I’m having a hard time forgiving others

[Awerkinpro99]

This is something I struggle with. I have a coworker that has a history of using bullying and underhanded tactics. He had numerous H.R. complaints and has since cleaned up his behavior.
I’ve had a real tough time forgiving this man for his past misdeeds. I know it’s something our Heavenly Father wants us all to so, I always say the words, “I forgive him.” I always pray that God will help me to forgive him too. However, I don’t feel any different towards him now as apposed to before when I wasn’t trying to forgive him and, also, seeking the Lords’ help to do so. It feels like I haven’t forgiven him at all.
I know the scriptures clearly say that if a Christian leaves this Earth while still harboring unforgiveness in his heart, he won’t be allowed into God’s kingdom. And, this concerns me to no end.
I’m not sure what to do.

 

[Stranger36147]

I have this problem as well. Forgiveness can be hard, depending on what is said or done.

 

[Deuteronomy]

This is something I struggle with. I have a coworker that has a history of using bullying and underhanded tactics. He had numerous H.R. complaints and has since cleaned up his behavior.
I’ve had a real tough time forgiving this man for his past misdeeds. I know it’s something our Heavenly Father wants us all to so, I always say the words, “I forgive him.” I always pray that God will help me to forgive him too. However, I don’t feel any different towards him now as apposed to before when I wasn’t trying to forgive him and, also, seeking the Lords’ help to do so. It feels like I haven’t forgiven him at all.
I know the scriptures clearly say that if a Christian leaves this Earth while still harboring unforgiveness in his heart, he won’t be allowed into God’s kingdom. And, this concerns me to no end.
I’m not sure what to do.

Hi Awerkinpro99, I have a question or two before I comment .. if that's ok with you? Did this coworker of yours bully and use underhanded tactics against you personally, and if so, has he asked for your forgiveness?

Thanks!

God bless you! (1 Thessalonians 5:23-24)

~Deut
p.s. - as far as your concern goes, I wouldn't worry any more than you already have, because the very same One who saved you in the first place has promised to continue His mighty work in you and in your life (to continually grow you up in Christlikeness, and to see you safely through this life to be with Him in Glory .. Philippians 1:6, 2:13; Hebrews 7:25).

 

[Deuteronomy]

Hi again @Awerkinpro99, since I noticed that you are brand new around here, I also meant to say, welcome to CChat

God bless you!

~Deut

Numbers 6
24 The LORD bless you and keep you;
25 The LORD make His face shine upon you,
And be gracious to you;
26 The LORD lift up His countenance upon you,
And give you peace.​

.

 

[CharliRenee]

Welcome, I get it. It is challenging, especially if it is an ongoing offense, especially if they get away with it. I tell you what helps me...realizing I too need forgiving. Mercy is not always easy, especially with folks we don't enjoy being around. But I think it gives us an opportunity to grow our capacity to love and to forgive, no matter what, so for that I am thankful. I honestly think, though, that we need His help, He is in control. Sometimes, we need time to process forgiveness. I am so grateful for His forgiveness and so I think the least we can do is try with all we have to love more and forgive more, loving mercy best as we can. Again though, with all that said, I know it can be so hard. Thank goodness we have Him to help us. I will lift you and the coworker in prayer. God Bless you. Wouldn't it be cool if God reveals Himself and His Glory in this situation and with both you and the coworker.

 

[Mezame83]

It can be difficult to deal with someone like that but one thing i try to remember is that our fight is not against flesh and blood. I like how Jesus said in Luke 23:34 Father forgive them for they know knot what they do. Yes it can slip your mind in the heat of the moment but knowing that there's a reason behind every action helps me to look beyond the persons behaviour and pray for them, to use it as an opportunity to exercise my faith and shine light in the darkness,
I will pray for you and this situation.
God bless you.

 

[Awerkinpro99]

Hi Awerkinpro99, I have a question or two before I comment .. if that's ok with you? Did this coworker of yours bully and use underhanded tactics against you personally, and if so, has he asked for your forgiveness?

Thanks!

God bless you! (1 Thessalonians 5:23-24)

~Deut
p.s. - as far as your concern goes, I wouldn't worry any more than you already have, because the very same One who saved you in the first place has promised to continue His mighty work in you and in your life (to continually grow you up in Christlikeness, and to see you safely through this life to be with Him in Glory .. Philippians 1:6, 2:13; Hebrews 7:25).

He has bullied a lot of people and has a certain degree of power. He never once has apologized. He has an arrogant way about him where he thinks he is above reproach.
My feelings regarding him are also similar to others who work at the same place and also have to deal with him. And many of them are Christians too.

 

[Adstar]

This is something I struggle with. I have a coworker that has a history of using bullying and underhanded tactics. He had numerous H.R. complaints and has since cleaned up his behavior.
I’ve had a real tough time forgiving this man for his past misdeeds. I know it’s something our Heavenly Father wants us all to so, I always say the words, “I forgive him.” I always pray that God will help me to forgive him too. However, I don’t feel any different towards him now as apposed to before when I wasn’t trying to forgive him and, also, seeking the Lords’ help to do so. It feels like I haven’t forgiven him at all.
I know the scriptures clearly say that if a Christian leaves this Earth while still harboring unforgiveness in his heart, he won’t be allowed into God’s kingdom. And, this concerns me to no end.
I’m not sure what to do.

I helps me to give that person over to the LORD knowing God will judge that person justly..

 

[TabinRivCA]

Also, you could get w/the other Christians there and pray over the person and then give thanks daily God is working/blessing him.
'All things are possible with God'. ...'Pray for them that spitefully you...' Mt 5:44

 

[oyster67]

No one knows more about being bullied that Jesus.
It's so good to know that He understands how we feel emotionally. He has felt great pain physically. He knows about being humiliated in public.

Here are some Bible verses for us:

Isaiah
53:1 Who hath believed our report? and to whom is the arm of the LORD revealed?
53:2 For he shall grow up before him as a tender plant, and as a root out of a dry ground: he hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, [there is] no beauty that we should desire him.
53:3 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were [our] faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
53:4 Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
53:5 But he [was] wounded for our transgressions, [he was] bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace [was] upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.
53:6 All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the LORD hath laid on him the iniquity of us all.
53:7 He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth: he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth.

Luke
6:22 Blessed are ye, when men shall hate you, and when they shall separate you [from their company], and shall reproach [you], and cast out your name as evil, for the Son of man's sake.
6:23 Rejoice ye in that day, and leap for joy: for, behold, your reward [is] great in heaven: for in the like manner did their fathers unto the prophets.
6:24 But woe unto you that are rich! for ye have received your consolation.
6:25 Woe unto you that are full! for ye shall hunger. Woe unto you that laugh now! for ye shall mourn and weep.
6:26 Woe unto you, when all men shall speak well of you! for so did their fathers to the false prophets.

Matthew
10:24 The disciple is not above [his] master, nor the servant above his lord.
10:25 It is enough for the disciple that he be as his master, and the servant as his lord. If they have called the master of the house Beelzebub, how much more [shall they call] them of his household?

Think it not a strange thing that we are persecutd. He is to be pitied. His eternity is not looking so good. Just don't let him drag you down into the pit with him.

We must all pray, one for another, that we might find victory over these battles against bitterness.