Hello everyone. Im new to Christian chat forums and I would like to make a prayer request. To make a long story short, my soul tie was formed in adultery. I slept with another man, while being married, because I felt like I wasn't getting what I wanted at home. This man gave me an incurable disease that I can never get rid of. Herpes. Once I found out, i got really angry and publicly humiliated him by telling everyone that he had it while still wanting to be with him in the process. He also disrespected me by penetrating me with no protection knowing that it wasn't what I wanted to do. Even after all that I still wanted him and kept messing around with him knowing that he was no good for me. Whenever he wouldn't be texting me and would ignore my text messages I would get fake phone numbers and talk to him that way because any attention was satisfying for me. I would drive by his house for no reason at ALL. Ever since I slept with him ,I have serious demons tormenting me. I think about murdering him, disfiguring his face, and tortuing him. I also have thoughts of lesbian sex and feel like no one likes me. I often feel like I'm not pretty enough. I feel sad. I feel like I'm just worthless. I've been praying and I remove myself from social media and broke all contact with him.