How many of you are open to having new Christian friendships?
- Thread starter arc2k5
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How did this turn from a discussion on friendship (sounds like we may have different definitions of what a friend is) to a discussion on who has value and worth and who should be in our congregations? I'm not saying that the people I'm not friends with (either because I don't feel enough lack to get to know them better or know them well enough to know I don't have much in common with them) don't have value or worth (though I've met a few people who really really challenge the idea that everyone has those) or shouldn't be part of a church. I'm just saying I'd rather have 1 or 2 good friends than frequently be around 20 people casually. And I'm introverted enough that I don't value my casual acquaintances all that highly, but I've seen plenty of people who want to do stuff but don't want to do it alone and can understand they might value such more highly.
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Im not sure either...
But I count those as friends who claim Christ as Lord and Savior and demonstrate that relationship...IOW have enough evidence to convict them of that...and church membership is not enough to do so.
An odd list spanning country borders and denominations...but they are friends with the right to claim friendship...but there are rings...I have a difficult time having a close relationship with my friend in Italy or the group in Slovakia or Brazil... But I do keep tabs on them and if I can get with them in person it's wonderful all over again.
I have families here in the town I live in that are much closer...and those I attend church with that I don't count as friends. All a matter of convenience.
My wife is my best friend though...
But I count those as friends who claim Christ as Lord and Savior and demonstrate that relationship...IOW have enough evidence to convict them of that...and church membership is not enough to do so.
An odd list spanning country borders and denominations...but they are friends with the right to claim friendship...but there are rings...I have a difficult time having a close relationship with my friend in Italy or the group in Slovakia or Brazil... But I do keep tabs on them and if I can get with them in person it's wonderful all over again.
I have families here in the town I live in that are much closer...and those I attend church with that I don't count as friends. All a matter of convenience.
My wife is my best friend though...
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I think if you live in the country or small town where its isolated you naturally spend more time with the same small group of people...or maybe you just know everyone already.
In a big city its more you can be friends with more people but they can come and go out of your life...but its easier to find groups with common interests...this is why univeristies etc have clubs or in the US its sorororities and fraternities, although I kinda dont like the culture that seems to be portrayed in the movies of it being 'mean girls' and 'bullying boys'
It doesnt have to be that way.
In a big city its more you can be friends with more people but they can come and go out of your life...but its easier to find groups with common interests...this is why univeristies etc have clubs or in the US its sorororities and fraternities, although I kinda dont like the culture that seems to be portrayed in the movies of it being 'mean girls' and 'bullying boys'
It doesnt have to be that way.
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Got more than a few married women too.
This started as the singles forum years and years ago, but it has evolved into the default place for cool people to hang out and chat about random interesting stuff.
Also some of the old hands here started out single and married somewhere along the way. A few even met here.
If we kicked out all the married folks we would lose some really cool friends. Ain't gonna do that.
This started as the singles forum years and years ago, but it has evolved into the default place for cool people to hang out and chat about random interesting stuff.
Also some of the old hands here started out single and married somewhere along the way. A few even met here.
If we kicked out all the married folks we would lose some really cool friends. Ain't gonna do that.
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I've been on since 2011 and this has always been the case. And the site owner makes it able to to happen by not prohibiting them. If I recall, years back, the site owner gave singles the option to restrict teens and married (since the singles forum is 18 plus) and it was agreed to let them continue to come in.
The sites subforums seem to be more general guidelines than strict rules.
And since the Singles forum is not intended to be a place for people to hunt down spouses, but is more a general chat area, no one has a problem with them. And at times you'll see posters here offer married people to respond to posts to get their take.
So, no, it's not unusual at all here.
The sites subforums seem to be more general guidelines than strict rules.
And since the Singles forum is not intended to be a place for people to hunt down spouses, but is more a general chat area, no one has a problem with them. And at times you'll see posters here offer married people to respond to posts to get their take.
So, no, it's not unusual at all here.
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I don't mean to offend...
I'm definitely not interested in "hooking up"...I'm very much in love with my wife.
But I would think that singles interested in being in a relationship would want advice from those who have successful relationships with a spouse.
You know... advice from the old married guys wouldn't be shunned.
I'm definitely not interested in "hooking up"...I'm very much in love with my wife.
But I would think that singles interested in being in a relationship would want advice from those who have successful relationships with a spouse.
You know... advice from the old married guys wouldn't be shunned.
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Theres a family forum.. I'm sure if anyone wants advice from married people that would be the place to look. It comes off as creepy to see married men in a singles forum.
Since when are women ok with their husband interacting with single women in a singles forum? If you have an open relationship congratulations. But generally speaking the optics of this just doesn't look good. I understood your answer but it just isn't one that seems reasonable. But that's between you and your wife. Assuming she's aware.
Since when are women ok with their husband interacting with single women in a singles forum? If you have an open relationship congratulations. But generally speaking the optics of this just doesn't look good. I understood your answer but it just isn't one that seems reasonable. But that's between you and your wife. Assuming she's aware.
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