How to patiently wait for God's timing for the right woman.

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tourist said:
It has been my observation on this site that 'waiting for 'God's perfect timing' for the right woman, is code for either fear of commitment, fear of rejection or unrealistic or naïve expectations. There have been rare exceptions to this but basically, from my perspective, this is what that phrase really means. Then, when they feel the window of opportunity has been closed, some start blaming God or just accept that it was God's will and desire for them to remain alone their entire adult life even though their own eyes were closed to any possible opportunity that arose and were afraid or unwilling to take decisive positive action to establish a relationship that would possibly result in marriage.
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truth has been spoken.
 
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Being single all my life, in my opinion, some are not meant to be married, some are not interested, or some just don't want to have the complications that comes with marriage, and with the world we live in today, you cannot blame people for not wanting to get married.

I have learnt to become content with being single. For me I believe such a lifestyle was never meant for me. Just with all of my circumstances in life has led me to this conclusion. It took me a while, but I myself am at a state of peaceful happiness with my singleness. I need not worry about having children to be brainwashed by a corrupt system, need not worry about having children to become so confused they don't know what gender they are, don't have to worry about having children to become addicted to drugs and so on.

From my point of view, I actually have been spared a lot of pain and grief, considering the world we live in. But it does come at a price, and sadly that price is loneliness. In some ways it can be seen as a trade-off.

All single people will have a desire for companionship, it is a natural emotion. But for the world we live in today, you have to ask this question "Is marriage worth the risk?" This is something only each individual can decide.
 
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Hmm...some thoughts in no particular structure or order.

For me, 33yr, never married, never touched a women. I think my life is in order with my own house and a steady career and in my last semester of finishing a postgrad diploma in Theology but I still have lots of maturing to do!

My job means I move around the country every 2-3 years but meeting women for me isn't an issue rather its getting to the dating/courting part. I have done some bad postings but I think at each location what made it a little worthwhile was getting involved in serving the church. I'm really thankful that I'm part of the wider Christian body so I can make insta-friends by rocking up to church.

When I got used to working full time, I figured I get into kids ministry Grade 3-4 and really enjoyed it. Then I volunteered for the youth group at my next job posting, then after that took a short break and did music and started the grad dip. Recently, I finished another position where I was asked to mentor to young men and was asked to discuss the topic of relationships too (yeah, the white elephant was that I was single but Paul and Martin Luther both taught on it so I was happy to expound some scripture). I think when I look back, each posting was worth it even though I had some bad bosses that made life miserable since the little bit of work I did with the young Christians would hopefully grow inside them to build the next generation of Christians. I've also had a better appreciation of the running a church and how the pastor has to manage the church.

So if you're wondering how to wait patiently for God's timing for the right woman, there's two people I'd paraphrase:

GEN James Mattis - do something worthwhile with your life so you don't end up 40yrs old and on a bed contemplating suicide.
John Piper - don't waste your life! (read his book)

Whilst some jobs are more noble than each other, people will forget about you or some other person will come and ruin your legacy. The work we do for the Kingdom is eternal and will see the fruition on that Last Day since we can't take our wealth or possessions but we'll see our Christian brothers and sisters in the next life. I think that's what Paul meant when he referred to one of the churches as his crown and glory.

I still do desire for marriage but I've also wrestled with the idea that should God's decision for me is singleness I may need to embrace it less I fight against God's will.
 
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Im an older lady of 61yrs was married a long time ago. Our children are adults and have there own lives. Interestingly enough none of our five children have chosen to marry. Three have companions that they live with two of those three have children to the companion. I believe in the sanctity of marriage. Have been away from my husband now 30yrs and think it maybe time to settle down. And yes a woman becomes independent in many ways, but nothing beats the companionship of a caring male. My trust is in God for the perfect man, and when that time happens I will love him warts moles and all. Some eligible men have presented themselves, I trust the lord so much he showed me these were not from him but of there own intent. When a man can say as Derek Prince did to his last wife. I believe we are to be married, without emotion but in obedience, I will be ready. I hope this blesses some one out there.
 
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Skins said:
Im an older lady of 61yrs was married a long time ago. Our children are adults and have there own lives. Interestingly enough none of our five children have chosen to marry. Three have companions that they live with two of those three have children to the companion. I believe in the sanctity of marriage. Have been away from my husband now 30yrs and think it maybe time to settle down. And yes a woman becomes independent in many ways, but nothing beats the companionship of a caring male. My trust is in God for the perfect man, and when that time happens I will love him warts moles and all. Some eligible men have presented themselves, I trust the lord so much he showed me these were not from him but of there own intent. When a man can say as Derek Prince did to his last wife. I believe we are to be married, without emotion but in obedience, I will be ready. I hope this blesses some one out there.
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Good for you. Go for it!!!
 
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For the sake of simplicity, you can know what not to do. We all mostly learn from mistakes. If you're like me though, having an avoidant personality without that changing anytime makes a challenge.
Shared terminology seldom exists in online dating, when communication is important. A "creep" is an example of such loosely proscribed language that varies widely.

Also of concern is the role of fantasies or fictions, whether in a relationship or as an unattached person. Because you can strongly hold these conceptions in your mind (both men and women seem to be complicit in), which may be an unrepresentative idea in reality yet not resisted for some reason. This could be a mechanism of protection, or adversely on the level of a personal defect.
 
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