphia that would be considered transgenderism. I do understand. But what I understood was that those feelings are off fallen flesh and are not a choice he was 'born that way' (in fallen flesh), but the sin in homosexuality and transgenderism is choosing to indulge in those fleshly desires instead of denying the flesh and hanging on to truth and running from sexual immorality.

My ex also decided that he was 'born this way' after less than a year of very poor council and just choosing comfort over vows pretty much. But the common thing in both my husband and my friend is that neither of them truly came to God. neither of them truly changed when they said they believe in God and want a relationship with Him.

So maybe I shouldn't be surprised? I am not sure, but what are your thoughts on this?

Like my friend still wants to be friends, he is still going to church but he just wants to practice homosexuality too and in my mind that makes no sense, choosing feelings over truth. And when I struggled God's truth was the line that helped me fight it. I still struggle at times but it has always been easy to deny and ignore after so many years of doing it so why can't other do the same and serve God.

It truly just devastates me but no one really talks about it so yeah - opinions please.

You`re suffering because you miss understand Scripture, homosexuality is a curse inflicted by Elohim upon the wicked. Forget about them! The Book of Roman`s teaches about this.

 

[ResidentAlien]

I am feeling so discouraged, I just got off of a call with one of my friends. who has said he has decided to accept himself and go back to homosexuality and is on tinder, but is still a believer in Christ. He got a bit defensive about it when I said that if you believe in God then why would you disobey him. And he said Christian's don't understand because he never made the choice to be Gay and every one is saying that he has made a choice when he was just born that way.

I told him that as someone who has struggled with same sex attraction out of serious brokenness and mild body dysmorphia that would be considered transgenderism. I do understand. But what I understood was that those feelings are off fallen flesh and are not a choice he was 'born that way' (in fallen flesh), but the sin in homosexuality and transgenderism is choosing to indulge in those fleshly desires instead of denying the flesh and hanging on to truth and running from sexual immorality.

My ex also decided that he was 'born this way' after less than a year of very poor council and just choosing comfort over vows pretty much. But the common thing in both my husband and my friend is that neither of them truly came to God. neither of them truly changed when they said they believe in God and want a relationship with Him.

So maybe I shouldn't be surprised? I am not sure, but what are your thoughts on this?

Like my friend still wants to be friends, he is still going to church but he just wants to practice homosexuality too and in my mind that makes no sense, choosing feelings over truth. And when I struggled God's truth was the line that helped me fight it. I still struggle at times but it has always been easy to deny and ignore after so many years of doing it so why can't other do the same and serve God.

It truly just devastates me but no one really talks about it so yeah - opinions please.

It sounds like you have your head on straight. May be time to move on and drop the excess baggage, or they may drag you down with them.

 

[HealthAndHappiness]

I am feeling so discouraged, I just got off of a call with one of my friends. who has said he has decided to accept himself and go back to homosexuality and is on tinder, but is still a believer in Christ. He got a bit defensive about it when I said that if you believe in God then why would you disobey him. And he said Christian's don't understand because he never made the choice to be Gay and every one is saying that he has made a choice when he was just born that way.

I told him that as someone who has struggled with same sex attraction out of serious brokenness and mild body dysmorphia that would be considered transgenderism. I do understand. But what I understood was that those feelings are off fallen flesh and are not a choice he was 'born that way' (in fallen flesh), but the sin in homosexuality and transgenderism is choosing to indulge in those fleshly desires instead of denying the flesh and hanging on to truth and running from sexual immorality.

My ex also decided that he was 'born this way' after less than a year of very poor council and just choosing comfort over vows pretty much. But the common thing in both my husband and my friend is that neither of them truly came to God. neither of them truly changed when they said they believe in God and want a relationship with Him.

So maybe I shouldn't be surprised? I am not sure, but what are your thoughts on this?

Like my friend still wants to be friends, he is still going to church but he just wants to practice homosexuality too and in my mind that makes no sense, choosing feelings over truth. And when I struggled God's truth was the line that helped me fight it. I still struggle at times but it has always been easy to deny and ignore after so many years of doing it so why can't other do the same and serve God.

It truly just devastates me but no one really talks about it so yeah - opinions please.

My heart goes out to you and anyone in this situation.
I can tell you are suffering through this.

It's your husband who gets priority far beyond the friend.
You both made marriage vows and so I would give priority to that.

Men don't normally change from straight to bi or homosexual.
A councilor cannot talk an adult into deciding to have intimate relations with another man. The Bible calls that unnatural.
Experience shows that men are disgusted by the thought.
I recently researched a childhood TV celebrity who stared in an old TV series to find out that his musical partner wrote weird songs about their private time together. That's a disappointment.

What I would want to know about as a spouse is if he is pursuing and acting out on that fetish or not. I have heard highly impressionable young people talk about identifying falsely when under stress. Not sexual , but in unhealthy mental ways therapists can do, like suggesting they get on dangerous prescription drugs and so forth. Never someone with such proclivities though. I would try to find out if the councilor is planting ideas like, "you were born this way", but that he does not burn in his desires for other men.
Has he been faithful or not?
We don't need to know, but you do.

Psychologists and therapists in general tend to be very liberal and amoral. Some try to manipulate. I would be cautious to jumping to false conclusions because of the tendency to assume the things we fear.
When we are stressed assumptions of worse case scenarios are human nature.
I will pray for your reconciliation and the best for a long happy marriage.

 

[ciicii]

You`re suffering because you miss understand Scripture, homosexuality is a curse inflicted by Elohim upon the wicked. Forget about them! The Book of Roman`s teaches about this.

... Homosexuality is a sin, one that distorts our nature and is a sin against our own body.

Scripture does not say homosexuality is a curse, it is a result of the fallen flesh. Which was something that was desired and the Lord let them to their own unatural desires.

Romans 1:26-27
26 For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature:

27 And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.

That is why I am suffering, because I am watching them destroy themselves.
The Lord says pray for our enemies not to "forget about them". Without prayer I would not have had the discernment to choose against my own pervese desires.

Matthew 5:44
But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you,

And like any other sin, it is clear that all that were saved used to be slaves to sin, that included homosexuality.
1Corinthians 6:11
And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

I have seen God save so many people from this life style, it is just in my personal life that there seems to be no vicotory in their lives which I find tiresome.
I think there is wisdom in boundaries and being clear that I will not be affirming their lifestyle. but to "forget about them" is the opposite of what the Lord tell us to do, towards all sinner and enemies.

And my enemies are those who are not for God.

Matthew 12:30
“Whoever is not with me is against me, and whoever does not gather with me scatters.

 

[ciicii]

My heart goes out to you and anyone in this situation.
I can tell you are suffering through this.

It's your husband who gets priority far beyond the friend.
You both made marriage vows and so I would give priority to that.

Men don't normally change from straight to bi or homosexual.
A councilor cannot talk an adult into deciding to have intimate relations with another man. The Bible calls that unnatural.
Experience shows that men are disgusted by the thought.
I recently researched a childhood TV celebrity who stared in an old TV series to find out that his musical partner wrote weird songs about their private time together. That's a disappointment.

What I would want to know about as a spouse is if he is pursuing and acting out on that fetish or not. I have heard highly impressionable young people talk about identifying falsely when under stress. Not sexual , but in unhealthy mental ways therapists can do, like suggesting they get on dangerous prescription drugs and so forth. Never someone with such proclivities though. I would try to find out if the councilor is planting ideas like, "you were born this way", but that he does not burn in his desires for other men.
Has he been faithful or not?
We don't need to know, but you do.

Psychologists and therapists in general tend to be very liberal and amoral. Some try to manipulate. I would be cautious to jumping to false conclusions because of the tendency to assume the things we fear.
When we are stressed assumptions of worse case scenarios are human nature.
I will pray for your reconciliation and the best for a long happy marriage.

Thank you, yes I did tell him it is not normal for men to just become gay or 'trans' in a few months. and the doctors agree with that.

But then he just kept on researching things that said he is trans, he is gay and he decided that that is all the proof he needed. He didn't want testimonies of people who faught against it or found victory through Christ, and if God was not going to take it away, he just left the faith (althogh he never had a foundation to begin with)

I told him this is all coming from stress, for years he has had stress and anxiety that had just gotten worse to the point it manifested into a physical disability that he still has. But he still neglected it and would not go to counciling for it.

Then of course he found new friends, one gave him advice to just cross dress in secret every few weeks so he could get rid of the stress but ... that would not get rid of it and I had tell him that was not healthy and also against scripture but he didn't care.

He says he did not cheat on me but he was on a lot fo chat sight to 'get it out of his system" and fell into manic episodes with wearing clothes and make up. it was aweful. Now he has a suport system that is total affirmation.

His therapist did not address the anxiety all that much and just told him to get a divorce and signed off on hormones. He still has issues with anxiety worse than ever before even though he is gettign everythign he wants.

"a divorce, hormones, moving out etc ..." I have tried to point that out but he will not listen, he can't see it.

And made it clear from the start (and this is why he needs therapy for confronting his emotions), even when he did want to save the marriage, he was willing to divorce me anyway since the sexual stresses were 'unsolvable' to him but getting rid of me would be easier.

He has gone on gay dating apps as well and swapped pics but he insists it is not cheating. So ... idk. it has been almost a year, I am pretty sure he will be leaving in a month or so at this point.

Thank you for the prayers though and I completely agree with you about everything. none of this is normal, but he has been convinced otherwise. And has been very cruel in the home so I can't really deal with it anymore for my own safety, and the estrogen will just cause more emotional instability, I can't be around when that happens.

 

[HealthAndHappiness]

Thank you, yes I did tell him it is not normal for men to just become gay or 'trans' in a few months. and the doctors agree with that.

But then he just kept on researching things that said he is trans, he is gay and he decided that that is all the proof he needed. He didn't want testimonies of people who faught against it or found victory through Christ, and if God was not going to take it away, he just left the faith (althogh he never had a foundation to begin with)

I told him this is all coming from stress, for years he has had stress and anxiety that had just gotten worse to the point it manifested into a physical disability that he still has. But he still neglected it and would not go to counciling for it.

Then of course he found new friends, one gave him advice to just cross dress in secret every few weeks so he could get rid of the stress but ... that would not get rid of it and I had tell him that was not healthy and also against scripture but he didn't care.

He says he did not cheat on me but he was on a lot fo chat sight to 'get it out of his system" and fell into manic episodes with wearing clothes and make up. it was aweful. Now he has a suport system that is total affirmation.

His therapist did not address the anxiety all that much and just told him to get a divorce and signed off on hormones. He still has issues with anxiety worse than ever before even though he is gettign everythign he wants.

"a divorce, hormones, moving out etc ..." I have tried to point that out but he will not listen, he can't see it.

And made it clear from the start (and this is why he needs therapy for confronting his emotions), even when he did want to save the marriage, he was willing to divorce me anyway since the sexual stresses were 'unsolvable' to him but getting rid of me would be easier.

He has gone on gay dating apps as well and swapped pics but he insists it is not cheating. So ... idk. it has been almost a year, I am pretty sure he will be leaving in a month or so at this point.

Thank you for the prayers though and I completely agree with you about everything. none of this is normal, but he has been convinced otherwise. And has been very cruel in the home so I can't really deal with it anymore for my own safety, and the estrogen will just cause more emotional instability, I can't be around when that happens.

The therapist unfortunately sounds like a Psychiatrist since he's prescribed hormones to transition your husband.
May the Lord Himself end that devil of a therapist's influence upon your husband and every other patient. Pastors should know better than to suggest such wicked influencers to their churches. I've rarely heard a pastor ever warn against them. I've gotten a perspective from seeing the harm they do. I doubt that there's many pastors who've been around long who haven't.

Anyhow, in my first post to you I mentioned soy because it is recommended to new mothers over breastfeeding by many US hospitals. That leads to the rest of my thought at the time. Soy milk and most grains have so much plant estrogens in addition to the Roundup/glyphosate chemical that it's similar to taking birth control pills. The plastics, the processed foods, and herbicides/pesticides all contribute to the harmful effects of estrogen mimickers on our families. I'm not making any excuses for the strange behaviors of your husband, but considered that perhaps it was a potential consideration if he were a young man with serious toxicity. It seems there's much greater issues now that you shared details.

I haven't had time today to listen to my class yet as a Nutritionist who does ongoing education. However, I just took a break before checking here and "coincidentally" hit a random spot in the recording. Check out the 1:35:35 mark on the following Q&A someone asked Dr Osborne about his personal challenge.

That said, it sounds as if your man is seeking confirmation for his sins. He is in a very dangerous place in the crossroad of life to be making such associations with those reprobates.
I will pray that the Lord will do something significant to help him reconsider his self harm and selfishness that's hurtful to you.

May the Lord encourage and give you strength.

 

[ciicii]

The therapist unfortunately sounds like a Psychiatrist since he's prescribed hormones to transition your husband.
May the Lord Himself end that devil of a therapist's influence upon your husband and every other patient. Pastors should know better than to suggest such wicked influencers to their churches. I've rarely heard a pastor ever warn against them. I've gotten a perspective from seeing the harm they do. I doubt that there's many pastors who've been around long who haven't.

Anyhow, in my first post to you I mentioned soy because it is recommended to new mothers over breastfeeding by many US hospitals. That leads to the rest of my thought at the time. Soy milk and most grains have so much plant estrogens in addition to the Roundup/glyphosate chemical that it's similar to taking birth control pills. The plastics, the processed foods, and herbicides/pesticides all contribute to the harmful effects of estrogen mimickers on our families. I'm not making any excuses for the strange behaviors of your husband, but considered that perhaps it was a potential consideration if he were a young man with serious toxicity. It seems there's much greater issues now that you shared details.

I haven't had time today to listen to my class yet as a Nutritionist who does ongoing education. However, I just took a break before checking here and "coincidentally" hit a random spot in the recording. Check out the 1:35:35 mark on the following Q&A someone asked Dr Osborne about his personal challenge.

That said, it sounds as if your man is seeking confirmation for his sins. He is in a very dangerous place in the crossroad of life to be making such associations with those reprobates.
I will pray that the Lord will do something significant to help him reconsider his self harm and selfishness that's hurtful to you.

May the Lord encourage and give you strength.

No he wasn't a psychiatrist, he just gave him the recommendation papers to a specialist. it is very easy in Canada.

I agree, I do think therapy is good, but not therapy that focuses on the self ... this therapist even got docked for ghosting him for months they only had a few sessions before disappearing again.

But that's not important anymore I suppose.
Oh yes I understand about the extra hormones, even in our water. But he was breast fed by a family that eats a lot of home made foods.

I do think he has deficiencies though, especially with the increase of his intestinal issues. and that makes a lot of sense with the clip you shared. I am shocked that he even admited that.

Good luck with your studies with nurtition too btw. It is a very important job so I very much appreciate you and your work.

Thank you thank so much for your prayers too, it means a lot since honestly my personal prayers towards him are limited, they are harder but I do want him to be saved. if he were to repent and try I would be more than willing to stay.

I pray you have a blessed day though as well.

 

[ciicii]

actually come to think of it and idk if it can effect you in your 30s or late 20s but he has drank a lot of soy milk for multiple years when he learned he was lactose intolerant and wanted extra protein. he found soy with extra protein and found it easier than protein powder. he's been doing that for 4 out of the ten years we've been together so idk.

I am a bit convicted now too because I wouldn't know how to tell him that or if he would even listen.

 

[Ceph]

You should ask him:
Do you want to be gay, or are you being made to be gay?
Are there sexual images in your mind that you can't escape?
If you call to Jesus from your mind, does something change?

 

[HealthAndHappiness]

actually come to think of it and idk if it can effect you in your 30s or late 20s but he has drank a lot of soy milk for multiple years when he learned he was lactose intolerant and wanted extra protein. he found soy with extra protein and found it easier than protein powder. he's been doing that for 4 out of the ten years we've been together so idk.

I am a bit convicted now too because I wouldn't know how to tell him that or if he would even listen.

I doubt that's the problem at his age. However, I have theorized that there's a direct attack upon masculinity by social scientists changing cultural norms, atrozine, and glyphosate on food, water contains hormone disruptors as well as additives to grains. Instead of iodine, they put bromides in doughs as a spoilage prevention and to kill insects. It blocks the mastor gland from functioning and a host of other things. I've studied this issue on and off from the perspective of toxicology, nutrition, sociology and the Bible. Sometimes there are multiple influences, but the people who are effected must want to be what God designed them to be. Only then will He send people who provide true help. This is especially true if they trust Christ to save them. Then they will have the indwelling Holy Spirit and His Word to set them apart from sins.

Short on the topic by the one who popularized the issue by his enemies that mocked him.

 

[Gideon300]

I am feeling so discouraged, I just got off of a call with one of my friends. who has said he has decided to accept himself and go back to homosexuality and is on tinder, but is still a believer in Christ. He got a bit defensive about it when I said that if you believe in God then why would you disobey him. And he said Christian's don't understand because he never made the choice to be Gay and every one is saying that he has made a choice when he was just born that way.

I told him that as someone who has struggled with same sex attraction out of serious brokenness and mild body dysmorphia that would be considered transgenderism. I do understand. But what I understood was that those feelings are off fallen flesh and are not a choice he was 'born that way' (in fallen flesh), but the sin in homosexuality and transgenderism is choosing to indulge in those fleshly desires instead of denying the flesh and hanging on to truth and running from sexual immorality.

My ex also decided that he was 'born this way' after less than a year of very poor council and just choosing comfort over vows pretty much. But the common thing in both my husband and my friend is that neither of them truly came to God. neither of them truly changed when they said they believe in God and want a relationship with Him.

So maybe I shouldn't be surprised? I am not sure, but what are your thoughts on this?

Like my friend still wants to be friends, he is still going to church but he just wants to practice homosexuality too and in my mind that makes no sense, choosing feelings over truth. And when I struggled God's truth was the line that helped me fight it. I still struggle at times but it has always been easy to deny and ignore after so many years of doing it so why can't other do the same and serve God.

It truly just devastates me but no one really talks about it so yeah - opinions please.

The root cause of homosexuality is rebellion against God, as proclaimed by Paul Romans 1. A friend of mine was homosexual before he was saved. I did not know this until years later. He left Australia and went to Portland Bible College. He got married and had two children. I lost contact with him after a few years.

I found out that Michael had backslid and went back to his former way of life. This was before treatment for AIDS was readily available. He died from AIDS. He repented before he passed away. Mike was one of a kind. Immensely talented, popular with many, sang in professional choirs and had perfect pitch. Such a waste.

Your friend needs to know that we reap what we sow. God is mocked. Sin is sin. This is not a condemnation. Our intent is to save him from the path that leads to destruction.

 

[ciicii]

You should ask him:
Do you want to be gay, or are you being made to be gay?
Are there sexual images in your mind that you can't escape?
If you call to Jesus from your mind, does something change?

He doesn't want to be but he doesn't think he has a choice. That is the lie.
But even when coming to Christ people in this pool can still struggle with these thoughts at times that is why we are told to take every thought captive (2 cor 10:15)
and he has lost his faith so he will not be calling to Him. (both the people in my life that are dealing with this)
one has no faith and the other has decided to make an idol out of God by going to church and living this lifestyle at the same time thinking it is okay since he also believe he was 'born that way'.
I believe they are reprobate at this point tbh.

 

[ciicii]

e people who are effected must want to be what God designed them to be

Amen that is the biggest key, my ex and my friend neither of them want to live with God. So even with the truth I don't think they will see it.

I've seen this video actually, that is how i learned about the extra hormones in water from all the medications people are on and stuff like that.

It is unfortunate and a bit scary at times

 

[ciicii]

The root cause of homosexuality is rebellion against God, as proclaimed by Paul Romans 1. A friend of mine was homosexual before he was saved. I did not know this until years later. He left Australia and went to Portland Bible College. He got married and had two children. I lost contact with him after a few years.

I found out that Michael had backslid and went back to his former way of life. This was before treatment for AIDS was readily available. He died from AIDS. He repented before he passed away. Mike was one of a kind. Immensely talented, popular with many, sang in professional choirs and had perfect pitch. Such a waste.

Your friend needs to know that we reap what we sow. God is mocked. Sin is sin. This is not a condemnation. Our intent is to save him from the path that leads to destruction.

I agree and that is very sad. I am glad he repented in the end but yeah, that is a waste a very sad one.

 

[Ceph]

He doesn't want to be but he doesn't think he has a choice. That is the lie.
But even when coming to Christ people in this pool can still struggle with these thoughts at times that is why we are told to take every thought captive (2 cor 10:15)
and he has lost his faith so he will not be calling to Him. (both the people in my life that are dealing with this)
one has no faith and the other has decided to make an idol out of God by going to church and living this lifestyle at the same time thinking it is okay since he also believe he was 'born that way'.
I believe they are reprobate at this point tbh.

He needs to know that he's foolish and that this is literally playing with where he's ending up in eternity.
He thinks he won't be calling on God? There's no escape from God. There's only one heaven and one hell to go to, everybody sees the same kinds of things based on their spiritual condition, and you need to set it into him; God is showing him that he's going to hell in his mind.
It literally costs nothing to call on God. All he has to do is try to call on God. Try to save his life by believing the Gospel. Set it into him, that the easiest thing he can do is ask Jesus Christ to save him from an eternity in eternal pain. Just try that.

 

[ciicii]

He needs to know that he's foolish and that this is literally playing with where he's ending up in eternity.
He thinks he won't be calling on God? There's no escape from God. There's only one heaven and one hell to go to, everybody sees the same kinds of things based on their spiritual condition, and you need to set it into him; God is showing him that he's going to hell in his mind.
It literally costs nothing to call on God. All he has to do is try to call on God. Try to save his life by believing the Gospel. Set it into him, that the easiest thing he can do is ask Jesus Christ to save him from an eternity in eternal pain. Just try that.

I understand and i have but like the fool in proverbs he says there is no god. So i cannot do anything more.

 

[HearfeltWhispers]

I’m sorry to hear this. Unfortunately sometimes it is best to cut ties if you are this conflicted. It does seem your friend wants their cake and to eat it too. All you can do is pray they come back to god.

 

[ciicii]

I’m sorry to hear this. Unfortunately sometimes it is best to cut ties if you are this conflicted. It does seem your friend wants their cake and to eat it too. All you can do is pray they come back to god.

Thanks :/ I know I just hate it

 

[HearfeltWhispers]

Thanks :/ I know I just hate it

I feel you honestly. I’ve had to over time slowly remove friends and people from my life. It does suck. It does. As time passes though you will come to peace with it knowing you are choosing a life for god. That’s how I feel anyway.