Honest question....why don't churches teach the best way to avoid fornication is to get married?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
Get a few new songs for your jukebox. The same ole song will just get the same results. Wish you the best but until you expand your field of vision, the view will never change.
My original post is about how the church handles sex. Most churches I know have avoided the subject. Why won't churches push marriage as the answer for many, to fornication?
 

ResidentAlien

Well-known member
Apr 21, 2021
8,312
3,618
113
We get it John. You think you were dealt a bad hand by Calvary Chapel and you're still carrying a grudge around all these years later. Get over it already.
 

HeIsHere

Well-known member
May 21, 2022
5,900
2,288
113
Get a few new songs for your jukebox. The same ole song will just get the same results. Wish you the best but until you expand your field of vision, the view will never change.
Good advise, proper hermeneutics will help as well.

Audience relevance and historical context, not the post modern day lens.
 

HeIsHere

Well-known member
May 21, 2022
5,900
2,288
113
My original post is about how the church handles sex. Most churches I know have avoided the subject. Why won't churches push marriage as the answer for many, to fornication?
I think people have known about marriage for a long time without the 'church" having to push it.
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
19,218
6,610
113
62
My original post is about how the church handles sex. Most churches I know have avoided the subject. Why won't churches push marriage as the answer for many, to fornication?
It's a fair point. But I suspect most churches today aren't keen on many things other than attendance or offerings.
My concern is for you. Marriage isn't to be entered lightly and there is much more entailed in it than intimacy.
Marriage doesn't solve problems but it will certainly exacerbate them. Even in the best of marriages problems exist because marriages are comprised of fallen people. I very much enjoy the estate of marriage but there are no days off.
 

ChristsChild

Active member
Apr 28, 2023
213
109
43
It's a fair point. But I suspect most churches today aren't keen on many things other than attendance or offerings.
My concern is for you. Marriage isn't to be entered lightly and there is much more entailed in it than intimacy.
Marriage doesn't solve problems but it will certainly exacerbate them. Even in the best of marriages problems exist because marriages are comprised of fallen people. I very much enjoy the estate of marriage but there are no days off.
I took the OP seriously at first. However, after page upon page of the same repeat rhetoric, I've arrived at the conclusion this isn't a sincere OP or thread on their part.

Because the majority of the repeating rhetoric is saying in worldly implications while referring to Paul and Jesus so to keep it somewhat biblical, Paul and Jesus agree, if you feel horny don't act out,get married instead.

A bit like the inevitable masturbation threads that can always be found on Christian discussion forums that permit the topic.

All intended to shock and play the faithful who take the topics seriously.

It seems like there are a few threads of that type here. All started by new members.

Just my observation.
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
19,218
6,610
113
62
I took the OP seriously at first. However, after page upon page of the same repeat rhetoric, I've arrived at the conclusion this isn't a sincere OP or thread on their part.

Because the majority of the repeating rhetoric is saying in worldly implications while referring to Paul and Jesus so to keep it somewhat biblical, Paul and Jesus agree, if you feel horny don't act out,get married instead.

A bit like the inevitable masturbation threads that can always be found on Christian discussion forums that permit the topic.

All intended to shock and play the faithful who take the topics seriously.

It seems like there are a few threads of that type here. All started by new members.

Just my observation.
John is a really nice guy. But like many people, he has been hurt and the wound has not healed. That coupled with his insistence that only one pathway offers any help has left him in his current estate.
We all need others to come alongside us at times and to bear with us through such times. I'm more inclined to both think and hope for the best. I've seen firsthand how others have helped me in such times and would rather try to resuscitate one more time with the paddles rather than call a time of death.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
25,472
13,785
113
Paul and Jesus didn't seem to think so. Their number one reason for marriage was to control the sexual desires.
Wrong.

The reason for marriage is not "to control the sexual desires"; rather, marriage is given by God as the appropriate venue for the expression of sexual desires (among its other purposes). For the believer (that is the context of this discussion, isn't it?) the fruit of the Holy Spirit is (among other things) self-control.

That self-control is effective at curbing the inappropriate expression of sexual desires, within and outside marriage.
 

oyster67

Senior Member
May 24, 2014
11,887
8,705
113
Honest question....why don't churches teach the best way to avoid fornication is to get married?


Ummm.... :rolleyes::unsure:... because it is so freaking obvious? :confused:

1 Corinthians 7:9
“But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.”

(It would be sad if that were the only reason, though... but it sounds like you are in really dire need of a lid for your hotpot.)

Have you taken this to the Lord in prayer yet, John?
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
Wrong.

The reason for marriage is not "to control the sexual desires"; rather, marriage is given by God as the appropriate venue for the expression of sexual desires (among its other purposes). For the believer (that is the context of this discussion, isn't it?) the fruit of the Holy Spirit is (among other things) self-control.

That self-control is effective at curbing the inappropriate expression of sexual desires, within and outside marriage.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. 1 Corin 7
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
Because everytime I prayed about it and looked, the one i picked would be moved out of the way or they were someone I had no attraction to. I could be in a group of 10 women, 9 of them I was attracted to. The only one to show an interest in me would be the one I had no attraction in. would you marry someone you were not attracted to?
 

oyster67

Senior Member
May 24, 2014
11,887
8,705
113
Because everytime I prayed about it and looked, the one i picked would be moved out of the way or they were someone I had no attraction to. I could be in a group of 10 women, 9 of them I was attracted to. The only one to show an interest in me would be the one I had no attraction in. would you marry someone you were not attracted to?
Being attracted only to women who are not attracted to you sounds like a serious problem. Would you consider yourself to be predatorial?
 

HopeinHim98

Well-known member
Mar 16, 2023
529
417
63
Because everytime I prayed about it and looked, the one i picked would be moved out of the way or they were someone I had no attraction to. I could be in a group of 10 women, 9 of them I was attracted to. The only one to show an interest in me would be the one I had no attraction in. would you marry someone you were not attracted to?
No I don't think so unless I was desperate lol. Or maybe if I lived in the Regency era and I was 27, no fortune, and frightened like Charlotte Lucas and a Mr. Collins came along lol..

No but seriously. If so many women aren't attracted to you there may be an underlying problem.
 

Karlon

Well-known member
Mar 8, 2023
2,604
1,173
113
there are varying answers. but i think some of the top answers now-a-days are that its 1 of those things that parents teach at home. especially for a girl to remain a virgin til she gets married, also it's viewed as an embarrassing subject to many (or just that its private), so the talk is expunged & people are conditioned that its a shy subject.
 

CS1

Well-known member
May 23, 2012
13,058
4,344
113
Because everytime I prayed about it and looked, the one i picked would be moved out of the way or they were someone I had no attraction to. I could be in a group of 10 women, 9 of them I was attracted to. The only one to show an interest in me would be the one I had no attraction in. would you marry someone you were not attracted to?
Maybe your standard of attraction needs to be revamped.

First off, one must be honest about what they are attracted to. And what is it about the one that doesn't attract you? Many men are not looking for Ms. right but more of Ms. Right NOW!
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
25,472
13,785
113
Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. 1 Corin 7
That doesn't say that the reason for marriage is to avoid fornication. It says that marriage is the solution to the problem of fornication.
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
60,171
29,475
113
Or maybe if I lived in the Regency era and I was 27, no fortune, and frightened like Charlotte Lucas and a Mr. Collins came along lol..
Oh, another Austen fan! .(y):D