I Don't Want to be an Old Maid!!!
- Thread starter BrokenHearted1025
- Start date
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I am single and looking too. I would suggest reading a book by Henry Cloud called How to Get a Date Worth Keeping. Basically the book is challenging the idea that it is 100% up to God that we find a spouse. What i mean by that is we can't sit at home, eat lunch alone at work, spend lots of time alone and do nothing to meet men (or women). If we do that, expecting someone to walk into our lives, our only prospects will be the UPS person and the mail person. Sure if we are walking with God, he will put that special someone in our life, but we have to do out part by being as social and as open and welcoming as we can.
I am rereading it now and find it encouraging.
There is also the idea that we need to be inviting and approachable. Some people don't understand this but it can be illustrated this way: Ever known people who ALWAYS seem to have a crowd around them...these people have many friends. Their body language, their personality and I am sure a bunch of other stuff that I cannot identify, send messages to others that invite them in. You don't have to be the life of the party to attract others, you just have to be open, inviting and welcoming of others. The most obvious thing these people have is right on their face: they genuinely smile and look at others in the eye.
I am rereading it now and find it encouraging.
There is also the idea that we need to be inviting and approachable. Some people don't understand this but it can be illustrated this way: Ever known people who ALWAYS seem to have a crowd around them...these people have many friends. Their body language, their personality and I am sure a bunch of other stuff that I cannot identify, send messages to others that invite them in. You don't have to be the life of the party to attract others, you just have to be open, inviting and welcoming of others. The most obvious thing these people have is right on their face: they genuinely smile and look at others in the eye.
S
StoneThrower
Guest
I am single and looking too. I would suggest reading a book by Henry Cloud called How to Get a Date Worth Keeping. Basically the book is challenging the idea that it is 100% up to God that we find a spouse. What i mean by that is we can't sit at home, eat lunch alone at work, spend lots of time alone and do nothing to meet men (or women). If we do that, expecting someone to walk into our lives, our only prospects will be the UPS person and the mail person. Sure if we are walking with God, he will put that special someone in our life, but we have to do out part by being as social and as open and welcoming as we can.
I am rereading it now and find it encouraging.
There is also the idea that we need to be inviting and approachable. Some people don't understand this but it can be illustrated this way: Ever known people who ALWAYS seem to have a crowd around them...these people have many friends. Their body language, their personality and I am sure a bunch of other stuff that I cannot identify, send messages to others that invite them in. You don't have to be the life of the party to attract others, you just have to be open, inviting and welcoming of others. The most obvious thing these people have is right on their face: they genuinely smile and look at others in the eye.
Hello, Over here. Hey, look my way. LOL
Sorry I couldnt resist.
I am single and looking too. I would suggest reading a book by Henry Cloud called How to Get a Date Worth Keeping. Basically the book is challenging the idea that it is 100% up to God that we find a spouse. What i mean by that is we can't sit at home, eat lunch alone at work, spend lots of time alone and do nothing to meet men (or women). If we do that, expecting someone to walk into our lives, our only prospects will be the UPS person and the mail person. Sure if we are walking with God, he will put that special someone in our life, but we have to do out part by being as social and as open and welcoming as we can.
I am rereading it now and find it encouraging.
There is also the idea that we need to be inviting and approachable. Some people don't understand this but it can be illustrated this way: Ever known people who ALWAYS seem to have a crowd around them...these people have many friends. Their body language, their personality and I am sure a bunch of other stuff that I cannot identify, send messages to others that invite them in. You don't have to be the life of the party to attract others, you just have to be open, inviting and welcoming of others. The most obvious thing these people have is right on their face: they genuinely smile and look at others in the eye.
Your eyes are sparkling. I like that.
L
lilly122466
Guest
First you are still young. Second you cannot define yourself by being married or with someone. Third find happiness within yourself and wait and see what God has in store for you. Stop worrying about it.
Good advice that I will consider. I am all set with the waiting part but how does that happiness thing work?
I always have told my daughter that we carry our happiness with us. I realized early in life that people don't like to be around sad, unhappy, complaining people and so I decided that no matter what the circumstance that I would find something about the situation to be content with it - or happy.
When I really became happy was when I realized that God is with me all the time and that I even though I live alone that I am really not alone. I know that God loves me unconditionally and that He cares about everything in my life and that really helps me to be content knowing that God loves and cares about me.
I try and keep the line of communication open with God and I see a phone line open all the time so that the conversation is a continual one. I can talk to God whenever I want to and I know He hears me and cares about whatever the moment/situation is happening.
I prayed this morning for protection/traveling mercies as I was going to drive from Clearwater to Sarasota and was so happy when God answered the prayer keeping my friend and I safe as another driver literally almost drove into the side of us - but my God protected us helping me to avoid the collision that certainly could have taken place. Made me happy and thankful that God chose to answer yes to my earlier prayer request.
So as long as you have God in your life even though trials come our way or loneliness from not having a mate there is no reason to not be happy knowing that God is with us and on our side.
P
psalm6819
Guest
Hi BH1025, I didn't marry until my 30's so I kinda know how it feels.(and I'm an extreme introvert, my idea of a good time is a good book) One thing that might help is a sport. Try a softball league , a pool league, bowling, boating safety class, Loew's has free home improvement seminars (informal) volunteer somewhere, you'll need think outside trhe box. Guys love to give advice and are quite willing to offer it, then when they feel like a hero for helping, they are well disposed toward the reciepient of thier largesse. Hang in there and don't lose hope, cuz right now, somewhere, that special he is feeling the same way you do. God bless you.
You gave excellent advice. It is quite true what you said about us guys. I am an introvert myself but I do enjoy a good conversation with a friend.