I’m single and not really digging it.
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"I prune a lot". Don't you mean to say as the vinedresser he prunes you? Certainly we can "weed" and practice good stewardship but there are limits I have found. That's the child-like element that sort of imposes humility by default.
Right now I'm imagining falling a mud puddle and cleaning off with a garden hose. Depending on the sincere care and not flippant disregard for the parental command to "wash off" there are still limits to how well a child can wash themselves. Knowledge is part of it, as well as the system not being fully designed that way.
If it were just being alone with the Lord in the garden it would make sense that he would clean what we could not, but we also have the body and I think that is a resource as well that can't be neglected.
I'm not 100% on how I feel about C.S Lewis (and fantastical analogies are iffy) but there was a section of Voyage of the Dawn Treader where Eustace was told to undress (dragon skin) he accomplished something once he understood, but it required deep tears that hurt by the allegorical Christ character to fully "undress". He was unable to do it himself.
So while I do think we can do a bit of pruning "in a way", our efforts are mere maintenance (stewardship) with the natural byproduct of maturation but serious work we can't do on our own. I'm only saying this because I appreciated your post and it got me to thinking about our own efforts. I know there are some churches I've heard that only speak about the Lord doing the work in you and that it's all him. Tis true, but we aren't infants needing someone to change us. As we mature there is a sort of "self-maintenance" that goes on and should be understood, it's just rarely talked about. Part of the reason I typed all this is because there are times where I have been so wrapped up in Christian living that my eyes leave the Lord at times. Not "leaving" him if you understand me, but even going through a similar journey that you seem to have gone through it helps me to remember that.
I can't shake the feeling that as believers we can fall into "our" will for the kingdom and exalt ourselves a bit and go astray. Perhaps that's better than being asleep, but sometimes it's hard for me to tell. Constant guarding is crucial I agree.
Thanks for sharing
Right now I'm imagining falling a mud puddle and cleaning off with a garden hose. Depending on the sincere care and not flippant disregard for the parental command to "wash off" there are still limits to how well a child can wash themselves. Knowledge is part of it, as well as the system not being fully designed that way.
If it were just being alone with the Lord in the garden it would make sense that he would clean what we could not, but we also have the body and I think that is a resource as well that can't be neglected.
I'm not 100% on how I feel about C.S Lewis (and fantastical analogies are iffy) but there was a section of Voyage of the Dawn Treader where Eustace was told to undress (dragon skin) he accomplished something once he understood, but it required deep tears that hurt by the allegorical Christ character to fully "undress". He was unable to do it himself.
So while I do think we can do a bit of pruning "in a way", our efforts are mere maintenance (stewardship) with the natural byproduct of maturation but serious work we can't do on our own. I'm only saying this because I appreciated your post and it got me to thinking about our own efforts. I know there are some churches I've heard that only speak about the Lord doing the work in you and that it's all him. Tis true, but we aren't infants needing someone to change us. As we mature there is a sort of "self-maintenance" that goes on and should be understood, it's just rarely talked about. Part of the reason I typed all this is because there are times where I have been so wrapped up in Christian living that my eyes leave the Lord at times. Not "leaving" him if you understand me, but even going through a similar journey that you seem to have gone through it helps me to remember that.
I can't shake the feeling that as believers we can fall into "our" will for the kingdom and exalt ourselves a bit and go astray. Perhaps that's better than being asleep, but sometimes it's hard for me to tell. Constant guarding is crucial I agree.
Thanks for sharing
The expression is apropos. By pruning, I’m referencing thoughts, feelings, behaviors, etc. which compromise my purpose, mindset or heart. If I’m consciously aware of impediments or potential harm it’s my responsibility to address them.
It’s one thing to require assistance or lack the knowledge to handle the problem. And another to bury my head in the sand and close my eyes. Lying to myself is unacceptable (for me) and facing my shortcomings is liberating. Change requires acknowledgment and action. Growth is an ongoing process. God fashioned me with an earnest desire for each.
For me, Christian living is fulfilling my kingdom mission. I know my place in the body. Its intentional and purposeful with a goal in sight. That draws me nearer to Him.
I address this through two positions: being and becoming. The first begins with accepting who He says I am (earthly and spiritually). For example, if He called me to music, I’m a musician for His glory. My responsibility is yes and working in the capacity (gifts and talents) He’s provided. The how is His domain.
The second is the metamorphosis. This is His will made manifest in my person. Here you’ll find the scrutiny and pruning I mentioned in my post. I could echo Paul’s words, “I buffet my body and make it my slave” or use a descriptor more appropriate for myself.
My verbiage is intentional. I address my faith through language that’s understandable for the hearer. Irrespective of belief. I can’t fish with jargon.
~princesse
It’s one thing to require assistance or lack the knowledge to handle the problem. And another to bury my head in the sand and close my eyes. Lying to myself is unacceptable (for me) and facing my shortcomings is liberating. Change requires acknowledgment and action. Growth is an ongoing process. God fashioned me with an earnest desire for each.
For me, Christian living is fulfilling my kingdom mission. I know my place in the body. Its intentional and purposeful with a goal in sight. That draws me nearer to Him.
I address this through two positions: being and becoming. The first begins with accepting who He says I am (earthly and spiritually). For example, if He called me to music, I’m a musician for His glory. My responsibility is yes and working in the capacity (gifts and talents) He’s provided. The how is His domain.
The second is the metamorphosis. This is His will made manifest in my person. Here you’ll find the scrutiny and pruning I mentioned in my post. I could echo Paul’s words, “I buffet my body and make it my slave” or use a descriptor more appropriate for myself.
My verbiage is intentional. I address my faith through language that’s understandable for the hearer. Irrespective of belief. I can’t fish with jargon.
~princesse
C
It is OK to want someone beside you and there is nothing wrong about admitting you are not fine and not ok being alone just take care 😊
It is nice to share the ups and downs with someone and it is a wonderful feeling when you know that someone is there for you no matter what 😊
We never know... maybe one day suddenly things will take a sudden turn and boom! She is there standing in front of you. The person you've been waiting, the one you want to share all of you the one who will hold you for the rest of your life 😊 God is full of surprises! Keep trusting God. His timing is perfect 😇
God bless you ❤
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you got more than 12 people answering this thread so, you got some friends already.
am sorry we cant bring your wife back to you and you stuck with us random lot of christians instead....but being single is actually not that bad.
You might find it can actually be a lot more fun and free.
I was thinking how its funny that me being an introvert should mean marrried life would be better for me as I would only really need to focus exclusively on ONE person for all my needs
whereas being extrovert would mean married life could be stifling and if I was extrovert I would need a lot more people around me, like a large family, though you cant just keep having heaps of children all the time lol.
so I just wonder if thats got anything to do with your situation...that you cant cope well without having someone around you all the time? I do cherish my time alone cos if I was married I really wouldn have that I would think Id just be constantly thinking of my other half I suppose if I did end up by myself, but would I have that chance? no because married life entails that that person is always within reach cos they are one flesh.
sorry just my thoughts on this, it kind sounds like you had a leg amputated and you think its still there.
am sorry we cant bring your wife back to you and you stuck with us random lot of christians instead....but being single is actually not that bad.
You might find it can actually be a lot more fun and free.
I was thinking how its funny that me being an introvert should mean marrried life would be better for me as I would only really need to focus exclusively on ONE person for all my needs
whereas being extrovert would mean married life could be stifling and if I was extrovert I would need a lot more people around me, like a large family, though you cant just keep having heaps of children all the time lol.
so I just wonder if thats got anything to do with your situation...that you cant cope well without having someone around you all the time? I do cherish my time alone cos if I was married I really wouldn have that I would think Id just be constantly thinking of my other half I suppose if I did end up by myself, but would I have that chance? no because married life entails that that person is always within reach cos they are one flesh.
sorry just my thoughts on this, it kind sounds like you had a leg amputated and you think its still there.
Married life isn’t easier or better for introverts. Being introverted doesn’t mean the individual is service-driven or a joy to live with. There’s a difference from being comfortable in an environment with less stimulation and meeting your companion’s needs through selflessness and anticipatory service.
There is 50 degrees of separation between the two. And it takes a man to articulate the difference. Doing what you feel is best is not the same as pleasing him.
There is 50 degrees of separation between the two. And it takes a man to articulate the difference. Doing what you feel is best is not the same as pleasing him.
I got married at 53 after a long 30-year drought of a relationship. No, it wasn't from a prison sentence. I knew I could't handle singleness. What does the Bible tell you to do? That's the voice you need to listen to. I know what you're going through. If you need to get married you need to get married.